pamisgreat: Hey Jim. It's Pam, if you can't tell from the screenname. I just got it to boost my self-esteem.

jimh2: pbees3 wasn't working for you?

pamisgreat: pbees3 lacks pizzaz. And uniqueness, since apparently there is a pbees1 and pbees2.

Her eyes kept glued on the screen, but she didn't even see the 'jimh2 is typing a message...' on the bottom of the window. He must be busy actually working. He wasn't nearly as attentive to her IM's as he used to be, so she didn't even bother to spy on his screen to see what he was up to.

When she heard the ding signifying a new conversation, she was caught a bit off-guard.

jimisawesome: i was inspired.

A wide smile spread across her face as she quickly typed a reply.

pamisgreat: We're a couple of narcissists, aren't we?

jimisawesome: nah. we're just confident.

pamisgreat: Ah, I see.

pamisgreat: P.S. I am bored out of my mind.

jimisawesome: me too. although i'm still recovering from yesterday's shenanigans.

pamisgreat: I never pegged you as the type to use 'shenanigans' but oh god yes, that was INSANE! Reminded me of the old days, though.

jimisawesome: i don't recall michael threatening suicide in "the old days"

pamisgreat: LOL You know what I mean!

jimisawesome: yeah. it was nice, actually. i like seeing everyone actually having fun together though.

pamisgreat: I suppose you're choosing to ignore Angela's preaching about the sins of gambling? She was livid all day.

jimisawesome: as opposed to... ?

pamisgreat: Hey I have actually seen Angela happy before!

jimisawesome: when was this?

pamisgreat: Oh, we went for coffee when you all had sales calls.

jimisawesome: you went for coffee with angela?!

pamisgreat: She invited me!

jimisawesome: so why haven't you guys haven't been all buddy-buddy since?

pamisgreat: She offered me one of her cats-- the dominant male of her new litter or something-- and I turned her down.

jimisawesome: ouch

pamisgreat: I wouldn't know what to do with a cat! I would have been a terrible owner. I probably would have tried to take him home in a cooler or something and Angela would shun me or kill me or... I don't even know what.

jimisawesome: do you remember when i had that bbq at my house?

pamisgreat: What? That's out of the blue, Halpert.

Jim's phone rang.

jimisawesome: gotta take that

Pam thought she should take the opportunity to get to work, as well. Jim was such a distraction. Not that she wouldn't be playing solitaire if he wasn't there. She couldn't really focus on work, anyway, as she tried to figure out the link between Angela and cats and Jim's barbecue last year. Except... that was around when she started having suspicions about her and Dwight, right? She'd told Jim about it, even! Did he know they were together?

jimisawesome: i just made an excellent sale, by the way. what did you accomplish in the last five minutes?

pamisgreat: I was trying to figure out where that question came from.

jimisawesome: what

jimisawesome: oh, bbq? just curious. that was like a year ago, right?

pamisgreat: Does this have to do with Angela?

jimisawesome: ... no?

pamisgreat: Do you know something about her? Her and perhaps a certain someone?

jimisawesome: a certain someone with a spud gun?

pamisgreat: OMG!!! I am so glad someone else knows about this I have been keeping it to myself for so long it's like I'm Joey on Friends!!!

jimisawesome: haha, what?

pamisgreat: Don't tell me you don't enjoy cheesy 90s sitcoms, Halpert!

jimisawesome: i do, i do. i admit it. i know exactly what you're referencing.

pamisgreat: I knew it!

pamisgreat: So, DWIGHT AND ANGELA!!!

jimisawesome: yes. i was witness to quite a graphic make-out session.

pamisgreat: asdlfkjaklsd;!!!

jimisawesome: such eloquence.

pamisgreat: Don't make fun! It's shocking! I'm shocked! And I've only been keeping this to myself for like FOREVER! Although I think Ryan might know.

jimisawesome: nobody else?

pamisgreat: Not that I'm aware.

jimisawesome: wow. over a year...

pamisgreat: I KNOW!

jimisawesome: god, it's so sad to think that they probably have a more healthy and stable relationship than i do.

pamisgreat: What's that mean?

jimisawesome: i know we're not as close as we used to be but seriously, does it seem to you like things are really working out with karen?

pamisgreat: I guess... not.

jimisawesome: she told me last night she wanted to transfer.

