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Story Notes:
This is just an inner monologue with Jim that I've been thinking about for a while. It was going to be a single chapter, but I liked the idea of breaking it up. So just a couple short chapters, nothing too complicated for my first fic...

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Author's Chapter Notes:
This chapter's title is pretty self explanitory :)
"Thanks, Jim. See you tomorrow."

"Yeah. 'Night Karen."

Jim hung up the phone and wearily glanced at the clock. 1:18 AM. If he was forced to go through one more of these "talks" and make some more "progress" on his relationship with Karen, he would just have to throw himself in front of a train. This was worse than the idea of having a career selling paper.

"This is something Pam would never do to me," he thought before quickly pushing the idea out of his head.

What was being accomplished by these late-night discussions anyway? Besides a headache and some sort of frustration he couldn't place, he couldn't think of anything. He lied most of the time... No I don't have feelings for her... Yes I've moved on... and even though he never directly said it... It's totally okay that you are overly controlling and trying to completely change my personality- nope no problem with that at all.

But he went along with it, because this was the plan. Change everything and move on from last May. New city, new apartment, shorter hair, different wardrobe. Grape soda with ham and cheese was replaced with bottled water and tuna. No more silly pranks on Dwight with Pam (well... there were exceptions to that one). He was "evolving" as he put it. It didn't matter that he was actually lying to himself, because it dulled the searing pain to a manageable ache. And maybe, if it stopped searing for long enough, it would never flare up again. But lately, the ache wasn't dull and it wouldn't go away.

Jim came to the realization that things had gone too far.

Pam was the reason behind his frustration because thinking of her made life simultaneously complicated and simple. It was complicated because she still hadn't made her feelings clear, there was Karen to consider, and he hadn't really talked to Pam in a long time. Simply put, however, Jim was still in love with her. That part wouldn't be changing anytime soon.



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Chapter End Notes:
What will Jim realize next?

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