Reviews For Breathing Out
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Reviewer: SarahPlainandTall Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: February 12, 2009 04:17 pm Title: Chapter 1: Breathe in, breathe out tell me all of your doubt and everybody bleeds this way just the same

This was possibly the best version of "the date" I have ever read. It captured all of the awkwardness that I imagine would be there, and all of the longing and a little bit of sweetness too. I like that you said they talked about everything BUT what was going on between them. That is classic Jim and Pam. Some people like to jump to all of the fluff (and/or smut) right away, but I don't think it would happen like that. So, yeah. I think this was just about the best I've read. Well done!!!

Reviewer: Sonni Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2008 04:08 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

This was absolutely beautiful, I really enjoyed reading this, it did make my heart ache at times but that's what makes good fanfiction, eh? :)

Reviewer: kaystar Signed 8 [Report This]
Date: March 10, 2008 10:42 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

What a beautiful happy ending.  Great job!  



Author's Response: I'm way late in responding, but I just wanted to tell you I appreciate the review -- and I'm glad you enjoyed the story!

Reviewer: gotkona Signed [Report This]
Date: March 01, 2008 03:21 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Jim is just too cute.  Great story as usual.

Author's Response: Isn't he, though?  Much as I love writing angsty Jim (and you KNOW I love torturing the poor boy), I also have a great time writing silly, happy Jim.  Thanks so much for reviewing!

Reviewer: blanche deveraux Signed [Report This]
Date: March 01, 2008 09:33 am Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Wonderful! You created some really authentic, believable moments to tide us over until April! Thanks :)

Author's Response:

First of all, as someone who used to watch "The Golden Girls" with my granny and great aunt, I must say I love your name.  :o) Second of all, it's great to hear that this helped you through the strike a bit -- any little relief helps, right??  (Is it April 10th yet??????)

Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: Vampiric Blood Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: February 28, 2008 04:20 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

I really love how you handled the tension between Jim and Pam.  I think your take on how Jim would've been so reticent about fully exposing himself again rings true.  The dialog, descriptions ... it's all so good.  I'm sorry it's complete!

Author's Response:

It's a relief to hear you say that his reticience rings true -- I hadn't really thought about it prior to "Money."  But there seemed to be such a marked shift in him after that conversation with Dwight that it seemed as if maybe he'd turned a critical corner. 

Thanks so much for reviewing!

Reviewer: honeypioneer Signed [Report This]
Date: February 28, 2008 01:48 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

I love this fic! you do such a great job of capturing their thoughts...kudos!

Author's Response:

Wow - thank you so much!  I was drawn into writing fic in the first place after Casino Night, because I just could not sit still until I explored what could've been going on in both their heads in those moments.

Thanks for taking the time to review!

Reviewer: Abigail Signed [Report This]
Date: February 28, 2008 07:22 am Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Breathtaking... (no pun intended!)  This whole story was fantastic and the last chapter literally took my breath away.

Author's Response: Heh -- I'm such a nerd; I actually quite love puns.  :o)  Thanks so much for reviewing; I'm really glad you liked this last chapter! 

Reviewer: NanReg Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: February 28, 2008 07:08 am Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Girl7, this was wonderful.  I've read several "Money"-inspired fics, dwelling on Jim's conversation with Dwight bringing him back to a dark place (and I have loved them).  In this one, however, you use that conversation as a catalyst for Jim to push past his hesitancy.  Absolutely loved it.  The ending was so worth the wait.

Author's Response:

Thank you so much!  That was one of those scenes that I knew I had to explore, because there was so much potential subtext going on.  And even though I think Jim genuinely did feel for Dwight, I think he probably couldn't help but feel simultaneously relieved to no longer be where Dwight was at that moment.  I just imagine that Jim probably has a gazillion moments when it hits him that he's actually with Pam now; it must seem like a miracle after all that time and all those obstacles.

