10 [Report This]Date: December 03, 2011 02:20 pm Title: Chapter 1
Picturing Jim holding little Cece in his arms bought tears to my eyes! very well done.
Author's Response: Aww... I hope they were happy tears! Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Date: December 02, 2011 09:44 pm Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
Wanted you to know I'm still with the story. I can tell you first hand the flight from Australia is brutally long. And that was without the stress of going home to meet my child and estranged partner! I'm really glad that if nothing else Jim got to see and hold his child. So if you're really going to mess with my head and split them up I've still got this chapter to hang my hat on :)
Author's Response: Thanks you VERY much for telling me you're still with me on this roller coaster ride. You've been to Australia? How was it? I ALWAYS wanted to go there!But I can't imagine traveling for that many hours! I've been in a 9 hr flight, but then again it's not the 14+ hours coming from Australia and of course, taking connecting flights. Yikes! I'm glad you liked this chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Date: December 02, 2011 08:57 am Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
I was so happy to see this posted! I've been checking constantly for an update. (I'm a nudger what can I say lol) This was... I am so proud of Jim for standing up to his father, and that it looks like it may not be too late for him to be in Cece's life. When he picked up Cece for the first time, I could literally see it happening and I loved every second of it. I could feel Pam's nervousness when Jim picked up the car seat, still afraid that he's going to take her baby away.
I so appreciate that in this AU, Jim's love is still so strong for Pam that even after 9 months apart, he's still completely in love with her. I love that he's going to be a better father than his father ever was (I'm assuming he will be... of course he will be!) And I wonder if Gerry did this to his other sons too, being over protective and getting PI's involved. I know this is going to sound mean and but I hope Jim doesn't forgive his father. What Gerry did was terrible.
I'm so anxious about the next chapter, it's not clear cut if they'll get together or if Pam can't trust him anymore and they'll be splitting time with Cece and move on with other people. Looking forward to more!
Author's Response: Lady, I wasn't going to post it until monday. I have this thing where I read it over, and over, and over, and.. you get the point...But your review "*taps fingernails on desk* Patiently awaiting an update..." was what made me post it and I'm so glad I did it! The Gerry and Jim scene took me a while. I wrote down everything I wanted Jim to say and just getting the "flow" of everything was hard. Only because I wanted to convey the fact that Jim had planned this conversation. He knew what he was going to say, regardless of his father's reaction.
I'm the Jim/Cece scene worked out and what was in my head actually translated into the paper. I'm sooo glad you got Pam's nervousness, like, I wanted to convey the feeling, but I didn't want to overwhelm the reader with Pam's fears. I'm glad that wasn't a negative aspect.
You betcha that in my stories Jim will ALWAYS love Pam, after 9, 10, 342,545 months... doesn't mater. The reason being that, this is already and AU, and the only thing that keeps this about Jim and Pam and not Joe and Cindy, is the love they have for each other. Do you know what I mean? Next chapter is coming soon... Just working a few kinks... Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Date: December 02, 2011 07:48 am Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
If your fic was a man, I'd marry it ;)
Damn, that was so freaking good, I don't even know where to start. I loved the conversation between Jim and Gerry. Jim put him in his place and he bloody deserved it. This was awesome....
“I almost lost my child. Now feel what it’s like to lose yours.”
I was like, YES!!! in your face, Gerry! lol.
Jim finally holding Cece was so beautiful, and I pictured the scene so perfectly in my head.
Love it.
Author's Response: "If your fic was a man, I'd marry it." HAHAHA! I love it! My response to that... "If you like it, then you should put a ring on it..."
I'm so glad you are liking this story, still. After ALL the angst. I'm so glad you said you could picture the Jim holding Cece scene. That was the first scene I wrote for that chapter (I wanted to write it before all the Gerry/Jim stuff - I wanted to be in a good place when wrote it). I'm glad you could see it! Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Date: December 02, 2011 07:38 am Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
Serves Gerry right. He almost destroyed a potentially great family. I sense a serious loving discussion coming up. Do continue.
Author's Response: Gerry got what he deserved, right? The "serious loving discussion" is definitely coming up. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
10 [Report This]Date: December 01, 2011 09:15 pm Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
I cried when Jim got to hold the baby. So beautiful.
Author's Response: Oh man! I hope it was a good cry! Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Date: December 01, 2011 08:29 pm Title: Chapter 13 - Part one
So I've been waiting to see how you would handle that inevitable confrontation between Jim and his father, and this was great. As for the rest... so, so sweet! I love the image of him holding the baby and getting a really good look at her for the first time. Nice job :)
Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked how I handled Jim and his father's "talk." It took me a while to get all the pieces that I wanted Jim to say to his father in a logical "flowing" order. Jim holding Cece was the first scene I wrote on that chapter. I'm so glad you liked how that played out. Thanks for reviewing!
10 [Report This]Date: December 01, 2011 10:35 am Title: Chapter 12
I love this story, thank you for keeping us updated as often as you are. Really enjoying where you're going with it.
Date: December 01, 2011 08:16 am Title: Chapter 1
*taps fingernails on desk* Patiently awaiting an update...
10 [Report This]Date: November 29, 2011 10:09 pm Title: Chapter 12
Oh, I love this story. Thank you for Jim not walking in and misinterpreting a Roy/Pam moment. I was nervous to read this chapter, but I should have trusted you.
I hope Jim is honest and Pam is honest (about the deceit to Adele) in the next chapter. I trust you. I trust you. I trust you. ??? :)
Date: November 28, 2011 10:29 am Title: Chapter 12
WOW!!! Just the moment I have been wanting so desperstely, waiting for so impatiently and praying for with guarded hope ever since Pam told Jim she wasn't pregnant and then disappeared back in chapter three. You certainly did not disappoint. This was in a word, A-MAZ-ING!!!!
