Date: December 15, 2020 02:51 pm Title: Chapter 15
You really let us feel Pam’s terror and warped sense of self here, and how that terror pervades everything – her path forward with Jim, her efforts to deal with what’s happened to her. The description of the Roy-smell clinging to her and triggering her is powerful.
The call with Helene was lovely, particularly in the sense that she thought to make it – you can see her reforming the support structure that’s been kept away from her. “You can still have all of those things, you deserve them all” is important for her to hear right now.
I’d love Jim to be a little gentler with her about bringing the sexual abuse Roy inflicted on her to light – I get where he’s coming from and his message seems right, but it does feel like he’s losing the discipline he had in The Other Pam about making sure she feels like she’s the one making the decisions without being pushed too hard.
Date: December 14, 2020 05:35 pm Title: Chapter 15
Another powerful chapter. I like that Pam has more than one person she trust to talk to about hard things like this. Her Mom has proven she can be relied on. I also really liked that Helene gave Pam some gentle but still needed tough love. To have Pam verbally acknowledge she knows what Jim feels for her. Sometimes we need to say things out loud in order to start processing them like that.
Clearly Pam's scared that she's damaged the precious relationship she has with Jim. There's still a lot of fear in her. Slowly those fears are starting to go away, but they're still there. In some ways they seem even stronger. She has this great new relationship and while she knows and loves it, she's conditioned to expect things to go wrong. So there's fear there that the slightest mistep will cause the whole stack of cards to fall.
But Jim is no stack of cards. His love is proving a strong foundation that will weather any storm. Not that the winds won't blow or few drops of rain might seep in from time to time, but the foundation and walls protecting Pam are solid. I love that. Feels like Pam is really starting to realize that too.
Also loved that Jim wanted to get her the bracelet. A tangible sign that "this is how its supposed to be and you do deserve this." Wonderful.