Pam was in Jim’s apartment; they were sitting on the couch and watching a movie.  Pam had brought a comedy, but it hadn’t seemed to help.  Jim was quiet, clearly apprehensive.

“It’ll be okay,” Pam said, trying to soothe his nerves.

Jim’s hand passed over his face as he put on a small smile.  “I know.  It’s just the last few months have been really good and now they’re coming back…”

“We’ve been through this before,” Pam said softly.

“Yeah, I’m just being…but I just don’t want a camera stuck in my face every time I look at you.  They’ve already seen so much.”

Pam had to grin, in spite of her boyfriend’s discomfort.  “Well then, I guess it’s a good thing you didn’t give them any hint we might be dating before they left in May.”

Jim groaned.  “Don’t remind me.  I really wish I could have controlled myself until you’d finished your interview.  I was so stupid…”

“No you weren’t,” Pam said, brooking no argument as she took his right hand in hers.  “And I wouldn’t have had it any other way.”

Jim’s eyes partially closed as he relived that moment for the hundredth time.  It had been great for both of them.  And they had worked all summer to put the past behind them.  And now the camera crew would be back; asking questions, catching every glimpse and small moment, peeling back the private shell they’d developed over the past few, blissful months.  It had been his idea not to tell anyone in the office that they were dating.  At first, it was just to protect Karen’s feelings.  But after Karen left, it just seemed easier to just keep things under wraps.

“What do you want to do?” Pam asked.

“I don’t want to talk to them about it,” Jim confessed.  “I’m happy we’re together, you know that, right?”  He looked over at Pam, wanting to be sure that she understood.

“I know,” Pam answered; and she did.  She could tell by the smile he wore at work how happy he was when they were together.  And things were going really well.  But she also knew that while Jim was trying, he still hadn’t come all the way back, not yet.  The way he didn’t want anyone to know they were dating, the way he was still somewhat shy with her even months into their relationship.  He was still afraid. 

Last year she had experienced so much change and pain.  She felt that she had pushed through a barrier that night at the beach.  She had never felt stronger or more confident in her life, and that confidence had extended into their relationship. 

It hadn’t been until they were dating that Pam realized how much the past year had damaged Jim.  Initially, he couldn’t even talk to her about what happened after Casino night.  There was this huge gap between that day and when he had broken up with Karen.  But with time and a lot of patience on her part, they had finally started talking.  And each day, he seemed a little more like the man who had been her best friend, the man she’d fallen in love with without even realizing it.  And every piece of his heart that he recovered, he gave to her unconditionally.  She had never felt more loved.  She had faith that in time he would come all the way back and she was willing to give him that time.

Jim stared off into space and whispered, “I just don’t want to share our relationship with those guys.”

“Then we won’t,” Pam said.  “We’ll say that we’re back to being really good friends and leave it at that.”  They turned back to the television and focused on the movie they were watching, Borat.  Pam got a little annoyed with the Pam Anderson subplot.  She’d never been a big Baywatch fan.

Jim whispered to Pam, “Did you ever consider that if you’d married Roy, you’d be Pam Anderson now?”

“Oh my God!”  Pam’s eyes went wide, making Jim laugh.  “How did Michael never notice that?”

Jim’s expression changed.  He looked a little too smug for Pam’s liking.

“What?” Pam asked.

Jim’s grin grew wider.  “Michael joked about it once, right after the Dundies three years ago.  Toby and I drafted a letter from corporate, telling Michael that any mention of Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee, or about Pam Anderson sex tapes at the office or in front of you would be grounds for immediate termination.  We faked the CEO’s signature.”

Pam contemplated this while watching the movie.  When the film reached the point where Borat saw the Pam Anderson/Tommy Lee sex tape, Pam turned to her boyfriend and asked, “So, did you ever see the tapes?”

Jim looked over at Pam and replied, “What kind of guy do you think I am?”

Pam didn’t buy Jim’s sense of outrage.  “I’ll take that as a yes, then.”

“Actually, I never did,” Jim admitted.  “Even though I knew it wasn’t you, the name hit a little too close to home.”

“You know, that’s kind of sweet,” Pam said.

“And possibly pathetic,” Jim continued, laughing as he turned back to the film.

As Pam looked at Jim, she could tell that he was another step closer to being "her Jim" again.  For the first time since they’d been together, he’d mentioned Roy and it wasn’t a big deal.  She smiled and leaned against his shoulder.

The next morning, before the cameramen arrived, Pam looked through the spam file on her computer.  She remembered seeing something…  There it was... An offer for a Pam Anderson celebrity sex tape.  She would give it to Jim for his birthday.  Just a couple of clicks and nobody would be any the…

Why was her screen suddenly blue?

Pam thought, “This is going to really suck.”

She tried to reboot, and just got the blue screen.

Maybe, if she was really lucky, the IT guy could fix it before Jim or Michael found out.

Dwight was doing an interview in the conference room shortly after the IT guy managed to fix Pam’s computer.  Jim took the opportunity to visit reception.

“So, Beesley, care to explain your attempted purchase this morning?”  Jim said with an eyebrow raised.

“No,” Pam said, trying to hide her blush and moving her jellybean dish off the desk to refill it.

“Come on,” Jim pleaded.  “I need details.  Can you at least give me initials?”  Pam shook her head.  “Hair color?”  another shake.  “Girth?”  with that, Pam let out a loud snort.  Did he actually think she was buying the tape for herself?  No, the teasing look in his eyes gave him away.  Thank goodness.

“If you must know,” Pam said softly, “I’ve always had a thing for Screech on Saved by the Bell.”

Jim whispered back, “Always good to know what I’m up against.” 

The camera crew interviewed both Jim and Pam later that morning.  Jim tossed Pam a small smile when he left the conference room. 

A few moments after Pam finished her interview, Michael arrived at the office and announced that he had hit Meredith with his car.  After Michael and the camera guys went into his office, Jim returned to reception, a serious look on his face.  “Hey, do you remember our plan about what you should do if we were walking together and you saw Michael’s car?”

Pam nodded, “That I should push you into the bushes and pretend you were a mugger.”

“Well, after the Meredith thing, maybe it would be best if you ran and hid in the bushes and left me to fend for myself.”

“So you think that the Sebring may have developed a taste for blood?”

“I don’t want to risk it.  I mean Michael was complaining about a speed bump on the highway last week…”

“I see your point,” Pam agreed.  The camera crew was just leaving Michael’s office.  Pam sighed, “I have to go tell Michael what happened with my computer this morning.  Wish me luck.”

Jim nodded.  “I’m sure Screech will be worth it.”  Pam made sure that no one was watching and slowly extended her middle finger towards her secret boyfriend.

---

After the staff met to discuss the hospital visit to Meredith, the documentary director asked if everyone could meet for a brief discussion in the conference room.  Jim and Pam sat beside each other.

