Date: April 18, 2007 02:24 pm Title: Chapter 6
Eeee, Phyllis and Toby! This is just so darn cute :)
Author's Response: Thanks! Phyllis and Toby are two of my favorite characters so I'm glad they could participate.
Date: April 18, 2007 01:15 pm Title: Chapter 6
This story is working out really well, but I have to say I don't like how the author (who, if I'm correct, doesn't ever actually have a name - but then again I could be wrong) suddenly got so snippy to Office Chair after he found out she was 16. Sure, she's not legal yet and was vaguely (or not-so-vaguely) inappropriate, but grudges are just plain mean. Neck Watcher, though, those are some interesting interactions. Good dialogue.
Author's Response: I think the author is just getting a little impatient with her. And maybe he knows something really inappropriate is coming up in the story and he wants to warn her off. Or, it could be that we're in the middle of state testing this week and I've spent 2 days (and have 2 more days ahead of me) staring at 14 year olds who don't want to be cooped up in the same room for 6 hours and they have gotten on my last nerve :) I think he can find some love for her in an upcoming chapter. Thanks for your comments!
10 [Report This]Date: April 18, 2007 12:48 pm Title: Chapter 6
I'm loving this story soooo much. Very original and executed well.
Author's Response: Thanks PuffingNoise!!!
Date: April 18, 2007 12:37 pm Title: Chapter 6
I realize how much The Office owns me daily also... its quite sad I think.
Jim/Toby... I think they are (were?) close... but now that Toby also has his eye on Pam, not sure how they feel about each other!
I changed my mind about Angela when I realized how much like her I am. And I love Conflict Resolution, but I hate the fact it is on the same disc as Casino Night (cause that breaks my heart)
Author's Response: Emily--Thanks for all of your comments. You are an awesome reviewer. I'm sitting here imagining Toby and Jim fighting it out for Pam. Hee. I love Toby!
Date: April 18, 2007 11:04 am Title: Chapter 5
I can picture those being Jim's thoughts. I think he was a bit angry at Pam during season two, especially during that episode. I think he alternates between being angry at Pam for not recognizing what is in front of her, Roy for being Roy, and possibly, even himself for not doing anything about it.
I mean, I really like how you are explaining that the characters don't really know what we see. I mean, I hate mentioning my own fics, but just because I can picture it I am, because yeah, I really was like, thinking about editing, and hindsight is 20/20. I mean, I am sure a lot of things that Jim did made a lot more sense post Casino Night. Its like, yeah... so, I think about things like this too much. Glad I am not the only one.
Haha. And I made Pam read a fanfic in my story. (it ended with simple happy JAM. I am still not completely happy with the way it turned out). But I really love it, because in this story it really is a lot of what I think about it, and its such a different idea of the way to convey those thoughts.
Date: April 18, 2007 10:55 am Title: Chapter 4
I really think that Michael will eventually be the one to somehow bring those two crazy kids together!
I have also been wondering about what if Pam's attractiveness came from the fact that she was unavailable. I don't believe it, I don't want to believe it, but the thought has entered my mind once or twice.
AND throwing in a TWSS!
Haha, Dwight doing it as a gift to the leader! Angela too uptight to poop!
Date: April 18, 2007 10:41 am Title: Chapter 3
I just watched Booze Cruise again this week? I think yesterday? I dunno. I kinda stick my DVD in and let it play and play and play. So, it was recently, but not sure if yesterday or Monday
Wow, I really like that thing about how Jim was thinking during the seconsds... really cool!
I always wonder why Jim didn't tell her then, but, I mean, I can also understand it. its why Pam hasn't told him yet this season. Its hard. Its like, wow, I can really just imagine how hard it was for Jim to do it on Casino Night, and it was probably so much of just a she looked at him, and he knew time was running out. But I have been in (am in), a position comparable to them.... not telling someone I love them, but just telling someone a huge life changing thing. And I am like, always thinking, tell tell tell, this is the perfect time. But, its like, no. it is hard and SO hard, and its like, then you wait a second (or 27) too long, and the moment is gone, and you curse yourself, and you hate yourself, and promises of doing it tomorrow that never really happen.
