Date: January 16, 2021 06:47 am Title: Shells
“Pam sinks down at the base of the oak tree and puts her head between her knees. Roy. Bastard.
Whoops. Pam’s not supposed to think things like that at camp.
Nope, not as good.” I loveddd this. Haha and then followed by their yelling competition, perfect.
JJ I love this story so much!! The way he sort of asked her on a date was adorable and I am so excited to see what happens! Your writing is so funny and wonderful. :)
Date: January 15, 2021 08:55 pm Title: Shells
They have a child stuck in the tree. That's amazing. And I love that this same kid keeps getting stuck. This whole sequence works well - it's progress in their relationship and a sign that they care about each other and they're also learning some things about each other.
And it turns into a solid way to introduce Roy. I definitely want to know more about what happened with them now (because he's a real charmer and I can't imagine why anyone would leave him?) but I like Jim reflexively standing up for her. And it's especially important in this moment given that what Roy said was so cruel.
"You know… I think sometimes people get so caught up in what they wanted a person to be… that it’s hard to accept when that’s not who they are" is a really good line.
And his non-asking her out was adorable - as was the cicada backstory and him covering for her with Dwight. He is SMITTEN.
Date: January 15, 2021 07:57 pm Title: Shells
So that's a chapter. Lots of fun to imagine Jim and Pam in the tree to help bring the kid down. Really glad to see a softer side of Jim there too.
Hoo boy that's a helluva way to have Roy show up. If that's the way he acts then good on you Pam for getting out of there. Same for Jim for trying to deflect some of the rage to him.
And then he's adorably akward in asking her about the gallery. She's the same in her response and how he won't get out of her head the rest of the day. Tons of fun with this one.
Date: January 13, 2021 12:17 pm Title: Worst Impressions
Oh, JJ. This was utterly amazing.
The whole camp location, everything with Michael (which would definitely happen. Michael would totally blow off everything involving the kids), and Pam instantly not liking Jim. I love this, can't wait to see what happens next!
Date: January 12, 2021 09:38 pm Title: Worst Impressions
This is a really well developed start to this. I really like Pam not putting up with any of Jim's bullshit, which is a pretty unusual look for Pam, and Jim being able to see the softer side of her where no one else can anyways, and awaken a joy that she's lost for some reason. You did a great job quickly and effectively building up the universe of this camp, too.
I thought the teases of Pam's trauma with Roy and whatever it was about it that made her stop painting and Jim's romantic struggles were designed well - I'm certainly eager to read more, and it all felt like it flowed really naturally.
Also, throwing in the line about the heat warnings was funny. Lol.
I hope you feel better soon and are holding up okay now!
Date: January 12, 2021 05:30 pm Title: Worst Impressions
JJ. This was SO good. Pam is SUCH A BOSS and I adore it so much. And Jim originally seeming like a jerk who's too good for camp only to quickly become the goofy Jim we all know and love? I am here for it. I'm so curious on what happened with Roy. I hope you update this soon!!
Date: January 12, 2021 04:29 pm Title: Worst Impressions
This is all kinds of fun so far. I kind of like here at the start it's Jim vs. Pam rather than instant best friends. That being said the instant chemistry more than makes up for that.
Lovely way to get into the camp world. Brings me back to my days on Boy Scout and YMCA camp staffs. You really get the feel that the staff is there to heard chickens and cats, while blindfolded, next to a cliff. Good times.
Also seems like there's some history that both Jim and Pam are hiding/runnig from. Should be really interesting to see where it goes from here.