“Okay,” the tall, quiet man said, “I wanted to talk to you guys for a minute, just to make sure that we remember the ground rules.”

“Not again,” Stanley groaned.  “I’m still amazed that Michael was able to talk Corporate into letting you guys film us for five years.  I don’t need to go over anything.”

“Still,” the director cut in, “We have a new soundman, and I want to make sure we’re all on the same page.  We aren’t trying to intrude in your lives.”

Angela exhaled loudly, letting it be clear of her opinion on that statement.

“Okay, so we are intruding, I admit that,” the director said with a rueful smile.  “Still, as per your contracts, all we ask from you is your honesty.  If you don’t want to answer a question or have us involved in something, just say so.”  He looked at Jim and Pam as he spoke.  They were careful not to look at each other.

“Alright,” Jim said, slowly standing up.  “I admit it.  I’m from outer space.”

“I knew it,” Dwight shouted as he got up and took a step towards the door (he wanted to get to his throwing stars, just in case…).

“Sit down, you idiot,” Michael snapped.  “He’s obviously kidding.”

“Oh,” Dwight said, dejected.

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” Andy replied.  “He fooled me a couple of times and I went to Cornell.”

“Really?” Pam asked.  “I never knew that.  You should have totally let us know.  That’s something to be proud of.”

“Why thank you,” Andy said.

Pam looked at Jim and they shared a grin.

----

Just before leaving for work, Jim strolled by Pam’s desk and picked up one last jellybean, “for the road.”  As he did so, he left a Post It note on her desk.  Pam looked around and, seeing the cameramen occupied, grabbed the paper.  It read.  “Garage 5:15.”

As Pam left the office, she giggled as she saw Kevin trying to hide in his car.  He was even worse at being a private eye than he was as an accountant.  Agent Michael Scarn clearly had no competition in the Scranton office.  She was so busy laughing at Kevin that she didn’t notice the film crew following her.

Kevin smiled as he watched the cameraman’s truck drive away.  It was fun being a diversion.  He couldn’t wait to tell Stacy about his day.  And if he won his bet with Oscar, he might even be able to afford a night out with his fiancée.

Pam pulled over and unlocked the passenger door.  Jim hopped in and eagerly kissed her before they drove away. 

“So, why do you think he went over the documentary rules again today?” Pam asked.

“Because they had a new guy,” Jim offered, but he knew it was a poor excuse.

“And he was staring at us because…”

The smile that Jim had worn since kissing her faded.  “Yeah, that had me a little worried, too.  What did you say during your interview?”

“That we had gone out a few times.  I’d helped you get through the breakup and we were back to being good friends.  Just like we agreed.  What did you say?”

“Well, I said I’d broken up with Karen and how she left.”  After a brief pause, he continued.  “And I said that I was single and looking, so if they knew anyone, they should let me know.”

Jim was worried that Pam would be upset.  He didn’t want to imply that he wasn’t happy with her.  He wasn’t prepared for Pam to start laughing hysterically and pounding the steering wheel.  Fortunately, they had stopped for a traffic light. 

“What?” Jim asked.

The question only made Pam laugh harder.  Finally the light changed and the driver behind them beeped his horn.  Pam stilled her laughter and started driving towards her apartment.

“Why is that so funny?” Jim asked, clearly not understanding the joke.

Pam had calmed down by the time they reached her apartment.  She got out of the car and took Jim’s hand as they walked upstairs.  “Jim, who were you dating two years ago?”

“Katy.  You know that.”

“And last year?”

“Karen.”  Jim still had no idea where this was going.

Pam smiled warmly at her boyfriend.  “And who did you reduce to a happy, speechless puddle when you asked her out last May?”

“You?” he asked, not knowing that had been her reaction after he shut the door.

“Would you describe these girls as attractive?”

“Well, yeah.”  He opened her door for her and followed her inside.

“And you really think the camera guys are going to believe that you can’t get a date?”

The realization finally hit Jim.  “So I overdid it?”

Pam nodded and pointed her finger to her nose.  Jim knew that the look meant that he had blown it big time.  It was also clear that she didn’t care about it nearly as much as he did.

Jim collapsed on the couch.  “I thought it was a normal thing to say.  I mean it’s not like …”

“Jim, one day you’re going to have to admit to yourself that you’re hot,” Pam laughed as she sat down beside him.  “Or do I have to lock you in a room with Phyllis and Meredith?  She saw Jim’s slightly panicked expression.  “So you’ve noticed?”

“Yeah.  Once or twice.”  Jim tried to change the subject, “I’m just glad Meredith is going to be alright.  So what are the odds that she gets the full Oscar treatment?”

“Vacation, company car, and raise?”  Pam asked.  Jim nodded.  “I don’t think so.  After all, Michael only hit her with his car, he didn’t kiss her.”

“So that’s the standard?” Jim asked.

Pam said, “If Michael hits you with a car, you get one extra week of vacation.  If he burns down your house, you get the vacation and a raise.  If he outs you in public and kisses you, that’s a raise, a vacation, and a car.”

“Wow, if that’s the case, what happens if you see him naked?”

“You get free therapy for the rest of your life.”  Pam said.  “Some things, you just never recover from.”

----

The next morning, Pam and Jim were talking about the craziness that had evolved from Michael’s new obsession, turning Meredith’s accident into a rabies fun run. 

“Can we get out of this?” Jim asked.  “Ryan is going to flip out when he hears that we’ve shut down the office for rabies.”

“Yeah, but Michael’s been a little down,” Pam countered.  “Besides, it’s a nice day out.  We have to take advantage while we can.”

“Well, there is that,” Jim said, willing to be persuaded.  Pam had just started to detail her strategy for winning the race when the camera crew showed up and asked them both to go into the conference room.”

As soon as they saw the television and video display, they knew that they were in trouble.  They saw the tape of them kissing in Pam’s car.  Pam kind of enjoyed watching Jim try to explain the footage.  After all, the whole secret thing was his idea.  She let him talk to see if there was any way he could get out of this.  Finally, she took pity on her boyfriend and said, “I gave him a ride home because...we're dating.”

She saw Jim’s expression go from shock to happy acceptance.  Pam could tell that Jim was relieved.  When he agreed that things were going really well, neither of them could stop smiling and blushing. 

The camera crew agreed to keep things under wraps for the time being.  The happy couple didn’t know that the director had a bet with the new sound guy that the whole office would know inside two weeks. 

The director shrugged his shoulders toward Kevin as he left the conference room.  The accountant sighed; this meant he had to cook for Stacy this Friday instead of going to the Outback Steakhouse.

After they could get away from the cameras, Pam turned to Jim and said, “Are you okay?”  She was relieved to see the easy smile on Jim’s face.

“Yeah,” he said, his voice a little deeper than normal.  “I mean at first I was like, if only I hadn’t kissed you as soon as I got in the car.”  He chuckled to himself before continuing, “But then I realized what it would have meant if I didn’t want to kiss you as soon as I got in the car, and I’m much happier this way.”

“Sometimes I like the way you think, Halpert.”

---

Later that afternoon, Pam was taking something to Michael.  Jim was on a sales call, trying to keep the day from being a total waste, when he heard his girlfriend scream.  He hung up the phone and followed Pam into the break room, closing the door behind them.

“What happened?”

“I just got therapy for life,” Pam said as she paced.

“What?”

“I went into Michael’s office and he was naked from the waist down.”

“Oh my God!” Jim said.  “Is there anything I can do?”

“We should have never said it out loud...” Pam said, her voice breaking.  “It’s like in a horror movie.  If you mention the terrible, hideous thing, it happens.”  She continued pacing as Jim tried to calm her down.

Their conversation was interrupted as Michael knocked loudly on the door of the break room.  When Michael compared his naked form to an artist model’s, Jim had to bite his cheeks to keep from laughing.

Once their boss left, Jim turned to Pam and asked, “So does this mean I’m no longer your exclusive male model?”

“Shut it, Halpert,’ Pam warned with an arched eyebrow.  “Remember I have complete control over just how…heroic…you look when I sketch you nude.”

“You wouldn’t,” Jim said with mock outrage.

“I’m just saying, women know that big feet don’t necessarily mean…”

“Okay, I won’t mention it again.”

---

Jim changed and walked down to the parking lot for the race.  Pam was right; it was a very nice, sunny day.  He stretched, prepared to run if that’s what Pam wanted to do.

After an oh-so-pleasant exchange where Jan accused Pam of peeking at Michael, the receptionist found Jim as he was talking to a girl in a nurse’s uniform. 

“Hey Pam,” Jim said with a smile.  “This is Elizabeth.”  The two ladies shook hands.

“You look familiar,” Pam started to say.

“Elizabeth was here earlier this year when Michael ordered a dancer,” Jim explained.

“Oh, right,” Pam said, her eyes widening slightly as she recognized her. 

“When Michael said he needed some one with a medical background, or at least a uniform, to take the check, I remembered her,” Jim continued.

“Well, you certainly look the part,” Pam said, hoping she sounded polite.  She refused to play the jealous girlfriend, not after her encounter with Jan.  “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Oh my gosh, you’re THE  Pam,” Elizabeth said.  “You know Gordon, the guy who did Ben Franklin that day, couldn’t stop talking about you.”

It was Jim’s turn to smile back at Pam.

“How do you two know each other?”

“Well, there aren’t too many people that do the costume thing,” Elizabeth explained. “We do colonial days things together all the time.  Nice guy, but he can be a little grabby.”

“Good to know,” Pam replied.

---

As the race started, Pam stayed at the starting line. 

Jim looked over at her, curious. 

Instead of running, Pam walked over to him and began to slowly walk the course.  She noted, “Oh we’re in last place.”

Jim agreed, “Ow, would you look at that,”

“Darn it,” Pam said and they strolled along.  Pam felt Jim take her hand.  She looked down, surprised.  Jim had to know that the camera crew behind them was recording their every move.  She cut her eyes over to him and saw his happy smile.  He had taken another step towards her.  She moved towards him slightly as they continued on their lives together.

Pam woke up alone in her apartment Thursday morning.  She had class Wednesday night, so Jim had agreed that was the night they slept in their own apartments.  She missed waking up with Jim; he was a cuddler, not like…  No, she promised that she wouldn’t compare Jim and Roy anymore.

The past week had been wonderful.  Ever since the camera crew had found out about Jim and Pam’s relationship, things seemed to have advanced to another level for the couple.  The closeness that started as they held hands during the fun run and estate sale had merely made them hungrier for each other once they got back to Pam’s apartment that evening.  After Friday’s work, they had spent all weekend together and never left Jim’s apartment. 

Pam loved how Jim touched her, sometimes so softly and reverently, other times with a passion so evident that it frightened her.  If cameras affected him this way, maybe she needed to put one in the bedroom.  She quietly fixated on that thought for several minutes.

She gathered the materials she needed for her assignment this week and packed them into her attaché case.  Jim was so supportive of her art.  He had never complained about the classes, was perfectly willing to play chef when she was too busy to cook and even modeled for her once.  He was so different than…  This was getting impossible, she thought to herself.  She groaned as she scrambled to get dressed, the morning had gotten away from her.

Jim woke up in his apartment, reaching out for Pam and only feeling a cold pillow. “Oh yeah, class.”  He was showered and shaved quickly, not bothering to have breakfast.  He knew he could grab something at the office.

Pam went into the break room for some much needed caffeine.  She was bought a couple of sodas, one for her and one for…”Hey,” she said as Jim walked in.  “I got you one,” she said, handing a grape soda to Jim.

“Oh wow, thank you,” Jim said with a smile. Pam couldn’t help but notice how appreciative he was, even of small things.  “I was just going to grab some chips.  You want some?”

“No, thanks,” She looked longingly at the Sun Chips.  “We’re still on for lunch, right?”

“I guess,” Jim deadpanned happily. 

Pam snuck a look around.  “Oh what the hell,” she thought.  She walked back to Jim and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

Jim pretended shock.  “How dare you,” he said.

Pam gave him a “fancy new Beesley” look and left the break room, unaware the Toby had seen the kiss.

After Toby “outed” their relationship, Pam and Jim had tried to file the love forms with the HR rep, but he had seemed strangely insistent not to.  Jim and Pam retreated to the break room for lunch, thankful that nobody else was around.

“So, how do you feel?” Pam asked.

“Well, I guess it was inevitable,” Jim replied.  “I should have known better than to think anyone could ever keep secrets around here.”

“Oh, there are plenty of secrets around here,” Pam said.  “More than you know.”

“Oh really,” Jim said, clearly not convinced.  “So tell me one of the amazing secrets that you know about but I don’t.”

Pam paused.  Several juicy ones leapt to mind, but she really wanted a shocker.  “Okay,” she finally said.  “Did you know that Kevin and Meredith had an affair three years ago?”

“No way,” Jim gasped.

Pam smugly nodded.  “It lasted for two months, and Oscar caught them in the parking lot.”

“Wow,” Jim managed.

“See, there’s a lot going on around here that you have no idea about,” Pam said, a little smugly.

Jim knew he couldn’t let her get away with that.  “Well, I have one.  I swore that I wasn’t going to tell anybody this.  But in the interest of revealing secrets.  Oh my God, this is going to make your brain explode.  Dwight and Angela…dating.”  Jim was rewarded with the shocked look on Pam’s face.  “Have been, for six months.”

“No,” Pam said.

“Swear to God.  This is great.  Actually, I was going to tell you for your birthday, but this is much more fun.”  Jim was really enjoying this.

“No,” Pam interrupted.  “They have been dating for like, two years,” Pam said.  “Since before your barbecue.”

Once again, it was Jim’s mind that had been blown.  When Pam challenged Jim on why she had never told him about Dwangela, part of her wanted Jim to fight back a little.  It was one of the things that worried her about her new boyfriend.  He seldom fought back, even when he didn’t agree with her.

She was a little disappointed when he gave in, but that feeling was superseded when he said conversationally, “we should have started dating a long time ago.”  He was so happy to be with her, how could she not…  Then Phyllis came in, and the reality of dating in the office was brought home.  They had finished the rest of their lunch in silence. 

That night, Jim had suggested Chinese for dinner.  Pam said she preferred Mexican.  Again, Jim had readily acquiesced.  It was beginning to annoy her a little.

The next day, they had tried joking with the camera guys about how their relationship had gone stale since people knew, but they were forcing things and both of them knew it.

Ironically enough, it was Ryan who helped pull them out of their funk.  When he asked if Pam could develop some concepts for the Dunder Mifflin Infinity website, she snuck a quick look over at Jim and found her boyfriend smiling at her.  When Ryan left, they exchanged air high fives, the highest honor one of them could bestow on the other.  With this one, she now led the competition with Jim, three “Air fives” to two.

She had lunch with Jim and showed her the sketches she’d made. 

“I like that one,” Jim said, pointing to a drawing that was based on the concept of infinity.

“I think it’s my favorite, too,” Pam agreed with a smile.

“It would look nice in blue,” Jim offered, pointing to her blue blouse.

“You think?”  Pam hadn’t pictured particular colors yet.

“With orange polka dots and pink stripes” Jim continued.

Pam laughed.  “Okay, that’s it, you don’t get to pick to colors next time we paint.”

“But it would make an impression,” Jim mock argued.

“It would say that we’re color blind,” Pam countered, happy for even a fake squabble.

“That’s a good thing to be in the office,” Jim concluded.  Pam just shook her head.  “Seriously,” Jim said as he cleaned the table, “Ryan is going to love these.”

That positive feeling had carried Pam through the rest of the day, right up to the point where Ryan asked her out.  When he said, “Wear something nice,” a chill ran down her spine.  Was this whole thing just his smarmy attempt to get in her pants?

“No,” she managed.  “Uhm; I’m sorry; I’m dating Jim.”

“You’re kidding,” Ryan said.

The both turned to Jim.  Pam remembered how Roy had reacted when he saw her and Jim laughing together.  If he’d heard someone ask her out, there would have been damage.

Jim, who had obviously been listening, never even bothered to look away from his computer screen.  He just gave them a wave.

For a split second, Pam was annoyed.  Then she realized what this meant.  Jim trusted her.  He didn’t feel a need to make a scene or stake a claim.  He trusted her and their relationship. 

Pam listened to Jim as he did his talking head later.  “I guess he can’t get ANY girl he wants,” Jim said.  Pam could hear the happiness and pride in his voice.

That night as they drove to Jim’s place, Pam asked.  “Do you ever regret it?”

“What?” Jim asked.

“Withdrawing from consideration for the corporate job.  You could have the fancy new suits and everything.”

Jim waited until they stopped at a traffic light.  Then he turned to her and said softly.  I’ve made some mistakes in my life; done some things I’m not so proud of.  But if there was ever one point in my life where I was absolutely certain I was making the right choice, it was when I asked you to dinner that night and you said ‘yes.’  If that’s the only good choice I make the rest of my life, it was worth it.”

Pam couldn’t say anything.

“So, Chinese okay tonight?”  Jim asked.

“S-sure,” Pam whispered.

“Good.”

Jim had to admit to himself that having the camera crew and his office mates find out about his relationship with Pam wasn’t the worst thing in the world.  Sure, there were Michael’s almost daily inappropriate comments, but Michael was really just white noise to him at this point. 

Since everyone knew, he didn’t have to make excuses for his behavior around Pam.  Part of him still couldn’t believe they were together.  Any day now, he expected the universe to say “just kidding,” and laugh as Pam left his life forever.  “But what the hell,” he thought.  “As long as we’re together I’ll cherish every sappy moment.”  That was what had driven him out of his bed so early on this Thursday morning.

Pam had art class last night, so she slept at her apartment.  That had enabled him to pick up the flowers, make a new mix CD, and write the five drafts he needed to get the card just right in complete privacy.  And he knew it was going to be a total surprise to his girlfriend.  It was his first opportunity to celebrate an anniversary with her, and he wasn’t about to let it pass.

He smiled to himself as he arranged the flowers in front of the door to Pam’s apartment.  It was six in the morning, and he knew Pam’s alarm was minutes away from going off.  He stifled a laugh as he knocked on the door and yelled in a fake, high-pitched voice, “Delivery for Pam Beast-, no Pam Beesley.”  He knocked again and put his ear to her door.  Satisfied by the grumbling, “Just a minute,” he heard on the other side, he ran down the stairs and hopped into his still-running car.

He had gotten less than a block when his cell phone started to ring.  He opened the phone and didn’t even have time to say “hello,” before Pam shouted, “You suck!  Thank you!”

“Kind of a mixed message there, Beesley,” Jim noted.

“Shut up,” Pam grumbled.  “I still had five minutes to sleep.  Okay, so I love the roses and daisies, but….”

Jim was grinning as he heard her uncertainty.  He couldn’t resist teasing, “But what?”

“What anniversary is this?  I mean, we’ve been dating five and a half months.”

“Beesley, it’s October fourth.”

“I know,” Pam replied.  “Why is it…Oh my God!  That’s when you started at Dunder Mifflin!”

“That’s right,” Jim verified.  “It’s the day we met.  Happy Anniversary, Pam.”

“Happy Anniversary, Jim.  I’m sorry I didn’t remember.”

“That’s okay.  We have plenty of others ahead of us.  I’m just pulling into the parking lot at work.  I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Love you,” Pam said.

“You better,” Jim said.  “I sprung for a vase, tunes and everything.”

“It was the CD that did it,” Pam deadpanned.  Switching to her most girly voice, “I can’t wait to hear it.”

“It’s all boy bands and Michael Bolton,” Jim promised.  “I wish we didn’t have that stupid launch party tonight.  But I fully intend to make up for it Friday after work.”

“McDonalds?” Pam guessed.

“You bet.  I won’t even make you order the Happy Meal. I’ll even spring for the Big Mac, fries, drink, and a shake.”

“You’re too good to me.”

“Love you Beesley,” Jim said.

