You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: June 26, 2022 08:51 pm Title: Chapter 26 - Boys and Girls

OH MY GOD. So much greatness in this chapter, I've been waiting for this one for a long time, Max and it did not disappoint!

*She knew time was still progressing and yet her sense of it felt irrelevant, the days ahead for her original life were preordained to exist much as they had been, as she remembered.

But now it was if she could feel time moving again. In the silence of the room, the ticks of the clock on the wall were thunderous, synchronized in step with her own beating heart that seemed almost as loud. No longer on a path she knew where was taking her, no more certain what her future had in store, she felt lost and unable to make decisions for the Pam that was that enclosed in the conference room. That Pam was still stuck in her past, acting without the knowledge she alone had.*

Beautiful.

*Plus, the incongruity of messages from her brain and her heart were like flies at a picnic, relentless in their increasingly loud buzzing and becoming harder to ignore. Better she be the fly, unnoticed on the wall, catching small bits of information through the interaction with Jim. She knew she couldn’t trust what her other self might be remembering anyway; that version had long since accepted there were flies in her life and was content to live with them.*

This is a great analogy. Makes me think of fireflies, if you know what I'm referring to :)

*What happened to the woman who stood up to him last night? Where had she gone?

She knew. The other Pam would soon be back, the one who let him crush her spirit and her ambitions in order to keep their relationship from becoming volatile and unstable.

But when did she learn to accept his dismissal of her aspirations?

When did she come to hide what she was all about because her dreams weren’t aligned with his?

When did she become so quick to follow in his wake, even when it wasn’t the direction she wanted to go?*

These are really great story beats. The momentum in this chapter is fab.

*Though he would never admit it, she knew he’d seen and loved everything the SNL alum starred in, most notably, The Wedding Singer, which she like to tease was the real number one movie on his desert island list and not When Harry Met Sally as he liked to claim.*

Okay, I knew you did this for me before I even read your author note and I love you for it.

*Though her other self still refused to see it, or perhaps she did now that Kelly so persistently pointed it out, but that her song with Roy was about a couple who didn’t wind up together was a big tell. That Jewel believed her lover would come back to her was almost as delusional as Pam thinking Roy still made her happy.*

Love that you brought this back and YES. So true!

*She needed to see Randall bend the rules to let her see what she missed and hear his words of wisdom so she could learn the future was not immutable, not because of time travel but because she could control it herself.*

God I wish this had really happened, that Pam could have been this brave after this episode. She was in such denial. Until recently I thought you weren't going to diverge from canon but I'm really happy you did (or at least it seems you will...?)

Wonderful chapter. Sad I'm out of jellies. Excited to see what's next!

Author's Response:

Thanks- really made my morning getting this review. It Took a long time to get to this chapter and I'm so glad it lived up.

So glad you recognized and appreciated my little nod to you - one of my fav things about writing on this site is the community vibe and dropping in little connections like that to other stories and writers.

You know I can't say....but there will be more that feels familiar and also some surprises.

Thank you again for your review.  

Reviewer: grc73 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 26, 2022 12:10 pm Title: Chapter 26 - Boys and Girls

Finally a breakthrough! This was a very satisfying chapter to read.

Author's Response:

Thanks Lady.

(if I'm not mistaken, the next few chapters are new to you too, hope you enjoy.)

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 25, 2022 05:14 pm Title: Chapter 26 - Boys and Girls

*Rolls neck around, stretches out hands, and hopes to all things good and JAM the radio here at work stays quiet for the time it takes to write this*

So we plunge right in here. Love that Pam is sneaking around like this. Trying to observe everything and get more information about it all. She's a very clever woman and it shows here how she's able to keep tabs on most everything and at the same time stay hidden. Her time as Jim's partner-in-crime have served her well.

Some longer thoughts to get things started for sure. I also really love that she turns to her art to start and focus things. I didn't get it at the time, but it was a nice bit of foreshadowing as to how she was going to try and hold onto everything she's gone through at this point in her journey.

Then she can get a look at herself talking to Jim and she sees how they both light each other up. I think she's realizing that she's never really been able to shine like that unless she's around Jim. Contrast that with how downtrodden she becomes after she talks to Roy about the internship. One man makes her burn like the sun, the other pulls in any light like a black hole. No wonder it's after that viewing that Future Pam finally comes to realize she needs to take that ring off her finger. I'm right there with you Future Pam. Where is the woman who held her own against Roy?