pamisgreat: Really?

jimisawesome: she doesn't like it here and when i didn't try to talk her out of it, she got pretty pissed.

jimisawesome: i don't know why i'm telling you all this.

pamisgreat: No no, you can talk to me. Always. So is it over or... ?

jimisawesome: not yet, but... i know this sounds shitty, but i'm not going to fight for her. and i know that when i don't, that'll be it. it's just.. not worth it, you know?

pamisgreat: Believe me Halpert, I know.

jimisawesome: yeah. but i never really loved her. it's not the same, i guess.

pamisgreat: Perhaps it's more the same than you think. This is terrible of me to say, but I haven't been IN love with Roy for a long time. Longer than I care to admit, even to myself. Trying to make a relationship work when your heart's not in it isn't worth it, especially if it's somewhere else.

She winced at her last line, sending it before realizing what it said. He probably wouldn't notice, anyway. She wondered if it really took a long time for him to reply or if it just felt that way since she was dying in anticipation.

jimisawesome: that definitely makes it hard

pamisgreat: Am I a terrible person for thinking "that's what she said" in the middle of this serious conversation?

jimisawesome: no. i was thinking it too.

pamisgreat: :)

She hated herself for it typing a smiley face when she really meant 'I love you'.

jimisawesome: so... yeah, i guess now you know all about my personal life.

pamisgreat: At least you HAVE a personal life. I've been on ONE date since ending things-- my only first date since high school! I know I got back with Roy and you think we'll end up together and blah blah blah but I seriously only did that because I was lonely. It wasn't even romantic, it just felt like settling. Which it was, so I guess I shouldn't be complaining...

jimisawesome: i'm sorry for being snarky about that, it was out of line.

pamisgreat: It's okay, I probably deserved it. It was a stupid mistake to keep going back to him but he's the only one who's always THERE, you know? He's always been there and it's really hard when I'm that lonely to not just give into it.

pamisgreat: God I sound pathetic.

jimisawesome: no you don't.

jimisawesome: you want to know why i honestly got together with karen?

She couldn't formulate a response, and hoped it was a rhetoric question.

jimisawesome: fear. if you're pathetic, i don't know what that makes me.

pamisgreat: Fear? Of what?

jimisawesome: ... you?

pamisgreat: You're with Karen to protect you if I try to beat you up?

He laughed despite himself.

jimisawesome: no, not exactly.

jimisawesome: i should probably get back to work, but we should keep up these little chats. i miss talking to you all the time.

pamisgreat: Me too. Talk to you later.

Pam spent the rest of the day agonizing over the meaning of his words. It sounded like he was still... interested. Maybe. She decided to just let things flow-- best not to force anything upon him when he was in the middle of a break-up, anyway.

Despite her resolution, she spent the rest of the workday in agony over how to casually start conversation up with him again. Every attempt at instant messaging lead in deleting every line and sighing angrily. But it was in fact in the middle of a frustrated grunt that she heard someone clearing their throat above her.

"Oh, hey, didn't see you," she said, her tone slightly frantic as she looked up to the subject of her anxiety.

"I just need some toner for the copier and I was wondering if you could open the supply closet for me."

Her eyes went wide as she bit her lip, blushing furiously, her hands trembling as she tried to formulate an adequate response. He merely looked confused, which made the situation that much worse.

"Sorry, um, yeah, I actually, uh, I don't have the key, uh..." Her attempts to form a coherent sentence were failing miserably.

"It's not, uh, actually that important. I didn't mean to--" Her face was confused and embarrassed, and quite frankly a little desperate, so he just patted her desk and walked off to his own.

pamisgreat: I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry

jimisawesome: ok i have to ask: what the hell was that, beesly?

pamisgreat: NOTHING!

jimisawesome: nothing?

pamisgreat: It was seriously just stupid.

jimisawesome: ok now i'm really curious.

pamisgreat: I told you, it's nothing. Just a stupid little thing.

jimisawesome: so it's nothing but it's a little thing?

pamisgreat: ... yes? *innocent*

jimisawesome: c'mon, pam. spill.

pamisgreat: no no no no

jimisawesome: yes yes yes yes

pamisgreat: It's really embarrassing.

jimisawesome: please

pamisgreat: It'll make things awkward.

