You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: HonestAndCourageous Signed [Report This]
Date: March 07, 2020 08:16 pm Title: Chapter 1

Super cute! I like the joy and energy in your writing. You clearly have a lot of fun creating. Thank you for a fun read!

Author's Response: I really did have a lot of fun! Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: March 05, 2020 03:46 am Title: Chapter 1

This was fun. Lovely to see the Halperts having a day like this. I can easily see that Phillip would have gotten the highest score in mini-golf, running around tapping his ball hither and yon. However in golf, mini or otherwise, one wants the lowest score. Maybe they've got some family rules or something.

Yes it feels kind of rushed, some grammar issues here and there, but they don't really detract from the story.

Just lovely to see them having some good time as a family. I wish my parents had pulled me out of school for my 10th birthday. My classmates would have been jealous too. All in all a lovely little story. Thanks for writing it.

Author's Response:

I'll definitely need to go back and edit it haha. I threw it together pretty fast once I saw NLM's note (like in 40 minutes kind of fast since I had a tiny window of time)!

As you can tell, I don't play golf (or mini golf) very often. They don't have family rules...I just don't know the game very well, but thank you for giving me the benefit of the doubt!

Thanks for the feedback and reading. Even though it was a quick write, it was a lot of fun. 

Reviewer: JennaBennett Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: March 05, 2020 03:10 am Title: Chapter 1

This was very, very sweet. A nice glimpse into what could be. I loved the nod to canon during their mini golf game.

Author's Response: Thank you for the sweet note. I was hoping people would notice the nod to canon.

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans