It's not at all what she expected.  Having had previous proposal experience she thought she'd almost figured it out.   The rain beat down on the roof of the car and she hugged her jacket a bit tighter around her.  Smiling she leaned forward and adjusted the radio.

As much as she tried to pretend, it had been disappointing not having things settled before she left for New York.  She realized now that her instincts weren't off, that Jim had had something up his sleeve on the night of Toby's party but the whole Andy and Angela thing made a mess of it.  After wallowing in her own disappointment for a little bit she put her chin up and made the best of the situation.

And in return he had been so...great.  About absolutely everything.  

Like...helping her pack, to decide where to live, googling, questing, plotting out the best and quickest route to Brooklyn.   Helping her decide that being an RA would give her free board.  Once the decision was made it had also caused her to feel less self conscious about being one of the oldest people there.  He knew her so well.

A few nights before she left, one of the rare ones they didn't spend together she had let these nagging doubts creep in, thinking maybe the fact that he was so encouraging, so supportive of her leaving meant that where she thought they were headed wasn't quite where they'd end up.   She realized her fears were unwarranted when he showed up on her doorstep early the next morning bearing two cups of coffee and a box of donuts.

He stood there, clothes rumpled, eyes tired, stubble peppering his cheeks.  He looked like he had gotten about as much sleep as she had.

"This sucks.  What am I gonna do without you?"  He'd sighed as he walked through the door. 

Needless to say - the coffee wound up going cold.

Of all the ways she thought he'd ask this wasn't at all how she'd pictured it.  They'd talked it through, so thoroughly that she didn't expect it now - not today.  She had expected nothing until she got back and they were settled in - and together - again.  If she knew him as well as she thought she did she had thought he was probably planning something extravagant.  She had been secretly hoping he would.

Driving to meet  him she'd spent the time contemplating how to get him to follow her back to New York.  Kids don't play tee ball in the rain do they?  Surely his nephew's game would be cancelled.

As she'd watched his car pull up her heart skipped a beat.  She wondered now if it would always be that way. 

xoxoxo

Standing on the ridiculous scale, he couldn't stop grinning like an idiot.  He honestly almost didn't believe he'd done it.  Of all the times and plans he'd made this was the one that actually made it to fruition.

It wasn't supposed to happen this way.  He'd tucked away his recent quarterly bonus and had made reservations at this really fancy Italian place and the Ritz-Carlton for the last weekend she'd be in New York.   He'd been pretty sure Pam would have protested it was too much but secretly would love it.  

The way all his grandiose plans compared to the way it actually went down made him smile even wider.

He had been trying to be patient, he'd promised himself he would be.  He was good at waiting as far she was concerned.

He loved seeing her like this.  It was an amazing thing to witness.   How confident she'd become - how much she enjoyed all the things she was learning.   She'd always been beautiful to him but now...she simply took his breath away.  He had known it was not going to be easy but it turned out to be incredibly difficult, being here without her.  He'd spent almost every waking (and sleeping, to be honest) hour with her since their first official date.   Right from the beginning it had been so easy all the obstacles that were suddenly in their way had been hard to deal with.  Talking to her on the phone today he'd simply had enough.  He realized he didn't want another day to go by without seeing her.  He didn't want another day to go by without this thing finally becoming official.    There was no reason not to.

All he needed to do was swing by his apartment and pick up the ring.   He had taken a steadying breath as he pulled off the highway.  With just one look at her standing there he had known this was it.  All he had to do was ask.

xoxoxo

Pam jumped slightly as the door opened.  She reached up to swipe at her eyes as the rain swept through the car.  She smiled widely as he settled into the driver's seat.

She glanced down at her ring then into his eyes.  "Done?" 

"Done."  Jim leaned over and ran a hand across her cheek.  He kissed her softly grinning against her lips as he pulled away.   "Just wait a few minutes.  They're setting up now,"

She looked at him, completely confused.  "Setting up?"

"Yeah.  I mean - you don't want a long engagement right?  They just need a few minutes.  Kelly wants to be a bridesmaid - oh and she said she knows how to design a gown out of toilet tissue - so you're good to go.  I'm sure you'll look amazing."  His eyes sparkled as he continued.  "Andy's warming up to sing, Dwight's going to get his recorder."  He reached out to pull her closer.   "Michael - of course - would like to give you away.  Did you know Creed's a registered minister?"

She tried to squirm out of his grasp and couldn't help laughing at him.  "Let's get out of here."

"C'mon Pam.  They're all so excited..."

"Stop it."  She silenced him with a kiss. 

Jim turned the key in the ignition and backed out of the parking spot.  "It's going to be okay.  Your car will be fine.  We'll get it in the morning."

"I'm not worried."

"I'm sorry you're going to miss your class."

She laughed loudly.  "No you're not."

He laughed back at her. "You're right.  No I'm not." 

They rode in comfortable silence for a few blocks.  She reached over and took his hand in hers.  He brushed his lips over her knuckles and she gave his fingers a squeeze.

"Did you call your mom?"

"I did."

"And?"

"And she said congratulations.  She's very happy for us."  Pam's cheeks flushed slightly as she stared down at her lap.  She ran a finger over the stone in her ring.    It was so beautiful - so unlike the first ring she wore on this finger.  She shook her head, wanting to think about the present, not the past.  She realized Jim was still talking.

"Good.  So now your dad won't keep giving me those looks..."

Her eyes widened.   "What looks?"

"The 'what are you waiting for' looks."  Jim chuckled.  "Ever since I asked him..."

"Wait..."  Pam laid a hand on his arm.  "What are you saying?"

"What?"

"Jim.  Did you ask my dad if you could marry me?"

"Yeah."  He nodded.  "That's how you do it right?"  He laughed at the look on her face.  "It was a while ago though and I think he wondered what was taking me so long..."

Pam sucked in a breath and blew it out slowly.  "Okay, pull over."

"Huh? What?"

"Pull over a second."

He signaled and then eased the car to the curb.   He put the car in park and then turned to face her.  "What's the matter?"

She unhooked her seatbelt and framed his face in her hands kissing him soundly. She threaded her fingers in his hair as she deepened the kiss, pressing herself closer until she was practically sitting in his lap.

"I love you."  She whispered as she pulled away.  Her elbow knocked into the horn, the sharp sound causing them both to jump. 

He blushed as his eyes searched her face; the only thought that filled his mind was how he couldn't quite believe this was happening.  He'd missed so many chances had been begun to think he'd never see the day.

"I love you too."

She ran a hand over his chest and tugged at his tie.  Her eyes flitted away from his and back again.  "We should get you out of these wet clothes." She leaned close to kiss him again.

