Date: March 20, 2007 09:02 am Title: scattered
It took me a day to collect my thoughts enough to review - because I'm so lost in the land of fluff resolutions...
Anyway - this was like a perfect storm. Chaos all around and only two people know what the hell is going on. The dialogue made my insides all twisty.
And though I chose to channel that feeling into a fic where Jim and Pam do their laundry ;) I wanted you to know I appreciated your version of current events. :)
Author's Response: Hee, thanks, Krissy :) Perfect storm - I like that! I've wanted to read + write nothing but angst since November; hope this one didn't send you to the medicine cabinet for some Tums! I'll check out that laundry fic when I get the chance... ;)
Date: March 20, 2007 02:59 am Title: scattered
Strange how as the pieces scatter they come back together again.
Brilliant, absolutely - I loved Pieces, and the way you brought that into this universe, well - there's even more of a reason for Roy to have completely lost it that night Poor Richard's. Not that I'm saying they're good reasons, but still.
Also, Jim yelling? And Roy thinking it's all freaking revenge? Brilliant.
And this He's wondering if he'll ever stop seeing his life play out on shrubbery - all sorts of genius. And the Angela and the Pam and the Karen and how in the end you know it's Pam, but something about it - it's so good I can't help thinking it could be Karen, too. Maybe.
Crap, I have to read this again now. Love this to bits. Seriously.
Author's Response: Wow, awesome, moofoot! Yeah, I think a lot of the time, Roy can't see past the end of his nose, so I tried to imagine what he'd think their motivations were - after all, Jim had been with him, so he couldn't actually fall for Pam, right? :) I'm also glad that the end worked both ways for you - I wanted a little ambiguity there.
Date: March 19, 2007 08:52 pm Title: scattered
Jim struggled, because he had expected this months ago, had prepared for it, but now? Now it was like seeing someone choke at a restaurant, and realizing he'd forgotten how to do the Heimlich. He stammered, but Roy cut him off.
THAT is the best analogy EVER!!!! Nice work here!
Author's Response: Hey, thanks, LoveFool! :)
Date: March 19, 2007 02:15 pm Title: scattered
Wow. I thought Pieces was really interesting when I originally read it (and of course, I HAD to re-read!). This is a great addition to that one. I LOVE when Roy is trying to figure out if anyone "knows" about their hot, tawdry, guy-thing!! Yikes!
This is just... great.
Author's Response: Thanks, Too Late Kev :) Glad you liked the original, too!
Date: March 19, 2007 01:34 pm Title: scattered
Love the first part - in that single moment, almost an impressionistic account of all his senses. Perfectly frames what follows. And, as always, the tiny details sing...her thumb on his neck asking THE question? So right. Such a lovely emotionally there ending.
And also - you wrote the fight without over-writing it and it's so much more powerful for it. (Writing a convincing physical confrontation is hard...have to admit I took the easy way around and began my post-Cocktails fic after the last punch was thown, LOL.) Lovely and very real.
Author's Response: Thanks, Colette :) These characters need some "emotionally-there" moments - I hope they get them by the end of the season. I'm glad the non-fight worked. I wanted the words to be what punched everyone in the scene.
Date: March 19, 2007 01:23 pm Title: scattered
"Because I love her, you stupid fuck!" Wow. That's one way for it to come out, isn't it?
I love the emotional tension you sustain throughout this. All the perfect details are like the little background noises you hear when a room gets too quiet, suddenly. Lovely, as usual. Have I mentioned that I think you're good at this?
Author's Response: I've been a little worried since I posted that that line may be too harsh. But it's what got typed in the fever of the moment, so. I'm glad to hear the tension was maintained, too. Thanks, Lis :)
Date: March 19, 2007 12:06 pm Title: scattered
Wow, that was incredibly powerful; I didn't realize I'd stopped breathing at Jim's "Because I love her" until I was finished reading and exhaled really loudly. It's really remarkable how well this bookends Pieces - how well what happened in Cocktails sets the stage for this, too. As usual, you're a master of the subtle nuances that just say it all: tears dripping from Karen's chin, Pam's heels on Jim's feet as she tries to shield him; Dwight's muttered, "I have to go."
Just amazing work, as usual. You never disappoint.
Author's Response: Man, when Roy uttered his threat in Cocktails, I thought, "Follow up on that backstory, Shan!" Anyway, glad it worked for you. Thanks, girl7 :)