Reviews For Murder in Savannah
You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: lazyloris Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 03, 2020 03:59 pm Title: Chapter 4

I love this fic so much!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 03, 2020 03:53 pm Title: Chapter 4

"The ass in human form that was Todd Packer." If there ever was a more apt and succinct description for Packer, I've never heard it. I do find it enormously interesting that apparently Packer called Jim into the library yet the meeting didn't seem to last very long. Of course there's the whole thing of Packer saying he needs a reporter, so clearly Packer anticipates something is going to happen. So he would want a reporter on hand to influence the spin of the story?

More layers uncovered. Packer has been an investor to both Micheal and Roy. Thus both Roy and Micheal are either in debt to Packer, or Packer has some kind of leverage over both men. Leverage he might want to use for favors. Now all of a sudden I have a feeling of Packer starting to set himself up as a mafia like boss. The spider at the center of the web who pulls on the threads of the web to make other jump and fall deeper into the trap.

I don't blame Jim for panicking about his notebook going missing. Considering some of the players in this game, players who seem to be keen for any information on all of their fellows, Jim's notebooks would be a prime piece of ammunition in those kinds of schemes.

And of course all the everything with Jim and Pam is just so wonderful. Pam checking him out on the porch, the almost kiss, the lines and timing from Booze Cruise, the leaning of her head on his shoulder, you're bringing in all the highlights and oh dear god am I here for that. I love that Pam is starting to open up to Jim some more. After she said he wouldn't understand he understandably get crushed. Yet then they cuddle on the porch and she starts to confide in him more. In some regard that does feel like a bit of whiplash, but it also feels genuine. Pam seems to want someone to confide in and Jim is right there ready and willing to step in and be there for her.

Loved the way you described Jim's relationship with her. A razor thing crystal bridge. Beautiful writing to invoke that kind of imagery. Again it just feel so very on point. But look at Jim go and start walk out on that bridge. Will it shatter? Will it hold? Will it strengthen? Who knows, but it's going to be a lot of fun finding out.

Author's Response: Loving the speculation as to what Packer's up to! Time will only tell whether your guesses are right. I know it does seem like Jim and Pam are moving pretty quickly, but that's completely by design. This story takes place over the course of a week, after all, so we have to establish their connection/form their feelings/see where it takes us pretty quickly. And she did give him some whiplash throughout the early seasons, as did he with her, so hopefully it's not too out there. I'm glad it still feels genuine! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, I'm glad you are a liking it!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 03, 2020 02:23 pm Title: Chapter 4

This is a really good balance of burgeoning forbidden romance and growing mystery - the way you're going between them and intermingling them feels very natural. You’ve built in these great little moments of Jim and Pam tiptoeing up to the lines of impropriety as they try to wrestle with their growing connection. Moving. And definitely, you know, *moving*. VERY curious about what it is Pam can’t afford, though.

I love the characterization of Kelly, which you have again made very strong very quickly. I am keeping a close eye on the household staff, though - between uber-innocent Erin, clever Kelly and full-of-himself Ryan and the room cleaning in which Jim's notebook was free to be examined, feels a lot like they might be involved in whatever comes next.

Like what you’re doing with the deepening of the mystery of Packer's involvement with his guests - clearly he's pulling the strings behind a bunch of them. I have to confess it did not occur to me that there was something inherently suspicious about the fact that Michael's company was so successful in taking down his old employer before now. And I am still very much rooting for Packer to be the murder victim - clearly he has some sway over a bunch of people at The Laurels who might want to be out from under his thumb, and also I hate him. Feels very possible he wants Jim there specifically because he wants to be able to more easily blackmail some of these guests and then will use something he has on Jim (or Wallace) to keep it quiet until he needs it. This seems like a poor plan with intrepid reporter Jim in play, though.

I love that you’re working in Michael’s tendency to put his leg up on the table a little too close to people. Also, congrats! You can officially use the Wet Jim/Pam tag on this story!

Author's Response: I love love love your speculations and theories. Time will tell how they turn out, but please keep them coming! Thank you so much for another great review, I appreciate it so much. Also, "and also I hate him" made me laugh out loud!