"What began as small observations and droplets of understanding had over the course of two weeks snowballed to an avalanche that with its collapse created this new Pam, somebody who had the strength to call off something she knew neither of the versions wanted any longer, even if only one of them knew it." *Grins* Thank you. The avalanche is here in full force for sure. While Past Pam might have been flattened by it, Future Pam though has some steel in her spine now. Even though there's a rush of snow and debris crashing around her, it feels like all that debris is stripping off the layers of denial and self doubt she's been holding onto. Roy is exposed as a guy who is still the same guy he was in high school. Only interested in her for what she can do for him in the relationship. Jim though (skipping ahead a bit but I think it still fits) is seen as someone who not only will stand by her during the onslaught of the avalanche but challenge her to continue to refine the steel she's forged and make it even stronger. Hard to see that for sure in the forging process, but it's there.

What I really loved the manifesto she creates for herself. Not just because of the image of the silver wings she got from that pilot ( ;) ) but because Future Pam here has really figured out what she wants and who she truly loves. She's being an active agent in her own life rather than letting life happen around her and I love it!

It's really no wonder that she breaks out in tears when she watches her and Jim fight. Also nice callback to canon Pam's final talking head. She's right, the signs have been there all along. It's feels like Future Pam has been ripped out of the show and she's now sitting with us the fans screaming at Past Pam at what's right there in front of her.

So now Future Pam knows where she wants her path to go and who she wants to walk down that path with. She's doing everything she can to do that, but the fog of the future is now on her. I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens with Past Pam finds that manifesto and what will happen because of it. Also finding out just what's up with Randall and Gabby. There's something there for sure.

Great job as usual and thanks for the shoutouts. Wish I still had some jellybeans to give this chapter.

Author's Response:

Argghh - working on my desktop when the power went out (for no apparent reason) and with it so did my internet and my response to your review. 

Anyway will try to remember what I had said. 

What a detailed review. Thanks to a quiet radio and to you. You really do have a pulse on what I am setting up here, so much so that it has impacted some of the writing. Thank you for that snowball/avalanche metaphor. It did work well here.

Yes, there is more to come. Let's see if Pam (which one you ask?) can retain her steely spine? TIME will tell. Okay I'm being cagey to try and keep some suspense as you have been as clearsighted here as Pam has become and very in tune with my foreshadowing. What I can say is your reviews are just so enjoyable to read.

Thank you ever so much.

Reviewer: MrsKHalpert Signed [Report This]
Date: June 25, 2022 01:26 pm Title: Chapter 26 - Boys and Girls

Gahhh I feel we’re so close and I can’t wait!

“She needed to understand she was the catalyst of her own happiness and while the whole world was singing songs and posting up signs to point her there, she had to be the one to make it happen.” YES PAM!! You can do it

Love the idea that she’s leaving herself this little journal entry so that she’ll have the courage to do everythjng!

Looking forward to the next update!!

Author's Response:

I know you like fun facts so here's one: I'm often inspired by music lyrics and this line came about after listening to No No No - Pumpin Blood. 

Just to clarify the journal entry is to make sure any changes she does make are not overturned when/if she no longer remembers being this other version of herself and doesn't remember what she is about to do. Like a secret message to herself to explain what she went through - a lot like Lucy has in 50 First Dates. (hope you saw the movie, it was sweet).

Thanks for your review and being so invested. Cheers. 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 25, 2022 12:22 pm Title: Chapter 26 - Boys and Girls

Okay, definitely accidentally refreshed halfway through, let's see how much of that review I can recreate.

The way Pam felt safer when she was unable to change things and desperately trying not to than now, when she's experiencing new things, is a *really* good use of genre to explore characterization.

This description of trying to hang onto dreams is Spot. On,

I'm just starting to get that Pam Prime has effectively time traveled into the future. Fun!

PAM'S POKER FACE. I love her being able to see what we all see again, and the call-forward is clever.

THE CHIPMUNK STORY!

Holy CRAP BREAKTHROUGH MOMENT FOR OUR PAM. MULTIPLE BREAKTHROUGH MOMENTS IN FACT.

I continue to really enjoy how you're giving Pam a chance to analyze her behavior the same way we all did, and let her reach the same conclusions.

Author's Response:

I hate when that happens - and it has happened more than once to me. 

Thanks first for all the typo pickups - I knew there were a lot and I do appreciate you catching them and so fast too. 

So that dream thing - I'm glad it came across, and don't you hate that. You know you had a dream - a good one - and you have no idea what it was and even if you could remember - either way - poof its gone and with it that amazing feeling you were in. I worried that part would not translate well. Works with nightmares too, that heart racing panic you have no idea why you wake up having, but that description is for another story (and I already know which one).