“I know.  And I’m really lucky.  See you soon.”

As he hung up the phone, Jim thought back to his first week at Dunder Mifflin.  It seemed so long ago.  He walked up to the stairs to the empty office.  Not even Dwight ever showed up this early.

Dwight.  Jim still remembered how the uptight salesman had treated him that first week.

---------

“Rookie,” Dwight had said.  “I told Michael we didn’t need you, but for some reason it’s my job to make sure that you don’t disgrace the company.  First off, you need a haircut.”

“What does that have to do with selling paper?” Jim asked as he stared at the older salesman.  He noted silently that Dwight’s awful man-perm had to be just as long as his.

Dwight saw the stare.  “We deal with professionals.  They have expectations, Rookie.  My hair may be long, but the style screams, ‘professional.’”

“The name is Jim,” Jim said politely.

“Well, if you show you’re worthy of being a salesman at Dunder Mifflin, I might even bother to learn it.”  Dwight shoved an apple into his mouth and took a huge bite.

“Well, as much as I look forward to that,” Jim replied, “I have work to do.”

“Well, you’ll never outwork me,” Dwight boasted.  “I have a perfect immune system, I don’t take vacations, and I never celebrate holidays.”

“Wow.  You must have a ton of vacation time saved up.”

“I’ll never take it.  My clients depend on me to always be there.  And I will be.  Until I’m made regional manager.”

“Sounds like you have it all planned out.”

Dwight smiled, letting bits of apple fall out of his mouth.  “That’s how Michael did it, and that’s how I’ll do it.”

Against his better judgment, Jim asked, “So what’s the deal with Michael?”

“There is no deal,” Dwight replied, puzzled by the question.  “Michael was the best salesman here, then he became the manager.  He is my role model.”

Jim couldn’t help but notice how different Dwight was from his new boss.  “Well, alright then.  I guess that answers that question.  I’ll just be getting to work.”

And that was how he spent his first day at Dunder Mifflin, with his head down, talking to potential clients.  Stanley had mumbled hello, Phyllis had given him a slightly creepy stare, and Michael had periodically came out and mangled bits of old comedy routines.   He looked over at the reception desk a few times, careful not to be caught staring at the cute girl with honey blonde hair.

Selling paper wasn't too hard.  Jim had always gotten along with people, so cold calls weren’t that intimidating to him.  Shortly before five, Michael came over to his desk and asked him how he had managed his “first day in the inferno.”

Jim wasn’t sure about his total, so he took a minute and added the figures.  “Looks like I sold 500 reams today with monthly contracts for two hundred.” 

He looked up to see Dwight’s pale, shaken face and heard his new boss say, “Better look out Dwight.  That’s more than you sold your first day.”

“Beginner’s luck,” Dwight snarled.

---------

Pam arrived at the office, and taking advantage of the fact that neither the office staff nor the camera crew was present yet, sat on Jim’s lap and gave him a kiss.

“What were you doing?” Pam asked.  “You looked like you were deep in thought.”

“I was just thinking about my first day here,” Jim admitted.

“Well, that’s what anniversary’s are for,” Pam agreed.  “Do you remember the end of your first month?”

“Yeah.  Dwight called all of my new clients one week before they were due for their next order and offered them a discount for signing a two-year deal with him.  All of my commissions for the month walked out the door.”  Truth be told, he was still bitter about that.  His first student loan payments were due and he really needed the money.

“Well, some good came of it,” Pam said with a smile.

“I put Dwight’s phone in Jello.”

“Your fist prank,” Pam said, looking nostalgic.  “It was a thing of beauty.

“Yeah, that’s one of the reasons I came in early today.  I was thinking about coating the wheels of his desk chair with silicon so when he pushes back from his desk he’ll go flying….”

“Jim,” Pam pleaded.  “Dwight and Angela are fighting.  You know he’s been depressed.  It wouldn’t be right.”

“But Pam, it’s Dwight.  I mean, how can I not…”

“Please, he’s tried to be really nice to me lately.  Pranking him now would just be mean.”

“Fine,” Jim grumbled.  “The things I do for you, Beesley.”

---------

When Meredith arrived, she asked Jim to sign her cast.  As she handed Jim a Sharpie and lifted her skirt, Jim thought, “The weird thing is that this doesn’t even make the top one hundred strange things that have happened to me since I came to work at Dunder Mifflin.”  But as he snuck a look at a smirking Pam he thought, “She’s worth it.”

---------

After Dwight began his contest with the Dunder Mifflin website to see who would be the top salesman, Pam’s resistance to pranking the uptight salesman wavered.  After the air horn went off, she agreed with her boyfriend.  Sometimes it was a good thing that he wasn’t a perfect person.

---------

They meet for lunch in the break room, happy for a few moments of relative peace in a day of air horns, Michael gloating, and death glares from accounting.

“So, you said you had something special planned for tomorrow night,” Pam ventured.  “Should I pack a bag?”

Jim smirked, knowing he had managed to arouse Pam’s curiosity.  And anything that made Pam aroused was good in his book.  “Nope, there’s nothing you need to bring.  But I really think you’ll like it.”

“That’s all you’re going to say,” Pam said with fake exasperation.

“Yep,” Jim replied smugly.

“What if I already have plans for Friday?”

“Well then, I think you should break them.  You won’t be disappointed.”

She was just about to respond to that when Michael barged into the break room.  With his too-wide smile, he announces that he has two tickets to the launch party in New York. 

Pam meets Jim’s eyes.  It would be nice to spend the anniversary of their meeting in New York.  Maybe they could take Friday off and make it a long weekend in the City. 

“Are they ready for that?” Pam thought to Jim,

“What are we waiting for?” Jim thought. 

Michael had been barking about something, but it couldn’t be that important.

“Sure,” Jim said.

“Great,” Michael responded enthusiastically.  “I was thinking Pam, but a boy’s night out would be good, too.”

Jim and Pam began processing the information.  Pam reached the finish line first.  “One of the tickets is for Michael,” she said.  The painful realization was evident on Jim’s face.

“Well, you two decide and let me know,” Michael said, showing unusual sensitivity by letting them reach a decision in private.  The last thing he wanted was to intrude on their relationship.  At least as long as he was with Jan.  When he told his girlfriend that Pam had seen his penis, the look that she gave him was truly frightening.

As soon as the door closed, both Jim and Pam say, “Not it.”

Pam declared herself the winner.

“No way,” Jim argued, surprising Pam a little.  “I guess there are some things he’s willing to fight about,” she thought.  And of course, one of them was spending hours trapped in a car with Michael. 

Still, after Diwali, Pam had sworn that she would never let herself be trapped alone in a car with Michael again.  “Tie goes to the girlfriend,” she stated.

