Special Delivery. 191 x 50 (cm). HOT! Handle with care by Yellowberry22
Summary:

you know what they say about having a six foot handsome man on your doorstep


Categories: Jim and Pam, Alternate Universe Characters: Jim/Pam
Genres: None
Warnings: Mild sexual content
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 2 Completed: Yes Word count: 924 Read: 1036 Published: November 10, 2022 Updated: November 14, 2022
Story Notes:

It may be short but I hope it’s not underwhelming… THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID


Happy birthday mrsk, thank you for being the internet mom friend that this mom respecter needs. 


Thank you for replacing my usual beta agx and Cheryl :) 

1. Chapter 1 by Yellowberry22

2. Chapter 2 by Yellowberry22

Chapter 1 by Yellowberry22

18:16 Pam Beesly

Do your thing

sibiosrestaurant.com/dinner/

           

Penny Beesly 18:18

Pasta shells with broccoli and peas!

This is so different from an uber eats menu 

What are you up to?

 

18:18 Pam Beesly

Just going for dinner with a friend

 

Penny Beesly 18:19

A friend? 

Singular?? Not plural?

Man or woman??

Wait no

Platonic or romantic

 

Penny Beesly 18:27

HELLO

 

18:31 Pam Beesly

Sorry! I was just tidying up

It’s just a friend from work…

 

Penny Beesly 18:31

 

18:31 Pam Beesly

A man. Romantic.

Don’t start

I hate this

 

Penny Beesly 18:31

Wow

The new job is going well then?

 

18:32 Pam Beesly

Oh god

Should I cancel? It’s way too soon to start dating a coworker

 

Penny Beesly 18:32

When are you meeting him?

 

18:32 Pam Beesly

He’s picking me up at 7

 

Penny Beesly 18:32

Definitely don’t cancel

Aren’t they all weirdos?

Did you tell a weirdo where you live?

 

18:33 Pam Beesly

He’s normal don’t worry

 

Penny Beesly 18:33

Well you can see my confusion. When you said

“they are all weirdos” I assumed you meant “they are all weirdos”

 

18:34 Pam Beesly

We can talk about this another time

Is this outfit okay?

IMG.6011

 

Penny Beesly 18:34

Lose the cardigan.

Show him your assets

They run in the family

 

18:36 Pam Beesly

I’m not sure

IMG.6012

This?

 

Penny Beesly 18:36

YES

I change my mind on the food option

You can’t eat garlic when you look good enough to eat

 

18:37 Pam Beesly

Whatever you’re insinuating, it’s not going to happen

 

Penny Beesly 18:37

Lolz sure

 

18:37 Pam Beesly

It’s a first date!

I’ll be home by 11:30

 

Penny Beesly 18:38

AM or PM?

 

18:38 Pam Beesly

PM!!!

I’m so nervous

 

Penny Beesly 18:40

Get the lasagna! Just don’t have garlic bread :)

What does he look like?

I’m expecting some geeky nerdy strange looking dude

Actually thinking about it you’re a perfect match

I’m rooting for you and this dork

 

18:42 Pam Beesly

https://www.instagram.com/jim9334/ 

 

Penny Beesly 18:44

OH MY GOD

He’s FIT

You can’t screw this up

Be on your best behavior

I mean this

No eating your food off the floor

 

18:44 Pam Beesly

That was one time and I was really hungry!!

 

Penny Beesly 18:45

I’m sure you’ll be starving even after dinner is over…

 

18:45 Pam Beesly

I don’t like this conversation

I’ll be back at 11:30, like I said

Brb I need to do some last minute things

Like throw up 

 

Penny Beesly 18:46

Like adding a condom to your handbag?

 

18:51 Pam Beesly

What is going on with you?

I don’t like this

 

Penny Beesly 18:52

HAHAHAH

I don’t know

I’m really enjoying winding you up

And you know what they say about having a six foot handsome man on your doorstep 

 

18:52 Pam Beesly

I’m so nervous

Can you stop now

I’m sweating so much

 

Penny Beesly 18:53

It’s normal to be nervous!

You’re going to have a great time

;)

Sorry

 

18:53 Pam Beesly

😐

 

18:57 Pam Beesly

Oh god he’s here

 

Penny Beesly 18:57

I want to hear all the gossip when you get back!

 

18:57 Pam Beesly

You will at 11:30pm.

Goodbye

 

Penny Beesly 18:58

Have fun!

 

Penny Beesly 23:31

I’m telling Mom

 

11:54 Pam Beesly

Please don’t.

 

End Notes:
Briefly back from hiatus.. aaaand i'm gone again
Chapter 2 by Yellowberry22
Author's Notes:

Thank you for the very unexpected love, I was unsure of this fic but apparently people wanted more?! I love the attention so more you shall get :) And with that said, I bring to you... THE HALPERT FAMILY WHATSAPP GROUP CHAT!