...Hmm?  What's that?  They're not real people?  Oh, that's right; I totally forgot.  :o)

Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: EverybodyHurts Signed [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2008 08:15 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Sigh.  What a great ending to this lovely story.  I had to reread the whole thing to enjoy it all over again.  Love how you've put into words Jim's thoughts during the stairwell conversation and how he was galvanized afterward to pour out his feelings in that kiss, a la Casino Night, but with the happy realization that he doesn't have to hide his love any more, he can revel in it, PDA memo be damned!

And I'm like, whoa, how many more sexy Jim visuals can girl7 give us in one chapter?  Long sleeved black tee, white button down with black blazer and jeans...I'm like, stop this, you're going to melt my brain with the pretty!  Just kidding though.  I'll deal.

I promise I'll review your latest chapter of your other story soon.  Gotta reread it, particularly the kissing...mmmm.

 



Author's Response:

Well it's just terrific -- seriously -- to read that you liked my version of what went on in Jim's head during the stairwell thing, because that was exactly the catalyst to this story. 

And c'mon...we all know that from time to time, I am guilty of lapsing into a bit of JK lust in my stories.  So sue me.  ;o)  (Seriously, though, the minute I saw that Men's Health cover, I knew that outfit would have to make its way into a fic.  Wow.)

Thanks so much, as always, for reviewing!

Reviewer: lisahoo Signed [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2008 08:07 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

Ok, now I know for a fact that girl7 is trying to kill me dead.  Because you KNOW I have to go back and read the earlier chapters so now I'm all ear-deep in the imagined angst of 'now that I've got him/her and KNOW how great it is, how will I ever survive without him/her?'. 

Answer: you can't.  That is it.  You're done.



Author's Response:

I know, I know -- I am seriously a skunk for taking so long to update this.  (I really feel incredibly guilty about that.)  I just had absolutely no desire to write for several months there (still not sure why -- the strike, maybe...?), and unfortunately, I can't force it.  Bah. 

Anyway, thanks for being such a consistent & awesome reviewer!

Reviewer: Catie9 Signed [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2008 07:08 pm Title: Chapter 4: Look left look right to the moon in the night / and everything under the stars is in your arms

girl7!!!!! Another update (different story, I realize, all still gold)!!! I love that you have Pam tell Jim about the Dwight comforting her moment the night they're at the beet farm. It just adds so much to Jim's realization! This was a great end to a wonderful story, and while part of me is sad that it's over, another part of me realizes I still have "Nearing the Edge" looming on the horizon!! Great stuff!!!

Author's Response:

I'm glad you liked that moment; I really had hoped to see Pam tell Jim that.  (Actually, I was really, really, REALLY hoping that in BfV, Jim would come around the corner and find her crying.  But the scene with Dwight was so precious that I wasn't too disappointed.)

Just updated Nearing the Edge, BTW.  :o)

Thanks for reviewing!

Reviewer: Cousin Mose Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: February 27, 2008 05:35 pm Title: Chapter 1: Breathe in, breathe out tell me all of your doubt and everybody bleeds this way just the same

See, just when I thought it was safe to go back into the fic pool... Just when I managed to pick up the pieces of my broken brain after reading your latest from "Nearing the Edge," you come along and sucker punch me with this? 

Not cool, girl7.... not cool. :D

In all seriousness, though, I can already tell that this story is going to be a doozy. Makes me wish I had time to read more than just the first chapter right now. But I promise to come back soon and read and review the remaining chapters, okay?

Also, it will sound totally inadequate and will border on silly to say this, but I honestly don't have any other words right now except "WOW," "GUH," and "FLAVENSTEENG," which I don't think is an actual word, but which nonetheless sums up my reaction to this story.

In conclusion, Hi, I'm Mose, and I'm an idiot for only having recently discovered your work. I'm trying to rectify that. Thank you. :) 



Author's Response:

You are too kind, my friend.  :o) I'm glad you enjoyed the first chapter -- and yeah, this one is a dark one, but I can assure you that it ends on a very happy note.  (You know I'm incapable of ending a story with darkness.  Well, except for the Jim/Jan one, but that didn't count.)  :oD

Thanks so much for reviewing; you rock!