Phrased that way, Jim couldn’t argue.  But that meant there was no way he was going to tell her what he’d planned for Friday night.  Let her stew on that for the evening while he was quarantined with Michael.

---------

As he prepared to with Michael, Jim whispered a few things to Pam.  They decided on the next message Pam would be emailing Dwight using the new email account they had set up for the computer.

Pam said, “So, I guess I’m spending tonight at my place, all alone.”

“Well, you can sleep at my place, but I won’t be in until late if I know Michael.”

“So you aren’t worried about me finding anything that will spoil the surprise for tomorrow?”

“Oh no, everything is placed in a secured location,” Jim assured her.

“Really,” Pam said.  “And you’re not going to give me any hints?”  She put on her biggest pout.

“Okay,” Jim relented.  “Just think about our journey,” he whispered.  “Look in my photo album if it’ll help.”

And with that, Michael and Jim left for New York.

There were times when Pam almost hated Michael Scott.  As Jim and Michael drove away, she allowed herself a few moments of righteous anger.  It would have been so perfect – spending the anniversary of the day she first met Jim in New York.  It would have been fun, spontaneous; just what she wanted for their first trip. 

Kelly had told Pam a few weeks ago that the first time a couple goes on a trip together is critical to their relationship (according to Cosmo, at least).  And suddenly October was melting into November, which meant that Thanksgiving and Christmas were looming ahead.  There would be visits to parents and meeting families; it was everything a first night away together shouldn’t be.  She didn’t want their first trip to be relatives comparing Jim to Roy or her to whoever the last girl Jim had brought home.  All that talk about marriage and babies and broken engagements.

When Michael mentioned New York, the place where Jim had turned down Corporate and Karen and come home to her, and Jim had looked at her so encouragingly, saying without talking that he wanted to go with her – it had been another step back to being the guy she’d fallen in love with.  Then Michael had to spoil it by saying there was only one ticket.  Now any other trip before the holidays would seem forced.  It just wasn’t fair.

---------

There were times Jim Halpert almost pitied Michael Scott.  After Ryan told his former boss on no uncertain terms that he couldn’t attend the big party Dunder Mifflin’s website launch, Michael had alternated between cursing and crying for most of the trip back. 

Frankly this was the best Jim could have hoped for when he got in the car with his boss.  He had already fully envisioned the terrors Michael could have inflicted on him that evening:  trying to grab the spotlight by taking credit as Ryan’s mentor and being brutally shot down by the former temp; announcing to David Wallace that Jim was so much happier “doing” Pam than he could ever be in New York; the glories of Jan’s new boobs; getting drunk and trying to start a conga line.  All of them could have happened that night.  Even discounting Michael, it would have been noisy and pretentious; and Ryan would have been condescending.  Frankly the only reason he went, even though he had CLEARLY said “not it,” before Pam, was that he didn’t really like the thought of Pam having to deal with Ryan, Michael, and driving to New York by herself.  It would have been a crappy anniversary present.

When he thought of his anniversary present for Pam, he smiled.  He had worked on it for a month and he was pretty proud of himself. 

---------

When Pam saw Jim and Michael return, she could see the sadness in her boyfriend’s eyes.  That almost washed away the anger she had felt toward her boss earlier.  Then Michael insulted Angela, and Pam’s feelings of anger resurfaced.

Angela was a difficult, exasperating person, no doubt.  But she was still upset with the loss of Sprinkles, her cat.  Since the accountant’s breakup with Dwight, it was as if Pam tried to console Angela while Jim played the same role for Dwight.  It was a strange universe, indeed.  Angela didn’t need the grief she was getting from Michael.

Jim caught the look on Pam’s face as Michael retreated to his office to plan.  He approached her desk and heard his girlfriend grumble, “What happened this time?”

“The invitation was for the online party,” Jim said with a shrug.

“How did you figure…”

“Looked at the invitation.  The WWW kind of gave it away.”  He shook his head sadly.

Pam sighed in exasperation at her boss.  “You know he’s going to be impossible tonight.”

“Probably,” Jim agreed.

“He’s going to drive Angela insane,” Pam said, worriedly.

Jim smirked, “That seems more like a stroll than a drive.”  He saw the anger on Pam’s face and backed up a step.  “Sorry,”

Seeing Jim’s reaction, Pam caught herself.  “No, I’m sorry.  It’s just that Angela’s already been stressing so much over this party and for Michael to act like….”

“Michael,” Jim supplied.

“Yeah,” Pam sighed.

“Hey,” Jim suggested, “Why don’t we grab a soda?”

“Yeah, I think I could use a minute away from here,” Pam agreed.

“Bad Day?” Jim asked as he handed her a Coke.

“It’s just, Michael’s getting to me a little more than usual,” Pam said, not wanting to let on that she had been dreaming of a night in New York with Jim for the last hour.

A plan began to form in Jim’s mind.  It wouldn’t be that big a deal to give Pam her present tonight.  It might even be proper, given the nature of their relationship…

---------

When Michael announced that he had bought pizzas from “Pizza by Alfredo’s,” Jim snuck a look over at Pam.  That had been one of the places the warehouse guys had gone sometimes after work.  The all-you-can-eat pizza was just as bad as Kevin indicated, but the beer was cheap and the wings were so hot as to be dare-worthy.

Pam was shaking her head at the unwelcome memories of Friday night’s spent watching her then-fiancé get drunk while nibbling inedible food; followed by those wonderful times when Roy had drank the hot sauce for a bet and ended up throwing up all over the bathroom floor.  Of course the bet was usually pitchers of beer at “Pizzas by Alfredo,” allowing the miraculous circle on non-life to continue.

When the kid from the pizza place showed up, Pam’s mood darkened even further.  He had been working the kitchen on one particularly memorable evening when Roy had lifter her top to show “how hot his Pammy” was.  The little creep gave his best leer to her as she phoned her boss.

Michael snapped back at Pam on the phone, and for her, that was the last straw.

Michael tried to get the kid to take a half-off coupon for the pizzas, and when the kid wouldn’t do it, Michael locked him in the conference room.  Locked him in the conference room twenty minutes before they were supposed to do a live webcast.

Jim glanced at Pam for backup as he approached his boss’s office.  He was surprised when she stayed at her desk, typing away on the computer.

The only productive thing that happened while Jim was trying to get through to Michael was that Kevin announced that since they were in a hostage situation anyway, they might at least enjoy good pizza.

Jim left Michael’s office and tried to catch Pam’s eye.  Her head remained down. 

That was when he decided that regardless of what happened with Michael, he wasn’t going to let Pam stay this upset on their anniversary if he could help it.  When he suggested that they meet on the roof with some good pizza, she jumped at the idea.

Jim couldn’t help but smile.  With this much going on, the camera crew couldn’t afford to follow them.  His plan was coming together.