Not quite, but all the things she's doing in her travel to the past are having their effect on what the other her is experiencing in her present and effectively that's getting her to the future maybe a bit "ahead of schedule"?!?!?

You know how I like to meld my stories together and even bring in parts of other's too (always hoping it's viewed as intended as a tribute and not otherwise)

Thank you again for the editor's eye, and the review. It means the world.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 23, 2022 10:33 am Title: Chapter 25 - Back from Vacation

AHHHHHHH THE TIMELINES ARE CROSSING. PAM IS NOTICING THE DIFFERENCE. SHE FOUND THE COAT. MICHAEL IS IN A STATE OF SHENANIGANS. HELP. (I thought Michael tiredly forgetting not to show up to The Office was a nice nod to the incident during the MSPC arc.)

Katy still being right at the forefront of Pam's mind and the subtle ways her jealousy and feelings for Jim are poking their way through into her conscious is really deftly done. That's our denialist Pam.

I thought this was a quite tasty amuse-bouche!

Author's Response:

Yes, time travel is messy and Doc Brown and Randall and any other characters who said not to toy with future events were absolutely right in that it creates results like these. But if it's Dumbledore we are looking to as our guide, he was well aware this is the intention of the time travel anyway.

Yes, still jealous of Katy but there was another reason that whole but was there. Another layer yet to come.

Always appreciative for your reviews and excitement.

Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: June 22, 2022 09:59 pm Title: Chapter 25 - Back from Vacation

Looks like things are coming to a head... thank goodness for Randall (although I would have loved to see Toby catch them).

Agreed, the Jewel song is 100% a breakup song and it's so weird Pam never caught that. Roy, I can believe.

Perfect that Creed found her and called her Patricia!

Author's Response:

Creed, not explicitly part of the story but I think he knows too. Or is in a perpetual state of time travel himself. Or is just Creed.

Thanks as always for reviewing. 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 20, 2022 11:51 am Title: Chapter 25 - Back from Vacation

So Past Pam is feeling out of sorts. Makes sense considering the night she had after getting back. A fight with Roy and all the implications that brought. Though if I remember, Pam did stand up to Roy in that fight. I can also easily see her holding onto the emotions from the fight now in the morning. I can also see that Roy thinks the fight is over and he can just go about his day. Though considering he all but ignores Pam maybe he's got some lingering feelings too? My guess, if he is still feeling anything, it would still be resentment towards her considering how he acted. Past Pam is also noticing some of the changes that have been going on. The furniture askew, the extra coat, disheveled Michael. She is an artist after all and has an eye for detail. Thing is even if she can see the details, the big picture sometimes eludes her, especially with her tendence to stuff feelings into boxes.

Future Pam though has had no choice but to look into some of those boxes. She's got the details and more and more the big picture is becoming clearer. Another big point is her realizing what the song is about. So, she's getting better at realizing what's what in her life.

It doesn't quite feel like the avalanche has hit yet, but it's clearly getting closer. Only a matter of time before no matter what she does it'll hit full force. Yet, Future Pam is now wiser, sees clearer, and to a degree has a bit more steel to her spine. Really looking forward to seeing how it holds up. Nice job.

Author's Response:

I am trying to get what was meant to be the rest of this chapter out as soon as I can, because of all you point out and you'll see a few nods to things you've said (and written) and I'm anxious for you to see what they are. 

In the meantime- YES, YES, YES (TWSS in this response too).

Thanks for the continued investment in this one and your reviews always. They always make me happy to read. 

 

Reviewer: MrsKHalpert Signed [Report This]
Date: June 19, 2022 10:54 pm Title: Chapter 25 - Back from Vacation

If this was the amuse-bouche, I can’t wait for the main course!!!! Please update soon! I’m on tenterhooks here!!

Author's Response:

I'm working hard to get it up. TWSS. 

Thanks for the review. 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: June 07, 2022 01:12 am Title: Chapter 24 - A New Twist on Randall's Theory

"Distant memories of good times with Roy were now interrupted by Jim’s ‘may I cut in’ as thoughts of him flooded the crowded dance floor that was her mind." I love this metaphor. You can just picture that image so clearly.

"Despite the locking door she hadn’t been sure she could get completely undressed with Michael anywhere in the building." This seems... VERY wise.

Okay. Randall nearly got me there. That would have been *extremely* complicated. Not that this isn't... what else have you changed, Pam??? What have you lost???

