Toad

Pam glanced at her watch and slumped her shoulders at the fact that only three minutes had passed since she last checked the time. She was a prisoner in Michael’s office taking notes for a meeting between him, Dwight, and Andy. It was supposed to be just Michael and Jim, which would have been tolerable and maybe even fun, but Jim had to go on a last minute sales call. As a result, Michael invited the two men who constantly vied for the number three position in the office. It was a toss-up on which man was causing her headache.

Clod

“I’m sorry. What did you call me?” Jim asked.

Dwight sighed before answering, “Clod. Meaning dolt, stupid—“

“Wow.”

“—dull, awkward—“

“Okay.” Jim replied.

“—blockhead.”

“Why was that necessary?”

“Because, Jim, you don’t use your time as efficiently as a person with your title should. When I was Assistant Regional Manager—“

“Assistant to the Regional Manager,” Jim interjected without thought.

Dwight rose from his desk with a sneer. Jim turned around to share a smile with Pam, but stopped smiling when he realized that Karen witnessed the small exchange. Maybe he was a clod after all.




Pigeon

The camera panned over Jim’s shoulder and zoomed in to show Dwight repeatedly taking a five question, online quiz. It turned its focus back to Jim as he explained what was happening. “Yeah, it wasn’t that hard. My roommate builds webpages for his job, so I had him set up a little IQ quiz. I sent the link to Dwight and told him that I scored one-seventeen and asked if he could do better. Mark rigged it so that no matter what answers you give, your IQ will always be one-fourteen. Dwight’s been taking the test for an hour now.”