He thought that he had their entire lives together. That by some miracle they would exit this world in each other’s arms at a ripe old age. He didn’t expect to have to say farewell to his true love only a mere twelve years after they shared martial vows.

“Daddy?” A small hand rested on his shoulder. Jim turned to his beautiful ten year old daughter. Her curly auburn hair gently blew in the fall wind. He stared into her hazel eyes. The same color eyes that he glanced into at the reception desk all those years. “It’s getting cold, Daddy.”

Jim brushed his lips over Lilly’s forehead before standing up from his chair. Most of the guests were already down the hill and only Jim and Lilly remained by Pam’s open grave. They both approached closer, grasping the other’s hand tightly. Lilly tossed a rose into the ground where it softly landed on the maple coffin.

Jim wrapped his arms around his daughter as tears started to stream down her cheeks. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and said his good-bye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Knock, knock. Jimbo?” Jim glanced up from his paperwork to see his old friend. It’s been over three years since Pam’s death and while he never stopped thinking about her, the days have gotten gradually easier. Being back in Scranton definitely made the change more comforting. Especially with old faces he thought he never would see again.

“Come on in, Michael,” Jim said as he made his way to give the older man a hug. Michael hadn’t changed too much since leaving Dunder Mifflin about five years ago. There will always be the little gleam in his eyes and the sparkle in his smile. Jim offered Michael a chair. “So, what brings you here?”

“Just wanted to check in on you. And of course, Lilly.” Michael subconsciously picked up a frame off of Jim’s desk; it was of Pam. Michael sighed as he traced the outline of her face. “She’s so beautiful.”

Jim couldn’t help but smile. “Indeed. Lilly’s becoming a spitting image of her, too.” He took another frame and handed it to Michael. “I’m afraid I’ll be shooing off boys soon.”

Michael looked up at Jim. “Just don’t tell Dwight that. He might do something stupid.” Jim laughed as he imagined Dwight in his farmer outfit chasing after teenage boys with a spud gun. While Dwight and Jim never saw eye-to-eye when they were working together, Dwight became one of Jim’s closest friends when Pam became ill. Before she died, Pam made Dwight promise to look after Lilly just as he had looked after her; Dwight never backed down from that vow. He would watch Lilly when Jim had to go on business trips. He would let her play on the farm with her friends. And he even let her drive in his old Trans Am, without Jim’s knowledge, of course. Dwight became the uncle that Jim’s brothers never were.

Placing the frames back on the desk, Michael stood up. “You free to have lunch now?” Jim nodded with a grin.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once a week, Lilly would go through a scrapbook that her mother made.  Soon after Pam learned that her cancer was terminal, she started collecting pictures and created scrapbooks. There were seven completed ones with two unfinished.  Lilly enjoyed the Dunder Mifflin ones the most, since that was where her parents met. It seemed like an unlikely place to find your soul mate, but it worked for them, even with all the trials and bumps they had along the way.

“Lilly, did you finish your homework?” Jim called from the kitchen.

“Yes, Dad.” Lilly was a straight-A student, an avid soccer player, and talented pianist. She seemed to be the perfect combination of both her parents. She had her father’s athletic ability and her mother’s creative touch. And while she looked a lot like Pam, Lilly inherited Jim’s personality and sense of humor.

“Dinner in ten.”

“What are we having?”

“Um… It’s a new recipe that Holly gave me.”

Lilly made a face. Holly, Michael’s wife, was a nice woman and Lilly liked her a lot but she had given Jim some interesting recipes before, all organic, healthy kinds; Lilly had to investigate. She quickly put away the scrapbook and went into the kitchen. A foul smell suddenly hit her. “Dad, what is that?” she asked while fanning the stench from her face.

Jim looked nervously to his daughter. “It’s tamarind.” As soon as Lilly raised her eyebrow, he added quickly, “And eggs, anchovies, and coconut milk.”

Lilly grabbed the phone, “I’m calling in pizza.” As she walked away, she yelled back, “Would Alfredo's Pizza Café work?”