jimisawesome: please

pamisgreat: It's really stupid and not even worth telling.

jimisawesome: but i'm really really curious now. practically DYING of curiosity, some might say

jimisawesome: please

pamisgreat: Don't pressure me!

jimisawesome: sorry

jimisawesome: but... please? you say it's nothing and that it's stupid so just... c'mon.

jimisawesome: I promise not to laugh.

pamisgreat: PROMISE?

jimisawesome: pinky swear

pamisgreat: ok

pamisgreat: No. I'm sorry it's just embarrassing!

jimisawesome: fine, leave me in agony.

jimisawesome: i'll just sit here, wasting away...

jimisawesome: dying of curiosity...

pamisgreat: Such a DRAMA QUEEN!

jimisawesome: i'll wither away into nothing...

jimisawesome: i hope you've prepared a good speech for my funeral because it'll be all your fault

pamisgreat: GOD, FINE! You're like a five year old, honestly!

jimisawesome: *innocent*

pamisgreat: Fine fine fine. It's just that... this is so embarrassing!  Have I used the word 'embarassing' enough to convey how I feel about this?

jimisawesome: hey, no backing out now, beesly!

pamisgreat: ok ok. It's just that I have this fantasy that involves you saying those exact words. I was actually thinking about it earlier.

pamisgreat: SDFJJLKDFLSDASD I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST ADMITTED TO THAT

pamisgreat: please please please forget it

pamisgreat: Jim?

jimisawesome: wow

jimisawesome: so... what happens next in this fantasy?

pamisgreat: Let's just drop it. I am so embarrassed. Just forget it.

pamisgreat: But if you really want to know you'll just have to see for yourself.

jimisawesome: there's a flaw to that plan

She feels herself die a little and she's not sure if it's from embarrassment, frustration, heartbreak, or a little bit of everything.

jimisawesome: actually, two. 1) last time i tried, you just got all nervous and 2) the copy machine actually needs toner.

pamisgreat: Oh this fantasy definitely ends with toner in the copy machine ;)

God, what did that even mean? The wink at least made it look flirtatious, right?

jimisawesome: i don't really get the innuendo there

Dammit.

pamisgreat: Sorry, I'm a terrible flirt.

pamisgreat: And by that I mean I am terrible at it, not that I am terribly flirtatious.

jimisawesome: you don't give yourself enough credit

pamisgreat: Um. Ok.

pamisgreat: I think this conversation has taken a turn for the awkward...

jimisawesome: ... yeah maybe.

jimisawesome: so... how about that weather, eh?

She grinned.

pamisgreat: Karen looks extra pissed today.

jimh2: yeaaaaah...

pamisgreat: Want to talk about it? You don't have to, but you know, I'm here.

pamisgreat: P.S. What happened to jimisawesome? Doubting yourself? Jim you ARE awesome, let me tell you!

jimh2: oh yeah i forgot about the new screenname. habit i guess. suitable since i don't feel too awesome.

pamisgreat: Case of the grumpies?

pamisgreat: Sorry that sounded condescending, didn't it? Andy is rubbing off on me. Sorry, "Drew".

jimh2: it's okay. and i don't really think there's much to talk about. karen's transferring in like 2 days or something. for the best, i guess.

jimh2: and i've never admitted this to anyone but whenever i break up or something i like to listen to 'alone again, naturally' over and over until i realize how stupid it is to feel sorry for myself. i can't get it out of my head.

He heard a stiffled giggle from the general area of reception.

jimh2: hey!

pamisgreat: Sorry, that's just cute!

jimh2: i have to admit i would really love to hear it right now.

pamisgreat: Want me to start singing?

A light hum floated through the office and this time it was Jim who laughed.

jimh2: thanks, but i'm a grown man. i can handle it.

pamisgreat: Naturally.

jimh2: we shall never speak of this again.

pamisgreat: Noted.

pamisgreat: So if you don't want to talk about Karen... maybe we can talk about... hmm...

jimh2: the increasing lack of funds for scranton's public education system?

pamisgreat: Oh yes, I am very concerned about this compelling issue.

jimh2: wait, are the schools really underfunded?

pamisgreat: I don't know. Probably.

jimh2: hmm. well, i as well am very concerned. for the children.

pamisgreat: For the children!

jimh2: i think we have exhausted this topic.