And I do believe he could have meaningless sex with Katy. Not quite sure if I can believe it being in that exact conversation... but I think I can believe in the idea of it.
Date: April 18, 2007 10:36 am Title: Chapter 2
Gah! So I have wanted to read this forever, since a)I enjoy God and b) this concept is so cool.
And now I have a chance to!
I enjoy all the screen names you came up!
Its so weird, because I am like, trying to figure out how I want to review this. because its like, quoting reviews to reviews. Its crazy. Its so different, but I love it. And its like, makes me curious as to what the real story is, but I can picure it. Am I making any sense?
but I love it when stories that seem so real that they give such depth to the characters. I really do love stories like that. So I am glad that Not JAM just Jim and Pam does that.
And I am a big fan of editing. I mention it slightly in my fic It's Simple. Its like, yeah, ya know, we are only getting 30 minutes into these peoples lives out of like 8+ hours of footage if it is one day. So, yeah.
10 [Report This]Date: April 18, 2007 08:40 am Title: Chapter 5
This is an obnoxiously unique story that could only have been made for this particular show, given its underlying premise. The fact that you're one of the first that I've seen to pick up on that says a lot about your ability to think outside the box.
I do hope you have some kind of outline sketched out so this doesn't turn into a ramble fest. Serialized fanfic tends to go on and on and on, and without an injection of new material, it can quickly stagnate. Thankfully, you do have a lot of material to absorb, plus, we still have the rest of this season to go for.
I did notice that Jim is single. So would that place this piece in the future? Would this be sometime in the summer after Season Three has been released on DVD? Or does this happen after the documentary is over, and Jim and Pam have STILL not gotten together? Lots of potential thoughts there. I'm sure you have a clear concept of "when" this story is, but I still wanted to throw that out there.
I enjoy the inherent mystery built into the story. We've clearly seen Pam and Jim, but it's interesting to find out the rest of everyone. There is a danger in getting so wrapped up in the mystery of the other individuals that we lose the focus of the story. Not that it wouldn't be cool to have most, if not all, the reviewers to be Office Staff--but you'll have on heck of a battle making it convincing. Not that I mean to discourage you; I think you could definitely rise to the challenge.
Another random thought: any consideration of having "real" fanfic authors leave reviews? Ask some people if they'd be interested in leaving a review. GodInThisChilis could leave a review, and, at least for me, it wouldn't even be a distraction. I think it's a very plausible, believable way to bend the fourth wall.
Generally, I'd say stick to your concept--it's a winner. To find a way to keep this story completely within its currently defined bounds is a challenge, but as a holistic piece, it'll be that much cooler if all done properly. At the same time, don't let yourself be a slave to it. If you need the story to go in one way and the only way to get that is good old fashioned prose, then by all means go ahead. Have a plan (so you don't go on forever and ever), but don't be its slave either. You've got a great start, and I'm going to add a typical response:
YOU HAVE TO PUBLISH THE NEXT CHAPTER SOOOOOON. Or even now.
Author's Response:
Wow! Thanks so much for your constructive comments. I've had in my head the general idea that this was written right around the time it is now but I've clarified it in my head...and perhaps I need to in the author's notes that this was started during the hiatus and will continue through the negotiation when I'll take it AU. I have a general outline of what I want to happen I just need to decide how to break it down into chapters.
I do have plans to reference a few famous stories in an upcoming chapter and I like your idea of having real author's in the stories....I just didn't want to offend anyone.
And you've hit the nail on the head. The last chapter (or epilouge) will feature some straight on prose.
Again....thanks for your comments!
10 [Report This]Date: April 17, 2007 08:40 pm Title: Chapter 5
NeckWatcher = Pam
OfficeManager (the author, right?) = Jim
AnythingAwesome = Kelly
That's spec, at least. Great story, again!
Author's Response: I think you've got it :)
Date: April 17, 2007 08:33 pm Title: Chapter 5
God I'm slow. I mean, I figured out by the second chapter who the author of this story was. Took me until this chapter to realize who NeckWatcher was. This is a really clever story. I love the way you're writing it, very original. Update soon, please.
Author's Response: Thanks for your comments. I was worried about telegraphing too early about who was who, but I decided it makes the real story more interesting. Thanks again!
Date: April 17, 2007 08:30 pm Title: Chapter 5
I've got to be honest with you - at first the idea of this fic didn't appeal to me at all. But, now? I love it. I love how we get glimpses of the story through the lines reviewers put in their reviews - I love the subtle hints in the author's responses. I love how you seem to be getting in their heads and going back through critical S2 Jim and Pam moments. This is so well done and I am really looking forward to reading more!
Author's Response: Thanks so much. I'm glad you are enjoying it now.
9 [Report This]Date: April 17, 2007 06:20 pm Title: Chapter 4
Hahaha, AnythingAwesome is deifnitely the real Kelly. That just cracks me up! Aw, Michael is "special", and I love him and I love that Jim loves him. The idea of Jim putting Pam's voicemail messages on his iPod is gorgeous. You're making me love Jim again! I've been having some problems with him recently (though I just rewatched s2 and fell in love again) but this is bringing back the sympathy for him. Heh, NeckWatcher seems like she's had her heart kind of broken. I WONDER WHY? Well, obviously, I can't wait for more. Fantastic stuff!
Author's Response: I've been watching season 2 recently as well. Jim's dicky behavior as of late and some amazing Ryan/Pam stories here (Hey Jealousy) I've been seeing Jim as not someone who I want Pam to end up with. Hopefully that will start turning around soon! Thanks for your comments.
Date: April 17, 2007 04:22 pm Title: Chapter 4
I must admit, from some of the quotes (not all, but some) I feel like the actual story being reviewed wouldn't really be to my tastes, but I'm enjoying this side of it! Getting used to the format, and it's still so fresh and unique. I'm intrigued by NeckWatcher and starting to form theories...
Author's Response: Hey Semby--I was thinking about that....that even I'm not sure what the whole OfficeManager story would look like. Part of the reason for doing the story the way I chose to do it is that I had a bunch of little ideas floating around that I didn't know what to do with or if they even would work as an entire story. So....they just became bits and pieces of OM's story.
Date: April 17, 2007 01:52 pm Title: Chapter 4
Wow! I love this! It did take me almost 10 minutes of flipping around from page to page, trying to figure out where the hell the story was, before I could actually begin reading it. Now that I have I can't wait for the next chapter. Very interesting format. And since the "author" has revealed that he is a guy, I keep thinking the actual author is a guy. Yikes. I am really confused.
Oh, perhaps I should have put this in the correct chapter but I love the line about "I keep forgetting these are real people..." Sooo like everyone (myself included) who keeps forgetting they are NOT real people. Love it!
Author's Response: Thanks MrsKamorri. I was worried that the format wouldn't work and be confusing, but I didn't want to overexplain in notes. I'm not a guy, but I play one in fic! Thanks again for your kind comments.
10 [Report This]Date: April 16, 2007 06:42 pm Title: Chapter 3
I seriously love this story so much. I don't think a more original idea has been written, and you are writing it beautifully. Does NeckWatcher know who the author actualy is? Does he know who she is? I think maybe he... doesn't. Yeah, I don't think he does. But she? She may have some idea. Hmmm, will be SO INTERESTING to see how it progresses, and when they both realise for sure that they're talking to each other all those other things. This is such a fantastic story, and I can't wait for more! Very, very intriguing idea. Great work.
Author's Response: Thanks! I don't want to give too much away, but I really don't think Jim suspects anything just yet.....