Reviewer: nicemorningtoo Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 03, 2020 11:33 am Title: Chapter 4

"All things considered, not a bad day." Ugh, well that just killed me. I don't know how you do it, but you make me love every chapter even more than the last. Their almost-kiss on the porch was great and then again on the balcony. You portrayed Michael beautifully. I'm so glad that Pam isn't as blind to Roy's attitudes and antics as she had been in the show, and that she trusts Jim so fully. So great.

Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much! I appreciate you reading and reviewing and am so glad you're liking it. I hope you continue to!

Reviewer: Sam Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 02, 2020 10:49 am Title: Prologue

I'm really enjoying this. I like the characters' various backstories and Pam and Roy's 'arrangement', and it all opens up lots of intriguing possibilities. Pam and Jim's developing relationship is really cute too. It's subtle, but it's quite clear how they're feeling about each other.
Really looking forward to reading more. And I have theories...

Reviewer: Dernhelm Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 01, 2020 10:19 am Title: Chapter 3

I have a weird habit of putting my reading on pause and making a few circles around my room when I'm getting excited or agitated or something like that. And reading this chapter, I did that at least... five times? I didn't really count...
Your writing is so beautiful! The scenes on the balcony and near the lake are my favorite so far — I'm a sucker for everything gentle and subtle yet meaningful, and these episodes gave me goosebumps... And I like your inclusion of mystery too (my piece of speculation: Todd Packer would be killed, and the only reason I don't want to see Roy as a corpse is because Jim would become the suspect t70;1 (and I don't like it!)).
And I feel like Pam's prank on Dwight might play a significant role in following events (I hope it turns into his invaluable help with the investigation).
Also, Erin is such a cutie!
Thank you so much for writing! Sorry that this review is disordered a little...

Reviewer: Sam Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: December 01, 2020 06:11 am Title: Chapter 1

I'm loving the way you're telling the story, and describing the location. I don't know anything about that part of the US, and you've made it very vivid for me (and I've googled some pics of the Spanish moss, which is just as you say!)
Intrigued, and looking forward to seeing where you take it next. Thanks!

Reviewer: Merria Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 28, 2020 02:40 pm Title: Chapter 3

I’m jumping in a little bit late. But, man, what a great story! I’m loving the Jim and Pam interactions and how you wove all the characters into this story.
So here’s my speculation: Senator Lipton is the one to get killed, there will be many suspects because of political rivalries and Angela’s past affairs. We will learn that Angela’s son is secretly Dwight’s.
And since Packer sucks, he’ll be the killer and Roy will be involved some way. So they both go to jail and we get rid of them.
Jim and Pam will figure things out and √Āngela and Dwight will also rekindle their romance. Probably by sneaking around during their stay.
Am I close?

Author's Response: I'm glad that you like it so much so far! I hope you keep enjoying it. It has been a labor of love for me, for sure. And I can't give anything away! I like your theories but as to whether or not any of them are close to what I have planned, you'll just have to read on to find out!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 28, 2020 01:29 pm Title: Chapter 3

Yes to Jim-Pam bonding. Although the fact that Pam is so moved by the simple fact of someone paying attention to her hurts, seeing them get to know each other and somewhat openly express their growing affection is lovely. A good memory to hold onto when the bodies start dropping. Talk about storm clouds on the horizon with her relationship with Roy, though.

Carefully noting another possible path for them to follow in the nebulous business relationship between Roy and Packer and Roy's early discharge... perhaps related to the mysterious money Packer has come into?

I am highly amused by Jim's take on Erin, although the more it gets described this way the more she's my dark horse pick for the murderer. Very much looking forward to Jim's conversation with Packer.

Author's Response: I had to throw some angst in there somehow, haha! I knew going in that I didn't want them to be engaged or really committed, but I knew that I needed there to be *something* there to give it that drama. It would have been too easy for them to just get together right from the start! Packer's money and Roy's military history and all the other little things will come in due time, but please keep the guesses coming! I love reading them!