Reviewer: belsum Signed [Report This]
Date: December 03, 2007 11:41 am Title: Chapter 3: breathe in breathe out move on and break down if everyone goes away I will stay

It takes me so many sessions to read these chapters - they're too long to get through in a single lunch break!  I'm glad you passed the pain around instead of focusing all your torture on Jim for a change.  :-)  But I'm not sure that Jim would be privy to Pam's thoughts in his flashback.  Heh!  Still, it was really nice to explore her reaction to his return and even better was Jim's reaction to seeing Roy's change.



Author's Response:

Yeah, the chapters in this one ran a bit longer than usual -- which is really saying something given my propensity for being long winded.  :o) (And you're absolutely right to call me on the p.o.v. shift -- I'd intended to make a note that it was from both points of view, but totally forgot.) 

I was disappointed, actually, that we didn't get to see Jim's reaction to the change in Roy -- I was convinced it'd be this huge awkward moment wherein Jim would be as stunned at Hot!Roy as some of the rest of us were.  :o)

Thanks so much for reviewing!

Reviewer: Daoust Signed [Report This]
Date: November 20, 2007 09:22 am Title: Chapter 3: breathe in breathe out move on and break down if everyone goes away I will stay

I am saying a lot of things, but I believe myself when I say that this is quickly becoming my new favourite fanfic. You are such a skilled writer.  And its not just one line or one paragraph; it's the story as a whole.  It's just really well written, and most importantly for fanfic, its really easy and fun to read.  You know its a great fanfic when the end of the chapter comes too soon, and you are sad because theres no more, and you don't know if you can hold out until the next chapter comes up. That's how I feel about this fanfic.  Well done.



Author's Response: Well I owe you a big fat apology for letting this fic languish as long as I did -- seriously, I feel awful about that.  It was just the strangest thing -- from Thanksgiving until a few weeks ago, I had absolutely zero desire to write.  I'd written bits of this chapter, but couldn't get myself to finish it.   In any case: Thank you so much for your really generous review; I so appreciate it!

Reviewer: StarryDreamer Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 05:43 pm Title: Chapter 3: breathe in breathe out move on and break down if everyone goes away I will stay

Gosh!!!  So heartbreaking so many ways, but oh so wonderful in other was. I really love your recap of the Merger.  I just watched this episode the other day and you really do a fantastic job of articulating the tumultuous feelings that Jim is going through in that moment.  And the Pam POV is just as fabulous.  Win-win-win!!

Reviewer: Abigail Signed [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 04:43 pm Title: Chapter 1: Breathe in, breathe out tell me all of your doubt and everybody bleeds this way just the same

(Sorry for the 2nd review as a reply) OMG, I LOVE this story!  I just recommended it over at the NBC Message Board. :)

Author's Response: Oh good lord -- never apologize for that!  :o)  And wow, thanks so much for rec'cing it over there!  :o)

Reviewer: kaystar Signed 8 [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 03:16 pm Title: Chapter 2: hold on hold tight make it through another night every day there comes a song with the dawn

I like and appreciate how you combine angst and happiness in the same chapter - with the happiness winning.  And boy did it win here, excellent smushiness.

Author's Response:

Thanks so much; it's nice to hear that!  And I promise: the final chapter is heavier on the steam & fluff and lighter on the angst.  :o)

Thanks so much for reviewing!

Reviewer: Abigail Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 03:06 pm Title: Chapter 3: breathe in breathe out move on and break down if everyone goes away I will stay

My mouth was literally hanging open as I read this.  You have done a magnificent job filling in all the blanks.  I cannot wait until the next chapter.  Hurry please! 

Author's Response:

Really!?  Yay!  Seriously -- love it that you found it that compelling!  I've worried a lot about this one.  :O)

Thanks so much for your feedback!

Reviewer: Pamalama Signed [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 01:21 pm Title: Chapter 3: breathe in breathe out move on and break down if everyone goes away I will stay

I love that song that you're using! And ironically, I have seen that movie on YouTube, and more than once have I thought about getting inspiration from it. It's great-your references are spot on. Please continue soon!

Author's Response:

I love it, too, and I found it via that video on youtube (...which I found thanks to Starry Dreamer).  It's an incredible piece of work; I'm just awed by some of the videos people put together.  So glad you're enjoying this story! 

