Date: September 26, 2020 09:14 pm Title: Chapter 1
Uggghhhh this is so, so good--I love how you make each character just so sympathetic. I mean, take Karen--you hit that fine line between realistically unlikeable and still completely understandable. Also the hallucinations are heart-wrenching and hilarious at the same time. I can't wait to read more!
Date: September 21, 2020 08:27 pm Title: Chapter 4
Just caught up on these last two chapters! First, this line made me laugh out loud: “When did you turn into the bargain-basement Gordon Gekko?” You have so many fun lines like this that make the story so fun to read!
I’m glad Jim is feeling better and that they’re finally talking! Karen coming in right as they start to turn a corner was evil but I LOVE it. I like how you write her, she can be tricky but I like the mean girl version of Karen we sometimes see and I think you’ve written a very great and believable version of that. I also loved the entire lead up to her entrance, it was all so sweet! Can’t wait to see what happens next!
Date: September 14, 2020 01:55 pm Title: Chapter 4
Karen is such a bitch!
Pam updated her on Jim’s illness several
times and Karen just blew her off. Also when
Karen got off work she went to her hotel instead of going to help take care her boyfriend.
Then all of a sudden she acts shocked and appalled that Pam is there.
Jim is weak. He and Pam switched places.
Jim is now in her shoes when she was with Roy.
Karen is Jim’s Roy.
I have faith that JAM will be together in the end, but Pam should make him grovel.
Please update soon.
Date: September 11, 2020 11:21 pm Title: Chapter 4
What a chapter! I like it so much!
Where to start? So many moments that I want to point at and say 'fantastic!': the puzzle analogy then Jim thought about him and Karen, the comparison Pam to Boudica (I love her so much!), Daisy the Panter, and Pam's sketches of her... the whole 'Zombie Jim isn't coming back.'
I love Pam here that she changed so much and yet remained herself. You nailed to show this transformation of her!
I love Karen here that she felt that something off while being obscure to the real reason. The way she discovered about Pam and Jim's connection was heart-aching, and I thought she was on the edge if she seriously considered asking Kelly about things... I want to hate her for popping the 'happy bubbly,' but I can't since she had all rights to do that (and the whole scene was so cool, though it hurt my JAM loving heart).
I want to like Jim as well, but he was so wishy-washy that I... oh well, he's sick and tired, I shouldn't judge him so much.
But the last scene! Fantastic and heartbreaking. It made me think of Casino Night, but this time it was Jim who chose someone over Pam. I feel so much compassion to her here, she suffered enough. All I wish is that she has a tad of happiness in the end.
Thank you so much, and I'm looking forward to the next part of the story!
Date: September 11, 2020 06:43 pm Title: Chapter 4
A long chapter but well worth the wait. Loved all the scenes of Pam changing during the summer. Standing up for herself, embracing new things she hasn't before. Seemed like it gave her the warm ups to deal with the current situation. That is trying to really mend things with Jim. Loved all that.
Also loved her settling in at Jim's place. Drawing differnt pictures of the panther, making observations of the decor, loved to see her mind work.
Jim feels like he's starting to come back. They're bantering again which is adorable by the way. You wrote all the easy JAM banter really well. Getting closer to the hard discussions though. Still not there, but it feels like there's groundwork laid for it.
And then there's Karen. Feels like she's finally getting a clue and so she's going to try and dig in her heels. Though it feels like being on the verge of despiration. She can feel Jim slipping. Though part of me feels like the more she digs in, the more he'll slip through her fingers.
A little heartbreaking to see Jim just let Pam leave like that. Though if it's to have a hard conversation with Karen before a hard conversation with Pam then that makes sense. Feels like we're on the verge of something big and I can't wait to see what it is.
Date: September 11, 2020 03:53 pm Title: Chapter 4
I cannot stress enough how good this story is!!! You actually make me feel bad for Karen while simultaneously hating her. You had a lot of great metaphors and similes in this chapter too that just gave me a really clear picture of what was going on. And the way Karen snapped at Pam?!?! I’m so excited for the next chapter! The ending was ominous but I feel like there’s a reconciliation on horizon and I cannot wait! :D
Date: September 11, 2020 03:32 pm Title: Chapter 4
Lot to like about this chapter. I appreciated the interaction with the camera crew and Jim and Pam's perspective on them, how they're impacting their story and their relationship with them. I think the pace is working well - Jim's illness isn't a magic bullet so much as an opportunity for them to rebuild their ties and do the work they need to do.
But honestly, more than anything else, I love them bonding over Daisy the Panther. There's some great Jim and Pam banter in here!
Date: September 11, 2020 02:04 pm Title: Chapter 1
I’m just going to leave one review instead of bombarding with one on every chapter. But I’m loving this! I especially love your characterization of all of them, especially Karen. I feel like there’s not a lot we know about her and here you’ve created this amazing backstory to explain why she is how she is and I’m here for it. But also, she can go now. Haha
I also love the slow unraveling of Jim and Pam figuring things out again and *trying* to talk about it. Can’t wait to keep reading! Great work!