Jim looked at the skillet in front of him. “Why the hell did I make this?” he muttered to himself before answering Lilly. “Make it a large with pepperoni and mushrooms.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Five years ago, Jim, Pam, and Lilly were living in an 1897 townhouse in the Old City neighborhood of Philadelphia. Jim was an executive of a marketing firm that was just starting when the Halperts moved to Philadelphia eight years previously. Pam worked as an art curator at an independent gallery in the Museum District. After their years at Dunder Mifflin, they managed to finally get to their dream jobs and making a good amount of money to have a life they always wanted. They were able to provide good schooling for their daughter and managed a good size living even for the middle of the city.

Then, of course, the dream was shattered when Pam collapsed during one of Lilly’s soccer games. It was a seizure that was brought on by a brain tumor. Due to the location of the tumor, surgery was not an option without severe complications. Pam did radiation and chemotherapy; while it worked for a while, she become unresponsive to the treatments. Finally, she told them to stop. She was getting weaker and weaker with each treatment and she rather face her destiny straight on; the doctors’ verdict was three to four months.

Pam wanted to move back to Scranton for her last few months, so Jim granted her that wish. He took a leave of absence from his job, planning in the back of his mind that he would never actually return, and bought a house in Scranton. Lilly had her summer break when they moved, knowing that she would not be attending St. Mary’s again. She was a little more than a year old when she and her parents moved from Scranton, but they always returned to visit her grandparents and other family members, not to mention friends from her parents’ old work. So, coming back to Scranton was second nature to the Halperts.

Jim stared up at the ceiling. It was 3:42 in the morning and he just couldn’t go back to sleep. Every once in a while he’d have a night like this. Just a time to think. To remember. Jim sighed as he grabbed his cell phone off the nightstand. He dialed his voicemail and listened to the first saved message.

“Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam. Yeah, it’s been a while. Anyways, Jim, there’s no more toilet paper. Would you buy some on the way home? Thanks. I love you.”

Beep. The second saved message.

“Okay, Jim, funny story. Michael and Holly came by today and they brought these cookies. Smelled really good. Looked really good. Lilly took one bite of them and literally spit it right in Michael’s face. Apparently, they’re vegetable cookies. Yeah… you gotta try one when you get home. Miss you.”

Beep. The third saved message.

“Jim. My wonderful and amazing husband, Jim. My best friend and my partner-in-crime. I love you. I love you for everything that you’ve done for me. Not just now but even all those years ago. You always believed in me and encouraged me. Always put me first. Thank you for that. Thank you for letting me succeed and letting me fail. I am a better and stronger person for having you in my life. You have given me the most beautiful gift in Lilly. You’ll do fine. I love you. I’ll always be your Beesly. “

Beep.

“There are no more saved messages.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lilly’s fifteenth birthday was that weekend. Of course, she was going to have it at the same place she had it for the last four years: Schrute Farm. Jim didn’t know why exactly she kept wanting to have it there but he wasn’t going to question it. Dwight pulled out all the stops plus with Angela’s help, each year got better and better.

As a tradition on all the birthdays, Jim and Lilly spent the night before heading back into town. The irrigation room was all theirs and Jim always told Lilly the story of his and Pam’s adventure on Schrute Farm. Lilly loved hearing the stories, but they were always told from her dad’s perspective. While her mother was alive, Lilly was too young to care or even understand her parents’ love story. But now as she had gotten older, she wanted to know more.

She would ask her dad constantly but she knew that it would be difficult for him to relive those moments too many times. She got bits and pieces from Dwight, Angela, Michael, and other co-workers. But she still had questions.

When Jim and Lilly got home, Lilly proceeded into her bedroom and went through her presents again. Dwight had given her a carved wooden figurine of a woman. It was an abstract carving but Lilly had a feeling that it was suppose to be her mother. Angela gave a sweater with cat buttons. Michael and Holly gave a gift card to the mall, which seemed more like Holly’s idea than Michael’s.

A wrapped box caught Lilly’s eye. She picked it up and saw the card attached to it; “My Dear Lilly” was written on the front, in her mother’s handwriting. She paused and stared curiously at the box. It was heavy and about the size of two shoe boxes stacked on top of each other. With another moment of hesitation, she gently opened the card and read the inside:

Hi, my sweet daughter,

Happy 15th Birthday, Lilly!

