It’s a Monday night, and Jim doesn’t want to be at Super Wal-Mart after the hellish day he had at work.  Really all he wanted to do was to go home, grab a beer, and zone out to sports.  The problem?  He didn’t have anything to eat at home.  Literally nothing.  And beer on an empty stomach really didn’t appeal to him.  So he is now at Super Wal-Mart roaming the aisles aimlessly. 

“Dwight,” Jim says, practically running into him with his cart.  “Hey, man.  That’s, um, a lot of duct tape.  What can you possibly do with all that duct tape?”

Dwight glances over at Jim with scathing disgust.  “Fact: Duct tape is an essential survival tool.”  He pauses, loading a few more rolls of duct tape in to the cart.  “Not that I’d expect you to know that.  You have the survival skills of a gnat.  Although I’d take a gnat’s chances of surviving a bear attack over yours.”

Jim suppresses a smile.  “Gee, thanks, Dwight.  You’re too kind.  So seriously, what are you going to do with all that duct tape?  Plan on getting kinky with your imaginary girlfriend?”

“Duct tape can be used in virtually any situation,” Dwight replies ignoring Jim’s question.  “It can be used as an adhesive, a patch, or a material from which to erect a shelter.  I’ve also heard you can make quite fashionable garments out of various colors.”

“Umm…right.  Good luck with that, man,” Jim nods.  “I’m just going to go finish my shopping.”

Jim turns his cart toward the next aisle when Dwight asks, “Jim…um…how exactly would you go about using duct tape for…with a woman?”

“I can’t believe you are actually asking me that,” Jim chokes, trying to stifle laughter.

Dwight frowns at him.  “I was testing you,” he says, and Jim swears he’s blushing.  “You passed nicely.”

Jim turns around again, chuckling to himself. 

He’s about halfway down the aisle when he remembers something.  He turns around and calls, “Hey, Dwight?”

Dwight looks up from where he’s examining several different color rolls of duct tape.  He doesn’t say anything, just raises his eyebrows in question.

“Umm…don’t use it, the duct tape, with girlfriend, your imaginary girlfriend.  I don’t think she’d appreciate it.”