The sound of the low gas light shook her from her thoughts. She'd almost forgotten Michael was taking up space in her backseat. Almost.
"You need gas. We better stop."
"Michael." It was not a name. It was a warning.
"Yep." He quieted down.
This was not how she thought her night would end. She had a lot of plans for this Friday night, but driving Michael home after he tried to kiss her was not one of them. She was furious with him, but she knew the anger wouldn't last. She wouldn't go to Toby with it. She wouldn't even be worried to be alone with him in the future. Michael was not a predator, he was a child, and it was the only reason Pam didn't hate him. Pam would have almost expected to have turned her head and seen a pimpled 12 year old boy facing her with braces and bad breath.
She shouldn't have gone to the Diwali festival. She should have just stayed home. She only went because she knew if she stayed home by herself she would be depressed that she was spending another Friday night alone. Pam had hoped to spend this night with someone else.
She and Jim had been talking on the phone, texting and emailing for almost two weeks. She had hoped tonight would be the first time they could see each other again in person. It was her own fault, though, she shouldn't have let herself get so excited over the idea without making sure he didn't already have plans.
It had started with his accidental phone call. Jim was trying to get Kevin's extension but she had answered the phone. Two hours later they said goodbye, and even though their salutation had been awkward, she felt happier than she had in a long time. That evening she went home and replayed every part of their conversation in her head. She dreamed about him that night, and when she woke up the next morning, the first thing she thought was how to get him on the phone again.
He had asked her to fax him the itinerary Jan was making her keep on Michael. At 9:00a.m. that morning she photocopied the list and tucked it away under some papers. At 11:00a.m. she pulled the paper back out, and while butterflies squirmed her stomach she carefully wrote at the bottom of the page.
If you are bored later give me a call:
(Home) 555-358-3245
Do you still have my cell? Just in case:
(Cell) 555-983-4785
She waited until 2:00p.m. to fax it with a Dunder Mifflin cover letter that stated 'Attn: Jim Halpert'. It was late enough so he wouldn't think it was the first thing she thought of when she woke up. Her heart raced and the back of her neck felt sweaty as she watched the delicate paper feed through the machine. When the beep let her know it was done, she crumpled the paper up and threw it in her trash can. Pam hoped no one could tell she was blushing.
An hour later she regretting sending the fax. What if someone else picked it up? What if it was some gorgeous blonde asked him who was giving him their number? What if Jim simply said, "Oh, it's no one."
Two hours later she decided she felt alright that she had sent the fax. He seemed happy to talk to her the night before. He had once, just months ago, told her he was in love with her. Of course he wanted to talk to her, right?
By 5:00p.m. she gathered her things together and dreaded the idea that maybe he wouldn't call. Maybe he couldn't be friends with her anymore. But Pam didn't think she wanted to be friends anymore either. Maybe she should have been bolder when she wrote the message. Maybe she should have written, 'I had an amazing time talking to you last night, I would like another chance.', but then her mind went back to the imaginary gorgeous blonde who liked to hover over the fax machine.
At 7:23p.m. her phone rang and she stopped worrying.
"Turn right on Bedford."
"I know where you live, Michael." Pam turned on the radio.
That second phone call turned into an almost nightly event. They took turns calling, always having some sort of question to ask or story to tell as a cover. Once the question was answered or the story was told, though, they didn't hang up. They talked.
They talked a little bit about how much their lives had changed over the past few months, but they never discussed that night. Instead, they talked about movies and work and told each other silly things they never hadn't told anyone else. Then, two nights ago while they were on the phone, Pam's kitchen light went out.
"Crap."
"What?" Jim asked.
"I just turned my kitchen light on and it the bulb went out."
"Do you have another bulb?"
"No, it is one of those long fluorescent bulbs like in the ceiling at work."
"Oh... see Beesley? If you had another kitchen this wouldn't be a problem."
"Yes, thank you. When I start making Assistant to the Regional Manager money the first thing I am going to splurge on is a new kitchen."
"Assistant Regional Manager... please, why do you have to hurt?"
She giggled. "I'll just use the light over the stove until I can get a new bulb."
The next day Pam stopped at the hardware store on the way home from work and picked up a light bulb. That night she put Jim on speaker phone while she used a small step stool to change it.
"Okay, I have the pins lined up."
"Good, now turn the bulb counter-clockwise and it should click into place."
"Yeah, it did."
"Team work... now turn on the light."
Pam stepped off the small stool and flipped the switch. Nothing.
"No! It didn't come on! What did I do?"
"It didn't?"
Pam picked up her cordless phone and switched off the speaker. "No... my first home repair was a failure... I'm so depressed." Pam said with mock drama.
"No, no... you did a good job. It must be the ballast."
"Ballast? I don't even now what that is."
"It's the white piece on the end that controls the current. It must be bad. Just turn it off for now. If you need me to... I uh... I could come up sometime and help you fix it." It was an excuse and she knew it. He was trying feeling out if she would invite him to her apartment. She smiled.