She shifted back to the passenger seat.  He smiled widely as he put the car back into drive.  "That's a great idea."

xoxoxo

The rain continued to pound, the blinds clanging softly against the window in the wind.  Hours earlier they had stumbled towards the bedroom, a trail of sodden clothes in their wake.

"I don't know how you sleep in that bed you have at school."  Jim ducked his head and pressed his lips against her temple. 

"I sleep just fine."  Pam turned and tilted her face up towards Jim's.  She twined her leg around one of his.  "You're just too tall."  She snuggled closer.  "Are our kids going to be tall do you think?"

It felt as if his heart stopped beating for a moment.  It was amazing, after all this time, to realize that conversations like this were real.  This really could - and  would - happen.

His voice seemed to get stuck in his throat.  "M-maybe."

"Fifty-fifty chance right?"

"There a bouts."

Pam sighed contentedly as she ran a finger over his lips.  "I hope they look like you."

He rolled his eyes.  "Yeah.  That'll be great.  Girls would kill for this hairstyle."

"Ha!  Okay, maybe not but boys would kill for your jump shot."

"I know right?  I always say the Sixers missed out."  He laughed and stared into her eyes, twirling a stray curl around his finger.  "Girls would kill for this hairstyle."

"Shows how little you know.  Girls are fickle.  If they have straight hair they wish it was curly...and the other way around..."

He brushed her hair off her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead.  "Well we've got some time to figure it out though huh?"

"Yeah."  She nodded solemnly.  "We've got some time."

Pam turned on her back, bringing Jim with her.  Instead of frantic and hurried this time was slow and incredibly sweet every touch, every kiss just stood to confirm how much he loved her, how much she loved him.   They were so in synch now it was almost like they had created a sort of choreographed dance - he'd move just slightly and she'd follow right along.  Watching him watch her Pam's heart was so full she thought it might burst.  As disappointed as she had been a few months ago it was alright now.  This was definitely worth waiting for.

Jim rolled on his side, pulling her against him.  As he did her hand slid over the one he rested on her stomach. 

"It'll be easier now - don't you think?"  She whispered into the darkness.

"Hmmm?"

"Me being at school...you being here.  It'll be easier knowing for sure where we're headed."  He could tell she was trying to be brave, but the tremor in her voice gave her away. "Right?"

"It's never easy being away from you."  He admitted, his lips grazing the back of her neck.  He felt her back stiffen and pulled her closer, his voice softening.  "But I'm so proud of you Pam.  I'm so glad you're doing this.  You're so talented - it killed me that you were wasting it..."

"You're talented too."

He laughed half-heartedly.  "I don't know what you've heard - but pranking Dwight isn't all that lucrative."

"I meant at your job.  I know you might not want to hear this but you're really good at it."

"Stop."  He brushed his lips against her neck again.

She tugged on his fingers.  "No - you stop.  You are.   You're a really good salesman, Jim.  People love you and they trust you.  That's not an easy thing to get people to do."

"You may have a point.  I did sell you on spending the rest of your life with me."

She smiled as his arms tightened around her.   "That was easy.  I know a good deal when I see it."

He grinned and pressed his lips close to her ear.  "Lucky for me, then."

She had known she would surprise him.

The whole drive home she imagined the look on his face, a mixture of shocked and delighted with a dash of self-satisfaction.  She knew, though he might not say it exactly, that he'd think she'd come home because of him.  She had been determined to prove him wrong.

Well.  Make that slightly wrong.

Her grades had given them a second opportunity to discuss her stay in New York.  The first came when he'd overheard Alex.  

She had rushed to explain then, to make a joke and laugh it off.  He'd just listened while she babbled a mile a minute about how crazy that was and who did he think he was telling her she couldn't have a career anywhere but New York.  

But she knew he didn't exactly buy it.  He'd been too quiet.  He'd barely said a word while she prattled on.  She remembered how he half-heartedly mumbled, "Something to think about" as she continued to protest.  She's not sure he ever actually believed her when she said that she'd learned all she needed to and that she wanted to come home.

Maybe he'd get the message now.

xoxoxo

He wasn't that guy. 

At least that's what he'd kept telling himself all these months.  He wasn't the jealous guy, or the guy who would hold her back.  He was the supportive guy, the guy who believed she could do anything she set her mind to.

He believed all that.  He just thought that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel.

It hadn't been easy but he'd learned to function without her sitting six feet away from him.   Sure, he'd spent a year sitting that close to her but feeling miles away before but this was - in some ways - much worse.

He never imnagined that'd be possible. 

Selfish or not he had to acknowledge the truth.  He wanted her here.  He wanted her with him.  He wanted them to finally start their lives together because though they'd only been engaged a few months he'd been waiting more than a few years for this.  Still thoughts like that made him feel alternatively pathetic and incredibly selfish.   He wanted her to understand that no matter what she chose he would be there.

He couldn't help but hope that she'd choose him.

xoxoxo

They drove to Jim's apartment, their apartment now, in relative silence.   Once there Pam got to the front door first and bounced on her heels as she turned the key.  His hands settled on her hips as he pressed a kiss to the back of her neck.  She sighed and leaned against him as they made their way inside.

Pam turned in his arms as she led him through the door, tugging impatiently on his hands as she dragged him over the threshold.   She moaned softly as his lips finally met hers again.   Reluctantly she eased away from him, chuckling at the look on his face.   

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

He squinted and pursed his lips, trying to suppress a smirk.  "Like what?"

"You know like what."

His eyes glittered with a mix of amusement and desire.  His voice was soft and slightly dangerous as he replied, "You'll find out".

He pulled away slowly to lift the strap of his bag over his head.  As he let go it fell with a soft thud.

She pushed his suit jacket off his shoulders as her own bag slipped off her arm. Her coat followed quickly, cascading to the floor to form a puddle at her feet.

Jim leaned down and snagged her around the waist, lifting her up till her eyes were level with his.  His lips sought hers as he carried her towards the bedroom, stumbling slightly over the week's worth of laundry littering the floor.

Pam opened her mouth in an attempt to tease him about what a slob he was but the opportunity passed quickly.  His lips, impatient and incredibly insistent, silenced her again.

Her feet hit the edge of the mattress and her eyes fluttered closed as he placed her down in the center of the bed. 

Her arms slid around him pulling him closer.  She shivered as his breath grazed her ear.  "Really missed you..."

"You too."  Pam replied as she tugged at his hair and pulled his mouth back towards hers. 

Their hands made quick work of buttons and zippers as the sunlight that streamed through the window started to fade.  His hands and his mouth were demanding yet gentle.  As he moved above her his eyes searched her face.  He smiled widely as he kissed her again.

