Special Delivery. 191 x 50 (cm). HOT! Handle with care by Yellowberry22

you know what they say about having a six foot handsome man on your doorstep

Categories: Jim and Pam, Alternate Universe Characters: Jim/Pam
Genres: None
Warnings: Mild sexual content
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 2 Completed: Yes Word count: 924 Read: 1831 Published: November 10, 2022 Updated: November 14, 2022
Story Notes:

It may be short but I hope it’s not underwhelming… THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID

Happy birthday mrsk, thank you for being the internet mom friend that this mom respecter needs. 

Thank you for replacing my usual beta agx and Cheryl :) 

1. Chapter 1 by Yellowberry22

2. Chapter 2 by Yellowberry22

Chapter 1 by Yellowberry22

18:16 Pam Beesly

Do your thing



Penny Beesly 18:18

Pasta shells with broccoli and peas!

This is so different from an uber eats menu 

What are you up to?


18:18 Pam Beesly

Just going for dinner with a friend


Penny Beesly 18:19

A friend? 

Singular?? Not plural?

Man or woman??

Wait no

Platonic or romantic


Penny Beesly 18:27



18:31 Pam Beesly

Sorry! I was just tidying up

It’s just a friend from work…


Penny Beesly 18:31


18:31 Pam Beesly

A man. Romantic.

Don’t start

I hate this


Penny Beesly 18:31


The new job is going well then?


18:32 Pam Beesly

Oh god

Should I cancel? It’s way too soon to start dating a coworker


Penny Beesly 18:32

When are you meeting him?


18:32 Pam Beesly

He’s picking me up at 7


Penny Beesly 18:32

Definitely don’t cancel

Aren’t they all weirdos?

Did you tell a weirdo where you live?


18:33 Pam Beesly

He’s normal don’t worry


Penny Beesly 18:33

Well you can see my confusion. When you said

“they are all weirdos” I assumed you meant “they are all weirdos”


18:34 Pam Beesly

We can talk about this another time

Is this outfit okay?



Penny Beesly 18:34

Lose the cardigan.

Show him your assets

They run in the family


18:36 Pam Beesly

I’m not sure




Penny Beesly 18:36


I change my mind on the food option

You can’t eat garlic when you look good enough to eat


18:37 Pam Beesly

Whatever you’re insinuating, it’s not going to happen


Penny Beesly 18:37

Lolz sure


18:37 Pam Beesly

It’s a first date!

I’ll be home by 11:30


Penny Beesly 18:38

AM or PM?


18:38 Pam Beesly


I’m so nervous


Penny Beesly 18:40

Get the lasagna! Just don’t have garlic bread :)

What does he look like?

I’m expecting some geeky nerdy strange looking dude

Actually thinking about it you’re a perfect match

I’m rooting for you and this dork


18:42 Pam Beesly



Penny Beesly 18:44


He’s FIT

You can’t screw this up

Be on your best behavior

I mean this

No eating your food off the floor


18:44 Pam Beesly

That was one time and I was really hungry!!


Penny Beesly 18:45

I’m sure you’ll be starving even after dinner is over…


18:45 Pam Beesly

I don’t like this conversation

I’ll be back at 11:30, like I said

Brb I need to do some last minute things

Like throw up 


Penny Beesly 18:46

Like adding a condom to your handbag?


18:51 Pam Beesly

What is going on with you?

I don’t like this


Penny Beesly 18:52


I don’t know

I’m really enjoying winding you up

And you know what they say about having a six foot handsome man on your doorstep 


18:52 Pam Beesly

I’m so nervous

Can you stop now

I’m sweating so much


Penny Beesly 18:53

It’s normal to be nervous!

You’re going to have a great time




18:53 Pam Beesly



18:57 Pam Beesly

Oh god he’s here


Penny Beesly 18:57

I want to hear all the gossip when you get back!


18:57 Pam Beesly

You will at 11:30pm.



Penny Beesly 18:58

Have fun!


Penny Beesly 23:31

I’m telling Mom


11:54 Pam Beesly

Please don’t.