 

I own nothing but I do have a mom who assumes I'm dead when I don't reply after two seconds.

Halpert Family + Mark

Gerald the Father, Mother, Mistake 1, Mistake 2, Mistake 1’s Wife, Mistake 2’s Wife, Mark, you

 

14:48 Mother

I have lots of prepared food that needs to be eaten as Paul and family were supposed to be coming over but had to cancel. Would be lovely to have everyone round tonight, we haven’t done a Halpert Friday since Tom’s birthday.

 

15:03 Mother

SCREENSHOT.7142

 

15:13 Mistake 1’s Wife

Tom and I will be there. Thank you, Betsy.

 

15:13 Mother

🤩

 

15:34 Mistake 2

Free food? Hell yeah.

 

15:34 Mother

Food tastes better when you eat your family… So true

Eat with your family. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Sorry.

 

15:42 Gerald the Father

Why can’t Paul make it?

 

15:44 Mother

His daughter has a stomach bug.

 

15:47 Gerald the Father

Shame.

 

16:02 Mother

@Jim Halpert See you tonight?

@Mark Can you find out if Jimmy is coming for dinner please.

 

16:06 Mark

I’m in New York at the moment, sorry Betsy.

 

16:06 Mother

Hope you’re having a nice time, Mark. Would you like to come for dinner tonight?

 

16:08 Mark

I’ll be here all weekend, but thank you for the invite.

 

16:08 Mother

😭

 

16:37 Mother

SCREENSHOT.7143

 

16:53 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert answer your mother. 

 

16:56 Mistake 2

@Jim Halpert answer Mom you naughty boy

 

17:02 You

Oh man

I was at work sorry for the late reply.

I would love to come for dinner but I have plans tonight.

 

17:03 Mother

SCREENSHOT.7144

 

17:18 You

Sorry Mom, next time <3

 

17:20 Mother

What are you doing tonight?

 

17:24 You

Meeting up with friends for basketball and then drinks

 

17:25 Mother

Enjoy.

 

18:43 Gerald the Father

IMG.4267

Raccoon heard about the food.

 

18:45 Mother

🤩

 

19:13 Mistake 1

On our way.

 

19:14 Mother

Drive safe.

 

22:37 You

You deleted a message

 

22:37 Mother

What did that mean?

 

22:37 You

Sorry Mom, that wasn’t meant for you guys

 

22:37 Mother

😕

 

22:56 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert are you drunk? You are worrying your mother.

 

23:04 You

No, not drunk. I clicked on the wrong chat by accident.

 

08:56 Mother

Thank you all for coming last night. @Jim Halpert are you okay? I will bring leftovers for you on my way to Aunt Julia’s. 

 

10:29 Mother

On my way @Jim Halpert 

 

10:42 Mother

@Jim Halpert Where are you? No car on the drive.

 

10:44 Gerald the Father

@Jim Halpert Answer your phone.

 

10:46 Mother

@Jim Halpert Left behind the bush.

 

10:49 Mistake 2

Jimmy missed curfew. Ground him!

 

10:51 Gerald the Father

Shut up Pete. Your mother is worried.

 

10:53 Mistake 2’s Wife

Don’t panic Betsy, I bet he stopped on a friend’s sofa as he got back late.

 

10:55 Mistake 1

Jimmy got some.

 

10:58 Mother

@Mark Do you know where Jimmy is?

 

11:12 Mark

No, I’m in New York, sorry.

 

11:12 Mother

Oh yes, have a nice time.

 

11:29 Mother

Worried about Jimmy.

 

11:34 Mistake 2’s Wife

SCREENSHOT.3295

 

11:52 Mother

Leaving Julia. Will drive by the river, what if he stumbled in there last night?

 

11:53 You

Woah

I don’t go anywhere near the river when I go to basketball Mom

 

11:54 Mother

Where have you been?

 

11:55 You replied to Mistake 2’s Wife

“Don’t panic Betsy, I bet he stopped on a friend’s sofa as he got back late.”

— I stopped on Jason’s sofa, had beers at his after Poor Richards

 

11:58 Gerald the Father

Are you lying to your mother, Jim?

 

12:00 Mistake 1

Poor Jimmy. Can a guy not have a one night stand without being questioned by his parents? 

Let him do the walk of shame in peace guys.

 

12:01 Mother

😳

Would she like any leftovers Jim? 

 

12:03 You

 @Tom Halpert 👎👎👎👎

End Notes:
I'm still on hiatus btw... 
This story archived at http://mtt.just-once.net/fanfiction/viewstory.php?sid=6193