She wasn't terribly religious by any means. She had been raised as a Christmas and Easter Protestant. Occasionally, she would offer up a brief prayer, but more out of inertia than anything resembling real belief. Lately, though, she had begun to wonder. She had worked hard to find her strength, and didn't want to share the credit for that with any higher power, but the timing of Jim's epiphany and return to her... well that just seemed divine. For the first time in her life, she had reason to believe that a higher power might be looking out for her. She offered up a short prayer of thanks, and for the first time in her life, actually meant it.

She wasn't terribly religious by any means. She had been raised Catholic, but the crushing nature of that strict faith had pushed her away. Some of the conservatism of her faith had rubbed off on her a bit, but it had never come close to defining her. She liked a good drink as much as the next girl, and used birth control and engaged in pre-marital sex, but avoided casual sex and drinking to excess. She still prayed occasionally, and made it to confession about once a year, but mostly just to cover her bases in case it was all really true. And now she needed God to help her find the strength to forget, to let go, to move on. So she prayed. And she heard nothing. At least nothing loud enough to be heard over the voice in her mind screaming for closure. Screaming for revenge.

*****************

Nine weeks had passed since Jim had dumped her. She had already decided to leave Dunder Mifflin as soon as possible, and she was closing in on a few opportunities, but these things took time. She was waiting to hear from one particularly promising lead from an office supply wholesaler in Connecticut. It would be nice to be close to her parents, after all.

As she watched Pam emerge from the bathroom looking like she'd seen a ghost, Karen was jolted with regret. This was a whole new game. Thousands of times more sinister than the childish pranks that Jim and Pam were used to. A terrible line had been crossed, and there was no turning back now. Karen knew what she needed to do. She had forced herself to get over Jim. He had proven himself to be nothing more than a manipulative, emotionally retarded child: a giant waste of her time. It had hurt and hurt badly, but it was for the better that he had ended it when he did. These days, she mostly ignored him. In contrast, she still carried a dormant, seething resentment toward Pam. Her callous disregard for Karen on the beach could be forgiven, but her proud non-apology in the break room the day after still burned in Karen's mind. Pam had made one attempt to approach her since then, but Karen had bared her claws and lit into her before she could get any words out. That was the last time the two of them had talked. That was over a month ago. Now, she needed this dormant hatred to get through the next few days. She casually made her way to the bathroom. Peeking in the stall, she knew right away. Pam had seen it. A disposable pregnancy test, clearly showing a positive result, sitting atop the toilet paper dispenser, just as Karen had left it.

The next day, she waited until Pam was in the bathroom, and then followed her in. While Pam paused in front of the mirror, Karen raced past her, cut her off, and raced into the stall. Slamming the door behind her, she forced herself to wretch loudly into the toilet bowl for a long minute. After flushing down a load of pristine water, she barreled out, making sure not to make eye contact with Pam. The day after that was her first (and certainly last) Dundee award night. When she wasn't talking with Dwight or Andy, or picking up her "firmest ass" Dundee, she made sure Jim and Pam saw her avoiding all alcohol and drinking only Diet Coke.

A day later, Jim and Pam looked like hell. She could tell they had been up really late, probably arguing or crying. They had obviously put two and two together. Jim spent the whole day trying to corner Karen to talk in private, but she refused to budge from her desk. The next day he and Pam looked even worse. They'd definitely had a fight or something, and neither of them looked like they had slept a wink. It was time to finish the gambit. Karen waited until Pam was alone in the break room, and moved in.

"Listen, Pam..." Pam looked up at her with a weariness that looked all too familiar.

"About this pregnancy thing... I'm not sorry I did it, but I'm sorry if it made you feel weird."

Before a stunned Pam could summon a response, Karen pulled out the glass whiskey bottle she's been hiding in her pocket and proceeded to inhale almost half of the dark-orange liquid in one shot. She gave Pam a little wink as she turned and left.


*****************

She had made her way all the way to the roof before she stopped and sat down. She had done it.

Karen opened her liquor bottle and downed the rest of the apple juice that she had placed in there that morning. In all the emotional turmoil that she was undergoing, she had carelessly left the pregnancy test kit in the bathroom, where Pam had seen it. She had never meant for Pam to see it... in fact that was the last person she wanted to know. So she reacted quickly. She cooked up an ostensibly fake pregnancy and bashed Jim and Pam with it a few times, throwing them completely off the scent in the process. Her prayers had been answered. The man upstairs had given her something so sacred that it had silenced her petty thoughts of revenge instantly.

Jim wasn't hers. He never was. He had no reason to know, because if he did, he might try to force his way back into her life. He belonged with Pam. Only the guise of ruthless payback could have freed them from the suspicion that would have undoubtedly festered, slowly poisoning their bond. Faced with that uncertainty, Jim would have tried to track her down to be sure, and God forbid he may have found out the truth one day, maybe a year from now, maybe five. This way he would be glad to be rid of her. He'd never track her down. He and Pam could enjoy their happy ending. Karen had given them back their future. They'd never know the truth.

After a very emotional few minutes on the phone with her mother, the question finally came up.

"That's the thing, Mom... he shipped off to Iraq and was killed before I ever found out." She smiled with relief as her mother bought the last lie that needed telling, and the conversation turned to more pleasant things.

"Yeah...he was tall. Very tall. And good looking too..."