It had only been about a week since she'd last been with him but there was something so urgent about the way he touched her now.  It was an almost familiar sensation and Pam's mind wandered back to the first time they were together like this.   She realized that it felt the same now as it did then, like they both couldn't wait but were conscious that this was something to be savored.    

Her last coherent thought was how good it was to be home.

xoxoxo

Jim slid his hand over the sheet surprised to find it cold to the touch.  He struggled to open his eyes wondering if he'd imagined that she had been there.   A smile tugged at his lips as he saw Pam's shirt hanging on the bed post, right where he'd tossed it earlier.   Slipping his boxers back on he went to search for her.

He found her in the kitchen, dressed in his tee shirt, huddled over the table with her hands curled around a mug of tea.

"Boy you're quiet.  I didn't even hear the kettle."

Pam shrugged and titled her head.  "Microwave.  It's how I used to make it at school."

"Ahh."  Jim scratched the back of his neck and yawned as he walked towards the table, taking the seat across from her.  He reached out and eased the mug from her hands inhaling deeply before taking a sip. "Cinnamon?"

"Chai.  I found it in the cupboard.  I must have left it here...before I left."

"Tastes good."

"Yeah."  Pam nodded as he slid the mug back over to her. 

"Wanna talk about it?"

"There's not much to say."  She traced the handle with her finger.  "I'm an art school drop out."

"One class doesn't make you a drop out."  Jim replied.  He gazed at her intently, trying to read her mood.  "You sure you're okay with this?"

"It's hard not to be."

"C'mon.  You know what I mean.  You can still go back if you want to finish what you started.  That is if you really want to."

"I don't want to.  I'm finished.  I really don't like graphic design."

"Okay."

"It's that simple.  I hate computers and I wanted to come home."

"I know."  Jim placed his hands over hers.  "So now tell me the rest of it."

"Jim."

"I know there's more to it than that."

"There's not..."

He leaned over and silenced her with a kiss.  "Spill it."

Pam took a steadying breath.  Her voice was small and quiet when she finally spoke.  "I could have avoided this.   This whole thing..."

"What do you mean?"

"If I'd taken Jan up on that internship a few years ago I would have known then that I hated it."

"True.  But you weren't ready..."

"I-maybe I was.  If I'd only listened to you I could have..."

"Well, you can't go back and change things.  The point is you found out - just a little later.  No use worrying about it now.  It kind of is what it is..."

"Right - because if I could go back and change things..."  She bit her lip and ducked her head.  "Never mind."

His heart tightened in his chest as he gazed over at her.  "Hey.  I thought we'd moved past all that..."

"I know.  We did..."  Pam shook back her hair and met his eyes.   "I don't want to ruin this."

He gave her hand a squeeze as he promised.  "Not possible."

"I don't want to be away from you when we should be together planning the wedding."

"And I can't wait for us to do that but I don't want you to come home just because of me."

"Didn't you hear what I said?"  Pam sniffled and smiled.  "It has absolutely nothing to do with you."

"Yeah."  He ran a hand over her cheek.  "I heard you."

"That's not a bad thing by the way.  It's not like you didn't come home for me once.  I figure I might owe you a little."

"You owe me nothing.  Look.  I am so happy you are home.  I'm not going to lie about that.  But I want you to do what you need to do.  And if you need to be in New York..."

"I need to be with you.   New York isn't all it's cracked up to be despite what some people might think.  I mean, I loved it and I'm glad I went but coming home doesn't mean I'm done with school.  I can go here."

"Sure.  Plus that wasn't what that was all about anyway.  He just wanted to keep you there to try and steal you from me."

Pam rolled her eyes.  "Jim.  Stop it."

He grabbed her left hand and toyed with her ring.   "You forget that I heard him.  I know that speech.  I gave that speech.  Although mine was better - if I do say so myself."

"That was completely different."  She tried to pull her hand away.  "One more time.  Alex is not in love with me."

"Right."

"More importantly...I am not in love with Alex.  I'm in love with you."  Pam blew out a breath.  "Though there are moments, like this one, when I forget exactly why."

Jim smiled smugly.  "No you don't."

"No.  I don't."  Pam sighed, exaggerating just a bit.   It was infuriating.  She simply couldn't stay angry with him.  She laughed in spite of herself.   "Lucky for you."

The laughter faded as their eyes met again.    "Sure you're okay?" 

"Yeah.  I'm sure."

"OK.  Now are you sure you don't want to have a double wedding with Angela and Andy?  Rumor has it they decided on a location."

"I'm even more sure of that."  Pam laughed again as she took another sip of tea.  "So?  Where are they getting married?"

"Oh.  I didn't tell you?"  He moved to the cupboard.  His face was concealed but Pam could hear the smile in his voice.   He was grinning widely when he emerged, holding a bag of cookies triumphantly. "They are getting married at...."  He paused for dramatic effect.  "Dwight's farm."  

"Shut. Up."

He held his hand up as he sat down again.  "Scout's honor."

She blinked furiously, still not able to process.  "B-b-but - that's crazy."

"Indeed.  Oh - also crazy? Ryan, it seems, is back with Kelly."

Pam's expression turned devious upon hearing that bit of news.  "Serves him right."  Her eyes filled with delight as she took a bite of the cookie Jim offered.   "Wow.  It's so good that I came back now." 

"I agree."  Jim smiled as he rubbed his thumb over her bottom lip to brush away a crumb clinging there.  "Perfect timing."

She'd been stunned.  There's no other way to explain it.  She couldn't quite understand what he was saying when they first pulled up at the house.

She could hear the words but they didn't seem to make sense.

"I bought it."

"It's ours."

Not his.  Not mine.  Ours. 

It's amazing how one small word could make such a difference,  how the excitement and trepidation in his voice as he showed her around the house could make her finally relax. 

If there had ever been a doubt in her mind that coming home was the right thing to do it was erased in that instant.

New York had been great.  Pursuing art more seriously than she ever had before had also been great.  But this moment proved once and for all that she didn't have to choose.  She could have both.

She came home because her home was with him.

xoxoxo

He can't help but feel a bit relieved.

It really hadn't occurred to him that he hadn't done the right thing - not until the entire office weighed in.  It was no wonder they'd tried to keep their relationship a secret in the beginning.  There wasn't a soul in their workplace who didn't have an opinion on well...just about anything.

It was a familiar feeling for him where she was concerned.  It had taken a while for him to not second guess every action or word he spoke.  He'd been afraid - in the beginning especially - that he might be moving too fast.

After all, he'd bought her ring a week after their first date.

But all of that disappeared when he saw her face as she glanced around the garage.   He knew that it was going to be alright after that. 

It wasn't too much and it wasn't too soon. 

Finally - his timing was perfect.

xoxoxo

The sound of a basketball hitting the rim resonated through the backyard.   It fell to the cement patio and rolled onto the overgrown grass.