Thanks so much for the review!

Reviewer: belsum Signed [Report This]
Date: November 19, 2007 09:45 am Title: Chapter 2: hold on hold tight make it through another night every day there comes a song with the dawn

Wow.  It was really hard to figure out what was going on when I finally got back to this chapter after having to stop in the middle.  I forgot about your terribly angst addiction!

Author's Response:

Sorry you found it confusing -- and oh yes, am addicted to the angst.  Cannot help it -- I blame JK's performance in the confession scene -- absolutely hooked me.  :o)

Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: Colette Signed [Report This]
Date: November 12, 2007 09:34 am Title: Chapter 2: hold on hold tight make it through another night every day there comes a song with the dawn

Ah, dazed, sated Jim...is there a sexier image? I think not, lol. Still intrigued with how you're going back and forth between time periods...And I like that you opened with the stairwell scene, cause that moment kind of galvanized Jim's emotional journey over several years, didn't it? So nice to see him emotionally awake (here and on the show) after last year's big sleep...and starting to wake up about his life beyond Pam too. Well, as always, I finish one of your epic chapters, feel oddly close to a fictional character and still want more. You bring out the glutton in me, missy ;-)

Author's Response:

Is there a sexier image than dazed, sated Jim?   ...Maybe dazed, sated JK?  (Couldn't resist!)  I'm glad you're enjoying the back and forth; I worried that it'd be too confusing.  I was just intrigued with the idea of making sense of the present via the past, if that makes any sense.  And YES -- as usual you're spot on with your metaphor: He's finally awake now (and I think the final stage of that awakening -- can you tell I just taught Kate Chopin?  hee -- happened in the stairwell). 

Thanks, as always, for such a thoughtful and insightful review; you rock!

Reviewer: kells8995 Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: November 11, 2007 09:00 pm Title: Chapter 2: hold on hold tight make it through another night every day there comes a song with the dawn

Yay!  So happy to get an update from you.

This was, as usual, awesome.  I love the scenario you created for their first time.  You're building things up nicely - from Jim being hesitant to Pam sensing this and therefore holding off a bit.  It's very real and I can't wait to see it all sort of come to a head!  More, soon, please :) 



Author's Response:

Hey you!  Glad you enjoyed the first time scenario -- I wanted there to be a little bit of...restraint there, simply because the premise of this story rests on my belief that Jim's seeming epiphany in the stairwell (and the kiss that followed it) are what led to him finally letting down all the walls with Pam.  I do think he was a tad reticient with her prior to that point (and who could blame him, really). 

Thanks so much, as always, for reviewing!

Reviewer: kaystar Signed 8 [Report This]
Date: November 11, 2007 08:55 pm Title: Chapter 1: Breathe in, breathe out tell me all of your doubt and everybody bleeds this way just the same

I like the way you're moving between current and flashbacks. I got so caught up in the S3 angst that I forgot all the angst that Jim went through in S1/2.  Thanks for helping me remember. 

Reviewer: JennInTheCity Signed [Report This]
Date: November 11, 2007 07:41 pm Title: Chapter 2: hold on hold tight make it through another night every day there comes a song with the dawn

Crap - you just reminded me I left a load of laundry in the dryer that needs to be folded. Guess I know what I'm doing once I finish this.

Really excellent job. You have a way of delving into Jim's bruised and slightly out of control psyche at that point in late season two, without making him too overly dramatic.

The last scene was fabulous. Really great work as always!

Author's Response:

Hee -- sorry about the laundry reminder!  (Though if it's any consolation, I've got a load -- the third I've done today -- in the dryer.  And I always feel incredibly resentful at that damned buzzer when it goes off, LOL.)

So glad to hear you say that my Jim comes off as bruised / out of control without being overdramatic -- so relieved, actually, to hear you say that, because I think in a lot of my earlier fics, I was *definitely* guilty of melodrama, particularly when it came to Jim (and still am, to some degree).  So it's good to hear that you found it believable.  :o)

Thanks, as always, for the review!

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