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 28, 2020 02:37 am Title: Chapter 3

Okay, I am very, very curious as to why Roy was discharged. I have so many Questions. This is so beautifully written that I am immediately immersed with each update. I love how you are building their relationship and the turn of 'I can't' was brilliant.

Love this so much, BT!

Author's Response: You know, it never even occurred to me that you might have some insight into discharges from the military and I just kind of threw that in there without any further planning....off to do some research, haha! Thanks for RUINING MY FUN jk obv but I definitely have plans to make it juicier than I'd intended just for you! Thank you so much!

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 27, 2020 05:26 pm Title: Chapter 3

Nice to have some backstory here. About Pam's relationship to Roy and how she sees her life going forward. Likewise for Jim, the fact he did serve but didn't see any action. He's right, an early release from the Army, especially in wartime, rarely means anything good. Adds some depth to Roy's character.

Pam and Jim are adorable with everything here. It really feels like she's just as smitten with him as he is with her. However here, like canon, her perceived realities appear to be in the way of anything more than friendship. Though that walk through the woods to the pond and all the flirting they're doing are really pushing the boundaries of friendship, so in that regard it feels a lot like canon.

Overall, like Jim pointed out, there's something afoot. The pieces are being laid out and more than likely moving. Not really a whole lot to go on that I can see with this chapter. Other than Roy and Packer seem to have a good business deal. The fear of loss of wealth is a powerful motive for a crime. There's still a lot more to think about though. Great job, can't wait for more.

Author's Response: Thanks so much warrior!

Reviewer: nicemorningtoo Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 27, 2020 02:20 pm Title: Chapter 3

Ugh, BT. Every chapter of this story just amazes me more and more. The way you are able to keep these characters true to the show while also having them placed in this completely different universe is beautiful. I'm sad to hear that Pam and Roy's relationship isn't as simple as originally introduced, but I also love the slow burn of them getting together, so I cannot wait to see how you do that. Also the imagery of that lake was breathtaking. I could picture it so easily and I wish I was actually there. I can't wait for the next chapter!!

Author's Response: I wish I was there too! The lake is one of my favorite parts when I picture the house and the grounds. Can't you imagine it all still right before a big storm? Ugh. And as you might have seen in the chat the other day, I love some angst! I couldn't just let them get together right off the bat, that'd be way too easy. Gotta hurt 'em a bit first, you know? ;)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 01:08 pm Title: Chapter 2

Between the interlocking relationships of Oscar, Andy, Angela, Dwight and the (State) Senator, Packer's mysterious motives and undefined monetary gain; and whatever is going on with Pam you've given us (and Jim) a lot of paths to follow when the chaos starts. I am very, very intrigued and very, very much hoping the pace of updates keeps up!

I love poor Jim's being utterly consumed by thoughts of Pam right from the jump, much to the detriment of his actually doing his job. Some things don't change in any universe. And I really appreciate how well you've slotted Packer into the role of the mysterious millionaire up to no good - you've found a sort of sinister element to his obnoxious canon personality that leaves room for him to be clever as opposed to his usual dopey self.

"You gathered as much information as you could, even if it seemed like nothing worthwhile. And then, once you started to put it all together, the different elements clicked together into something?" "No detail was too small?" If you are trying to get me to reread this, madam... you have succeeded. I for one feel vaguely suspicious of Jim's conclusion that it was Pam who walked in on him earlier.

Some great table-setting in this chapter - looking forward to what comes next!

Author's Response: I'm trying hard to make sure I keep all these little paths straight! I have a hundred sticky notes pinned my homescreen, lol. It looks like Charlie's conspiracy board in that episode of IASIP when he's talking about Pepe Silvia. But I am so glad to read that you're enjoying them and intrigued so far! I have 9 chapters of this story written so far so I hope to do weekly updates! Maybe imposing a schedule on myself will keep me on pace with writing it since NaNoWriMo is over soon. Anyway thank you so much for this review! I appreciate it so much. I truly hope you keep enjoying it the way you have been.