"Impressive."  Pam chuckled.  She settled back in the lawn chair and toyed with the charm on her necklace.

"Just a little bit rusty."  Jim jogged over to retrieve the ball.

"Like that hoop."

He gestured towards the house.  "And, probably, the pipes."

His eyes met hers again and she smiled widely.  "Oh?  Is that a problem?"

"Such optimism, Beesly.  It's admirable I tell you."

Jim dribbled the ball for a moment, threw a foul shot.  It slid threw the net with a swish.    "One night I sat out here and threw like...a hundred of these in a row.  Just like that one. Nothing but net."

"Amazing."  She tilted her head to the side, admiring Jim's form as he went in for a layup.  "So.  Tell me more."

"About the pipes or my amazing basketball skills?" 

"Neither.  About what it was like growing up here."  Pam leaned forward and looked at him intently.  "We've established that you have fond memories of the basketball hoop..."

"Hmmm."  Jim stopped and tucked the ball against his hip.  "That's a great question..."

"Can't be the décor..."

"Nope.  Definitely not."

"Can we talk about that for a second?"  Pam looked at him quizzically.  "I've been here before.  How did I not notice all this stuff?"

"The house was probably crowded.  Kids running around.  Tons of distractions.   And we're all pretty tall.  Someone was probably blocking the most offensive features and you just didn't see it."

"Well that explains it."

"Yeah."  He laughed as he twirled the ball on one finger.

Watching him, as always, was a nice distraction but she wasn't giving up so easy.  "Seriously.  Tell me."

Jim shrugged.  "I don't know.  I loved this backyard in the summer.  We always had at least one or two big barbecues.  All us kids would run around for hours while our parents would sit around and drink beer and chat.  When we got older we'd sneak a few beers ourselves.  It was great."

"So you're saying you were a derelict.  Sounds like fun."  Pam's eyes began to sparkle as she listened to him continue.

"Christmas.  Great memories of Christmas.  Except right before Christmas sucked. Tom and Pete used to torture me..."

"Used to?"

"It was worse then if you believe it."  Jim laughed in spite of himself.  "Anyway - they'd wake me up on a Saturday or Sunday at the end of November, early December - just close enough that Christmas would be on my mind and tell me it was actually Christmas morning.  I'd rush down the stairs and then - of course - nothing."

"Aw.  That's awful!  They are so mean!"

"What's more awful is that I fell for it every single time."   Jim tossed the ball to the side and moved to sit on the chair next to Pam's.  "You sure you're okay with all this?  It's gonna take a lot of work."

Pam seemed nonchalant.  "So?  We can tackle one room at a time."

"I asked my dad - we need new leaders and gutters for sure - but the roof was replaced only about a year or two ago."

"I don't understand half of what you just said but that roof part sounds like a good thing."

"We can do the downstairs first I'm thinking.  Concentrate on what people can see."

She nodded and smiled.  "Perfect."

Jim stared at her in disbelief.  "You're really sure you're okay with all this?"

Pam laughed.  "Why do you seem so surprised?"

"I don't know."  Jim cleared his throat.   "I gotta tell you - I was so caught up in all this it never occurred to me that it might not be the right thing to do.  And then I was really worried I'd screwed up big.   I know I probably should have asked you before I did this and I'm sorry about that..."

Pam reached over and placed a hand over his causing him to stop trying to explain.  "I don't think you understand."  She took a deep breath as she tried collect her thoughts.  Her voice trembled a bit when she spoke again.   "I don't keep score.  Just so you know.  I don't sit around and compare.  Actually it's weird how sometimes I can't even remember what it was like then."

He wasn't quite sure what to do with all that.  "Okay..."

"But then there are moments like this when I realize you're so different.  You...you make plans instead of avoiding them.  And though I love that so much about you - I'm still not really used to it."

Jim smiled smugly.  "Well. You should get used to it."

Pam grinned back at him.  "I'm trying."  Her eyes were dreamy as they met his again.  "You bought me...us...you bought us a house."

"Yeah."  His face relaxed again.  "I did."

"You're amazing."  She said softly, inching closer to him.  "I know it's stupid but sometimes I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop.  And then you go and do something like this and I realize how silly I'm being."

"Yeah."  He agreed as he tugged on her hands until she stood.  She settled down onto his lap and curled her arms around his shoulders.  "Okay.  You need to stop that.  I guess I need to explain again how this works."

"Maybe you do." 

"Alright."  Jim began.  "So it's like this.  Two single people who are attracted to each other often start dating..."

"I think that part I understand."  Pam leaned down and brushed her lips across his.

"Oh okay."  He murmured as she pulled away.  "See - I asked you to marry me - not date me till the next millennium."

"Which I absolutely appreciate."  She replied, moving to kiss him again.

"And so I see no reason - if that's the plan - that we don't keep moving forward."

"You're right - there's no reason."

"As for all this - well - the timing was great.  My mom was stressed about selling the house...I knew that this was something we'd both want eventually and so I thought I'd just see if I could manage it.  I was kinda surprised that I was able to pull it off..."

"I can't believe what you did with the garage..." Pam shook her head at him.  "You're really too much.  The house needs all this work but the first thing you do is make a place for me.'

Jim ducked his head, his face flushing a bit.  "It's nothing.  I just thought..."

"I know what you thought."  She moved closer, her lips a breath away from his as she added.  "And that's just another reason I love you."

Jim's fingers slid through her hair as Pam shifted on his lap, sinking slowly into the kiss.  The sun began to slip behind the trees.  The rustle of leaves fluttering in the breeze and the faint chiming voices of children playing in the distance were the only sounds they could hear.    There seemed to be nothing else - just the two of them. 

The spell was broken with a resounding snap.  The chair collapsed as one of the legs gave way.  Jim's arms tightened around her as they fell to the ground.   Tangled together they were too stunned to speak for moment.

Pam struggled to sit upright, trying to catch her breath and he smiled widely, reaching up to snag a small twig that was now entwined in her hair. 

"I think we might need some new lawn furniture too."  She glanced over at the chair and grinned back at him.

"Maybe."  Jim reached up and pulled her back down towards him.  He kissed her soundly as he added.  "I'll put it on the list."

She'd shown him. 

It was sad, really, how he thought he could beat her - armed only with tiramisu and a compliment.  He should know by now that when she was determined she could be relentless. 

All that aside she'd had such a great time today competing with him, a day that was made even better by emerging victorious.

This is exactly what she'd missed.   Simply being able to have so much fun over something as ridiculous as desk chairs and copy equipment. 

When anyone asked her how she could possibly handle working with her fiancé every day she'd remember today specifically.    It was days just like this one that had caused her to fall in love with him in the first place.

xoxoxo

She had no idea.