I have to say, I just couldn't see how you could pull off this first time they saw each other again without there being any conflict and without there being anger, accusations and raised voices. I also wondered, especially when it stated that Jim was headed for his parent's house, just how daddy dear was going to be stopped from interferring with the reunion. You,,, I mean... well... are you magic? How in the world did you come up with what is probably THE ONLY way that this could have happened without the things I mentioned happening?! I mean, dad being out of town is so great and the fact that it is only until that evening, well, that makes it PERFECT because I am absolutely CERTAIN that Jim has a thing or two that he would like to 'discuss' with his father (I'm thinking the phrases 'die a painful, miserable, lonely death' and 'I hope you rot in hell' should be used. ) and I don't think Jim is going to want to wait for the 'discussion' with Gerry. So the next obstacle is Jim needing to find out where Pam lives and a way he can not only go there but also get her to see him. SO SO perfect that Betsy happens to be on her way out to go visit at that very moment and I had to laugh a bit. His mom seems in so many way oblivious to many things. Like her talking to Jim on the phone in Australia all about a shower for someone that is as far as Jim knows a stranger and his mom doesn't notice he has zero interest. Then Jim calls, I am sure on the edge of hysteria asking all sorts of questions about this girl and the baby, mom doesn't notice he is upset or how unusual it is for Jim to be THAT interested or want so many details about a girl he doesn't know and her baby. So, it stands to reason that when Jim shows up, exhausted from a long flight she doesn't notice that she not only NOT cancel her plans but INSISTS that she keeps them and then in a move that I am absolutely certain should have raised a mega sized red flag making Betsy ask what's going on, Jim insists on going along to these people's house who are complete strangers to him, and again mom notices nothing. I have to wonder if Betsy, because of all the years she has lived with and had to deal with Gerry who I am sure is an insensitive clod, I wonder if because of that she has trained herself to not notice things, just be willfully oblivious.
Anyhow, you just wrote EVERYTHING about the scene at the Anderson house so perfectly. You know, when Adele says she was just on her way to go check on 'my Cecilia' I couldn't help but react with one of my gut instincts, thinking, 'hey, NOT YOUR Cecelia! Funny, I didn't even notice until I read through it the second time that Jim actually reacted that way. Who can blame him? He now knows in his heart that this woman is NOT in fact biologiacally related to the baby, but I have to believe it hurts for him to know that she not only 'knows' his baby whe he, himself, doesn't, but she is also close enough to her to feel at ease using the term 'my Cecilia.' My heart really broke for Jim thinking about this. It made me once again think about just how much Jim's dad has stolen from Jim, and Pam, and actually from Cecilia too and I am convinced all over again of just how totally evil that man is. All I can figure is that he must have made a deal with the devil at some point and sold him his very soul somewhere along the way. He so obviosly is lacking some basic human emotions like caring, compassion, empathy and certainly he doesn't have that, whatever it is that we get when we become parente, it forces us to want nothing but sheer ahppiness for our kids and makes us willing to do what it takes to get that for them. In Gerry it seems like THOSE feelings and emotions are reserved for his money.
Anyow, getting back to inside the Anderson house... you set this up so nicely... actually, rather than nicely I would say PERFECTLY! Having Pam out of the house taking a walk, at first I didn't think anything of it but then in thinking over the chapter I realized that it was just the most perfect move for two reasons. First and I didn't realize I would feel do strong about this but Jim needed to be able to see and look at the baby all alone when he saw her for the first time. That first meeting I feel helps set up his emotions and feelings for the baby and he needed it to be quiet and peaceful. It needed to happen without the drama that I am sure is coming and without accusations, even if those accusations are only in a person's eyes or body language. Having Jim seperate hiself from the others by asking for the bathroom was brilliant. I think he was probably hoping to bump into Pam or something so that when he saw her again for the first time it wouldn't be in front of an audience. So, excusing himself to go and even just think about how he wanted to handle things was really smart. I adore that as Jim left the bathroom, even though he had been apart from Pam for solong at this point, he still recognised and reacted to her smell immediately. It felt to me like even though he had no business opening doors in someone else's house, this was PAM's smell and he needed to be were it was, immerse himself in her smell and probably some thoughts/memories of her before actually confronting the reality of it all head on. It was all just so perfect how you have him entering the room, remembering her smell and then first just realizing there was something new added to her smell and realing it was the addition of the baby and right after that realizing that he notices the crib and it just seems to hit him that the baby, HIS baby, is right there, right in that bed. I don't think he could help himself at this point even if he wanted to. He just NEEDS to see his daughter, see that she is, in fact, real. I can just see it all so clearly in my mind, him standing at the crib, reaching out to run his hand over her cheek because he neeeded to feel that she was real and then standing there staring at her, fighting back tears, probably for all he had done and all he had missed and also probably because he is afraid of how Pam is going to react to him and doesn't know if she'll even let him be partof their daughter's life. But even more sad to me is Jim staring, afraid the baby will disappear if he looks away.
Then finally...FINALLY, our wonderful couple see each other again. How confusing for Pam to open her bedroom door and there he is much like I would imagine she had dreamed he would be, many, MANY times. He's in her room, looking at their baby. I like that in her surprise she says 'Oh my God!' I assume that is a callback to the phone call in the initiation, right? Again, I can picture her losing her grip on the water and it rolling away even as she struggles with believing he really is there much the same way he had struggled moments ago. Of course at that point her she remembers her fears and the terror kicks into high gear. She already had a large fear of losing her child to his family but then Roy had mentioned it I think last chapter and I have a feeling that seeing that this fear was something that was very alive and active inside Pam, I would imagine Roy would have decided to use it to his advantage. I can see him suggesting things about Pam losing Cecelia to the father should he ever find out and also saying just how angry the dad will be that Pam kept the baby from him, Roy doing this all in the interest of breaking through Pam's defenses and getting her to marry him. If he can't get her to actually feel something for him, well, he'll do it through fear if that's the only way he can. I think he wants to make sure that she never decides she wants Cece's dad involved in her life. I can see him suggesting to Pam that if she marries him and allows him to be Cece's daddy, then he will be able to protect her... to protect both of them.
I can understand Pam not wanting to have that discussion there at the Anderson house. At the same time, I wish it HAD happened right then, on the spot because with her being surprised and stuff she didn't have time to build up her defenses. I think she would have truly had a discussion from her heart. I worry about there being time for her to think. I also have a small worry that she's going to show up at Jim's hotel with Roy. PLEASE let me be wrong. I want VERY much to be wrong. I LOVED that when Jim really looked Pam in the face, because he knows her so well he was able to see that the terror in her face. I ADORE what he did, moving to her, using his hands to gently frame her face as he whispers and asks her what she's afraid of. I like that Pam maked it clear to him that her fear is having Cece taken from her which should help Jim really understand why she took off and never told him about their child to begin with. I have to admit, the single tear rolling down his cheek as he asked, she's mine, isn't she? threatened to break my heart! The way all she could do is nod, all the sorrow and fear and such they are expressing makes it so clear that all the hurt, all the pain they have heaped on each other not to mention the torture of being apart, of Jim not being there for such important things and Pam having to go through them without the love of her life, it all just starts adding up and you can only hope that through this they will each see all the mistakes that they themselves have made in order to protect themselves. Hopefully they'll each see that in being so in love they made the fatal mistake of retreating from each other when things were shaken up and their worlds became unsteady because of Jim's dad. I hope they'll be able see through the muddy waters here and see that they should have come together and talked this all out, that's what people in love do. Instead they tried to outrun the hurt and they both learned that outrunning it simply wasn't possible. It kept up with them the entire time.