Reviewer: lazyloris Signed [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 09:20 am Title: Chapter 2

I'm so intrigued! And relieved Pam in engaged!

Author's Response: I hope the intrigue stays!

Reviewer: GreenyshEyed Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 06:25 am Title: Chapter 2

This is one of the best canon divergent/AU stories I've read here and I've worked my way through almost all. Your talent SHINES. I can't wait to see how you weave these threads.

Author's Response: I really am kind of left speechless by this review. It's super meaningful to have someone say such kind things to me about my writing! Thank you SO much!

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 03:06 am Title: Chapter 2

I love all these breadcrumbs you are leaving us and of course, the canon moments so subtly placed. It's brilliant. I have so many Thoughts.

There is just so much delightful detail that you feel completely immersed. The Angela/Dwight/Oscar exchange was perfect and putting that description of Jim's laugh had me dying.

"boorish louse" is absolutely the best description of Roy

oh. OH. That ending. I have a feeling there is an ass-kicking coming and I am HERE FOR IT. ;)

Author's Response: Lady! Thank you so much. Roy is DEFINITELY a boorish louse, all day every day. And I love that I've had multiple comments on Jim's squeaky laugh--how could I not include one of the best things to exist on this planet? Your words mean so much to me; praise from someone with your talent is high praise indeed. I hope you keep enjoying!

Reviewer: boredhswf Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 23, 2020 02:33 am Title: Chapter 1

I love love love the entire premise of this. And YOU writing it? A match made in heaven.

Theodore F. Packer- I snorted.

"The heat and the drink slowed both his brain and body until he felt like molasses spilling out of its container as slow as you please." Well, if that isn't the most southern line to ever.

"She looked up towards the second story of the house--towards him--and he could have sworn that their eyes connected for the briefest of moments. " GOD this entire paragraph is perfection. Just kill me now.

You've set this up so beautifully! Savannah is such a hazy, dreamy city, drenched in sweet tea and Spanish Moss and you have made me feel like I am right back there. I love it so much.

Reviewer: agian18 Signed [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 08:27 pm Title: Chapter 2

“There was one, small, high-pitched squeak that escaped (something he’d been endlessly teased about by his older brothers, the way he squeakily giggled when something really tickled him)”

I hate you ( i

Author's Response: and i love you

Reviewer: Jim-jams Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 03:58 pm Title: Chapter 2

BT, I’m absolutely hooked. There’s so much intrigue already and I can’t wait to find out what happens next! I feel like Roy was making moves on Pam and I’m excited to see what Jim does, even if this wasn’t the case! The whole setup is very interesting, very Clue, and I am curious to see what you do next!!

Author's Response: Thank you, JJ! Clue is definitely an inspiration for this one. I even pulled out the game and looked at the different rooms so I could see what a big fancy house might have in it, lol! I'm so glad you're enjoying it so far!

Reviewer: nicemorningtoo Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 01:57 pm Title: Chapter 2

This is SO good, BT. I knew I was going to love this story, but now that I'm reading it, I'm blown away. The writing is fantastic, the details are perfect, and Jim and Pam's interactions couldn't be any better. I also love that Pam just works for Roy, and so I'm assuming they have no romantic relationship. I hope that is the case, after all. I can't wait to see who is the one that gets murdered (that sounds horrible) and how it will effect everyone. I can't wait for more!

Author's Response: I just have to tell you how much I love that you included "I can't wait to see who is the one that gets murdered" in your review! Top 10 review lines ever. I hope you keep enjoying!

Reviewer: WanderingWatchtower Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 12:43 pm Title: Chapter 2

Firstly, thank you for that picture of John.

Secondly, I LOVE how you added the detail of the squeaky laugh that we all know and love.

Thirdly, I’m seriously loving this so much. These characters are recognizable and familiar while still fitting in this setting and that’s impressive! I really can’t wait to keep reading! I’m definitely intrigued. :)

Author's Response: Isn't that picture great? Picture that Jim throughout this chapter and you'll be glad you did. And thank you so much! It's been tough to find a way to bring them all into this setting, so I'm so glad that you think it's working so far. I hope you keep enjoying!