All day he'd watched her - pulling out all the stops - working every angle she could think of to get her way.

It'd been a most entertaining way to spend the day.   She'd countered every move he'd made with one of her own, never backing down for a second.  The look on her face when she'd learned she'd won made it worth still having to use that crummy copier.

Well.  Almost.

Today reminded him, once again, how happy he was to have her back home.  There was no one else in this entire world he'd want to spend every minute of the day with.

He still couldn't believe how lucky he was.

xoxoxo

Jim held the door open and watched her sway past him.  She was quite impressed with herself tonight it seemed. 

"So.  Tell me something.  How long has this been going on?" 

Pam rolled her shoulders and shrugged her cardigan off.  She kicked her shoes towards the couch.

"What are you talking about?"

Jim walked to the kitchen, made a quick stop to the fridge and then leaned against the counter, twisting open a beer.  He handed it to Pam and then opened one for himself.

"Your quest for the perfect chair.  This I don't know...Goldilocks complex you seem to have.  It's like you're obsessed.  Did your mom read that story to you too much when you were a kid?"

"Very funny."  She smiled as she took a sip of her beer.

"I have to tell you.  It was more than a little bit disturbing having to listen to you talk about Michael's ass."

Pam almost choked.  Her eyes sparkled with amusement.  "It's quite an ass.  You should take a look at it sometime."

He shook his head.  "No thanks."

"Really.  I mean it.  He's been working out or something."

His eyes held a warning as they locked with hers. 

She ignored it completely.  "Squats I think he said...or maybe it was yoga..."

"I said no thanks."

She shrugged.  "Your loss."

He brushed past her and moved to the living room, chuckling under his breath as he did.  "Hardly."

Pam followed, nearly tripping over his shoes that were now lying right next to hers.  She yawned as she sank on the couch beside him, placing her half empty beer on the end table. 

"I still don't know why you weren't with me on this.  Trust me. You're going to be so much more comfortable in your new chair."

He brought the bottle to his lips and took a long pull.  "I'd be more comfortable if I was able to send sales reports to corporate that were actually legible."

"Hmph.  Legibility is overrated."

"Apparently some people feel that way."

"Yes."  She smiled.  "Some people do."

Jim reached out and ran a hand down the length of her hair, idly twirling a curl around his finger.   "I wasn't just saying it you know.  You do look really pretty today."

"Thanks."  Pam curled up closer to him, tucking one leg underneath her. 

"One might say hot...even."

"Hot huh?"  She raised an eyebrow as she brushed her lips over his.

His hand snaked around to the back of her neck, holding her there when she began to pull away slightly.  "Very."

She smiled as their mouths met again, his lips warm and persistent against her own.  Jim moved to hover above her, his hands sliding to her hips to shift her beneath him. 

"I love watching you, especially when you're determined to get what you want."  His voice was low and gravelly in her ear. 

She settled against the arm of the couch and arched her back slightly.  He let out a small moan in response.   Encouraged Pam's hands trailed along his waist.  "So."  She tugged urgently at his shirttails until they were finally free.   "Can you tell what I want now?"

His lips slowly made their way back towards her own.  "I have an idea." 

"Well...you should know..."  Her fingers hooked through his belt loops tugging him closer still.  "I'm determined to get it."

"Okay then."  He laughed as he pressed a kiss to her temple. 

Pam grinned as she sat upright, her hands sliding up to cradle his face.  She rubbed her fingers against his bottom lip to remove the lipstick lingering there. 

"Here?"

He gave her a look as if he thought she was crazy.  "Seems like as good a place as any."

She reached down and grabbed the hem of her sweater, pulling it up and over her head.  Her hands got caught in the tie at her neck for a moment and she laughed as she felt him helping her.

When he tossed it carelessly to the floor and gazed back at her she smiled.  Her hair was tousled about her face in complete disarray; her lips were slightly swollen from his kisses. 

He ran a thumb under the strap of her bra, causing it to slip down off her shoulder.

"Definitely hot."  He murmured as he kissed her, pushing his hips insistently against hers, encouraging her to lie back on the couch again.

She tugged at his tie, then slid each button of his shirt open.  She pressed her lips against the crook of his neck as he shrugged it off his shoulders.  Her limbs went lax as his hands slipped up and under her skirt.

"Mmm..."

He laughed quietly to himself, knowing from her response she thought this was all so easy.  He knew the way she'd been acting today that she figured she could simply use her various charms to get her way anytime she wanted.  In this instance, unlike earlier at the office, she was actually right.  But still he figured the least he could do was to put up a bit of resistance.

His fingers came to rest high on her thighs, his breath deliciously warm against her ear as he whispered. "Have I told you how much I like having you home?" 

"Uh huh..."  She shifted against him impatiently.

"I do."  He continued.  "It's so nice to spend all day in the office with you...and then...you know...all night.  I really missed that."

"Yeah.  It's great."  She sighed heavily, threading her hands through his hair and tugging none too gently.  

"C'mon..."

His mouth turned up in a wicked grin.  "Oh.  Are you ready now?   I wasn't sure."

"Stop."

"Stop?"  His fingers which had begun to tease her ever so slightly went still once again.

"No...don't...stop."  She groaned in frustration.   "Jim.  Please."

As much as he thought she deserved to be taught a bit of a lesson he realized it was futile.  Resigned that there were, in fact, no losers in this particular situation he finally relented.

"Fine. I'll let you win."  He bent his head again and grinned against her lips.  "But only because you asked so nicely..."

There was something about that party that had made her realize how good it was to be back.  It was sort of comforting to her that she could only always count on this place to not be boring. 

Sitting on the floor, confronting Meredith (which honestly she'd always believed would not have necessarily been a bad thing - just not - you know - at Christmas, maybe) she'd caught his eye and grinned.   When he'd smiled back all she could think was that she'd much rather be curled up next to him someplace else entirely.

Her mind had wandered back to Christmases past.  Sometimes she forgot that there had been a time where he wasn't right there with her.  Sometimes now she forgot about the year he was here yet seemed so far away.  As if to prove something to herself she'd reached out and taken his hand in hers.  She hadn't realized she'd held her breath until he'd given her fingers a squeeze. 

It was good to be back where she belonged.

xoxoxo

It never ceased to amaze him.  These crazy party themes.  Christmas in Morocco?   Whatever happened to mistletoe and holly?

Still it hadn't been all bad.  Michael - it turns out - could make a mean screwdriver.  Even if he didn't know that was actually the name of the drink.

It really didn't matter what the theme was.  The best part about this year was that she was back.  It had been scary there for a bit where he'd been afraid she might not be.  He'd tugged at her hand and she'd inched closer, resting her head against his shoulder, her eyes fluttering closed.  He remembered a time when she'd done that before and how then he'd been afraid to move.  He'd known once he did the moment would be gone forever.   

