Michael Gary Scott is insane.

It’s not new news; Jim knew this the moment he stepped into Michael’s office for his interview and Michael proceeded to impersonate Elvis for the next ten minutes (and then Kermit for the next five. Badly). It’s been seven years and Jim still wonders why he decided to accept the job (really, he knows he accepted it because Michael was the only one willing to give the kid right out of college a chance). Especially after days like today, when Michael decides that a productive day in the office is equivalent to a day in prison and forces everyone to join him in a game of four-square. Jim had just gotten back from three different sales meetings with clients and was looking forward to finally sitting down at his desk when Michael made the announcement to meet him outside. Days like today lead him to Poor Richard’s as soon as the clock strikes five.

He’s on his second beer, leaning back against the booth as he watches everyone else in the bar. There’s a couple making out in the corner, a group of guys yelling at one of the TVs near the counter, a couple of kids, who Jim isn’t even sure are old enough to be in here, are playing the weirdest songs they can find on the jukebox. The bar is loud and crowded considering it’s only a Thursday night; he watches people dancing on one side of the bar and flirting on the other. He thinks he should leave soon before people start thinking he’s pathetic being here by himself.

He takes another swig of beer before his eyes fall onto someone walking into the bar. Their eyes meet for half a second before she gets lost in the crowd and he turns to watch the couple next to him fight about the bill and then to the guy across the room playing darts. He lets himself continue to glimpse into various patrons’ lives as he sips his beer, the kids still on the jukebox, a girl playing pool, two guys helping a third stumble out the door. He lifts the bottle to his lips before realizing it’s empty, and even though he knows he probably shouldn’t, he does have work tomorrow, he goes up to the bar to order another.

Before he can wave the bartender over, he hears an irritated, “No, thanks,” and glances to his right. His mother would probably scold him with how often he tends to eavesdrop, but that doesn’t stop him from doing it anyway. He had to be observant in order to survive his two older brothers and the trait followed him to adulthood. Plus, if he was honest, he liked being able to find things out about strangers he would likely never see again. Learning secrets, finding out information, listening to arguments. There was nothing he could do with the stuff he heard, but he enjoyed knowing that the people surrounding him had their own lives just like he did.

Which is why he glances over. Just to gather information. The voice had come from a girl sitting two stools away, chin in her hand, a small frown on her face. He can’t see her whole face from where he is, but he can see part of the crease in her forehead and watches her pick at the sleeve of her cardigan. He looks above her to see Roy Anderson practically hovering over the girl. He doesn’t know a lot about Roy, except for the fact that he’s a frequent visitor of Poor Richard’s and usually coerces some girl into leaving with him for the night. It seems like he has found his target, though she couldn’t seem more uncomfortable if she tried.

Roy isn’t backing off, though, clearly not reading the signs that she is uninterested. Jim isn’t one for confrontation, but he feels bad for the girl. Any other time he had seen Roy do this, if the girl wasn’t interested, she told him so. By the way this girl keeps looking down, playing with her fingers, and picking at her sleeve, Jim can tell she isn’t that bold.

He’s not sure what he’s going to be able to do, though. He doesn’t necessarily peg Roy as the violent type, but Jim knows that he would lose in a fight if Roy decided to start one. And with how insistent he seems to be on charming this poor girl, Jim isn’t sure Roy would simply turn away with a simple, “back off.” He tries to come up with a plan but then watches her noticeably stiffen as Roy slides his hand across her back and Jim finds himself walking towards her with no clue of what’s going to happen once he reaches them.

“Dammit, there you are. We’ve been looking for you, I thought we were meeting at the back booth?” The words come out a little quicker than he would have liked, but he hopes he still sounds convincing enough. They look at each other as Jim steps next to Roy and he recognizes her as the girl who he had noticed walking into the bar earlier. He had the passing thought earlier that she was pretty but was quickly distracted and had forgotten that he had even seen her. Now that he’s closer, he can see how green her eyes are, the lightest spread of freckles on her cheeks, how her curls frame her face perfectly.

She seems to not recognize him though, her frown changing slightly from uncomfortable to confused. He doesn’t blame her for not immediately playing along with his idea, considering he isn’t entirely sure what his idea is either. But Roy’s hand is off of her back now, so he continues talking, hoping she’ll get the hint. He nods towards the door, “The rest of the group left but I was going to hang out for a little longer, what are you drinking?”

“Um, just a beer.”

“Can I sit with you? Unless…” He looks at Roy for the first time since he walked over here, looking more confused than she is, before looking back at her.

Realization seems to hit her then, and she gestures towards the stool next to her. “No, no. Go ahead, please.”

“You know her, Halpert?”

That catches Jim off guard, since he doesn’t really know Roy, he’s not sure how Roy knows him. Jim wonders if maybe he spends a little too much time here as well. He tries to recover, waving his hand, “Oh, yeah. We’ve been friends for years, right?”

She nods, a little too quickly to really be natural, but luckily Roy doesn’t seem to notice. “Yeah, yes. Years.”

Roy squints, trying to figure out the bluff, but Jim just shrugs, hoping Roy will see he’s not winning and will leave. He doesn’t, though, and instead gets a little smirk. “What’s her name?”