I just wanted to be able to take Jim in MY arms and comfort him because my heart broke when he said 'a daughter' and then thought... my little girl. So sweet... and heartbreaking for a guy who is just dinding out he has a child who he was denied knowing of her existence. The way you described his reaction, it's like Pam actually acknowledging it, even though he really already knew it, when it came from her it seemed to break him a bit. I think in part because he KNOWS that she did the only thing she could in getting away from him after how he reacted when she originally told him she was pregnant. He knows that he did this to himself really (well, actually his dad did it to him but he allowed what his dad told him to affect his behavior and the way he treated the woman he is in love with.) and I think THAT is what broke him... caused him to go limp. I'm glad they got a few things out.. him asking her why she lied, I think he kinda knew in his heart or at least knew that his behavior had really scared her. Anyhow, I'm glad that she was honest and told him that she was scared that he would take her. I like his reaction... I imagined him being somewhat baffled when he asked 'why would I do that?'
I ADORE how you wrote the next part... how when Cece started to cry Jim was immediately concerned and I could really picture him standing there with Pam, his big hand covering Cece's back and I really enjoyed knowing that Cece was getting to know the gentle touch and the dound of her daddy, someone who I KNOW is going to become SO important in her life! I love how in that moment with them standing there together, Jim with his hand moving on her back, they began the healing process. It's so very Jim that he is concerned first that nothing is wrong as far as why she was currently crying but then went on to inquire in general, he wanted to make certain that his baby girl was okay. Once he knew the baby was okay, he needed to know that Pam was okay as well. Then of course he needed to inquire as to the finger and toe count like all new parents so. LOVE Pam saying about al 12 toes because if she can be lighthearted, then they have real hope and the healing has begun.
I felt so sad for Jim when Roy came home and Pam began insisting he had to go. I was really sad for him when he said he wasn't leaving because he wasn't willing to risk losing her again. :o( I am really REALLY glad that he feels so very strongly about telling her everything. Thing is, I think he'll be surprised that he has things to learn, like how long is dad has known just where Pam is and that his Parents went to his daughter's baby sower, he didn't get to and even worse, they saw Cece fairly soon after her birth. I am really very anxious to see how that conversation goes. I was really glad to find out that Jim is not staying at his family's home but rather in a hotel. That made me happy because I have a feeling that it has EVERYTHING to do with the fact that he has pieced together all of his father's strange behavior and knows now that his dad totally played him and that his dad denied him the experience of seeing his daughter born all because his dad has ridiculous standards and want Jim to marry a high class snobby plastic woman. He decided sight unseen, never having met Pam that she wasn't good enough for Pam and the family. Anyhow, I have a feeling that his family will be very upset when they find out that Jim is staying at a hotel but good for Jim. How absolutely awful am I that I'm hoping that after Jim and Pam talk and argue, accuse, cry, scream and makeup... next they will fall into bed and make things all better or at least start to get better. I think Jim and Pam communicate best that way. What??? Why are you looking at me strangely??? Nothing wrong with hoping my favorite couple can make each other feel better than either has felt in 9 or so months!
I love Pam assuring Jim that she isn't going anywhere and after hesitating about meeting him at his hotel, a look at their baby's hand grasping her daddy's finger seemed to melt her a bit and se agreed to it. WHen he dipped his head telling her again that he needs to tell her everything I was SO hoping for a steamy kiss, I don't think there's a chance Pam would have resisted. My heart hurt some again when he said 'don't leave, okay?' Then I again melted when he bent and cruched a kiss to Cece's closed fist and told Pam he's be waiting.
So I'm wondering if some stuff with Roy is going to come into play. I think Jim has made it clear tat he doesn't have any intentions of taking Cece from Pama and also I thought it was pretty clear that while Jim is hurting badly over all of this, he doesn't seem to be angry at Pam. Given that and the fact that it was clear, even to Pam I'm sure, that she is still madly in Love with Jim. He is the love of her life and well,she doesn't need Roy. She doesn't need protected from Jim (though I BET Roy will try to convince her Jim was lting or something) and she certainly doesn't need love from Roy. I think it was very apparent that Jim is still deeply in love with her and I think not onl could she see his regrets in his face, she also could hear them each time he said he wanted to tell her everything. I think when she hears what Jim has to say, she will very much wish he had talked to and trusted her and she'll be upset over some things like him lying about his parent's being dead and his last name BUT,Pam is understanding and compassionate with everyone, Jim won't be an exception. Actually, I think she will really hurt for that hurting man inside him that thought that he had no other option but to run away. Actually she should be able to relate to that!
I mean... just.... WOWWWWW!!! You just so constantly amaze and blow me away! This story is so unique and painful yet has the possibility poking through now that it could become very very happy!
How you continue to be so brilliant chapter after chapter, story after story... I'll never know. I guess we're just really lucky!
Now... patience isn't a virtue of mine and I am crazy expectant about these next few chapters so I want them like, ummm... NOW! What are you doing reading when you should be busy writing??? HUH??
Seriously though... you rock!
*Hugs* T~
Date: November 28, 2011 08:17 am Title: Chapter 12
That was intense. I like how you brought Jim and Pam together, Dedeen. I'm glad there wasn't a shouting match. This was tender and sweet. %#*^! Roy :(
Date: November 27, 2011 06:17 pm Title: Chapter 12
You make me so happy. I really do love how you know how to keep up on the edge of our seat. I have never finished a chapter thinking without thinking, "omg what is going to happen?"
I'm SO happy she's admitted the baby is his and that she has agreed to meet him. Just, Roy, please do not ruin this for them LOL.
I hope she lets him explain everything :(
Date: November 27, 2011 05:50 pm Title: Chapter 12
Wow again! The moment he saw Cece I almost gasped along with him! I love how the conversation at the end is done, it's not all over the place but it's not even either, it completely shows how caught by surprise they both are, even though Jim knew what he was walking into and seeing he still couldn't really pull it together in his head. I'm actually really glad that Pam didn't catch him holding Cece because she would have freaked out, but I did want him to hold her at the same time. I can't wait for that moment. I can't wait for the next update! So much to love about this chapter, intense, it moved so fast and held so much tension! Loving it! More please!