Not this time though.

xoxoxo

They sat together on the couch the glow of the lights on the small tree in the corner of the room making patterns on the ceiling.

"That was some party huh?"  Jim whispered.  He pressed his lips right below her ear.

"It was."

"So...where do you think it ranked?"

"Hmm."  Pam considered thoughtfully.  "Well the intervention sort of brought the whole thing down.  Plus the whole - Dwight and Angela thing."

"Which you saw coming..."

"Well - I had a feeling something was going on.  But I didn't expect that..."

"I know.   Phyllis must really like planning parties."

"Phyllis really likes getting back at Angela.  And part of me doesn't blame her. Angela was really horrible to her a lot of the time but I don't know.  I don't think she quite deserved that."

Jim was about to weigh in when he heard Pam speak again.  "It must be hard for her.  I know what it's like to be engaged to someone but be in love with someone else..."  She sighed.  "Granted she never had to accept Andy's proposal in the first place but I don't know.  I think she needs to tell Andy and move on.  But somehow I don't think it's going to be that easy."

Silence fell for a moment before Jim replied.  "It never is."

"Nope."  Pam pulled his arms tighter around her and settled in again. 

"So.  Dramatic revelations and co-workers set aflame aside."  He laughed at how ridiculous it all sounded.  "How do you rate this particular party to ones in the past?"

"Definitely not top three..."

"Agreed.  Okay.  So. What are your top three?"

"Last Christmas party was the best...because we spent it together.  Then I'd have to say the year you had me for Secret Santa...then I guess the year I had you..."  Pam turned in his arms and brushed her mouth over his.  "Top three."

"I'd have to agree...except I'll switch the last two."  Jim smiled softly.  "I love that scarf.  Which I think you probably know since I wear it all the time."

"I know."  Pam nodded, her eyes cast towards her lap.  She idly picked at the lint clinging to the blanket covering their legs. 

"What's the matter?"  Jim cradled her face in his hand, his eyes searching hers for a clue as to what she was thinking.  Her mood seemed to change so quickly.

Her cheeks flushed and she shook her head.  "Nothing.  It's stupid."

He shrugged.  "Tell me anyway."

She stared straight into his eyes as she answered.  "It's just...the day you came back?  You were wearing the scarf I gave you and I was so happy.  I thought it was a sign or...something.  I guess because you wore it I was thinking that you hadn't forgotten...that - I don't know.  It was like a sign that I hadn't completely blown it..."

His voice was quiet when he finally replied.  "You hadn't."

"I know that now.  But then?  It totally felt like I had."

Jim nodded.  He understood her perfectly.  "I felt that way...I don't know...hopeful I guess...when you traded the iPod for my gift.  The last thing in the world I wanted was for Dwight to get his hands on..."  He trailed off and swallowed nervously.  "...you know.  The point is I just really wanted you to have it."

"I know.  And I love that teapot.  I use it all the time."  She smiled widely as she turned to face the tree again. 

"Enough about all that."  She sighed as she leaned back against him.  "It doesn't matter.  Because this time next year..."

Jim placed a soft kiss on her hair.  "We'll be in our house..."

She snuggled closer.  "...having our first married Christmas together."

"Wow."  Jim gave a little shiver.  "Married huh?"

"I know I don't have the best track record but you do know that's how this works right?"

"Hmmm?"

Pam fiddled with the ring on her finger.  "You propose...I say yes...we get married.  That's the whole idea."

He snagged her hand and brushed his mouth over her knuckles.  "So it's not just that I buy you an expensive piece of jewelry and you wear it?"

"Well you do and I do but there's a little more to it than that."

"Really?"  Jim pulled her closer.  "I guess I didn't get that memo."

"Do you need me to explain it to you?"

He chuckled and she could hear the smile in his voice when he replied.  "Sure.  Go ahead."

"Okay.  See - we sort of agree that we'll spend the rest of our lives together."

"Ahh.  So that's what all this talk of those vows thing is about..."

"Exactly. And I don't know about you - but I plan to be around a long time."

"Really?"

"Yes.  We're talking years.  Like...decades even."

Jim rolled his eyes.  "Oh alright.  If I have to."

Pam gently elbowed him in the ribs.  "So we agree.  We'll be together till we die."

"A little morbid - but yeah okay.  I agree."

"Speaking of death till we part and all that..."

"Yes?"

"I don't want to be a pain in the ass - but we need to work wedding stuff a bit this weekend."

"You're not at all a pain in the ass."  Jim promised.  His eyes lit up as he added.  "Is it time for me to test out the cake yet?"

She grinned at how excited he sounded.  "Not yet."

"Because it's a job I'm taking very seriously Pam."

"Yeah.  I know.  I think we need to buy stock in Duncan Hines."

"I'm in training.  I've tried lemon chiffon, moved on to devil's food.  Going to try and tackle red velvet next..."

She laughed softly and twisted around, pressing her mouth to his.  She took her time,  lingering over it for a few lovely moments.  As she pulled away she whispered.  "Seems like a natural progression." 

A slow grin spread over Jim's face as she settled against him again.  "What was that for?"

"Nothing." She shrugged.  "I just love that you even know that red velvet cake exists."

"I told you I read that whole wedding book you left here."

"I know you did."

"If you think I'm just going to let you plan this thing by yourself..."

"I don't think that you are and I love you for that."

His arms tightened around her.  "We do need to focus and decide what we want though."

"I know."  Pam sighed heavily.  "There are days though when I don't think I have it in me to do all that again - plus it's not about the wedding anyway..."

"I know..."

She reached for his hand and threaded her fingers through his.  "At this point all I really care about is that in the end we're married."

Jim smiled as he pressed a kiss to her temple.  "Me too."

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity.... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.~ Melodie Beattie

xoxoxo

He glanced at her sideways and sighed.  Her head was resting against the window, her arms crossed, as if she were hugging herself.  It's a posture he knew well.   It's what she did when she was particularly troubled by something.

Jim pulled the car into the driveway and eased it into park.  He turned off the ignition and waited for Pam to stir. 

She didn't.

He knew she was exhausted.  For the past two weeks she'd tossed and turned.  It happened every single night.  Finally, she would creep out of bed.  Despite her best intentions he always woke up.  He could tell instantly that she had moved away from him.   Most nights he didn't follow her.  He'd become an expert in reading her and he now knew when she simply wants to be alone.  In the morning he'd find her back in bed beside him, sleeping soundly.

He had never been good at breakups.   He'd handled his own (including when he left her - that counts as a breakup as far as he's concerned) incredibly badly.  It seemed like in the past his first line of defense was to simply walk away.  It wasn't something he was proud of.  He realized, even then, that it was hardly the best tactic.