---------

Jim set up the chairs for Pam and himself and put the pizza down.  He handed Pam a wrapped present, “Happy Anniversary.”

“But I thought we were doing this tomorrow?”

“Since we might be in jail tomorrow,” Jim observed, “I thought it would probably be good to go ahead and give you this.”

Pam broke into the first smile Jim had seen from her in hours as she tore into the wrapping paper like a child.  “It’s a book.”

“Yes, it’s a special book,” Jim said.  “Wait a minute,” he said before she opened it.  “Start from the last page…please?”

“Okay,” Pam said hesitantly.  She opened the back cover, “Hey, it’s us at the fun run.  How did you…”

“I made a deal with the camera guys,” Jim explained.  “I told them I wanted some stuff for a present for you and mentioned how easy it would be for us to stop interviewing about anything other than Dunder Mifflin official business.  They wouldn’t let me see any of the footage, but they said that they’d pick some photos of us together that I could use for this.”

“Wow, this is so cool,” Pam said.  “So, have you thought how much we must be in the documentary if they’re willing to give us pictures?”

“I’m trying really hard not to,” Jim admitted.  “Anyway, look at the pictures and stuff.”

Pam could tell that Jim was excited for her to see his gift.  Jim had said that he wished he could be artistic like she was, but Pam could see that Jim expressed his creative side often, in his pranks, in how he dealt with Michael, and in the ways he expressed his love for her.  She happily turned the pages.

There were ticket stubs, copies of sketches Pam made as well as the sketch that Jim had made of her.  She wondered when he made the copy; it was always on her desk.  There was a picture of her and Jim in the conference room when the camera crew “outed” their relationship; separate pictures of them when Jim asked her out in the conference room; a gold medal; hugging at the lake; Jim and Pam in sombreros laughing (“oh yeah,” Pam remembered, “after Andy punched the wall”); their hug when Jim returned to Scranton; their kiss on casino night; Pam grabbing Jim’s hand as she tried to make him watch bands for her wedding to Roy.  It was when she looked at the picture of Jim and her skating during Michael’s birthday that it struck her; Jim’s expression as he tried to make sure she didn’t fall; he was so focused on her.  How had she ever missed it?

She looked at the picture of them on deck during the Booze Cruise.  She wished either of them would have been a little braver that night.  Then a picture from their “first date,” as Jim had called it.  Sitting together on the roof, just was they were tonight.  She noted the look on Jim’s face when she showed him the doves she’d made for the closing ceremonies of the first Office Olympics.  Then as now he was always so proud of the things she created.

The next picture shocked her.  She was kissing Jim!  “Wh-when did this…”

“Dundies,” Jim supplied.

“Oh my God,” Pam whispered.  “No wonder Angela gave me the lecture about the behavior of an engaged woman.  I had no idea…”

“You didn’t remember?” Jim asked, sadly.

“I’d had a lot to drink that night.”

“I always wondered if you didn’t remember or if it hadn’t meant that much…”

“No,” Pam said hurriedly.  “If I would have remembered, it would have meant something.”

“Good,” Jim said, looking into her eyes.  “That’s good to know.”

The next picture showed her asleep on Jim’s shoulder; Jim’s caring smile.  How long had he loved her?

The next page, though, was the big surprise.  It was Jim and Pam at Cugino’s.  She looked at her hairstyle.  She didn’t have her hair back yet.  When could that have…

Jim could tell that she was confused.  “It was my first week at Dunder Mifflin when I took you to Cugino’s.  There was a guy from the paper, he was taking pictures for the weekend section and he took one of us.  I hadn’t seen him; he took it while we were waiting for our meal.  He came up when you were in the bathroom, wanted to know our names.” 

“Why didn’t you…”

“You had just told me that you were engaged to Roy.  He came up and asked if we would mind if the paper printed our picture and I said that it probably wouldn’t be a good idea.  But I managed to get him to send me a print.  I was always afraid to show it to you; afraid that it would make me look pathetic.”

Pam looked at the picture again.  They were sitting, leaning in towards each other, her hands on his elbow as he told a story.   Yeah, Roy would have had a problem with that.

“How long?” Pam asked.

Jim knew what Pam was asking, but her turned it into a joke, “Pam, if you don’t know the answer to that question, you REALLY haven’t been paying attention.”

“Seriously, Jim, when did you know you liked me?” 

The camera crew had finally noticed they were gone and were up on the roof.  So much for the perfect moment.

“It was that first day,” Jim admitted.  “When you told me to remember this day, because my life would never be the same once I met my desk mate, Dwight.”

“What about you?” Jim challenged.

“When you said that, ‘I know this might sound weird and I have no way of knowing this, but that mixed berry yogurt you’re about to eat has expired.”

“And that’s when you knew you liked me?” Jim asked.  He remembered that day.  He was trying to find Dwight’s lunch so that he could put a cockroach in the bag, when he noticed Pam’s yogurt had expired.  He had sat at his desk for thirty-seven minutes trying to think of a way to tell Pam that wouldn’t make her think he was the world’s biggest dork.  He wasn’t sure if he’d been successful.

“Yep.”

"Can we pick some other moment?”

“Nope,” Pam said with a smile.

At that moment, a voice from the parking lot shouted, “Dunder Mifflin Sucks!”

“Delivery Guy?” Jim asked.

“Delivery Guy,” Pam confirmed.

Pam was giddy as she drove into work. She had something in her purse that would blow Jim's mind. She smiled as she saw Jim waiting outside in the crisp autumn air. He was looking so cute, his face lighting up at her approach, that Pam completely forgot what she wanted to share with him.

Jim started walking towards the front door of the office building, away from any prying eyes gazing down from the conference room or Michael's office. He did a quick scan of the parking lot, and seeing the coast was clear, drew Pam close to him and kissed her.

"Poor shy Jim," Pam thought as she kissed her boyfriend. They continued their embrace as they made their way inside, as they waited for the elevator, and as they rode up to their floor. Jim reluctantly pulled away just before the elevator doors opened.

Pam looked at Jim mischievously and pushed the door closed button. She smiled at his puzzled expression and said, "Darn, it's too late," as the door closed. "Oh well, I guess we need to go back to the first floor and try again," she said, pulling him back to her.

"Sometimes you just miss the window," Jim agreed as the elevator started down again.

When they reached to ground floor, Jim tried to step away from her. Pam smiled and continued to hold him close. The door opened to Kelly's over-caffeinated, oh-so-smiling, face.

"Oh, you guys are so cute," Kelly gushed.

Pam snuck a quick glance over at her blushing boyfriend.

"Sorry," Jim managed.

"Don't worry about it," Kelly said. "It's not like you guys are that old or anything. Once I caught Phyllis and her husband..."

"Bob Vance, Vance refrigeration," Pam supplied with a giggle.

"Whatever," Kelly continued, "And they were all over each other. It was SO gross."

"Sorry?" Jim managed, trying to work out what he was supposed to say. Kelly didn't appear to notice.

"Anyway, don't be surprised if you guys open the door one day and it's Darryl and me in here," Kelly continued, bouncing on her toes.

Jim and Pam silently wished that the elevator would speed up.

---

Later that morning, while Jim was grabbing a soda, Pam rushed into the break room behind him. She was carrying a small paperback book.

"There's something I wanted to tell you this morning," she began excitedly.

"And the sight of me in the parking lot drove it right out of your head," Jim chuckled.

Pam risked a look around, "Yeah, you looked so pitiful waiting for me,"

"Pitiful?" Jim asked. "Believe me, I don't do pitiful." He thought about that for a minute. "Well, not any more." He managed a smile at the thought.

"Anyway," Pam said, not about to be put off a second time, "One of my friends in art class loaned me a book last night. It's like, the greatest thing ever for us."

"Wow. Let me have it."

"It's called Jitterbug Perfume and it's by Tom Robbins."

Jim thought for a moment. "Nope, can't say I've heard of it. Why is this the greatest thing ever for us and not for everybody else?"

Pam was beaming. All she kept thinking was, "Jim is going to love this SO much." Finally, she opened the book and began reading, "This is how it starts, ‘The beet is the most intense of vegetables...'"

"IT DOES NOT," Jim managed, almost speechless.

"Shut it," Pam hushed, unconsciously imitating her boss. Chastened, Jim was silent, so Pam could continue reading, "The radish, admittedly is more feverish, but the fire of a radish is a cold fire, the fire of discontent, not of passion. Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes a current of frivolity. Beets are deadly serious."

"Oh my god," Jim started. "I'll never be able to look Dwight in the face again."

"There's more," Pam said breathlessly, "it says, ‘the beet is the melancholy vegetable, the one most willing to suffer. You can't squeeze blood out of a turnip."

Jim was so proud of his girlfriend, he could cry. "There are no words Beesly." He shook his head slowly. "Well done."

"I started reading it last night," Pam said. "I'm marking the good parts for you."

"It is going to be so hard to work today," Jim chuckled.

Later Pam transferred a call from someone with a German accent to Dwight. Puzzled, she listened as he talked about Schrute Farm. A quick Google query found it on Trip Advisor. There were pictures. An old woman was sitting while Dwight was splitting wood. There was a caption that the farm, "catered to the elderly." After listening to Dwight's sales pitch, which floundered when he admitted that the only beds were twin sized, Pam knew what she had to do.

She avoided Jim's panicked expression when she made a reservation for two that evening at Dwight's farm. In her mind, this was perfect. She would have a night away with Jim before the holidays and family visits intruded. As soon as she finished making the reservation, she walked into the break room, knowing that Jim would be hot on her heels.

"Pam, what are you doing?" He was clearly worried that his girlfriend had gone insane.

"Oh come on," Pam replied. "Haven't you always wanted to see what Dwight's farm was like?"

Jim thought about that and she could see the idea growing on him. "Well..."

"It'll be great!" she promised, her eyes wide.

"But why are we making a reservation for tonight? I mean we have to work tomorrow."

"We get it over with," Pam said, "then we can have the whole weekend to mock it. Besides, do you really want to waste a weekend with Dwight?"

"You have a point there," Jim agreed. "So, are we really gonna do this?"

Pam looked at him expectantly.

"Okay." Jim said, shaking his head.

---

They met at Pam's place for the drive to the farm. Pam was bouncing on her toes by the time Jim knocked on her door. She tossed Jim her bag and smiled at his slight shrug as they walked to his car. She had left her new paperback on her nightstand with deep regrets, knowing that if she read it to Jim their laughter would probably keep Dwight up.

As they pulled onto the dirt road that led to the farm, Jim marveled, "I can't believe this is real." They were actually glad that the cameras followed them to the beet farm. They knew that without some video proof, nobody would believe the scenes that followed.

After Dwight's bedtime story, Jim and Pam settled into their bedroom for the night, the camera's finally kicked out. "So," Jim said, "I'm sure if you asked nicely, you could get Mose to tuck you in."

Pam suppressed a shiver. "Please, don't even go there."

Jim sat on his bed and looked over to Pam. "So, how are we going to do this?"

Pam suppressed a smile. "What do you mean?"

Jim looked at his bed and then over at hers. "I mean, what are we going to do about the beds?"

"We both have one," Pam noted. "So I guess we'll just sleep and that will be it." She really didn't think they should sleep together tonight; it would just be too strange.

"Huh," Jim muttered. He settled in under the sheets, as did Pam. She snuck a look at him as she cut off the light.

Before they could fall asleep, they began to hear a strange, banging sound. Pam ventured out and saw Mose using an outhouse. The look on his face as he saw her totally freaked her out. She hurried back to the irrigation room.

"So, what was it?" Jim asked.

"Never mind," Pam replied. "Just help me push these beds together."

Jim almost put up an argument, then he realized that if the beds were together he'd be touching Pam, and he decided to help her.

Shortly after they had pushed the beds together and had snuggled together, they heard moaning. Pam pushed Jim out of bed saying, "Your turn."

Seeing Dwight so heartbroken brought back unwelcome memories for Jim. He held Pam close to him all night, but sleep wouldn't come.

---

The next day, Jim and Pam struggled through an artery-clogging breakfast and made their way into work. They were confident that the sleepless night would be something they'd be talking about for years.

But Jim couldn't shake the memories Dwight had stirred up. He was quiet most of the day, reliving the thousand times he'd looked at Pam with love, only to have her smile and leave with Roy. How after Michael read out his complaint about Pam planning her wedding during work time that he'd gone home and cried, ready to do anything if it would take the pain away, even for a moment.

If Jan hadn't told him about the job before casino night, he didn't think he would have survived. That night had been the last straw. It was like all the color had drained out of his world except for the blue of her dress. When she told him she'd misinterpreted their friendship, he had wanted to die.

When Angela announced she wanted to date Andy, Dwight had crumbled, just as Jim had so many times before. He followed the farmer and told him, the best that he could, how he had gone through the same thing.

That's when Jim realized; he had been scared to come back completely to Pam. He'd been afraid, afraid to show others how he felt about her, afraid that he might say or do something wrong that would drive her away. So he had tried to hold part of himself back. But it didn't make any difference. Pam would always hold his heart. And he just had to trust in her love and compassion. Holding back, in the end, wouldn't change a thing.

The certainty gave Jim a clarity that he'd lacked for years. He strode purposely back to the office, kissing Pam at her desk, daring anyone to raise objections.

And that's when Pam knew that the Jim she'd fallen in love with was back.