You’re so grown up now. I know that I’m not there with you, physically, but rest assure, I am watching you and I’m so proud of the young woman that you’ve become. Daddy’s going to have to start beating boys off with sticks soon. Him or your Uncle Dwight.

I told your dad to give this to you today, but he doesn’t know what’s inside. I wish that I could be there and talk to you. I hope that this present will help.

I love you, Lilly. Give Daddy a kiss for me, okay?

Mom

Lilly wiped away the tears and put the card back in its envelope. Unlike the rest of her presents, she unwrapped this one carefully, trying to no rip the paper too much. When all the wrapping was off, she ran her fingers slowly over the cover of the box in hands. She envisioned her mother on her bed or on the sofa, tucking away a present she knew she would never see opened. Lilly let out a deep breath and open the lid. Inside was a journal and about a dozen DVD cases. A sticky note was attached to the top case:

When Daddy and I were at Dunder Mifflin, we were part of a documentary.  This is the whole piece.

Jim never mentioned the documentary to Lilly. Dwight never did either. Or Michael. Angela. Holly. Kevin. Andy. Toby. Phyllis. No one. Lilly picked up the journal. Another sticky note was hidden inside the front cover:

I started this journal after your dad transferred to Stamford. I completed it when we moved to Philly. I hope that it brings some answers to questions that you might have.

Lilly flipped to the first entry.

Jim transferred. I didn’t even realize it because I couldn’t really look him in the eye after what happened. I should have said something or done something. Now, he’s gone. I probably won’t see him again. I’m marrying Roy. I am marrying Roy.

But I don’t love Roy. I think I love Jim.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Jim looked over the contract again. He didn’t like the second to the last clause about the residual payments after 30 day mark.

“Dad.” Jim looked up to see Lilly standing in the doorway, her eyes all red and puffy.

“Lilly, what’s wrong?” He asked urgently. Lilly walked closer to him and gave him a kiss on the forehead. He looked into her eyes as he tucked away strains of hair behind her ear. “What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

“Nothing’s the matter. That kiss was from Mom.” Lilly sat herself down next to her dad’s desk.

Jim gave a sad smile. “For years, I’ve been wondering what was in that box.” He took a hold of Lilly’s hand. “You okay?”

Lilly nodded. “Mom left me a journal and the documentary.” As Lilly noticed her dad’s eyes get bigger, she smiled. “Yup. Mom gave me the documentary.”

It took a while before Jim found his voice. “I didn’t even think copies existed.”

“I think she asked for it directly from the documentary company. They seemed pretty official looking.”

“Wait.. you watched them already?”

“Just the first disc.” Lilly chuckled. “I can’t believe that you actually taped Dwight into a cardboard box.”

Jim laughed as he patted Lilly’s hand. “Dwight was very willing to get in. Just as he was willing to bleach his hair, too.”

“Terrible look.” Lilly stood up and gave Jim a hug. “You loved Mom so much. Even when she was still engaged.”

“Was it that obvious?”

“Pretty much, Dad.”

Jim smiled. “She brought me so much joy and happiness. Just like you.”

“Thanks, Daddy.” Lilly gave her father another kiss. “I’m going to bed, but tomorrow, do you want to watch part of the documentary with me?”

“I would love to. Especially if it means seeing Michael in all his glory.”

“That was pretty silly with the health care plans.”

“Wait until you see him fight Dwight in karate, get everyone in the office drunk, grill his foot, and believe that he got stoned off of a clover cigarette.” Jim looked at Lilly and added, “Pretty much it’s a guideline on how not to act.”

Lilly grinned. “So, no fighting, no drinking, no grilling, and no drugs.”

“I knew that you were a smart girl.”

“I was taught well, Dad.” Lilly turned on her heels and walked out of the room.

Jim watched her and slowly went back to the paperwork on his desk. He gradually glanced at the picture frame in front of him. “I love you, too, Beesly.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~