pamisgreat: No, already? I have LOADS to say about issues I know nothing about.

jimh2: don't you care at all about your hometown, pam beesly?

pamisgreat: I care more about, you know, the war... global warming... overpopulation... poverty... hunger... lack of potable water... HIV/AIDS... But your right, affluent suburban families need their kids to get the best.

jimh2: damn straight

pamisgreat: I have to pee but I'm actually too lazy to get up.

jimh2: wow, that's incredibly lazy

pamisgreat: I know... I don't have to go that badly.

jimh2: oh

pamisgreat: ...

jimh2: ?

pamisgreat: We sure are good with conversation.

jimh2: sorry, i'm out of it today...

pamisgreat: Want to go to lunch or something?

jimh2: only if there's bread involved and i get to sing along to 'alone again, naturally' in the car.

pamisgreat: Is that actually what that song is called?

jimh2: why wouldn't it be?

pamisgreat: Seems like a cumbersome title, is all.

jimh2: perhaps you're right, pam. perhaps you're right.

jimh2: where were you thinking for lunch?

pamisgreat: You want bread... I don't know what I want as long as it involves lots of carbs... Cugino's is the only place that comes to mind.

jimh2: that sounds fine

jimh2: although you know, i had my heart broken at cugino's.

pamisgreat: Oh yeah?

jimh2: yeah, i was out with this really great girl and then she told me she was engaged.

pamisgreat: That sounds absolutely terrible.

jimh2: mostly just disconcerting, actually. i guess saying my heart was broken comes off as melodramatic. can you forgive me?

pamisgreat: Forgiven.

jimh2: by the way, what the hell is up with dwight?

pamisgreat: Did you seriously just ask me that?

jimh2: he seems to be plotting something with andy. andy whom he has shunned.

pamisgreat: He hasn't shunned Andy he just says "unshun" and "reshunned" whenever he speaks to him.

jimh2: you think it's all part of an elaborate scheme to fool us and get us fired?

pamisgreat: Why us?

jimh2: did you seriously just ask me that?

pamisgreat: I guess we did get Andydrew sent to anger management.

jimh2: i'm telling you, those two are up to something.

pamisgreat: Frankly I'd love to be fired. I'd get severance.

jimh2: is that why you don't quit?

pamisgreat: That and other reasons.

pamisgreat: Okay seriously, time to pee.

Jim actually got a little work done while she was gone, and was on the phone when she got back.

pamisgreat: On the phone?! GOD WHAT WILL I DO. I might as well kill myself from boredom now.

pamisgreat: Tell them you have an impatient receptionist who needs all of your attention immediately to stave off her impending boredom.

pamisgreat: JIM I NEED YOU, JIIIIIIIIM! *dramatic sigh*

jimh2: so demanding, beesly

jimh2: i did make a sale though. i'd say that earns me at least 45 minutes of doing nothing.

pamisgreat: Only 45?

jimh2: lunch is in 45.

pamisgreat: You just gonna sit there until then?

jimh2: i have every intention of doing just that, actually

jimh2: although...

He stood up and walked over to reception to an anxious Pam, who figured pranking was afoot.

He took her by surprise when he murmured, "Hey, I still need some toner for the copier. Can you open the supply closet for me?"

Her eyes went wide with fear, lust, anxiety, probably a million other things and finally extreme embarrassment. "Shit!" she shrieked under her breath, covering her mouth. She didn't wait for a reply before explaining, "I actually seriously don't have the key!" Jim gave her a confused and somewhat endeared look, and once again patted her desk before heading off to his own.

pamisgreat: SORRY!

pamisgreat: seriously

pamisgreat: I hadn't expected or even thought about it...

jimh2: it's okay

pamisgreat: No I am so going to make this up to you.

pamisgreat: Even if it is for my own benefit. I have about a hundred and five other office fantasies that don't involve keys I actually don't have...

pamisgreat: Oh god I think Angela's right-- I am a hussy, aren't I?!

jimh2: pam, calm down, you are not a hussy

pamisgreat: I am. I am, and I'm sorry. I don't mean to treat you like that, Jim.

jimh2: you know you really don't have to be worried about that...

pamisgreat: Okay, I have a plan.

jimh2: a plan? does this situation call for a plan?