Date: November 22, 2011 11:13 pm Title: Chapter 11
God that must have been such an earth shatterer for Jim. I can't wait to have Pam and Jim meet up again and for Jim to hold the baby he thought didn't exist.
Author's Response: You won't have to wait long for them to meet up - Next chapter. Coming soon! Thanks for reading!
Date: November 21, 2011 08:45 pm Title: Chapter 11
Oh wow... I really really worried after the last chapter. It truly hurt and I just didn't know if I'd really be able to make a comeback and get back into the story or not. I should not have questioned your ability to get me back into things. I LOVE that in an email where Jim's mom writes all about family and shares pictures of the grandkids she inknowingly shares pictures of ALL of her grandchildren. It's interesting how on the day Jim is finally feeling right with the world again, this email arrives, the very thing that has has the ability and in fact will (I think) start Jim on the road to righting his world when he didn't even know just how upside down it was. I'm glad that Jim called his mom who it seems really likes to chatter on rather than calling his dad who I suspecr as Jim thinks this through, which he will have LOTS of time to do while on a plane from Australia, I think he's going to know that his dad HAS to know just who Pam is. I mean, daddy knew all about Pam back in Scranton, I think Jim would know his dad well enough to know first that his dad would have known just what Pam looks like and second that his dad's questions about Pam when Jim was in Stamford and Gerry's actions in dismissing him from Thanksgiving and Christmas with the family, the family Christmas party, giving him tickets to Australia and not only encouraging him to stay away from home in Philly but also encouraging his staying in Australia, going to school for something his dad would generally object to, I have a feeling that on his plane ride home, all of this is going to slide into place for Jim and he's going to realize that while he was feeling proud of himself for getting his dad to back off and finally let Jim be his own person, his dad was sitting smugly by KNOWING that he was denying his son something that would mean absolutely everything to him. I also think that while Jim is probably going to go through some anger at Pam for this, the plane ride is long enough for him to realie that he MADE her run. I have to believe that he will think back and remember saying phrases like 'my family will take care of the baby' and he will realize how scary that would be for Pam. Combine that with the fact that when she told him about the baby he accused her of being a horrible person, he in fact became someone Pam had never seen and didn't know, well, he has to understand her reasons for running. He should also realize that had he thought about things, he maybe should have realized sooner that if Pam were going to run away from her life and everything she knew, she would have needed to have a reason other than just their breakup. I would also think Jim will go through some guilt thinking about how he was out being the Karen's boyfriend, meeting the folks and sharing a holiday and then the world traveler and carefree bachelor/student in Australia and all the time he really had one goal in mind, forget all about Pam. While he was doing this Pam was going through, well, he has no idea what, but he's sure she went through plenty with the pregnancy and being alone, without the father of her baby. (BTW, I LOVE that especially upon hearing the name of the baby he KNEW, without a doubt that this was in fact his daughter. I also love that he printed the picture out to bring with him on his journey back to Pam and to meet his baby. I am sure he is soaking in the picture of his first child but I have to believe that seeing even a picture of Pam after trying in vain to live his life for so many months without her has to be for him like being in the dessert for a long time and finally getting a drink of water. It made me smile. :o) ) Not only would these be things that I believe Jim would be beating himself up for but also, he put Pam in a situation that he has NO idea if she changed her mind and tried to find him. Maybe she wanted him there for part of it, at least the birth but oh yeah, she couldn't have possibly done anything about it because the information she had about him was lies, for goodness sakes, had she at least known his last name she ould have connected it to the fat that these very rich people with the last name of Halpert who are there in Philly, could at very least be related. Could have been a starting point. I just thought of something, I wonder if Pam ever put this together. I'm pretty sure that you said that Jim told her that his Grandma Marie raised them after his parents DIED. Well then the night that everything went to hell he told her that his dad had shown up and told him all this stuff about her. Wonder if she ever conneted that lie and wondered further what other lies he may have told? Anyhow, his whole family background that he told her was lies with the apparent one truth being about his Grandma Marie. Oh and I also have to believe that the fact that he knows that she named the baby after her grandma and his would give him a lot of hope that she is still thinking about him, hopefully still has some kind of feelings for him and that she at very least wanted him to be somewhere in their daughter's life. The other ways that Jim made it impossible for Pam to ome back to or find him was first initially leaving Scranton. I would guess that she could have found out about the transfer pretty easily but then I wonder, I mean, had she called Stamford I'm sure she would have asked for Jim Duncan and been told that there was no one there by that name. (I'm guessing that with his dad being the one to 'send' him to Stamford and Karen who knows him, working there, he would have used his real last name. Maybe I'm wrong, just a guess. Had she pursued it a bit I'm sure she could have found the Jim that transfered from Scranton not long ago but who would have thought of that? Then finally, he got rid of the cell that she knew the number for. At last she had absolutely no way to be able to track him down. I think Jim is going to be swinging back and forth between three emotions on the plane ride home... the love that has surged through him stronger than ever for Pam, and the brand new love that I'm sure he is already feeling at least some for the daughter that he blocked himself from being ablt to know about, guilt about all the things he did and lies he told to Pam and raging Anger at his father, and really anger at himself too but I'm sure that he'll realize that his father started the chain of events that seperated him from Pam and then he made sure that it kept going.
On the other side of the globe I have to say I was startled to learn that Roy is STILL trying to worm his way in and Pam seems to continue to give him openings. I kinda wanted to shake her because NO, having a newborn is NOT easy and it's extremely exhausting but Roy has already voiced that he wants to be more than a 'fun uncle' to the baby, you just can't let someone like that have all these openings because they WILL take them. I was really very happy when Pam came to the decision that she simply is not going to bring Cece into a lie that she created. I can see how having that sweet baby there would bring out the best, the very maternal side of Pam and that she would not want her daughter caught up in something that simply isn't true. I'm also glad that she said to Roy about Cee's dad not being deceased. You know, Roy really, he likes to prade around as the good guy but when Pam isn't giving him what he wants and especially if he even thinks she is thinking about the guy he no doubt knows that she still loves, he doesn't mind playing dirty. Like back a few chapters when he said 'he's never coming back' in spite of the fact that he simply doesn't know the story. He doesn't know Jim. Then this chapter he used her very own fears against her. Fears that she shared only because she was feeling vulnerable and he just had to say 'what do you think he'll do when he finds you've been hiding her away? He'll take her from you.' The thing is, when Pam had fears about the baby being taken from her, I think it wasn't that Jim would take the baby away but that his family would. I think Pam knows and has had time to start to understand even better that Jim loves her and that he wouldn't take the baby away because he would be right there with her raising their daughter. Roy just has no idea the kind of love that he's up against here and he's so much better off that Pam is rebuffing his attempts because otherwise when Jim comes back they love each other so much that Roy would become collateral damage just like Karen. I just read Roy's words again, and they make me really angry. They awe Pam. She would not have went into this scheme except she was told that it would kill Adele to learn that the truth that Adele had made up in her own mind, was not the truth at all. Yes, they took care of her but she also let herself be subjected to things she really didn't want and also, she probably would have actually looked for Jim at some point earlier if not for her involvement with the Anderson family. She has made Adele happy enough that her cancer is now in remission, they owe Pam a debt and not the other way around. For Roy to say, you're going to take Cece from us now just like you took her from him, is OUTRAGEOUS! I mean, how dare he!! To start with, they have no claim on Pam or that baby. Her stay at their house was only ever supposed to be temporary. I just keep thinking, how dare he over and over. Hate to tell you Roy but Jim is on his way and I don't think it will take long AT ALL for him to mend those fences and have Pam and their baby with him. She's not yours Roy. Neither of them are.
Ahhhhhh... I feel like I can breathe again! This chapter makes me so much happier. (Not that making ME happy matters.) Your writing is superb as always and wow what an imagination!
I really am sorry that I had such a hard time with the last chapter but I am being completely honest in saying that I am SO glad that one is done and it looks like we are SOOOO close to some good stuff. It looks like maybe our wonderful duo may see each other again in the next chapter, I'm absolutely praying that it is so! I really feel like Pam NEEDS to get out of the Anderson house and SOON. They have become too wrapped up in and dependant on her and Cece for their happiness and it's ALL based on a lie. Good things never come from basing things on lies, just ask Jim.
Thanks for an awesome chapter. Again, sorry if I let you down on the last one, I just hope you can try to understand. I am REALLY looking forward to the next chapter(s.) Don't take too long with them PLEASE!!! I need the happiness! Hugs T
Author's Response: I think i tackled most of this review on the emails, right? If I didn't, please let me know and I'll be more than happy to tell you more about it.
10 [Report This]Date: November 21, 2011 07:38 pm Title: Chapter 11
Damn it woman, you need to stop leaving me waiting LOL. Now I wanna know what happens. I love Roy - just not with Pam, but he needs to BACK OFF lol. Jim needs to come back and make this all better. MAKE IT BETTER, okay?
Go, you better be writing :) This is so good, the not knowing what's going to happen is driving me nuts!!
Author's Response: You won't wait for much longer - the next chapter is coming soon, just let me finish this turkey leg, will ya? lol! I think Roy will stick around for a little longer... but not too long. I promise. And I will make this all better ,I promise that too!
10 [Report This]Date: November 21, 2011 07:04 pm Title: Chapter 11
Wow, (do I seriously start every review with that word?) You keep leaving me so enthralled by this story. For Jim's part, the way he found out about the baby was totally epic. I'm so happy he's on a plane! I'm so torn about Pam... I'm happy that she's going to finally tell Adele the truth, but I'm sad that it might hurt Adele in some way.
I have to tell you I wish I could write like this. You're putting this story together so wonderfully, and I seriously check here throughout the day for updates. I can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: It is a compliment to me that you start you reviews with "wow." Seroiusly - no need to get too creative, "wow" works just fine! Don't worry about how Adele will take the news once she finds out. You will see that she's more intuitive than you think. I'm completly blown away that you wish you could write like me. Duuudeee your stories are chocolates! I need them in my life in order for me to function properly! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!
Date: November 21, 2011 06:17 pm Title: Chapter 11
Whew. Things are certainly heating up! Where is this going??? Where, where, where? ::bites nails::
Author's Response: Jim finally knows! Where this is going? Well, Pam has to know thta Jim knows, right? RIGHT? Thats coming, and by coming I mean the next chapter. Stay tuned!
Date: November 21, 2011 03:45 pm Title: Chapter 10
::::sigh:::: I hope you will forgive me but I just don't really have it in me to really review this chapter. It's funny, in my own life it was twenty four and a half years ago that my husband who is my daughter's father (but was not my husband at that point) missed the birth of our first child. That long ago and something like a fan fiction story comes along and not only softens the scar, it reopens the wound. Something like that, because it just was so preventable, it's been a weapon through the years that we have used to hurt each other. I just hate so much Jim and Pam, who are a couple that as silly as it seems, I view as having the ideal relationship, and having something that big and hurtful as part of their relationship just makes me ache. From someone who has experienced this I KNOW, it's not something that goes away, ever. Jim can now never talk with Cece and tell her the story of her birth, how he felt, where he was... I know, I seem silly but I honestly cried a lot through this chapter, it was EXTREMELY painful and I know that whatever wonderful things are waiting for them in the future, it will never really make this okay. I'm sorry if I sound dramatic, this just hit me so hard, I guess that says a lot about your writing. I will say, I hope, REALLY REALLY hope that when Jim's mom said Cecilia Marie Anderson that she was just assuming because there is absolutely no reason for Pam to give that baby the Anderson last name. Actually, I know here in Ohio that with the dad not present and them not having been married she couldn't. I don't know if that's the way it is in every state but here the baby automatially takes the mom's last name unless the dad is there to sign the birth certificate.
Your writing, as always, was excellent. You certainly do know how to tell a story.
I'm going to try to get back with it next chapter. I really really hope you can understand. I'm really sorry. :o(
Date: November 18, 2011 09:50 pm Title: Chapter 10
Sad that Jim couldn't be there. And again so close between Betsy and Pam! Aarrgh! Can't wait to see how the plot continues to develop. Very nice touch with Jim being off by the way.
Author's Response: I Know this was a sad one. There's some really good stuff coming that will make up for Jim not being there. Thanks for reading and reviewing!
10 [Report This]Date: November 18, 2011 03:26 pm Title: Chapter 10
You had soooo better be writing right this second, I mean it. I'll fly to wherever you live to kick your ass in to gear, I'M SERIOUS. This is so good, and it's getting better and better with each chapter.
Is it sad I was upset when they refereed to her as Cecilia Marie ANDERSON? I was like, that's HALPERT TO YOU lol :)
Freaking awesome, god. *happy sigh*
Author's Response: I'm writing, pink swear! Please don't hurt me! Writing "Cecelia Marie Anderson" actually hurt my brain. Funny story, on my first draft I wrote "Halpert" without even knowing... I was reading through before sending to my Beta and I was like, Oh... that's not it! Haha! Thank you for reading and reviewing!