"There among more of the same binders that were piled on the shelves, some old plaques and framed artwork was a half empty bottle of Wild Turkey and a leather and metal strap contraption attached to a small red ball." MEREDITH. AND WHY IN THE OFFICE????

"“I see time like a rubber band, for the most part it, the band will snap back. However, I amend my original statements on the matter. When you stretch it too much, at some point it will lose its elasticity and won't stretch anymore or any longer.” NOT GOOD. And I appreciate you putting this back in perspective... Pam's going to get to where she's supposed to be.

Okay. A LOT of food on the table. Looking forward to seeing how it all gets eaten.

Author's Response:

Sorry for the delay but always want to make sure you hear back. Reviews always such a treat and getting yours are always so fun to read.

Of course at this point it's hard to comment much about what's to come but you know at least that one thing you nailed on the head already. 

Time travel theories vary wildly the more stories, movies and shows you watch and I find them all fascinating - but this goes for time travel and life in general - there's only so much you can stretch before you can't any longer. (time travel perhaps just exacerbates the process).

Thank you again for the review.  

 

Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: June 04, 2022 10:05 pm Title: Chapter 24 - A New Twist on Randall's Theory

First Darryls' sex sheets and now Meredith's sex closet? What has gotten into you, Max? (Kidding, never stop)

*Back at home in a basket in the bathroom there were a bunch of hair bands that were exactly as he described, stretched too many times around her wavy tresses they could no longer be used, their stretch pushed past the limit . She wasn't sure why she didn't just throw them out when they got to that point but for some reason, she tossed them back into the basket every time and now the useless ones outnumbered the ones that she might use to pull her hair up. Good thing she didn’t sport a ponytail very often.*

Your metaphors are always so poignant and beautiful. :)

Author's Response: Sorry but Meredith is kinky.  


So that passage was metaphorical but also an accurate description of what is currently happening in my bathroom drawer.  And I do wear my hair up often. I am also not sure why I don’t throw them out.  
Thanks for your reviews and the advice and chats on the side. 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 04, 2022 05:15 pm Title: Chapter 24 - A New Twist on Randall's Theory

To quote "Lord of the Rings." it's the deep breath before the plunge. Or maybe to use my avalanche metaphor, she's stopped trying to outrun the snow, has turned to face it, and in a moment of calm, closed her eyes and said to herself, "whatever's going to happen will happen. Let it come."

That being said there's something there at the start that did peak my interest. Regardless of how hard she might have tried, thoughts of Roy vs Jim are out and are very much there. The image of a dance floor and Jim asking to cut in seems appropriate.

So, has the rubber band stretched past it's stretchiness? Is it still being pulled to past its breaking point? Right now, really there's only one thing she/we can do. Await the dawn.

Author's Response:

Thanks Warrior for your review. Not much to say but, yes. Boxes or not, it's hard to put something out of your mind when its weight is getting to much to bear. But all you can do is try and wait for what's next.

Thanks for always dropping in to share your thoughts. I do enjoy hearing them so.

 

Reviewer: MrsKHalpert Signed [Report This]
Date: June 04, 2022 02:37 pm Title: Chapter 24 - A New Twist on Randall's Theory

This chapter was definitely an enjoyable read! You’ve got me on the edge of my seat for what is about to come next, I can’t wait!

Author's Response:

Glad you enjoyed. Big stuff ahead.

Thanks for reviewing! 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed 1 [Report This]
Date: May 31, 2022 06:17 pm Title: Chapter 23 - Packer Patrol

So...........that was a lot to take in. Now I'll also admit it's been a few days since I read this chapter and writing this review, so I may have forgotten some of my initial feelings and thoughts. That being said lots to unpack here.

Big forward movement in the plot. Just when Pam is feeling discombobulated from seeing how Roy treats her art, the Time Turner breaks and she sees how Roy has been treating Past Pam. The rage and anger he's shown. First with the road rage, the arguments over the missing money, him saying she ruined the vacation after said vacation was over about something he never paid attention to anyway in regards to the earing. Kind of tears apart her thoughts from last chapter that Roy picking on her is "just in jest." Roy isn't joking around, he means what he says even when he is misguided.

Then she finds Jim's hidden treasures. Oh wow, does that set off a host of everything. As you wrote, he doesn't just like her. He cherishes her. I loved the use of the Pensive imagery. I've often thought that had Pam really had some objective outside perspective, she might have realized sooner how wrong Roy was for her and how right Jim was for her. She's clearly gotten that perspective over these past two weeks. All the discussions with Randall and Gabby. The overheard conversations on the Booze Cruise. It feels like it's been leading her to the moment where she finally understands just how deep Jim's feelings are for her and how deep hers are for him. Thing is, you've written this latest revelation with subtly. After all, they're just doodles. At least that's what Roy would say. But clearly Jim's not Roy. He cares about her and that one thing that makes her so special. Michael has already set up how important her artwork is. So, she's already got it in her mind that her creativity is important. With Roy, it's a hobby that lets him break away for a bar night and a scrap of paper to write down notes. For Jim her artwork, is worth their weight in gold. Until now she might have just said, "oh they're just doodles I do when I'm bored." I doubt she'll ever draw another doodle again with that mentality. Now that she knows what they mean to Jim and all the implications that go with them. Loved seeing that play out.

Pam's journey with Michael is another great piece that's really starting to come together. It feels like she's really seeing the core of who Michael is. A guy who wants desperately to belong and to surround himself with those who want him around too. In that regard it makes sense why he clings so hard to Packer. Packer might have been one of the few people in Michael's early professional career that not only tolerated him,but wanted him around. I have no doubt that for Packer the only reason he wanted Michael around was for a host of selfish reasons rather than a healthy friendship. For attention and affection starved Michael that means attaching himself to someone who is clearly a toxic personality. Pam rightly calls him out on it. When Michael refuses to let go. I mean who hear doesn't want to scream at Pam right then to look in the mirror for herself. Now, granted she's tired with all this mental and physical wrangling she's had to do. Yet I also get the feeling that these thoughts will stick with her.

But where do we go from here. Now we're REALLY in uncharted waters. Packer's deposit wasn't left. So now Roy upstairs all day and no Michael to steal Jim's chair. Future Pam also has all of Past Pam's memories and two weeks of soul searching under her belt. Really feels like the pace is picking up. I mentioned a while ago an allusion of a snowball rolling downhill to create an avalanche. Well, the avalanche is here and it's only getting bigger and sucking more snow and debris into it. I get the feeling that before long Pam might need to reach out a hand to help her get above the cascade. But who will be there to grab it? Who will she want to have grab it? Roy? Jim? Michael? Randall? Gabby? Or will she be able to fight her way to the side of the slide herself and in so doing realize she's has the strength all along to chart her own course in life?

Great job for what feels like a hugely important chapter for her.

Author's Response:

 

All I can really say is YES! So much coming to focus for Pam - and yet she is still stuck in the past both literally and figuratively.  Even canon Pam was still stuck when he professed his love and then kissed her like he did. SHe needed time (in my head it was always about two weeks before she came to her senses and then it was too late)...hhmmm, how long have they been back now?

I love your insights about Packer too. And I had always contended this would be a Pam/Michael relationship growth story too so I love you are picking up on that.

Your avalanche theory is spot on. One chapter of the calm before the ----actually I'll say no more. I hope to have it up soon.

THANK YOU so much for your review and your support as I start the process of bringing this full circle. As you know, the reviews are so encouraging and ones like these are a huge boost.

  

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2022 04:15 pm Title: Chapter 23 - Packer Patrol

The duality of Michael on full display all over this chapter. From wildly insensitive to wildly encouraging in two seconds flat. And I kind of wish we'd gotten to see him doing this improv act when he hung up the picture in the office in canon now.

The Michael-Trelawney connection is spectacular and not one I'd thought of before.

And there's something real interesting here about how Pam has shifted her view of Michael... because we *know* she goes through this evolution over time, it's all just been speeded up because of the time travel. Wonder if that's going to happen to certain other of her relationships...

OH CRAP. THEY BROKE THE TIME TURNER. THE TIMELINES ARE RECONNECTING. SHE FOUND OUT JIM SAVED HER DOODLES. PAM BEING FORCED TO COME TO GRIPS WITH HER FEELINGS FOR JIM. THERE IS A LOT HAPPENING HERE.

"Un-superglue Michael’s hand from the desk." Lol.

In fairness, Pam, you know what's kind of a sign? YOU BEING SENT BACK IN TIME TO DISCOVER A BUNCH OF STUFF ABOUT JIM AND ROY. Furiously frustrating woman.

And after all that time, they fail to change another major canon event. BUT. I am very excited to see what happens now that they're about to encounter a fresh new day.

Author's Response:

Isn't this just like him- he means well but sometimes he just says the wrong thing and yet sometimes he says just the right thing.

Exactly what I was going for - the Pam/Michael relationship to happen in a sped up timeline.

