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Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 06:54 am Title: Snowballs and an Eternal Flame

Jim does seem appropriately young teenage - a little bit self-absorbed, a little bit insecure, a little bit preoccupied with social status. It's a good mix with the flashes we see of the Jim we'll come to know, who prefers someone he can laugh with over someone with flash and who regards obnoxious behavior as a challenge to be solved.

I love getting Jim's perspective on this early eyes-met-across-a-crowded-room moment - of course she's effortlessly charmed young Jim!

Again, I think this remains pretty plausible as a forgotten prior meeting - you dance with plenty of cute girls at bat mitzvahs at that age, but the flying shoe is definitely gonna be what they retain.

Author's Response:

Hearing this from a guy's perspective, I'm glad to hear hit the notes or at least got near enough to them to be plausible. It helps I live with 2 boys who have recently been that age - even if they let me see glimpses of what they were like among their peers. But I did ask for their input on this one and they were very helpful. 

But I did want to still have the little nods to who Jim is, beyond being a typical teen. Like how he's more comfortable with the girl he could laugh with than the one that looks good on his arm. But he also does react to a good ego-stroking and likes a pretty girl- I kind of saw that in him when he dated Katy. I think at 13 you can be somewhat fickle too.

Glad you still think its plausible as a forgotten meeting. Like I said it's supposed to be based in canon. 

This has been a fun story to write and I'm glad to hear you are enjoying it. 

Thank again for being a steadfast reader and reviewer. With all the fics going up lately I do appreciate that you take the time not only to ready my stuff but give me input. It really is so great to hear reviews, so thanks again.

Oh and when is the next rejected cold open coming? I could use a good hearty laugh.

 

 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 05:56 am Title: Snowballs and an Eternal Flame

Skipping to the end quick because I just have to put this in because of that picture at the end. I know have a vision of young Jim and young Pam dancing together. However for the one and only time in their lives Pam is taller than Jim. Akward gangly armed Jim with a Pam who's just starting to bloom. D'awwwww.

So this was fun. Having never attended a Bar or Bat Mitzvah this was a nice look into how these things go. I feel you Jim with your feelings about Adam. Some people don't grow out of that so prank him as hard as you can.

I kind of can't wait till Adult Jim and Pam really get into the memories of this party. Maybe a trip through old photo albums is in order? After all based on her reaction to his high school yearbook photo, Pam loves early dorky Jim. Earlier dorkier Jim would probably be even more fun.

Lovely job with this one.

Author's Response:

Glad you liked the picture - as mentioned in the Discord chat, the rabbit holes we go down for research - I found this while doing mine and it was too good not to share. I also watched a few videos from bar/bat mitzvahs of the day - my memory is a little fuzzy and I needed to refresh it. The ones held now are a lot more teched out but follow roughly the same pattern.

They'll be a bit more about the height difference in the next chapter. It was actually my son, who btw is now the tallest in my family who suggested it when I asked for his input. Guess he remembers being shorter than the girls around this time too. I will tell him you appreciated it.

There's a bit more to come but I barely scratch the surface of the material that can be written from these events. A bunch of 13-year-olds at a fancy party, usually without their parents. Think school dance on steroids. 

Oh and you know they'll be digging out the old photo albums next time they visit with the folks. 

I'm really having a good time writing this one and happy to hear you are enjoying it. Nice to know it can be appreciated even if you don't know from what goes on at these events.  

As always thanks for being a steadfast reader and reviewer. I know there is a lot of stuff getting posted now so I do appreciate your taking the time to take my stuff for a spin.

 

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