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Reviewer: Duchess Cupcake Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 30, 2018 10:44 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Whew! This one was a doozy but I like it!! You did an amazing job of maintaining a subtle undercurrent of the power and influence Kelly and Jim have over each of them. Really good stuff.

Reviewer: Boysenberry Signed [Report This]
Date: March 18, 2016 02:27 pm Title: No Longer In Service

And then Ryan wakes up and it was all a dream.

Naw, I don't see Pam/Ryan. At. All. Not even like this.

Reviewer: skjbean Signed [Report This]
Date: April 03, 2007 08:13 pm Title: No Longer In Service

This was rec'd recently on TWoP and wow. Amazing.  But poor Pam. And poor Kelly.

Reviewer: DinkinFlicka Signed [Report This]
Date: March 12, 2007 06:02 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Ohh, so angsty and yet completely satisfying.  How have I not read this yet??

Reviewer: Alex Wert Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: February 14, 2007 08:45 pm Title: No Longer In Service

This was better than I thought it would be.  Somehow the pairing of Angry!Empty!Pam and Dazed!Self-Loathing!Ryan works for me.  And I love just how permeated Ryan's existance is with Kelly.  The man doesn't have a chance.

Reviewer: PuffingNoise Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 31, 2006 08:20 am Title: No Longer In Service

I forgot to add that I really liked the thing you did with the words inthe parentheses.

Author's Response: (Thanks. :))

Reviewer: PuffingNoise Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 31, 2006 08:17 am Title: No Longer In Service

Wow, this is really interesting. I never would have thought of Pam and Ryan, but this makes a lot of sense here. She feels hopeless and confused about what's going to happen with Jim and what she didn't tell him and she finds comfort , but in sort of a punishing-herself sort of way (with her not taking her barrette out and letting it cut into her head until it bled) with Ryan. It's a far-fetched situation, but the characters seemed in-character. So, props for this.

Author's Response: Thanks, I tried to keep it as in character as possible...they are both just such lost characters.  Their melacholy pulled them together.  :(  So sad.

Reviewer: NeverEnoughJam Signed 8 [Report This]
Date: October 30, 2006 11:23 am Title: No Longer In Service

Whoa. I mean. Whoa. I never thought I'd like SlutPam but this is very good. Quite believable. I like Ryan walking around shell-shocked. I think he is taking advantage of her here, but it's not like she didn't start this. He's just doing what a guy would do--she's offering free sex and he's for sure not going to pass it up. I would really like to see the next day at the office between these two. 

Loved the line "they both ignore what she said." I could certainly have used a tad more detail about that lovely Ryan and his blue, blue eyes, but this is a short piece and might have unbalanced it. 

Well done. Very well done.



Author's Response:

Thank You...I hope she didn't come across as too slutty, I tried to frame it up as two sad and slightly desperate people coming together. (and with that, I shall TWSS myself:))

Actually, in the original version, there was more detail (with Ryan), but I ended up getting rid of it, because it did feel unbalanced.  I was working more from a Pam perspective.  Ha, and I daresay the next day they are both in the office would be too awkward to handle.:) 

Anyway, thank you so much for the review - I appreciate it. 

Reviewer: pennylane83 Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 30, 2006 06:00 am Title: No Longer In Service

Wow. More than anything else, I really enjoyed the little details you've incorporated here. The description of Pam's car- that Ryan didn't have to move the seat back is really telling. Great job!



Author's Response: Thank You!

Reviewer: bitterpill Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 29, 2006 03:27 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Wow.  Angst-a-plenty.  Very well done.  Looking forward to more from you:)

Author's Response: Thanks!  Yeah, this one was angst with a side of angst. :)

Reviewer: Luna Mystik Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 29, 2006 07:44 am Title: No Longer In Service

I really liked this, the angst of it. You write well, I like the way you place alternatives between parenthesis. If ever I try my hand at writing again, I might borrow it. Hope you don't mind...