10 [Report This]Date: April 16, 2007 03:26 pm Title: Chapter 3
WOW. Shoooooooooooosh (a long exhale). I know I'm repeating myself, but this is freaking brilliant - and when I read his response that Jim would "totally do that," I got a little chill, like I was actually reading Jim's words. That came out sounding incredibly lame - just my attempt at saying that this is so meta, but that's what makes it even more realistic, I think.
Simply amazing.
Author's Response: Thanks again! I really am so glad that you like it.
10 [Report This]Date: April 16, 2007 03:21 pm Title: Chapter 2
Okay, first of all: I've read many versions of Jim's card (have even written one myself), and yours is hands down just it. Wow. Amazing. And it's Stanley's daughter with the crush, isn't it???? Heee! God, this is just so freaking brilliant; you really do nail Jim's voice, and what a great way to let us see into his perspective on the episodes. I would love to see you do this with every episode....
Thanks for this!
Author's Response: Thanks again! You know I hadn't even thought that Jims Office Chair could be Stanley's daughter....but since she has a thing for Ryan, you never know :)
10 [Report This]Date: April 16, 2007 03:16 pm Title: Chapter 1
Oh.my.god. This is absolutely brilliant! Jim writing fanfic? And NeckWatcher...? Ohhhhhhhh. Seriously, what an amazing, amazing premise - totally compelling!
Wait...you aren't John Krasinski, are you? :oD
Author's Response: All shall be revealed :)
Date: April 16, 2007 01:34 pm Title: Chapter 1
This is such a cool conceit and makes so much sense. (particularly after the third chapter) I can't wait to see if any other Office peeps are writing reviews. And I seriously wish I had come up with the SN Jims_Office_Chair.
Author's Response: That's not totally my creation. In my main fandom....the Eagles....a lot of girls comment on how they'd like to be Don Henley's drum stool....don't ask :) Thanks for the positive comments.
Date: April 16, 2007 11:52 am Title: Chapter 1
I am writing a review for a fanfic story written as if it is reviews of a fanfic story written by a character in the original tv series.
We're through the looking glass, here, people!
I am really enjoying watching this unfold...like most people, I am ON to "Neckwatcher...." but is our author? And, are any of our other reviewers in the "Office" universe? Is Stanley's daughter the underage frisky girl known as Jim's Office Chair? I must have these questions resolved! More, please!
Author's Response: And now I'm responding to a review as me....not as my character who also responds to reviews....and now my brain is officially broken. Thanks for reading!
Date: April 16, 2007 11:49 am Title: Chapter 3
Oooo, I get it now! I was a little confused as to where this was going, but I see now, and it's a really smart idea. Very creative...
Author's Response: I'm glad its starting to make sense. Thanks!
Date: April 16, 2007 11:39 am Title: Chapter 3
I just started reading this story and I love the idea that Jim would write fanfic if the show was real and that Pam would read it. They are both in such bad places and don't seem to have an outlet for the emotions on the show right now, I'd like to think they are working through their problems somehow. I can't wait for more :)
Author's Response: That's exactly what I was thinking. They need a way to talk. This was inspired partly by the amazing and incomprable Squirrel McPants and something I was working on in which Jim harbored fantasies of being a writer. Glad you like it.
9 [Report This]Date: April 15, 2007 11:48 am Title: Chapter 1
This is interesting... I can't figure out if Pam knows who the author is, though... I guess we'll see!
Author's Response: Yes you will. :)
Date: April 15, 2007 08:43 am Title: Chapter 2
This is a little disorienting to read, but I think that's because it's such an original and cool concept, and I'm sure I'll get used to it. It's cool to get only the slightest hints about what the story really contains and see how reactions unfold from there. Interested to see where this goes!
Author's Response: Semby--I was worried about that. I wanted the story to be told more through what the "author" was saying in the comments than through the actual story. I'll try to make that clearer in upcoming chapters. To be honest, sometimes when I'm writing it I'm confusing myself :) but I want to try to make it work. Thanks again for your feedback!