pamisgreat: Yes it does. Okay. Since I am already about as embarrassed and oddly bold as I'll ever be, I think I'm just going to describe this fantasy to you... only fair, right? You asked...

jimh2: i really don't think that's such a good idea right now...

pamisgreat: I'll use the least sexy words I can think of. Okay?

jimh2: um...

pamisgreat: First, you come over to my desk and ask for the toner.

jimh2: innocent enough

pamisgreat: Then I say okay and get the key and we go over to the supply closet.

jimh2: naturally

pamisgreat: THEN, the door shuts. And I go for the toner. But it's too high up, so you have to help me.

jimh2: wait is this a SEXUAL fantasy, beesly? i'm appalled! here i was thinking there'd be unicorns! this is highly unprofessional.

pamisgreat: shush! Do you want to hear the rest?

jimh2: well, i still don't think it's a good idea but yes. yes i do.

pamisgreat: Alright then. So I'm reaching for it and you come over and reach over me, so you're almost pressed against me. Our breathing is getting heavy and we're all trembling and the tension is thick and everything and then you lower your face and... oh yeah, no sexy language, right? You lower your... visage? To my earlobe and begin slurping (?) at it. I gasp and then I feel your... hard man junk... oh god I seriously can't continue this. I'm sorry. I should just delete this

pamisgreat: Oh whoops the enter and delete keys are so close to each other.

pamisgreat: Well good thing I was already as embarrassed as I could possibly be...

jimh2: so i don't get the thrilling conclusion?

pamisgreat: Suffice to say we fucked.

jimh2: pamela beesly!

pamisgreat: I seriously don't know where this is all coming from. I'm sorry. Maybe it's the hangover and the four pills I took this morning to remedy it... I don't even know what I took, it said pain relief on it, though.

jimh2: that doesn't sound safe. are you feeling okay?

pamisgreat: Pam is great!

jimh2: great

pamisgreat: Although I am really turned on right now.

pamisgreat: Okay I really need to stop I don't know what has gotten into me.

jimh2: presumably lots of alcohol and pain medication

pamisgreat: The remnants of a sad, sad night alone in my apartment.

jimh2: you were drinking alone?

pamisgreat: Yeah. So I was.

jimh2: i did some of that too.

pamisgreat: You nursing your own hangover there, Halpert?

jimh2: yeah, a little bit. but i don't even know why i was drinking over her. i guess it wasn't really over her.

pamisgreat: No?

jimh2: i think it was more about myself. the whole pathetic, moping, self-pity thing.

pamisgreat: That's what I was doing!

jimh2: maybe we should meet up sometime and mope together

pamisgreat: That sounds like an excellent idea. Nothing like someone else feeling shitty to make you feel better about yourself!

jimh2: i'm pretty sure if i got you alone to mope that's the last thing i'd want to be doing

pamisgreat: James Halpert! What has gotten into you! You don't even have an overdose on pain medication to blame!

jimh2: no, but i do have the girl i'm crazy about but never got to have making obscene sexual remarks towards me

pamisgreat: Still crazy about, huh?

jimh2: i just broke up with my "awesome girlfriend", right?

pamisgreat: You know she is not that awesome.

jimh2: not as awesome as some girls i know...

pamisgreat: This is what I get for my outlandish flirtation, huh? You just left a fairly committed relationship, I don't want to be your rebound.

jimh2: i'm pretty sure i was never very committed to that relationship. no, i was, actually, but not to her. i was committed to make myself forget other things.

pamisgreat: And I guess that didn't really work out.

jimh2: rebounds never work out

pamisgreat: Actually I'm pretty sure Karen works out.

jimh2: too skinny for my tastes

pamisgreat: You calling me fat?

jimh2: you just have fuller assets

pamisgreat: Because I do work out.

pamisgreat: Actually that is a lie.

jimh2: you're pretty damn lucky if you can look like that and not work out

pamisgreat: Okay I can't take much more of this flirtation.

jimh2: sorry

pamisgreat: Although you know I also have this one fantasy where we are chatting online...

jimh2: me too

pamisgreat: Except in my fantasy I'm not making nervous and erratic sexual comments and I think it ends in sex in the bathroom.

jimh2: mine's ironically the supply closet

pamisgreat: I really need to get that key.

 

jimh2: woah

pamisgreat: I know.

jimh2: so you were serious about all that fantasy stuff, huh?

pamisgreat: Did you think I was joking?

jimh2: i don't know, it was a little surprising to hear, even in IM, so i kind of thought you were just messing with me or teasing or something...

pamisgreat: Do you really think me that cruel? I'm hurt!

jimh2: no, of course not. but honestly i couldn't allow myself to believe you were serious. i would have probably had to run over to reception and have you right there or die of blue balls.

pamisgreat: Halpert!

jimh2: sorry, it's true! you can't blame me! i've only been wanting that for, i don't know, years.

pamisgreat: Me too, I think. In any case I hope I proved you wrong ;-*

jimh2: i honestly do not know how you expect me to get through the rest of the workday, pam beesly.

pamisgreat: I will abstain from further flirtation.

jimh2: appreciated.

pamisgreat: So are we supposed to have a talk about where we stand and all of our feelings and stuff now?

jimh2: i think so. or maybe i could just ask you out to dinner?

pamisgreat: I think you're supposed to do that before... you know... that stuff we did.

jimh2: oh yeah. i guess we're not very good at this.

pamisgreat: I don't know, I don't think we're doing too badly...

jimh2: i thought you were going to cut out the flirtation?

pamisgreat: Oops, sorry!

jimh2: i'm just going to ignore you and stare at dwight for awhile.

pamisgreat: Sorry! Jim! I promise I will keep my language professional!

jimh2: this is your last chance, beesly

pamisgreat: I'll be good. So, dinner? You gonna take me someplace fancy?

jimh2: i don't know. whatever you want. although i confess chinese take-out to be my date meal of choice.

pamisgreat: That actually sounds pretty fantastic to me.

jimh2: we can even get orange chicken

pamisgreat: And spring rolls?

jimh2: of course

pamisgreat: This is sounding like a very good idea to me.

jimh2: god, i am starving.

pamisgreat: Me too. I do not regret how my lunch break was spent, but my stomach is telling me otherwise.

jimh2: this is going to be a very, very long day.

pamisgreat: I'll stop distracting you and you can work for a bit, but meet me in the break room in about a half an hour and I'll see what I can do to temporarily solve both your problems.

jimh2: both my problems?

pamisgreat: Oh yes ;-) Now back to work, Halpert!

jimisawesome: explain to me again why i'm at home at not at your place?

pbees3: Wait a minute, now you're using your self-promoting screenname while I'm back to boring old pbees3?

pbees3: Also, you're supposed to be "thinking about this relationship" so we don't rush into anything.

jimisawesome: i've been "thinking about this relationship" for the past... 4, 5, 6 years?

pbees3: Things have changed, though. You just broke up with Karen and I want this to work, you know?

jimisawesome: i understand. but...

pbees3: Yeah. I'll be over in 15.

She's there in 10.

•••

jimisawesome: remind me to never attempt to reheat spring rolls in the microwave ever again.

pbees3: Why? Because they get kind of soggy?

jimisawesome: no. well, they do. but i always reheat them when i'm not actually hungry and they never even taste good and i always regret it. i can never wait until the next day and heat them up right in the oven.

pbees3: Oh I see. Jim, never attempt to reheat leftover spring rolls in the microwave. At least wait until the next day.

jimisawesome: sound advice.

pbees3: I'm very wise.

jimisawesome: indeed you are.

pbees3: Do we really have to do this? Can't I just go into the living room and jump you? I really want to go into the living room and jump you. Even if you have had one too many spring rolls are all bloaty.

jimisawesome: that sounds tempting, but i think i need to give myself a break, anyway.

pbees3: Really? You seem to have the stamina ;-)

jimisawesome: maybe so, but not the restraint. how many times have we attempted to talk about this whole relationship thing and it's just led to... less productive, but much more entertaining activities?

jimisawesome: p.s. your flirtatious flattery will get your nowhere

pbees3: It's already gotten me quite a few places today, actually. You have no willpower.

jimisawesome: i have more willpower than you know, and that is precisely why i am exerting right now.

pbees3: Hmph! Have you no respect for my womanly NEEDS, Jim?

jimisawesome: i have great respect for your needs. i just think we should cool it for a bit. do you need me to run through how today has gone again for you?

pbees3: Yes. Yes I do. I can't seem to wrap my mind around it.

jimisawesome: me neither. maybe together we can piece things together. i believe it started with some rather flirtatious remarks via IM.

pbees3: I still blame the pain medication.

jimisawesome: none of that, i'm pretty sure that would have worn off by now.

pbees3: By NOW yes, but after so many hot fits of passion I think I'm permitted to be as flirtatious with you as I choose.

jimisawesome: hot fits of passion? we're getting off-topic. focus, pam.

pbees3: Focusing! After that we took our lunch break...

jimisawesome: lunch break, yes.

pbees3: And then about an hour later we were fucking in the break room!

jimisawesome: yeah, you did a good job enlisting phyllis to help out with that.

pbees3: That's why I suggested it in the first place! A few weeks ago she was trying to convince me to make a move and I said if I did she had to promise to watch over the break room one day so we could fuck there.

jimisawesome: jesus.

pbees3: I think she thought I was joking, but I think she REALLY wanted us to get together, so... I think she enjoyed the thrill. I certainly enjoyed the thrill!

jimisawesome: It was... thrilling... Anyway, after that...

pbees3: Hours of anguish...

jimisawesome: but we managed to clock out by 4.

pbees3: Yes, and then there was my apartment. A few times there, actually.

jimisawesome: and then you made me leave.

pbees3: Yes, that was certainly effective.

jimisawesome: then you came over here and there was my bedroom and then chinese food and now here we are.

pbees3: Only 6 times, then? ;-)

jimisawesome: the night is young...

jimisawesome: so what's all this about a stairwell fantasy?

pbees3: Oh yes. That one is one of my favorites.

jimisawesome: and what exactly happens?

pbees3: I thought we were supposed to be taking a break. I know for a fact that if I start describing it, we will not be breaking for very long.

jimisawesome: fine. okay. you're right, this was a stupid idea, anyway.

pbees3: I told you!

jimisawesome: although i like the idea of you on my bed in my robe typing away happily.

pbees3: It's quite a domestic image, isn't it. Tell me again why you have two computers for one person?

jimisawesome: josh said i needed a laptop for work, as if i would actually be so desperate to get things done that i'd work on the go, but i figured i'd take it if the corporate credit card was paying.

jimisawesome: i used it for 10 minutes once in a coffee shop, finishing up a spreadsheet. so i wouldn't feel guilty.

pbees3: Good idea. $1000 for 10 minutes of work seems perfectly fair.

jimisawesome: well, i admit it was a challenge...

jimisawesome: anyway let's decide what to do the rest of the night.

pbees3: Can't you just come talk to me?

jimisawesome: you're on my bed wearing my robe. and i know you are naked under that robe. so i think we ought to decide what we're doing first.

pbees3: What about all this amazing willpower?

jimisawesome: totally different situation. i have resisted you in public situations with your clothes on for years, but this is slightly different...

pbees3: Ok, ok. I think we should trying snuggling and watching a movie. See if we can make it all the way through. I'll wear pajamas.

jimisawesome: did you bring pajamas?

pbees3: I'll have to wear your pajamas.

jimisawesome: see, now that's counterproductive.

pbees3: I'm still set on this movie idea.

pbees3: You have any cheesy romantic comedies? Guilty pleasure girly flick?

jimisawesome: even if i do like a few of them, i'd have to hand in my man card if i wanted to purchase one.

jimisawesome: well i do have bridget jones's diary, but karen gave that to me as a joke. and i have a very long engagement. but that's a war movie and it has violence and manly things.

pbees3: oh, I wanted to see that! It's by the guy who did Amelie, right?

jimisawesome: yeah. but it's long and romantic... so... don't know how that will work.

pbees3: Willpower, Halpert!

pbees3: I'll blow you first and then we can cuddle. Okay?

She heard a choked sort of sound from the living room and smiled to herself. Being silly with Jim was always something she treasured, and she loved adding a new flirty side to things. Okay, maybe more than just flirty. But it was nothing like she'd ever been before. Though she'd probably muttered the phrase "I'll blow you first" somewhere along the line, it would have been with a sort of resignation, not something she giddily looked forward to. She wondered how long this phase would last, but tried not to think about that too much and just savor what she had while it was fresh and amazing.

"I don't see the DVD in here, can you look on the shelf above my stereo?" Jim yelled from the other room.

She quickly scurried off to find it, then skipped into the living room to Jim.