"Yeah, thanks. I'll call the landlord tomorrow and see what he says. Thank you though... I might have to take you up on that." They were playing a game. Of course her landlord could fix it, and if not, she could always ask Roy--he was much closer. But now, she knew he would drive over to see her, and he knew that she would want that. Level one completed.
Pam didn't call her landlord the next day. Instead, she came up with a plan. She decided she would email Jim Friday morning to invite him to Scranton that night. Her broken kitchen light would be her excuse, but she would suggest he say for dinner and the night. Pam only had one bedroom but she had a full size pull-out couch in the living room. Her ears burned at the thought of him sleeping just one room away. She pictured the night in her head; she imagined they would fix the light, she would hold the step stool for him. He'd be so tall that he would have to duck his head under the light. When her kitchen was, again, properly lit they would turn off the light and eat take-out at her small dinette table and share a bottle of wine. They would probably talk and laugh a lot. She missed laughing with him. Sometimes, she just missed laughing. When the night was over she would make up the couch for him. Maybe they would kiss. Probably not more than that. She shaved her legs Friday morning anyway -- just in case.
She got to work early Friday morning. Pam tried not to come in any sooner than she had to these days. The work day went much slower without him around. But today, she had a reason to get to work early. She wrote down all of the after hours messages and did her morning faxes. When she was done, she got herself a cup of tea and put her plan into motion.
To: Jim.Halpert@dundermifflin.com
From: Pam.Beesley@dundermifflin.com
Subject: Good Morning
Hi there--
So, I called my landlord and he is out of town until next week. I was wondering if your offer is still available? I thought maybe you could come up tonight and stay over (I have a pull out couch). I'll buy you dinner for the trouble. :-)
Just let me know if you are free. I know it is kind of short notice.
Pam
She read over the email nearly 13 times before she finally hit send.
She didn't have time to contemplate what she had done like she had with the fax because Michael ordered everyone into the conference to room to figure out carpools for the Diwali festival. That was the one wrench in Pam's plan--she had to get out of going to the festival. Kelly wasn't very happy with her, "I'm kind of tired." excuse so Pam pulled out the big guns and went with the pity out, "I don't don't have anyone to go with." It didn't really work either, but after Pam didn't jump at Kelly's offer to take Dwight as her date, Kelly backed down.
Two hours later, Pam still hadn't heard from Jim.
The next meeting had been much more interesting than the first. Michael decided the team needed to know more about Diwali and Indian culture. Of course, knowing nothing himself, he enlisted Kelly's help for one part and handed out the Kama Sutra for the rest. Pam felt her ears burn as she looked at the pages. The cartoon images were almost comical, except for the fact that they were doing something that wasn't necessarily funny. She tried not to stare at the pictures, but her eyes traced over the faces on the illustrations, their hands, their bodies. It had been a long time since Pam had had sex. For the most part she was alright with that. It was nice to have this time alone to figure out what she wanted and needed in a relationship. But, as she looked at the cartoon people on the pages, she missed it. She thought for just a second of what it might be like to do what was described on page four with Jim.
After her Kama Sutra confiscated by Toby, and the meeting was over, Pam went back to her desk.
She had a new email.
To: Pam.Beesley@dundermifflin.com
From: Jim.Halpert@dundermifflin.com
Subject: RE: Good Morning
Hi
I can't. I'm sorry. I really wish I could, but we have to work late tonight and by the time I got there it would be like 11pm.
Next weekend I have to go see my grandmother, and your landlord will be back by then. Sorry.
Are you going to be around tomorrow? I'll call you.
Jim
Pam couldn't help the feeling in her stomach as she read his email. She shouldn't have gotten her hopes up. It was short notice. Still, she couldn't help but feel that his email was kind of cold--guarded. She couldn't blame him. Maybe he was worried she was just using him because she didn't have Roy anymore. She couldn't care less about the light bulb. She just wanted to see him. Maybe she should have just said that. Maybe she was reading too much into it. She decided just to send him a friendly note back and pretend like it was no big deal. Pam was good at that.
To: Jim.Halpert@dundermifflin.com
From: Pam.Beesley@dundermifflin.com
Subject: RE: RE: Good Morning
No, I understand. It was short notice. It's no problem. Yeah, call me to tomorrow.
Have a good night :-)
Pam
p.s. If I said the phrase, "Union of the Monkey", what does that make you think of?
Five minutes later Pam's cell phone vibrated.
Jim Halpert: Is it the name of a sushi roll? Now I want sushi.
Pam giggled
"These are not my shoes." Michael declared from the back seat of her small car.
So, this had been plan B. The Diwali festival. It hadn't been all that unpleasant. The dancing and food had been fun, and of course, it was always a good time to see what embarrassing thing Michael would do for attention. That is, until he had tried to kiss her. She had tried to text Jim a few times from the festival, but she hadn't heard back from him. The same feeling in her stomach from earlier that day was back. After she dropped Michael off, she planned to go home and watch a movie to take her mind off of Jim.
"It's just like that show 'Taxi Cab Confessions'.
"If you say one more word, I'm stopping the car."
"I'm sorry."
She should have just stayed home.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Willow is the author of 10 other stories.
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