Reviewer: Dernhelm Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 12:04 pm Title: Chapter 2

First of all, Pam + pre-raphaelite paintings are my favorite thing, and Jim thinking of her that way... just awww (here should have been that gif with fainting girls from 'Beauty and the Beast').
And I'm excited with the way you introduce characters and tell us their stories. There didn't happen much, but it feels so dynamic that you don't even notice the lack of action. And I love, love, love that immediate sympathy that appeared between Pam and Jim! Also, I fully realize that this of my delights will (most surely) be destroyed in the following chapters, but I was glad that Pam just works for Roy...
I'm looking forward to the next chapter with excitement and dread.

Author's Response: Don't you just love that pre-raphaelite comparison? I have a very beautiful, fair skinned, curly red-haired friend who was compared to one once and as soon as she told me about it I knew I'd find a way to work it into a story. I'm so glad to see that you liked it! And thank you so much for your compliments on this chapter--I know action wise it's not much and I worried that the exposition/narration would be boring to read, so I am so thankful that it wasn't. I will try to not break your heart too much with future chapters!

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 11:24 am Title: Chapter 2

I feel like there are a lot of layers starting to be place here with this chapter. First of all it seems that Roy and Pam are not romantically involved. Though that still remains to be seen. Though my JAM loving heart does hope for that. The dinner party was very interesting to read. Taking a lot of the relationships from canon but twisting them around in order to facilitate this mystery is a ton of fun.

Jim being enchanted by Pam is at both sweet and at the same time a great way to add in mystery here. If he's that unaware of his surroundings simply by being near her, what kinds of clues and hints might he miss going forward?

Still doing a great job with this one. Really looking forward to where we go from here.

Reviewer: Kuri333 Signed [Report This]
Date: November 22, 2020 05:30 am Title: Chapter 1

Now! This is off to a fantastic start! Amazing!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

Reviewer: 3vasectomies Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: November 21, 2020 11:08 am Title: Prologue

Wow, I love the Clue board game.

Seriously though, this one immediately grabbed me. The premise, the setup, the intrigue, it's all executed fantastically.

I wanna get into characterization because this was my favorite aspect of this piece.

- JIM: him being a reporter is brilliant. It works because he's an observer in canon, always has been from the show's start, so him being the one to analyze this nutty group of party guests makes total sense. There's also his professional relationship with Wallace, which I feel works with his constant aspirations for more than his given profession, and Wallace is giving him that chance despite his own ulterior motive of "I don't wanna see that Packer asshat."

- ERIN & RYAN: Again, perfect. Erin's shyness and need to answer to authority lines up with her early appearances in canon. And Ryan? Holding on to whatever limited power he has, thinking he's hot stuff and being rude and standoffish. Wonderful.

- ROY & PAM: even though they don't show up for long, it's great how you made Jim instantly fall for Pam the moment his eyes meet her. And her looking out through the landscape makes total sense given her aspirations as an artist; she wants to take in everything she can so she can replicate it with her brushes later. And Roy's boisterous arrival and propensity for alcohol are, well, all you really need for a Roy.

- AND THE REST: Their occupations, their profiles, and Jim's analysis of each one make me excited because it feels like these ARE the characters from the show, just in a different place and time. I especially love Phillip H's mention.

My only hope is that Pam isn't the killer. I'm not in the minority in that I want to see a happy ending, too, and I hope that she and a few others come out of this alive and able to recover. (I'm pretty sure that Jim was always gonna survive but, hey, been wrong before.)

I'm interested to see where this goes. Well done!

PS: If Kevin shows up as the head chef I'll be so happy.
PPS: Can't wait to see how Creed fits into all this if he does.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review! I love that the characterizations are standing out to you and that you think they're fitting as far as the characters we know. I definitely want them to feel familiar but true to the time and setting that I'm putting them in, so this means so much. I can't give anything away as to the ending/the killer/the murdered/how other characters come into play, so I hope that you keep enjoying and reading and are happy with the outcome!

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans