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Story Notes:
I've had this one kicking around for a couple of months. I'm posting it now to (a) celebrate Valentine's day and (b) to cheer myself up-life at home has been tough recently, so I needed something light.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Chapter Notes:
This is the first story/chapter I have sent in with my trusty beta, Vamperic Blood. I hope it is not too bad. I just really wanted to get this started on Valentine's Day, and, with my wife away, needed something to distract me.
Chapter One

I was basking in the sunshine on what we jokingly call the “Leto Deck” when the waiter appeared with a phone. “Call for you sir” he said with the utmost seriousness.

I proceeded to ignore him. Calls on vacation are never good. Never. No one ever calls and says “would you like two more weeks off?” or “how about a better room?” No, calls on vacation are always bad news, and in my line of work they are REALLY bad news. It was better before we had phones-at least with telegrams you could try to avoid them….

Two minutes later my company cell phone buzzed. I hesitated for a second before looking at the caller ID. I knew perfectly well who it was, as only two people have that number and one of them is me. The other is the Chief (yes, THE Chief).

“Yeah?” I said, trying to sound as aggravated as I felt. It didn’t matter; the Chief could always ignore my moods. He hasn’t been doing this job for something like 6000 years (plus or minus a century or two) without developing a thick skin. And don’t even think that the paintings and statues resemble him in the slightest-he looks NOTHING like a cheery little cherub (and he does not act that way, either).

“Enjoying your vacation?” came the Chief’s voice, rough and no nonsense as always. “Well, if you are, then… tough. I need you back here.”

“This better be important” I growled. “I have 10 more days off coming to me and I’ll be damned if I’m coming in for anything routine”

“Interesting choice of words” chuckled the Chief. “How does a URL (unrequited love) with a 9.8 intensity index sound to you?”

“Wow!”, I said, with a low whistle. “But why me-why can’t someone else handle…?”

“Do you think I interrupted your vacation without trying someone else? Give me more credit than that. Two other agents have already gone in and both failed… badly I might add. The situation is now even worse than when they started and this is starting to be embarrassing”

“Who did you send?” I asked, stalling for time and trying to get my head around this. No one in our group had seen a URL with a rating better than 8.5 in better than 60 years, maybe more. I think Bogie and Bacall were the last, or maybe Tracey and Hepburn?

“Paulson first, then Johnson” replied the Chief, breaking my concentration. “Both bombed and I’m not sure how or why. Time for me to send in the big guns-you.”

This is bad I thought to myself, really bad. Paulson was a hack, but Johnson was good, very good. Maybe even as good as me. If he failed, this was pretty serious stuff.

“Ok, you got my attention. Who is the assignment?” I asked.

The Chief shuffled some papers: “Uh, the names are Pamela Beasley and James Halpert. They work in a small company office in Scranton Pennsylvania. Get in here now” he said and hung up.

I started moving. By the time I got to the door, I was running.
Chapter End Notes:
I have the next couple of chapter almost ready, but want to get feedback first. Hopefully, this is not too confusing.


Labhub is the author of 3 other stories.



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