Date: November 20, 2017 02:38 pm Title: here's where the story ends
Ding, ding, ding, ding!
The reading on the Authenticityometer is One Hundred Percent.
The reading on the Delicious/Mushometer is also One Hundred Percent.
The reading on the TenderHeartometer, One Hundred Percent as well.
Sigh. Love. Love.
Date: September 09, 2010 11:23 pm Title: here's where the story ends
You already know I love this, but it's worth telling you again. It's so great to have something new from you. And I'm really glad you were feeling inspired enough to finish it!
As I've mentioned, my favorite part of this is their lovely slow dance, just exquisite torture. But there's a lot here to love. You keep it so real and true to the characters. I could hear their voices in my head as I was reading. The tone and the outcome were just perfect.
Great, great work, my dear Callisto!
Author's Response: Thanks so much, miss Blanca. I appreciate your taking the time to review--I know you've got other things on your mind about now. ;) Thank you again for being there and helping me kick around ideas for how to approach this. You gals make fanfic writing fun. And possible. :)
Date: September 09, 2010 02:57 pm Title: here's where the story ends
Ah, so many things to love!
- Love that Karen is irritated with Jim about the beer even though she said she'd have whatever he was having. I like to think he knew what she wanted and ordered the beer just to torque her in retaliation for playing with the Crackberry at the reception!
- Love the irony that Roy gets to glimpse Pam dancing with Jim during the song he paid for.
- I like that you don't have Jim run after Pam right away when she rushes from the room. I think it's both realistic and torturous to have him stuck for another two dances with Kelly and Karen.
- Just lovely phrasing. For some reason, I really liked this sentence: Both of his brothers had been married in grand style, in beautifully decked-out churches with receptions full of free booze and pretty, flirtatious girls in colorful silky dresses.
Nice to have you back on the boards!
Author's Response: Hey, VB! Thanks so much. I love that line that you picked out--it's one of my favorites, too. I love working within episodes to keep it feeling like something that might have really happened. The Blackberry thing, from that deleted scene, just seemed such a perfect little snapshot of the slight rift they always had between them. And did we ever know if Jim knew Phyllis just lifted Pam's wedding ideas? It seemed to me that might make a difference in how he saw her that day. Anyway, thanks for the review. I'm glad you liked it. :)
Date: September 09, 2010 01:37 pm Title: here's where the story ends
I'm so glad you completed this story. I know you've been tinkering with an idea for a while, and I'm happy to be able to finally read it. So many times during S3 you think that everything could have been different if just one thing changed--and you wrote a great AU that feels very true to the show and the characters that accomplishes that.
I adore the way you wrote the subtle distance between Karen and Jim as well as the undeniable connection between Jim and Pam.
Hope to see more writing from you soon!
Author's Response: It's funny, isn't it, how so many opportunities were missed if only one thing were changed. A couple dozen fanfics could be written exploring all the times that one conversation could've made all the difference. Thanks for hashing this out with me in so many discussions! You know I couldn't have done it without you gals. :)
Date: September 09, 2010 12:30 pm Title: here's where the story ends
I love this. You know, I always thought that PW was so sad b/c Jim was like *thisclose* to getting it, and then it broke all of our hearts all over again. I've read a few AU's of PW, but this by far is the best I've read, and most realistic, and most what I would LOVE to have seen happen. I always love your take on their relationship, whatever the situation and this one is no different. So glad to see something new from you :)
Author's Response: I totally agree, kells. That look Pam gives him is just so haunting... it was definitely a missed opportunity, and such a huge one! I love finding scenarios where one conversation would have made all the difference and this one just screams "Go talk to her!" Although, that was the hardest conversation I've ever tried to write for these two. Talk about your stammering uh's and um's. I'm glad you liked it and it seemed realistic. Thank you for the review!
Date: September 09, 2010 12:29 am Title: here's where the story ends
Reading this gave me a lump in the back of my throat. It's pretty much perfect.