Date: September 11, 2020 01:52 pm Title: Chapter 4
I’m so glad to see an update of this!
“low-battery version of Scranton Jim” this is a brilliant description. I can totally see it.
“and not postponing it, like Roy and his family told her to do until she ‘got over herself.’” Ugh. This is a perfect Roy, completely on point with his general terribleness.
Pam’s risk taking is so great. I can see Fancy New Beesly coming to life in all your descriptions of her risks.
‘Pam. You have one job right now. Don’t lose him.’ The layers of meaning. I just —
“He’s like a wrong shaped puzzle-piece she’s trying to squeeze into place, snipping away at the bits that don’t fit.” This is the heart of Karen and Jim. I like that Jim is able to perceive it, and that he feels kind of guilty for encouraging it.
Pam turning the documentary crew away is so, so good.
“sometimes it actually feels like they’re encouraging her?” Can’t blame the crew for shipping JAM like literally everyone else...
“I told him they were going to make firing decisions based on our personal warmth and ability to bond with coworkers” I love this. I love this so much. This is the perfect prank. I could see this happening in canon.
“the first word that entered my head when I saw it was Michael” This is too funny! It’s so true! I can totally picture Michael with decor like this! It’s the ultimate kindly insult to Jim too. How perfect.
Oh. Oh. Oh. That ending. Ouch. Poor Pam.
Date: August 19, 2020 05:04 am Title: Chapter 3
I love that we're able to get a glimpse into every character's point of view. I'm also enjoying your characterization of Karen. The way you describe her- "Karen moves like she talks and thinks. Kind of staccato." Such a great description.
I'm excited to see where you're going with this!
Author's Response: Thank you - I'm so glad you're enjoying it!
Date: August 18, 2020 04:26 am Title: Chapter 3
I’m so delighted to see an update of this story!
We’re consolidating my love for Abi early on and I am more than okay with it: “actually she is clever—and lovely. But also devious.”
“Apart from his imminent demise, obviously.” Yes to the little pockets of humor. Just perfection.
“he’d absolutely have gone downstairs” oh Jim. Of course he would have.
It breaks my heart that he’s sure her being there is a misunderstanding and he doesn’t want to draw attention to it. That seems so very right in terms of his thought processes.
Oh boy and the passage about him having the strength to deal with Karen. So very real.
Jim’s thoughts on Karen fit entirely with what I imagine Jim’s thoughts on Karen. His panic over her turning it up a few notches more than he was anticipating also keeps very well with Season 3 Jim. You describe his thought processes so well.
Pam’s thoughts on Karen are also wonderfully written. I can totally see her telling herself to be nice to Karen (and at the same time maybe feeling like Karen isn’t the nicest in return...)
“predatory fish are a clear and present danger” Well, this is all very adorable. They’re slipping back into banter and reading Dwight and I love it so.
“He raises his eyebrows and lets out a long slow whistle.” Your cast of supporting characters in this is just so great. This version of Tom is a whole lot of brotherly fun.
“She’s like a pink-cardiganed, tan-pantyhosed fucking Wonder-Woman.” Yes, yes she is and it’s so lovely to see Karen recognize this. I feel a little like she’s generally portrayed as looking down her nose at Pam and I love this change.
“of a workplace superior she barely knows.” Oh girl... This does not end well for Karen...
With what we know about Jim's feelings for Pam, I find it hard to see his relationship with Karen as much more than a 'getting back in the game' move with someone he finds attractive, or trying to drag himself back to some kind of normality (... and with the added bonus of helping him save face with Pam, or putting up a defensive wall, or whatever.) Maybe open to moving things up a level if it should work out. But...
Anyway, thanks again for a lovely review! I really appreciate it.
Date: August 17, 2020 07:37 pm Title: Chapter 3
I really liked being able to get into everyone's head in this chapter. Sure it dispelled some of the mystery but knowing that delerious and cognizant Jim want Pam around is a balm to my jam heart. Karen learning of Pam's mediator superpower was a nice touch. I'm glad to hear you don't intend to leave us hanging on a cliffy for too long, looking forward to it!
Author's Response: Many thanks, DoomGoose! Much appreciated.
Date: August 17, 2020 06:53 pm Title: Chapter 3
Well then. Where to start. I love Pam's section most, but honestly all three are great. Good work on getting them all thinking but also SHOWING the thinking, not just implying it. Good work with Tom. I really enjoy this, glad to hear more is on the way (and yes, if you want to cliffhang I personally would appreciate a quick update after).
Thanks, Comfect! Glad you enjoyed Tom.
Date: August 17, 2020 02:27 pm Title: Chapter 3
Great chapter here. I really like that we're getting multiple POV's. I'd been looking forward to Jim since we hadn't heard from him yet and you delivered.