She had to find those doodles and for that to happen I needed her to need glue, and well s#*t happens (not on the carpet though) but seeing what's happening in her other existence is very important to her growth.

Thanks always for coming on to review- big stuff about to happen and I'm thrilled you are here for it and appreciate it.



Author's Response:

Isn't this just like him- he means well but sometimes he just says the wrong thing and yet sometimes he says just the right thing.

Exactly what I was going for - the Pam/Michael relationship to happen in a sped up timeline.

She had to find those doodles and for that to happen I needed her to need glue, and well s#*t happens (not on the carpet though) but seeing what's happening in her other existence is very important to her growth.

Thanks always for coming on to review- big stuff about to happen and I'm thrilled you are here for it and appreciate it.

Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: May 29, 2022 07:49 am Title: Chapter 23 - Packer Patrol

*“In the words of the King…” he went on…

“A little less conversation, a little more action. Seriously, I could carve out a space for you in my Caf? Disco where you can paint and put up a little gallery. We could host some pancake breakfasts with the artist.”

Once again, Michael’s words turned her insides to mush causing her to blink back tears from her lashes.

“Serve them up with a little espresso,” he said the word both correct and with a slurred southern drawl.

Despite her attempts to keep them contained, the droplets fell from out of the corners of her eyes as she began to laugh and cry simultaneously.

For once Michael stayed serious, as serious as he could while doing a poor impersonation of the famous pompadour-coiffed entertainer.

“Mark my words little lady, you keep at it and you’ll do very well. I see it very clearly. You have a future to go after if you just never ever, ever give up.”*

*Never before had she had the opportunity to witness his vulnerability, or feel his loneliness, or get a sense of the genuinely kind heart he had. It was only through this experience she was able to observe how he saw the best in his people and wanted to inspire them to achieve greatness all while still showing them a fun time while doing it. It was only through the intimate moments they had on the boat, at the library, the ice-skating rink and during their lunches, out and at her home, that she came to see more than just the immaturity and idiocy that until now she’d thought were his most defining traits. She knew now, he was so much more than he seemed.*

It's not necessarily a Jim/Pam story... it's a Pam/Michael story, and the lessons she's learning are working their way into her subconscious regardless of what she's going to end up changing/ remembering. Yet again, I really adore the way you write Pam and Michael together.

*Despite reflexively thumbing the scale, which she realized she'd been doing for years, it wasn't enough to keep all the weight of the recent days from tipping the other side down. And yet, she still felt paralyzed, locked into the life she had settled on when she put on Roy's jersey and posed for the photo that still hung in his locker.*

This is beautiful.

I love the idea that she is/ has been actively ignoring her feelings for Jim and she's deciding to pay more attention to them now, letting them take over. It remains my contention that S2 Pam is very much aware of how she feels about Jim, her self-confidence level (and the fact that he tells her he's completely over his crush) are what allow her to convince herself he doesn't feel the same way, and never even entertain the possibility of actually being with him. Then CN shoots all of that to shit. (This isn't a direct commentary on your chapter, just my own personal musings.)

*What fell from her eyes was the joy of knowing she was cherished, not by Roy but by Jim, but with that joy came the fear that her whole life was meant to change, had to change, and she still didn’t know if she had the strength to make it happen no matter how much she wanted it to.*

UGH UGH this is painfully beautiful! I'm ready for the home stretch here, Max! Please don't keep us waiting long!

Author's Response:

I did say at some point this story was not just about Jam but about the Michael/Pam relationship (which I have a soft spot for) and Pam's growth in general. 

I agree - a lot of what she knew and felt got buried until CN unearthed it - but even then she couldn't act immediately. She still needed time- I figure she needed about 2 weeks, so that's what I gave her here.

Thank you for all your support with this story. Reviews and beans have meant the world to me as I put this out there. 

It should be long now - the final chapters I hope to post faster now that the whole tale is mapped out.

Thanks again. 

Reviewer: grc73 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 28, 2022 01:51 pm Title: Chapter 23 - Packer Patrol

Nice strikethrough! And finally, Pam has come to her senses!

Author's Response:

You have no idea what those strikethroughs mean to me (or how hard they were to do- at one point the whole story was crossed out).

 

Pam -starting to at least, - she'd not quite there  but a lot closer than she was - maybe she needs and enthusiastic push. 

Thanks for the review. 