Author's Response: Thank you, Monotreme. I appreciate that. Glad you enjoyed-- thanks for letting me know. :)
Date: September 08, 2010 08:56 pm Title: here's where the story ends
Oh my goodness, I have never read such a perfect Phyllis' Wedding story! It was just so... happy! Brilliant writing, very clear, descriptive, especially with the dialogue. I loved the last conversation, and the description of Roy seeing them and walking away. Wonderful job, it was beautiful!
Author's Response: Thanks, pmh. That was not an easy conversation to write, full of ellipses and 'um' pauses. Glad you liked how it turned out. Thanks for letting me know! :)
Date: September 08, 2010 12:57 pm Title: here's where the story ends
Ooh, I love that while this is AU, it just gives a springboard, not necessarily hot monkey love in the broom closet. (Although those are fun, too).
I can totally see Karen addicted to the Crackberry. So in character all around, Callisto. Nicely done.
Author's Response: Thanks, lisa. I could add to it, I suppose, but I like just leaving it here. :) Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for letting me know!
Date: September 08, 2010 12:20 pm Title: here's where the story ends
This is about a million times better than that episode, which to this day I still cannot watch at all. I loved everything about this chapter so much. I love how easy you made it, all he really needed to do was react to her expression as he danced with Karen. My only complaint is that it's marked complete! I hope you're inspired to continue this. Please?
Author's Response: This is a really hard episode to watch, for so many reasons. But yeah--I think that one moment was yet another critical lost opportunity. There were so many of them! I'm glad you liked it enough to want more, but I am going to leave it where it is. :) Thanks for reviewing!
Date: September 08, 2010 11:31 am Title: here's where the story ends
Isn't this a sight for sore eyes? I love stories that fit effortlessly within or between episodes - that reinvent them while remaining true to their spirit. Not an easy thing to do - and you do it SO well here. Especially like how you flesh out the events of PW (Karen with her Blackberry, hee!) and seamlessly leap frog to the actual season's resolution, recasting it in wedding, instead of beach, mode: Pam's bravery in admitting her feelings, her I wish you would, Jim needing a little time to sort out his heart/mind (not to mention his Karen situation) in the wake of her overwhelming revelation. You re-weave it all together so poignantly...it feels just right. Great dialogue, and little character bits (Kelly/Ryan ;-) - all captured succinctly, without histrionics or protracted 'plot' complications.
Okay. I'll stop. Can you tell I liked this?
Author's Response: I've always loved that one deleted scene where Karen is all over her BlackBerry and Jim looks so visibly annoyed. It's just one more piece of evidence for how they're not right for each other. Anyway I've been kicking this idea around for a while as one of my many 'what if one thing had changed' AU scenarios. I was a little worried about using that line from Beach Games so I'm glad it didn't seem too cheesy. :) (I'm always loathe to use much dialogue straight from an episode.) So glad you liked this! Thanks for the review.
Date: September 08, 2010 10:45 am Title: here's where the story ends
BRAVO!!! All these two kids needed was a nudge in the right direction. You executed that very well. Thank you very much for totally entertaining me during my lunch hour.
Author's Response: Thank you Vitamin-D! That's my thought as well. Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for letting me know!
Date: September 08, 2010 10:16 am Title: here's where the story ends
I haven't had time to really read any updates lately, but while I was here I read this one quickly. I can't watch this episode and enjoy it, really, except if I'm watching it for moments like Michael jumping up to catch a glimpse or something. But anyway. Lady, please update this soon. This was great. It's a nice treat when the dialogue and description meets perfectly for the character (the way Pam's "hi" is whispered and cracked, and the way she smiles and frowns at the same time). It all came together really well, the picture was already in my head before I put it together consciously.
Also, I'm glad they didn't kiss in the hallway. I like when Jim is faithful to Karen in stories. Keep up the great work, and seriously -- please post the next chapter soon! You're killing me.
Author's Response: Sorry about that yanana-- forgot to mark it complete. I do want to just leave it here. I like the idea of leaving it at their starting point. :) Like you I do not care for this episode much; just too much angst, heartbreak, and Michael at his cringeworthy worst. But that look Pam gives him on the dance floor has always seemed like one of the ultimate lost opportunities and one of the best places to try an AU. Glad you liked it. Thanks for reviewing!