End Notes:
Briefly back from hiatus.. aaaand i'm gone again
Chapter 2 by Yellowberry22
Author's Notes:

Thank you for the very unexpected love, I was unsure of this fic but apparently people wanted more?! I love the attention so more you shall get :) And with that said, I bring to you... THE HALPERT FAMILY WHATSAPP GROUP CHAT!


I own nothing but I do have a mom who assumes I'm dead when I don't reply after two seconds.

Halpert Family + Mark

Gerald the Father, Mother, Mistake 1, Mistake 2, Mistake 1’s Wife, Mistake 2’s Wife, Mark, you


14:48 Mother

I have lots of prepared food that needs to be eaten as Paul and family were supposed to be coming over but had to cancel. Would be lovely to have everyone round tonight, we haven’t done a Halpert Friday since Tom’s birthday.


15:03 Mother



15:13 Mistake 1’s Wife

Tom and I will be there. Thank you, Betsy.


15:13 Mother



15:34 Mistake 2

Free food? Hell yeah.


15:34 Mother

Food tastes better when you eat your family… So true

Eat with your family. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Sorry.


15:42 Gerald the Father

Why can’t Paul make it?


15:44 Mother

His daughter has a stomach bug.


15:47 Gerald the Father



16:02 Mother

@Jim Halpert See you tonight?

@Mark Can you find out if Jimmy is coming for dinner please.


16:06 Mark

I’m in New York at the moment, sorry Betsy.


16:06 Mother

Hope you’re having a nice time, Mark. Would you like to come for dinner tonight?


16:08 Mark

I’ll be here all weekend, but thank you for the invite.


16:08 Mother



16:37 Mother



16:53 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert answer your mother. 


16:56 Mistake 2

@Jim Halpert answer Mom you naughty boy


17:02 You

Oh man

I was at work sorry for the late reply.

I would love to come for dinner but I have plans tonight.


17:03 Mother



17:18 You

Sorry Mom, next time <3


17:20 Mother

What are you doing tonight?


17:24 You

Meeting up with friends for basketball and then drinks


17:25 Mother



18:43 Gerald the Father


Raccoon heard about the food.


18:45 Mother



19:13 Mistake 1

On our way.


19:14 Mother

Drive safe.


22:37 You

You deleted a message


22:37 Mother

What did that mean?


22:37 You

Sorry Mom, that wasn’t meant for you guys


22:37 Mother



22:56 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert are you drunk? You are worrying your mother.


23:04 You

No, not drunk. I clicked on the wrong chat by accident.


08:56 Mother

Thank you all for coming last night. @Jim Halpert are you okay? I will bring leftovers for you on my way to Aunt Julia’s. 


10:29 Mother

On my way @Jim Halpert 


10:42 Mother

@Jim Halpert Where are you? No car on the drive.


10:44 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert Answer your phone.


10:46 Mother

@Jim Halpert Left behind the bush.


10:49 Mistake 2

Jimmy missed curfew. Ground him!


10:51 Gerald the Father

Shut up Pete. Your mother is worried.


10:53 Mistake 2’s Wife

Don’t panic Betsy, I bet he stopped on a friend’s sofa as he got back late.


10:55 Mistake 1

Jimmy got some.


10:58 Mother

@Mark Do you know where Jimmy is?


11:12 Mark

No, I’m in New York, sorry.


11:12 Mother

Oh yes, have a nice time.


11:29 Mother

Worried about Jimmy.


11:34 Mistake 2’s Wife



11:52 Mother

Leaving Julia. Will drive by the river, what if he stumbled in there last night?


11:53 You


I don’t go anywhere near the river when I go to basketball Mom


11:54 Mother

Where have you been?


11:55 You replied to Mistake 2’s Wife

“Don’t panic Betsy, I bet he stopped on a friend’s sofa as he got back late.”

— I stopped on Jason’s sofa, had beers at his after Poor Richards


11:58 Gerald the Father

Are you lying to your mother, Jim?


12:00 Mistake 1

Poor Jimmy. Can a guy not have a one night stand without being questioned by his parents? 

Let him do the walk of shame in peace guys.


12:01 Mother


Would she like any leftovers Jim? 


12:03 You

 @Tom Halpert 👎👎👎👎

End Notes:
I'm still on hiatus btw... 
This story archived at http://mtt.just-once.net/fanfiction/viewstory.php?sid=6193