10 [Report This]Date: November 18, 2011 09:07 am Title: Chapter 10
All I can really come up with is WOW. Jim feeling uneasy all the while Pam is giving birth to their child. Gerry and Betsy being there afterward. The last paragraph grabbed at every single heart string I have. I can't tell you how much I'm aching for you to continue this! I need to read the next chapter like, right now!
Author's Response: I had to take the peace Jim felt - he had to feel that something was wrong, a momumentous event was occuring and he needed to be aware that he was missing something, that his world was a tad off centered. I like to think and that Jim is phisically and SPIRITUALLY connected to Pam. Sounds silly, but that's what I like to think. I'm do glad you're liking this one and I Promise the next chapter is coming soon!
10 [Report This]Date: November 17, 2011 01:26 am Title: Chapter 9
WOW! SO each chapter is getting both a bit more frustrating in some respects and a bit easier to take in others.
Oh Jim, Jim, Jim... when are you EVER going to learn two things? 1) running doesn't solve ANYTHING. You ran from your family. You fell in love but because of the circumstances allowed your dad to poison your mind about the person you loved and you lost her. You ran from Scranton to Stamford from Pam to Karen and what did it solve? Not a thing. Your memories went with you and no matter what you did, you simply couldn't outrun those. Now you've run all the way to Australia and you think you've won. You have a nice change of scenery and while studying you are able to at least live with the memories but really Jim, how long are you going to be able to keep it up? THe only way to get the past to stop haunting you is to stop running and face it. Not to mention, you're missing some pretty huge events in your own life while you are doing all this running. The second thing I wonder when you are going to learn is, if what you are doing is making your dad happy, then HE is controlling your life and you are playing into his hands, not the other way around. I mean really Jim? You really think that you are just THE man now and you have somehow let your dad know loud and clear that this is your life and you're living it your way? You've lived close to thirty years now (I'm assuming you have him the same age he was on the show when Cece was born, sorry if I'm wrong. I'm not even certain of his age on the show right now. Around thirty or just over it I think) you've lived THAT long and you STILL don't know your own dad well enough to know when he's the one in control. How very, very sad. I found it interesting but crazy sad in my mind that 1) his parents, unknowingly to his mom, attended their grandchild's baby shower and 2) Jim heard all about his own baby's shower from his mom. Interesting that Gerry is attending these things. I'm guessing that it's all part of him really keeping tabs on Pam but I have to thinkhope when it all comes out and Pam and Jim realizes the rolr that he played and just how disgustingly manipulative he was that they never let him have anything at all to do with this baby. He is costing his son what we all know would be the very happiest time of Jim's life and he's doing it simply because he doesn't feel that Pam is worthy of the Halperts. I hope that in this case, unlike on the show, that his dad never get the chance to wear a kilt to his wedding because I know if he was MY future FIL and he did these disgusting things there is NO freaking way he would be AT my wedding! UGH! I kept wishing during the phone call that Jim's mom would mention Pam's name and maybe how long ago the accident happened and maybe, just maybe that would at least catch Jim's attention at least a little. If he had just a tiny clue I think he would start unraveling his dad's behavior and he's be able to see that from the time his dad showed up in Scranton he has been playing every move he makes right into his dad's hands and he doesn't want to do that! I can't help but wonder just what the fallout is going to be when Jim finds out that his dad has known from pretty early on just where Pam is and chose to hide it from Jim. I mean, the reason, that he doesn't think Pam is good enough rather thab that he is worried about Pam doing what Katy did is pretty obvious since Pam ran away from all that rather than trying to be any part of it. Oh and BTW, very intereting way of working Katy into the story. I don't know why since we didn't know much about her, but I can see her doing that. I saw where you said on the boards where we will know in the next chapter if Jim makes it for the birth... thinking about it is making me a little ill. I'm wondering if I should skip the next chapter??? It's another of those hitting way too close to home things. It looks lkes some wounds must never heal if reading fan fiction stories can open them back up! ACK!!! Anyhow, I don't know if I have ever despised a character in any of the fan fiction stories I have read, quite as much as I despise Jim's father. Men like this, ruthless businessmen that see people as pawns to be bought and sold, they shouldn't be able to have children! Oh wait! I just thought of something else... so Jim wants nothing to do with his family, wants to be his own man, stand on his own two feet but c'mon Jim. You say all of this and then are obviously allowing your family to support you while you are living in Australia and pay for you to get more schooling for something you KNOW your dad finds to be frivolous. None of this gives you pause Jim? I really REALLY hope you're going to get your brain back before you find Pam again. In the state you are right now you are too stupid for Pam and she would have every right to be extremely EXTREMELY angrt with you and decide to date Roy to spite you because lets face it, while she is deaking with pregnancy without her partner, being unconfortable and sad and lonely, you have been in a months long relationship including spening Thanksgiving with and meeting the new girl's parents. THAT would make me REALLY question if you had ever loved me at all. Then you go and start a new life halfway around the world. All the time Pam is dealing with the new life growing inside her and the fact that she can't REALLY run away from you at all because that part of you that is growing inside of her is always reminding her of you. It's really REALLY time to grow up Jim. Time to actually be your own man, like you were in Scranton. Stand on your own two feet rather than having your family support you. You are going to need to somehow let Pam know when you guys meet again that you are not your dad's pawn or anything like your dad and that you are actually worthy of her on your child. I have faith in you Jim but you have a long way to go!
Soooooo Roy is back. I knew the last few chapters being Roy free were simply too good to be true. I just don't even know WHAT to say about his gift to the baby except ummm, inappropriate! But then, he was trying to get a message across and he did. He didn't get the results he wanted, but the message got across. I couldn't help but get really angry at him when he told Pam, he's never cpming back. I mean, he doesn't have any clue what's going to go on. I just think it's pretty crappy to try to move in on her in such a vulnerable condition. On top of that it's while she is indebted to his family though actually, if the situation with Pam and the baby DID actually put Adele into remission, which, that can't REALLY happen, can it? (Color me stupid!) Then they are WAY FAR indebted to Pam rather than the other way around. The thing is, if Adele is in remission, with no apparent end in sight, isn't it time for them to put an end to this charade? I mean, it was done all for Adele's health because they felt the truth would kill her in her fragile condition. I mean, where is the end to this for Pam??? I can certainly understand Pam's feelings about the baby shower. This is all bringing up again for me, where is Pam's mom? We know that she does some kind of traveling based on Jim's memories when he met her but it seems with her daughter pregnant and having a baby shower and such, it just seems like her mom would do whatever it would take to be around at this time. I mean, her mom could maybe extract her from this situation with the Andersons. Anyhow, I can imagine that Pam, being a small town, sweet girl, would be overwhelmed and not entirely welcoming of this type of a baby shower. I mean, when I had my showers I cannot imagine it being just tons of people that I simply didn't know. I imagine a shower like that would make her crave a Micheal Scott shower. I think she would resent being expected to write thank yous to people she just doesn't know. I bet she always imagined a cozy shower with her friends, family, co workers, people that she cares about and that care about her. This makes me just sad for Pam and for what her first experience of becoming a mom has turned into. I have to imagine about now Pam has to be really beginning to long for something familiar. She's right now just really not in her element at all.
Anyhow, sorry I let the shower thoughts intrude on the Roy thoughts, I'm just REALLY so relieved that Pam, even in a vulnerable state, held her ground with Roy, being adamant that she is glad to have him as a friend and that's all. Then again, maybe with that reminder of Jim ever present, she isn't quite as vulnerable as it seems she would be.
You know, it's nice that Adele is giving Pam permission to move on though she doesn't even know the story, doesn't know what price Pam has Pam mentally on Adele's behalf. Interesting how you were able to work that conversation so it worked PERFECT in both the context of Adele speaking about Kenny and Pam speaking about Jim. Of course, what Adele doesn't understand is that it would I am certain be far easier for Pam to move on if Kenny had been the dad. If Pam knew the father was dead and there was no chance at all of things working out, at some point you have no choice but to move on. With Pam, well, she's the one that walked away ad he's out there. She's never tried to contact him and I can see more and more that she really wants to. I like that Pam is realizing how much she wants Jim and how much she is healing. I know that time does heal wounds but I would bet with Pam it's that timy life growing within her getting closer and closer to being born that is doing more of the healing than time is at this point. Anyhow, I love her thought about if Jim walked through her bedroom door the hurt he caused would not surpass her happiness to have him back. I hope she does have him back and I sncerely hope it happens really soon. They have each suffered too much at his dad's hands and I want to see them come back together, a united front and stand up to the bully!
Another solid chapter. Oh and no matter where you got that line in the last chapter, you put it to BRILLIANT use. It was really awesome and the way you used it was perfect. I'm glad you saved it and used it here. I had a favorite line this time too, not as much as the last one but I really liked it...
Aren’t babies such a nice way to start people?
That was really nice and I liked Pam thinking it while thinking about their baby. I'll be honest, I'm either REALLY looking forward to or REALLY REALLY dreading the next chapter. Do you know how awful it is to just not know which? I admit, I'm looking forward to getting to some fluff here perhaps more than I've ever looked forward to it in a fan fic story. Certainly more than I ever have for a WIP that I've had to wait VERY paitently to get to it. It really is a testament to your skill as a writer that this story honestly has drained me emotionally in many chapters, yet I have continued to come back. You have gotten me so invested in the characters and the outcome that I just have this compulsive need to see it through. Really says a lot for your talent.
Thanks again for sharing!
Author's Response: Our little JIm is never going to learn... But he will soon enough. I promise. Your whole Jim/Pam analysis is very accurate. Jim doens't know that he is only falilng into another trap his dad had set up for him. Gerry is such an evil character, but he will get what he deserves. A little spolier - Jim/ Gerry confrontation chapter is by far my favorite chapter. I can't wait to post it and see ya'll reaction.
Adele is the nicest, right? She's going to play a bigger role and you'll be surprised with how she comes out the other end. When I first began outlining this story, Adele was the one I needed to be there for Pam. Adele was "sane" perso, who pan would ultimately look up too and the reason why she just didn't throw the towel in and left. Their bond is very important to the unvailing of the remainder of the story.
I want to apologize for the next chapter. But I promise the following ones will make up for it. I know this hit too close to home - and I appreciate your sincerity and openess and girl I'm completly devoted to this fic because I know someone out there cares enough about it to really connect to the story and connect with me. everytime there's a review from you I jump on my chair like a kid on xmas eve!
Thanks you bunches, -D
Date: November 16, 2011 11:45 pm Title: Chapter 8
I'm going to see if I can remember at least some of the rest of what I wrote for this chapter, the part that was somehow cut off. I was talking about Karen and how I saw her as maybe a bigger threat to the Halpert family than many other girls. I will say, and I think I pointed this out, I am SO thrilled that Jim made the decision to go to Australia despite what Karen thought or wanted. To me he actually didn't seem to really even want her to go. I mean it seemed a lot like a throwaway invitation, and I have another ticket if you want to come, something like that. I think he may have been stating to see clearly that his reasons for being with Karen in the first place, to purge Pam from his mind, simply weren't working. In adition, if he still felt like he didn't want to follow his dad's script for his life, I'm CERTAIN that he could easily tell that daddy dear was absolutely thrilled with his choice to date Karen and that his dad was in fact doing his best to move that particular relationship along. We of course know that if his dad would have ever had any reservations about Karen, because of the dire situation with Pam, he would have thrown any of those aside because with a boy like Jim who clearly wanted away from anything and anyone his father in particular wanted for him, Karen was as good as it was going to get. She's the daughter of his friend and while they aren't Halpert wealthy, at least she isn't a little mousy receptionist nobody. I think what his dad would have really like to see happen is, let's face it, if Pam is going to continue living in Philly in the situation she is in, with the Andersons, there is a huge chance that at some point Jim is certainly going to come across her or a picture of her, something. Dad's goal I think is to move this relationship with Karen towards marriage as quickly as he can. It would be GREAT I'm sure in Gerry's mind if they could be married with Karen at the very least expecting before Jim were to come across Pam again because in Gerry's mind I think one of two things would prevent Jim from going to Pam at that point. Either he would actually feel as much for Karen at this point that Pam didn't really matter any longer (because I simply think Gerry cannot grasp the concept of clear, pure, true love... of being soul mates and the fact that this is what Jim and Pam represent to each other) or if Jim hadn't actually fallen that far for Karen I think in his dad's mind he knows Jim is really a good guy at heart and he knows it would be a problem for Jim to leave if he either has a family or one on the way. So, I'm really glad to see that this time neither his dad's manipulation with buying Karen tickets to Australia as well, nor Karen's in getting angry and trying to force her will on him to get him to go with her to Scranton, worked. Of course, Karen doesn't know that Jim really can't return to Scanton. There are a mulitude of reasons, the biggest of course being that he just cannot face returning to the memories he left in Scranton. He's been running so fast and so hard away from those memories, trying to erase them if possible and if not lock them far away, he certainly isn't going to return there, not when he has optioms. As a Halpert I imagine there are always options. He also isn't going to retuen there because Pam isn't the only one who doesn't know the truth about him, people in Scranton know him by a different last name and have no idea about his family history. Last, Jim has caredully avoided telling Karen about Pam and how in love with her he was/is. Once they would return to Scranton there is just no doubt that not only would questions about Pam assult Jim, Karen would quickly learn the truth and Jim wouldn't want that. So while I can't help but reserve a little room for doubt about Karen REALLY being gone in the corner of my mind, the rest of my mind is rejoicing that YAY! Jim has broken things off with Karen and headed in a different direction. I seriously doubt that he'll even be in touch with her at all now because I think he knows that any contact is going to bring questions about Pam, even if they are no longer a couple. (Very happy to be waving good bye to Karen out the rear window.)
Now, as happy as I am to see Jim taking the path that ends things with Karen, I can't help but want to smack him upside his head. HELLO JIM????? Are you in there? You realize that if your dad is dismissing you from Thanksgiving, pushing your relationship with Karen, dismissing you from the family Christmas party, the party that you already missed last year because they didn't know where you were so certainly they would expect your attendance this year, yet daddy dear is absolving you of your duty though mom clearly has been expecting your attendance and dad is not just allowing you to also skip Christmas at home, he is really ordering you away. You think he's joking but you grew up with this man. Not only those things, now he's handing you your dream vacation. I mean really Jim??? You think your ruthless businessman father would reward you with a vacation to Australia after all that has happened???? Why are you not questioning your dad's motives. You KNOW your dad and if he seems to be just fine with what you are doing, you of ALL people should be one that is going to question this! UGH!!! Attention Jim, please somehow get knocked hard on the head so you can have some freaking sense knocked into you! I can't help but think that I wonder if at some point Jim is going to see some pictures from the Christmas party, maybe there is a Halpert newsletter that goes out that he would get, and he would see pictures of Pam at the families Christmas party. I think it would be neat if his mom, not knowing the schemes his dad has going, sent some pictures to Jim. Just something that floated through my mind.
Now, on the other side of the coin, about Pam and Adele. I know others seem to really like her but I just find her to be pushy and manipulative when it comes to Pam. She seems to be always right there, pushing her will on Pam. I had problems back chapter or so when they were at the U/S and Pam asked the DR if he/she could tell what the baby was and Adele piped right up with, but don't you want to be surprised? making it clear what Adele's desires are. I wonder about things like this Christmas Party. Pam is very clearly NOT into looking for a dress though Adele again seems to be pushing what she wants and likes on Pam, but the whole idea of this party in the first place, it just seems like about the last thing that Pam would probably want to do. She big pregnant. She's got the miseries, aches and pains that come with that stage of pregnancy. She doesn't have the person she loves with her and other than the Andersons she isn't going to know anyone at the party, I can't see her really wanting to go. I CAN see Adele just sorta telling her they are going to be going to this party and not really asking about if Pam wants to attend. I see Pam right now as kinda Adele's little thing that she wants to show off and I would think the more she wants to and the more she actually does show Pam off and pronounce to the world that Pam is carrying Kenny's child, the more it seems that Pam would become uncomfortable with it all because it's one thing to pretend with a small family, well, actually just the one person since the dad and Roy know the baby isn't Kenny's, so it's one thing for Pam to Pretend just for Adele that she is carrying Kenny's child. When she has to listen to Adele tell person after person about this being Kenny's child as she parades Pam around like she's somehow Adele's own little prize, I have to believe that this would make Pam begin to grow very uncomfortable. I KNOW that she doesn't want all of these people viewing this baby as belonging to anyone but her and Jim, after all, she loves him. He continues to haunt her mind which is so understandable as part of him is growing and growing and now continuously making it's presemce known to her. I imagine her in her room alone talking to the baby and reassuring her that her dad's name isn't Kanny. His name is Jim and going on to tell the baby all about it's dad and about her how very much she loves him. I think is the stillness of these times is probably when Pam tries to decide what she can/should do about things with Jim. I very much believe that Pam would not be able to go forever without letting Jim know that he is a dad. All her fears aside, I just think that's the kind of person she is. I think she probably also hopes that Jim is missing her as much as she is missing him. After all, she does know that he did in fact love her and he didn't want things to end. SO, I think if things continue like this with Adele for much longer, I think Pam is going to become resentful of all the intrusion. (I also hope that like on the show, Pam secretly calls and asks the DR what the baby is. After all, the DR did specifically tell her she could.) The thing is, none of this is what Pam bargained for. She went along with this whole ploy because she was told that Adele was a very sick woman and so fragile that just learning the truth about something that she made up in her own mind, that this is Kenny's baby, is not true, might kill her. So Pam went along thinking that she wouldn't have to do this for very long and in the meantime she could pull her life together and decide what she is going to do. Well, somehow Adele has aparently gotten much healthier as she is able to go to DRs appts with Pam and shopping at the busiest time of the year. Not to mention attending huge Christmas parties so she is doing much better and there appears to be no end in sight for the pretending that Pam is being forced to do. I mean, will these people expect her to go as far as listing Kenny on the birth certificate and giving it the Anderson's last name? ::shudder::: I can see Adele trying to push these issues. The thing is, though I have to believe that this has to all now be weighing Pam down and making her at least a bit resentful of the situation, how does she get out of it? I mean, it's going to become even harder to extract herself from it after the baby is born so I'm hoping she's starting to think about these things. The thing is, she has alowed these people, however nice they are, to take total control of her and her life, the baby's too really. They are feeding her, clothing her, housing her and paying all her bills. That's a pretty steep price to pay for someone like Pam who seems like she's been pretty independent. I just can't help but wonder what Pam is thinking and where she sees this all ending. How long is she going to pretend?
This chapter was certainly a MUCH easier read than the last few but I can't help but hope we are getting closer to some real happiness for our couple. I mean, Pam is okay where she is, but she is sad missing Jim and I think the pretending is probably weighing heavy on her. Jim is learning that he can't just erase Pam from his mind, not even by putting someone else in her place. I think they have suffered and would just like to see them start seeing some glimmers of light.
Another well written chapter, full of suspense. You know, maybe this fic doesn't have the largest of audiences, but I just hope you know that the core of us that are here, that come back and review chapter after chapter, believe in this a whole lot and are so grateful that you are seeing this through. I can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: This is all too accurate and a perfect analysis once again. I have to go and pick up the brain pieces that fell out of my head! Wow! Just.... wow!