“What?”

“Her name. Easy question for such good friends.”

“Why do you care?” He could have said any name, gotten the question over with, but he feels Pam’s finger on his back, making letters against his shirt. He’s trying to buy time so he can figure out what she’s spelling. P-A-

“Why won’t you answer the damn question?”

“It’s Pam, okay?”

Roy glances at Pam and Jim can see her nodding out of the corner of his eye. Roy looks back at him, “Birthday?”

“Hers or mine?” He can already feel her finger on his back again, M-A-

“Why the hell would I want to know your birthday?”

R-C-H, Jim shrugs, “It’s coming up, thought you’d want to buy me something.”

“When is her birthday, Halpert?”

“March 25th.”

“What’s her mom’s name?”

H-E, “Am I on a game show? What the hell does this have to do with me being friends with her?”

“Just checking your story. Don’t want this pretty lady to be stuck with some creep, right?” Jim has to hold back his laughter at the irony as Roy continues, “Come on, you’ve been friends for years, right? You have to know her mom’s name.”

L-E-N-, “Helen, okay? Did we pass? Can I drink now?”

Roy glares at them both, “How do I know you’re not just lying?”

“Here,” Pam digs through her purse and pulls her wallet out. She flashes her license and confirms the first two answers, “Sorry I can’t prove my mom’s name.”

Roy gives a pouty hmph and stalks off.

They both release a quiet but relieved sigh, grinning at each other afterwards. Jim realizes that although his smile is genuine, he’s glad that they got Roy to leave, he’s also a little sad that the questions are over, already missing the feel of Pam’s touch. Which is weird, considering they don’t actually know each other.

She pulls him out of her thoughts, pushing her hair back behind her ear and then smiles, “Thanks for that. I tried asking him to leave, but he wouldn’t. I even tried telling him that I have a boyfriend,” she chuckles, starting to pick at her beer label, “Then I was going to leave myself, but he seemed really insistent. I was afraid he would just follow me.”

He’s glad she was looking down so she couldn’t see the look of disappointment he could feel on his face at the mention of a boyfriend. She looks back up at him when he doesn’t respond, though, so he clears his throat and waves his hand nonchalantly, “No problem. Uh, that whole spelling thing was really smart, I almost panicked and called you Rhonda. I don’t know where that came from, but it was the only name I could think of.”

She laughs, “Definitely not Rhonda.”

They’re interrupted by the bartender asking if they need anything. Jim orders another beer, Pam is only halfway through hers, so she passes. The bartender grabs a Guinness and passes it to Jim before going off to the next pair.

Jim takes a sip of his drink before saying, “I’m Jim, by the way. Birthday is October first and my mom’s name is Betsy.”

She nods, the smile still having not left her face, “My mom’s name is actually Helene. Luckily they don’t put that on licenses.”

He chuckles, “Roy is a creep. I’m surprised you haven’t run into him before, do you not come here often?”

“I actually just moved here a couple of weeks ago. Finally landed a job and thought I’d go out to celebrate a little.”

“Oh, that’s great! I can leave, if you want? I’m sure getting hit on by some dude and then hanging out with a stranger wasn’t in your plans for celebrating.”

She smiles, “No, it wasn’t. But, um, it’s okay. You—”

“Jim!”

They both look over to whoever is calling his name and he sees Katy across the room, waving at him. He hadn’t seen her in a few years, since she had moved back home with her parents. They had grown up together, though, so he was pretty upset when she left. Work and hobbies had gotten in the way, so they haven’t talked in a little over a year. He grins and waves back, then turns back to Pam. “I’m so sorry, do you mind?”

“Yeah, no, no worries. Take your time.”

“Okay, I’ll be back. One minute.”

He grabs his beer and makes his way across the room, greeting and hugging Katy once he gets close enough. He says hi to her friends as well as he sits down next to her to catch up for a moment, not realizing that she’s inching closer as he tells her stories about work. He’s in the middle of telling her about today’s four-square outing when her hand slides onto his knee and he stops.

He’s not sure if she wasn’t listening to him talk or just doesn’t care that he stopped in the middle of a sentence as she says, “We were gonna go down to The Bog, they’re having a ladies’ night over there. Did you want to come with me?”

“Oh, um, I can’t. I was—”

He looks back towards the bar but doesn’t see Pam anymore. He looks around the room, trying to find her, but he doesn’t see her anywhere. He quickly checks his watch and frowns a little. He had only been gone about three minutes, but she’s disappeared.

“Um,” he turns back to Katy, “Yeah, I’ll come along. Sounds like fun.”

“Great! Let’s go!”

He looks around once more before walking out of the door, but she’s still nowhere to be seen. The door closes behind him, Katy is pulling him forward, her hand on his back. It’s a nice gesture, anyone walking by would think he’s lucky to have Katy by his side. He’d also be lying if he said he wasn’t glad to be able to hang out with her again; they were best friends growing up. But even with her hand pressing against him, he can still only feel the warmth that Pam’s brought as she spelled out her name.

But Pam has a boyfriend, anyway, so he’ll try to forget about her fingers tracing his back.