His feelings are all over the map. I really like how you said he didn't have the energy to balance the spinning plates anymore. What a great metaphor. It would be tiring. Trying to feel something for Karen. Trying to avoid feeling anything for Pam. Trying to keep his heart from re-shattering. Trying to figure out who he is and what he wants to do. Seems exhausting. So all he's really left with is Karen trying to put his life together for him but who isn't there. And Pam who seems to just want anything he can offer, who is still there.
I love that Pam is sticking around. Clearly her feelings towards Jim are still there otherwise I feel like she would have left or called Karen to come over. She's still being her sweet self in that she's updating Karen. I know it's hard on her, but it shows her character. However she's not ready to leave his side. Really great to see that.
Kind of a nice bit of levity with Tom showing up. Very brother-esque between them. Even though Tom is ribbing at Jim, the fact he shows up with soup also shows he cares.
And to end things with Karen. As others have said, yes this shows just how out of the loop she is. Not just with Jim and Pam, but with everything in Scranton. This is a world she doesn't understand and sorry to say can't really fit into. However she did stumble on something. Pam is the heart of the office. Without Pam there, all these things start to build up. Great bit of perspective there.
Can't wait to see what comes next.
I think his feelings probably would be all over the place: he's portrayed as a reasonably decent chap, so I'm assuming his motivation isn't purely cynical...but he's hurt and bitter and needing to move on from the pain, and that's probably a contributing factor in his decision to get involved with Karen - even though it's too soon for him to be emotionally available to someone else.
And because he's basically decent, it would likely be messing with his head when he's forced to confront the reality of what he's doing, and what the implications of his choices are.
And thanks for the review, Warrior!
Date: August 17, 2020 12:52 pm Title: Chapter 3
A cliffhanger is on the horizon?! I can hardly wait for this to update as it is! I really loved the take on Karen. That last part in her perspective actually made me not hate her and I might have gasped when she said that Pam was “holed up in an apartment with a work superior she hardly knows” because it shows how out of the Jam loop she is. I’m excited for the updates to come :D
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and replying. I'm glad Karen's working for you - I couldn't really figure her out in canon, so I made up my own one. :0)
Date: August 17, 2020 10:57 am Title: Chapter 3
Sam, I am at work and have already spent more time reading this wonderful chapter than I should have. So I don't have the time to properly sing the praises of the depth and insight and delightfully teasing tone of this amazing installment! "Enthralled" is what comes to mind --- kind of an old-fashioned word, but that's where I am! You sure know how to intricately spin a tale! LOVE this!
Author's Response: Gosh - you're very kind. Hope the next chapter measures up!
Date: August 17, 2020 10:32 am Title: Chapter 3
Excellent chapter! It fulls of tiny moments that look like pieces of the puzzle and create a perfect picture.
The things I like about this chapter probably the most are Pam's thoughts that she kinda admired Karen and Karen's
'She’s like a pink-cardiganed, tan-pantyhosed fucking Wonder-Woman.'
That's so, so great!
Thank you for the awesome chapter and looking forward to the next one.
Author's Response: Thanks for your reply, Dernhelm. Glad you're enjoying it so far! And I'm really glad you found the pieces made a picture - i was kind of worried it was a bit fragmented.
Date: August 16, 2020 08:53 am Title: Chapter 2
I'm very much looking forward to the perspective of hallucinatory Jim. This is a really good story so far, especially Pam/Karen, so I'm excited for where you go with it next!
Author's Response: Thanks! Hope hallucinatory Jim worked for you.
Date: August 16, 2020 08:40 am Title: Chapter 1
Oh dear. I mean, I really like how you're filling in a Karen backstory here and I think it makes her really sympathetic, but holy moley girl see the red flags in front of you and run!
Quite. She seems smart - it's a bit of a puzzle she allowed herself to get dragged into this. IMO, obvs. :0)
Thanks for your review, Comfect!
Date: August 15, 2020 09:08 am Title: Chapter 2
I love that they are getting into their old dynamic, but o can't help but think things are going to go sour soon. I am dreading and anticipating seeing things from Jim's side and how his frame of mind is. Looking forward to the next chapter for sure!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Date: August 07, 2020 01:31 pm Title: Chapter 2
I am so captivated by this! It’s such a great premise and forces everyone to take a look at what they really want, what they try to push aside during waking or conscious hours. I love how Pam wasn’t hesitant to help him when he asked, I love how you have shown the juxtaposition of Karen’s Jim and real Jim, and I actually really liked having that whole first chapter be from Karen’s perspective. I don’t feel like we see that a lot, and like we don’t get a whole lot of insight into her. Your characterization makes total sense. Great job, looking forward to more!
Author's Response: Thanks, BigTuna. I'm really glad it's working for you. I was a bit worried I'd crossed the 'cheese' line with this...
Date: August 05, 2020 04:26 pm Title: Chapter 1
I laughed out loud more than once while reading this! You're hilarious and the chemistry between Jim and Pam is palpable even when he's so out of it. I also love Pam's analysis of Jim and Karen's decor and what it signifies for their relationship. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: You're very kind! And thanks - I'm really glad you're enjoying it.