Good thing he'll never be breaking up with someone again.

Jim walked over to the passenger side and eased her out of the car, hoping not to wake her.

He neededn't have worried.  She yawned and then settled easily into his arms.

xoxoxo

A few hours later, he was less successful at not disturbing her. 

He clicked the remote on, realizing all at once that Pam must have been the one watching television last.  The volume was set incredibly high.

Still, even with the blaring noise she didn't jump, just murmured a bit.

"Jmm?"

"Shh.  Go back to sleep."  He frantically tried to adjust the control. "I didn't mean to wake you up."

"S'okay."  She sat up and rubbed at her eyes.  "What time is it?"

He glanced at the clock on the cable box.  "A little after eight.   Did you want dinner?  Sorry - I was starving.  But there's more of that spaghetti..."

"No."  She shook her head. 

"It's not a big deal.  I'll heat some up for you..."

'I'm not really hungry." 

Jim's brow furrowed.  She seemed to not have much of an appetite at all these days.  All this stuff with her parents had taken it's toll in more ways that one he guessed.

He sighed, knowing trying to convince her would be futile.  "Okay."

She shifted and pulled at the blanket he'd placed over her earlier.  "Jim?"

"Yep?"

"Could you come here?"

A smile bloomed across his face as he stood and moved towards the couch. "Sure."

She waited for him to lie down then snuggled against his side, arranging the blanket around them both.  Her lips brushed along his jaw as she whispered.  "I love you."

He smiled wider.  "Love you too."

"No.  I'm serious.  Like...a lot."

"Thanks."  He tilted her chin and pressed a kiss to her lips.  "That's comforting."

Her fingers moved to tangle in his hair.  "Thank you for talking to my dad."

"Yeah well it worked out differently than I hoped, but you're welcome."  He kissed her again, lingering over it for a moment.  "Anything for you."

"I know."  She sighed, snuggled closer.  "I promise I'll try not to take too much advantage of that."

"Right."

They lay in silence for a few long moments.  Headlights from a passing car swept across the room.  His fingers trailed up and down her spine.  She became so quiet he thought she had fallen asleep again.

"I still can't believe he got an apartment."

"I know.  It's sort of crazy how quickly..."

Pam's voice became panicked.  "Do you think he's going to start dating?  What if he brings her to our wedding!"

"I'm sure that's the last thing on his mind right now."

"Why?"  She tried to sit up again, almost frantic.  "Did you talk to him about that?"

His arms tightened around her.  "Pam.  You know what I talked to him about."

"But maybe he said something..."

He kissed her again to stop her rambling.  "Look.  I know this thing with your parents is freaking you out.  But you're never going to know everything as much as you might want to.  Honestly all I did was talk to him in generalities.  We didn't go into many details."

"I know."

"Trust me - I got plenty of details just having him walk around here..."

 A horrifying image flashed through Pam's mind.  "Oh my God."

"He might be onto something.   I didn't realize briefs came in so many colors.  Purple?  Really?"

"Please.  Don't."  Pam buried her face in the crook of his neck.  "Let's get back on the subject..."

"Pam.  Your dad was the subject."

"No.  I was just...look what you did - I'm traumatized now.  I don't even know what I was saying."

He brushed his lips against her temple.  "I think you're just suffering from sleep deprivation."

"Probably.  No wait.  I remember now.  I was trying to say thank you."

"You did say thank you."

"I meant it."

"And I believed you.  You're welcome."

He waited a beat, sure she wasn't finished.  As usual his instincts were correct. 

"I hope my mom's really okay.  She said she was - but I think she was just saying that so I wouldn't worry.  I think I'll go to see her this weekend."

"That sounds like a great idea."

"If I do I'll probably stay overnight."

"Makes sense."

"What will you do while I'm gone?"

"Drink a six pack, eat a pizza, hit the strip clubs.  You know, the usual."

"Of course."  Pam laughed.  "But after that what'll you do?"

"I don't know."  He shrugged.  "Haven't had a chance to think about it.  It's supposed to be cold.  I think I'll just hang out here.  Maybe get Mark to help me paint the guest room."

"After the six pack and the pizza of course."

"Of course."

"That sounds like a great idea.  I hated my dad having to stay there the way it looks now.   Oh - but if you guys do that - just make sure you tape around the door..."

Jim rolled his eyes dramatically.  "OK, seriously Miss HGTV.  Enough with the tape."

"Jim.  You have to.  I know you don't believe me but it's important..."

"Pretty sure people painted without tape back in the olden days."

"Yeah and in the olden days their guest rooms looked like crap."

"Whatever.  I predict if I paint this weekend without the benefit of this tape you are so crazy about you won't even be able to tell."

"How much?"

"Huh?"

"How much you wanna bet?"

"Ten bucks."

"Wow.  High roller."

"The economy sucks Pam - I'm being fiscally responsible."

Pam took a deep breath and rested her hand over his heart.  She shifted her head so she could hear it pounding strongly against her ear. 

"Jim?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."  He smiled softly as he asked for clarification.  "What for now?"

Her voice was so quiet he could barely hear her as she went on.  "For saving me from finding out what it would be like.  I could have lived a life just like my parents did."

He didn't quite know what to say to that.  He knew it was true.  While he was trying to figure it out exactly how to respond she filled the silence again.

"Seriously.  I've been thinking about it all afternoon.  That totally could have been me.  I don't know what I'd do..."

He knew that.   He was thankful every day that it wasn't either one of them. There's no chance of that.  Not anymore. 

"Could've been me too.  But it's okay."  He whispered as he ran a hand over her hair.  "We've got nothing to worry about now."

She sat in the wheelchair watching as he signed the charts.  She couldn't focus; all she wanted to do was touch him.  Not sure if she could control herself, she shoved her hands in the pockets of her sweatshirt.  She half listened to the nurse as she handed him the copy of the report.  Something about scheduling an appointment with her own doctor and vitamins.

On that morning a few weeks ago, when he told her with a mouthful of cornflakes that he wanted to marry her, she thought her heart would burst.  The image of three of them huddled around the table in the tiny kitchen flashed before her eyes.  As she heard herself say "Sure" she had been unable to fathom loving him any more than she did in that moment.

Today proved her wrong.

xoxoxo

His hand trembled so violently there was only a illegible line where his signature belonged.  He glanced over towards Pam and could hear the nurse telling her what to do next but it didn't register.  He shook his head, thinking that maybe it was important and he should try harder but there was no use.  He wasn't listening at all. He couldn't tear his eyes away from her.

She was...simply amazing.

As he moved behind the chair her hand shot out and latched onto his.