Reviewer: MrsKHalpert Signed [Report This]
Date: May 19, 2022 10:34 am Title: Chapter 22 - Espresso and Popcorn

Well this was an interesting read!!
As much as I obviously don’t want Pam to get cheated on, I was kinda like ‘nooo’ when it turned out Roy hadn’t used that condom because I was so sure that was going to be a confrontational point there.
As gross as the thought of sleeping on other people’s sex sheets are 🤢 I think you totally nailed early seasons Darryl where he was just a bit of a douche really.
Pam finding the artwork (loved the clueless references) again I was like ‘nooo Roy has redeeming qualities’ but then to find out he uses it for Fantasy Football kinda crushed me for Pam.
If you couldn’t tell, I hate Roy 🤣
Looking forward to the next update!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: May 19, 2022 10:20 am Title: Chapter 22 - Espresso and Popcorn

“And they always seem unhappy to see me here when they show up. I don't get it.” Oh, Michael. I love that you worked in an "actually" moment for Oscar, too.

"the chill in her bones after seeing her fianc? hard to shake without something to warm her back up from the inside." Oh, Pam. Michael offering to go shirtless so she won't be cold is classic Michael. I hadn't even thought about the potential chaos of Michael in the warehouse unsupervised. Daryl must think he's going nuts right now.

Hmm. I initially thought this was a nice grace note for Roy with the card being in his locker, but paired with the photo and sandwiched by all the disrespect Pam described, hard not to think the real theme here is "the wave runners" rather than Pam's art. Although putting it in terms of his immaturity is a kindness still... maybe his future is just about him growing up.

HOT. TO. TROT.

The combination of relief and disconcertion at the explanation of the condom (and the book) holds up well, I think. And it's consistent with the picture you're painting of Roy as a guy who needs to grow up more than anything else... very high school moves.

OW. Okay, how is that reveal worse than finding out he was (potentially) cheating???

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 19, 2022 10:15 am Title: Chapter 22 - Espresso and Popcorn

It's the cold that does it for me here in this chapter. Pam is trying to will herself warm with thoughts of Roy, but there's this insidious cold that just keeps coming back. Roy keeps a really good shot of himself in his locker, the only picture of Pam he has is from high school. Yes he has a card she drew him, but it's only as a place for him to jot down his fantasy football scores. Now she's found out he's letting his buddies use their most private area as a place for random hook-ups. I mean all these red flags are just screaming at her. Roy doesn't value her, he doesn't value her time, her interests, or even the space they supposedly call home. That making fun of her "in jest" is actually just making fun of her. Using ridiculous amounts of body spray. She is so right. Roy hasn't grown up past middle or high school. So he's not a cheater. Ok that's nice. There's a lot more to a healthy relationship than just not cheating. And Roy's not ticking any of those boxes.

I do have to wonder though. Is this a set up for a comparison chapter? I'd have to go back and re-read what she was feeling when she saw the note from Jim about what she missed the past week. Will there be other things she'll find out in her semi-private explorations of the office when no one's around? Ways Jim does value her, her art, her friendship, etc.

I think you got the portrayal of Darryl right here. Early season Darryl very much seemed to want to be one of the guys. I think you're right that it was when Roy finally left Dunder Mifflin that there was a change in his character. He didn't have his jock buddy to pull stuff like that with anymore. Maybe he also realized he needed to be there more for his daughter and couldn't be the wild stallion he was during youth.

Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: May 19, 2022 08:37 am Title: Chapter 22 - Espresso and Popcorn

Well this chapter had quite a few ups and downs for Pam. Every time she thinks she's found something she can love about Roy, there's always a reason to second guess herself. Wake up, lady!

*It was her, a photographic representation of the girl that once existed back some years ago, a snapshot from their high school days. In it, her hair was shorter but just as frizzy, her cheeks fuller, her smile wider. She had on his football jersey over her turtleneck, the garment so big it seemed to dwarf her smaller frame.

The old photograph was faded, the colors now muted and broken down from the years of exposure. Still seeing it was like a having another Time Turner in that it had her traveling further back in time to when their romance first began. When she felt like the luckiest girl in their school because he, who could have dated his pick of girls, had chosen her.*

I love this, because I imagine a great deal of Pam's reluctance to see Roy for who he is today is her inability to let go of who he was before.

Michael in the bubble wrap (and Tiki Barber) were great!

Okay... Darryl. I agree with you that he grew and changed quite a bit post-Roy, and it doesn't necessarily seem like something OOC for him to do. But it still grossed me out that he'd need their bed for some reason and that Roy would let him do it. Ew.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: May 11, 2022 12:14 pm Title: Part III - Chapter 21. Boxes and Cracks

This is an interesting hint of possible things to come at the beginning here, a twist on the formula - this isn't just about Pam learning things via time travel she otherwise wouldn't know but also about her strategies for shoving down her unhappiness and confusion failing under the excess burdens of living a double(d) life. And you quickly see it all piling up - the symbolic blue earring going missing again, the extra Michael time.