Author's Response:

Thank you!  I'm glad you liked the parenthesis usage, I always think that Pam is someone who is never really sure of what she is thinking and needs many alternatives to correctly gauge what she is feeling/thinking. Go ahead and borrow anything you want, I read absolutely everything and I'm sure I borrowed it from some writer who is actually a writer writer...(and I just set the record for putting the word "writer" in one sentence).

Oh, and I hope you do start writing again...I like your fics. :)   

Reviewer: Par5 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 29, 2006 04:34 am Title: No Longer In Service

I can hear in my head the way Pam said in the episode "Ryan, are you okay?" and it segues easily into this piece. Well done.

Author's Response: Thank you!  Yeah, the way she said it (upon my 4th or 5th viewing) actually put the idea in my head...but I think I ruined the ending for myself.  Now every time I watch the episode, it'll end and I'll think to myself, "And now Pam goes and bones Ryan."  Damnit.

Reviewer: falldownmore Signed 9 [Report This]
Date: October 29, 2006 02:10 am Title: No Longer In Service

She cries out, once, and they both ignore what she said

 

i absolutely adore that line. great fic, very well written! 



Author's Response: Thank you so much!  (BTW - "Drawn" was excellent - I left you a review - so good.  I loves me the angst.)

Reviewer: Fish Anonymous [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 09:57 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Yay! I really like this.

Author's Response: Thank you! 

Reviewer: ElizabethLynn Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 09:38 pm Title: No Longer In Service

If she had a map now, she would place Connecticut on the other side of the country.

Ah, man. Yeah, that's what it feels for poor Pammy.  (And us, too!  Come back, Jim!)

And this?

She cries out, once, and they both ignore what she said as Ryan covers her mouth with his own and slides into her.

I am SUCH a sucker for sexy-sad, and you done brung it in this story. 

I hope to read more from you! 



Author's Response:

Yeah, I got so sad at the end of The Initiation, because I kept thinking, "Well, I know Jim will (spoiler alert!) come back, but she has no idea." Gah. 

I'm glad you enjoyed the sexy-sad, I love it, but I know that it does not float everyone's particular boat.  There's just something about the sadness of these characters that gets to me after I (eventually) stop laughing.

Perhaps I will write more now that I took the first step and posted something...I did write another thing earlier this summer.... 

Reviewer: kaystar Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 06:09 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Really enjoyed this. Great line - "She kisses him and it tastes like beer and her own disappointment" 

Author's Response: Thanks!  Wow, all this amazing feedback makes me feel better - I was worried about how it would be received.  

Reviewer: Jonah5 Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 05:46 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Wow. [/Jim]  Not what I was expecting, but so very good.  The dialog especially was spot on.  I love that you incorporated the line about the temp agency too.  Great oneshot.

Author's Response: Thank you!  I was unsure about the dialog, so it means a lot that you said that. :)

Reviewer: GirlFriday Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 05:19 pm Title: No Longer In Service

Wow. This was so well-written. Realistic, sad, and totally possible.

Author's Response: Thanks!  The idea absolutely haunted me, and then once I had written it, I felt like crying.  I'm too sad for my own good.  

Reviewer: proposals Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: October 28, 2006 03:40 pm Title: No Longer In Service

This was wonderful. I liked how you highlighted the differences between Jim and Ryan. Particularly the bit about Ryan fitting in her car, and how someone tall (Jim) wouldn't.

You captured their hopelessness and melancholy perfectly, and it's like the show minus the funny and you remember how terribly sad their lives really are.

I also really love the ambiguity of Ryan's feelings toward Kelly. On one hand, he didn't get her anything for their anniversary and he slept with Pam, but Pam had that pink coat that he reached out to touch...

Lovely.



Author's Response: Thank you so much!  I'm especially glad you liked the Ryan/Kelly parts - I always feel like Ryan is never really sure how he feels about her, yet obviously he's still with her.  It's funny, I really wanted to be able to write a fluffy Jim/Pam piece after the call, but it felt wrong.  As far as Pam knows, he's never coming back.  *Sigh*  I get way too emotionally involved.  

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