He stopped, bent down and scooped her up.   She curled her arms around him, laughing as she buried her face against his neck.

It had gotten to the point where he honestly couldn't remember what it was like to not love her.  Now he can't remember a time when he'd loved her more.

xoxoxo

"Just sit."  Jim glanced around, frantically trying to find a place to set her down.  A shady bench stood just to his right and he walked slowly and incredibly carefully towards it.   "Stay right here.  I'll go get the car."

"Wait..."  She grabbed at his sleeve as he began to move away.  "Sit with me.  I..."  She trailed off, her heart in her eyes.  "I don't want to leave yet."

He didn't even hesitate before he settled next to her. He grabbed her hand and laced his fingers with hers.  "Alright."

"Sorry."  She looked up at him, her voice apologetic.  "It's just...my head is still spinning."

Concern filled Jim's face.  "Really?  Do you want me to get the doctor?"  The words were barely out of his mouth before he was already half standing.

"No...no."  She tugged at his hand and made him sit back down.   "Pretty sure this is just a side effect."

He kept staring at her with a dazed and delighted look on his face.  Pam wasn't exactly sure, but she was pretty confident his expression mirrored her own.

"What are you thinking?"

"Right now?"  He lifted her hand and brushed his lips across her knuckles.

"No.  Ten minutes ago."  She rolled her eyes and laughed, giving his fingers a squeeze.  "Or was it the same thing?"

"Similar."  He smiled back at her.  "I keep coming back to - WOW.  Seriously?"

"I know."  Pam giggled. 

"And you had no idea?"

"No.  Not really." She still looked shell shocked.  "Is that weird?"

"I don't know.  Never been p-pregnant myself."  He stumbled over the word, his eyes glittering with a mix of amusement and utter amazement. 

"Stop."  She laughed again.  "I mean - I've been trying to figure it out.  I guess we'll know more when I go to the doctor at home - but I really...I don't think it's been long enough for it to even register to me that I was late."

He smiled wider.  "So when do you think it happened?"

"I can't figure it out.  Like I said, when we go to the doctor at home we'll get a better idea I guess."

"I bet I can narrow it down.  What about that time...you know...the weather was awful.  It was pouring rain...we barely made it home..."

That had been a time when he'd surprised and shocked her.  It had been some day, but still, she knew he was completely off.

"We, in fact, only technically made it home but that was almost a year ago.  Jim, if it had been then I'd have just about had the baby by now.  Nice try though."

She could feel her face break into a grin.  She wondered if she'd ever say the word 'baby' again without smiling like a lunatic.

"I got it."  He looked incredibly pleased with himself.   "Had to be the kitchen."

Her mouth twisted into a smirk as she blushed slightly.  "Which kitchen?"

"Good point."  Unable to resist the look on her face he swooped down and kissed her softly, whispering against her lips as he continued.  "Truthfully?  I was thinking of the one in your apartment."

She pulled back slightly so she could meet his eyes. "Uh huh.  I thought so."  The color in her cheeks deepened at the memory. 

His expression turned even more smug.  "You have to admit it was epic." 

"I admit nothing.  I'm thinking we're sending this kid to private school if this is an indication of what you learned in Sex Ed.  How long do you think it takes to have a baby?"

The sun began to shift, flooding the small bench with warm afternoon light.  Jim squinted against it as he replied.  "Ummmmm.  Nine months?"

"Give or take," she nodded.  "So think more recently..."

He started to laugh.  "Yesterday?  Oh...this morning..."  He wiggled his eyebrows.  "Nice work."

"Less recent than that." She slapped him on the arm. "Seriously.  I'm trying to think.  It had to be after I quit and was working for Michael.  Being up so early every morning - I was exhausted - and now that I think about it I remember I missed a pill in there somewhere."

"Well there you go."

"Yeah but that's happened before and I just double up like you're supposed to after..."  She blew out a breath and shrugged.  "But I guess it was too late."

"Whoops."

"Yeah..."  She ran a hand over his cheek and met his eyes.  He turned his head, his lips brushing over her palm as she repeated.  "Whoops."

Truth was Pam was pretty sure it wasn't any sort of epic occasion, though there were quite a few to choose from.  Maybe it had been the day they had planned to elope but...didn't.  The more she tried to figure it out, the more she was convinced it had probably been just a normal, ordinary day.   She liked that idea.  Her heart beat a little faster at the thought.

She was more surprised that it had happened without her noticing it.  She remembered a time, long before where just the thought of being in this situation made her anxious and panicked.  It seemed like a whole other lifetime to her now.

Pam glanced over at Jim, pulling their joined hands into her lap.  She traced the lines of his palm as she asked, "So.  This is really okay?"

"Are you kidding!?"

"C'mon.  I just know that it's not exactly what we were planning..."

"Yeah well."  She looked so worried it made him laugh.  He cradled her face in his hand, rubbing his thumb along her bottom lip.  "You can relax.  It's not like it's not still awesome."

Her face softened immediately.  She beamed back at him.  "It is pretty great.  Only if I had known...I guess in retrospect we should have gone to Ohio..."

"I don't know.  Maybe.  We can do something closer to home though right?  Don't you think?"  Jim's voice turned serious.  "I know how you feel about the The Village People.  Wouldn't want you to miss out."

"The Village People would be nice.  But it's not a deal breaker."

"Good to know.  I'll call their agent.  See if they're available."

"Thanks."

She could tell he was desperately looking for something to distract himself.  He took a deep breath, exhaled slowly.  His hand was shaking in hers.  He could barely sit still.  It was probably good she'd made him stop and sit with her.  He was not really in any condition to drive.

She held his hand tighter, hoping to calm him a little.  "Seriously though.  I do think we should do it sooner rather than later.

Jim nodded in agreement.  "We should.  Unless we ban the kid from learning math they're going to figure it out eventually."

"Honestly? Deep down I know that but it doesn't seem so important right now."

"No.  It really doesn't."

Her eyes were bright as they met his.  "I just want to marry you."

He held her gaze and swallowed audibly.  "I think I could arrange that."

"Thanks.  I'd appreciate it."

"No problem.  Anything you want, Beesly.  And I do mean anything."

She knew without question that he meant it.  Her head began to spin again, but she wasn't sure if it was the news or the way he was looking at her now. 

They sat in silence for a moment.   Jim shook his head and chuckled.  "My mom is going to freak. out."

"My mom is going to freak out."

His eyes met hers, his voice issuing a challenge. "I don't know. I bet my mom will freak out more than your mom."

"Really Jim?"  She looked at him in disgust.  "You're really going to try and beat me today?"

He laughed loudly as he shifted to pull her close.  She settled against him with a contented sigh.

"No."  He promised as his lips brushed over the top of her head.  "Not a chance."