"If life were a movie, it would be time for the fairy godmother or guardian angel or mysterious stranger to show up to tell her what to do." This is a very Pam line.

For the record, I don't think Gabby or anyone associated with the camera crew in any way is as unbiased as Pam thinks they are with regards to the J sitch.

"She never thought about it before but if they failed, she might find herself in a permanent loop, stuck on a M?bius strip of time, just like Bill Murray, but instead of repeating February 2nd, she’d be forced into reliving a full two weeks over and over and it wouldn’t be with Andie MacDowell, who she had a bit of a girl crush on once upon a time, but Michael Scott she’d be trapped with for all eternity." That. Is. HORRIFYING. Although again... not much different than her current life.

Jim's note summarizing the major events that happened in her absence is a sweet and very realistic detail.

WAIT. PLOT TWIST. PAM IS OFFICIALLY IMPACTING HER OWN LIFE. (And in multiple ways, too! I caught the reference to the missing cash.) OKAY. THIS IS NOT A DRILL, PEOPLE.

Author's Response:

It's getting harder to respond to your reviews without giving away details to those who are maybe not as clued in but you are getting warmer - and that's a hint about next chapter - coming out today (i hope).

Thanks always for all the excitement and reviews. 

Reviewer: tinydundie Signed [Report This]
Date: May 11, 2022 10:38 am Title: Part III - Chapter 21. Boxes and Cracks

GROUNDHOG DAY!

Okay Jim's note was adorable. I like to believe he would do something like that and she would appreciate it.

*“What earring?” Roy asked coming back into the bedroom, hand down his boxers, scratching himself.*

Well, thanks for that image.

I love the significance of the earring and how it seems to continually be trying to tell Pam something.

*All these little cracks in her relationship, the ones she thought would go away, they were not repairing themselves but rather seemed to be splintering in the last two weeks.

She never stopped to think they had not been brought about from waiting on a wedding, but perhaps they were there from the start. That they were faults in the foundation itself.*

YES. Wake up, Pam!

Author's Response:

Sorry to paint that image - but Roy is a pig right. At least Jim is making up for it with cute notes.

As always thanks for the review. 

Reviewer: MrsKHalpert Signed [Report This]
Date: May 11, 2022 05:58 am Title: Part III - Chapter 21. Boxes and Cracks

Oh this is fun that we’ve caught up to the other Pam. I loved how just as she found the earring, it’s gone again. Loved the bit about the missing money - oh other other Pam!!
Looking forward to more

Author's Response:

Thanks MrsK.

Glad to hear you enjoy other Pam is getting some fire. Takes a little meddling with the universe but at least she is.

Thanks again so much. 

Reviewer: warrior4 Signed [Report This]
Date: May 11, 2022 05:37 am Title: Part III - Chapter 21. Boxes and Cracks

So once more I find myself being very perplexed. Future Pam and Michael are out to prevent Packer from doing what Packer does. Not sure how successful they'll be at that because well, Packer seems to just bullrush over Michael but who knows? Future Pam is also trying to get back to an even keel, but all those boxes are still overflowing, or the lids are just barely on. I don't think it'll take much for something to shift and they all come crashing down. How she reacts to that crash will be quite the read, what with the last two weeks of soul searching she's been doing.

Past Pam is also acting up as well. Rather than just blowing off the argument, she stands her ground. Seems like Past Pam is getting some steel in her spine, even if it feels hard. Sounds like she's been doing some soul searching too. And she's not really liking what she's seeing. Roy's default is anger when there's a perceived injustice. Just like when they were driving to the bar he reacts with aggression, and it doesn't feel like there's any changing his mind. Hard but good thoughts there Past Pam. What would that look like going into a marriage? Seems like Past Pam's vision is starting to become a little more clear as well if she's having thoughts that the foundation of their relationship is cracked not just surface level stuff.

So how does this all reconcile? Past Pam is thinking things that seem to be affecting how her future thoughts would travel. Meanwhile at the same time Future Pam is actively trying to change the future. Like I said, all those boxes seem to be teetering and just ready to cascade down on her.

Author's Response:

Exactly why Pam can't leave him alone and needs to keep it together a little bit longer- we will see how that goes.

A lot of good insights Warrior.

 

Thanks always for sharing your thoughts - I'm always so excited to read your reviews.

 

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans