Over the course of a few months, several small, but significant changes have been made at Dunder-Mifflin Scranton.
With the exception of Andy Bernard, everyone who had transferred in from Stamford has either quit, or accepted job offers elsewhere. The reasons why have eluded Michael, who’s simply glad to have his old “family” back.
“It was like The Brady Bunch,” Michael explained to the camera, “only, all of the new kids were spoiled, and ran around breaking things, and using breast pumps, and were mean to Alice. I mean, come on. Just--who doesn’t love Alice? Noooo thank you.”
Since Michael had also insisted that his old buddy Jim get his old desk back, Ryan now sits at the back of the office, directly opposite Kelly’s desk. This is exactly where Jim goes when he decides to update his emergency contact information.
He’s been dreading this all day, ever since he’d lost the coin toss that morning.
"Tails," she had said, flipping over the quarter. She showed him the winning side, triumphant. "Suck it, Halpert."
When he raps on the side of Ryan’s cubicle to get his attention, Kelly’s in the middle of showing Ryan the newest pictures of Suri Cruise.
“—because, oh my god, she is adorable! I mean, look at her! Everyone totally thought she was going to be like, disfigured or something, because no one saw pictures of her for like, months, and they thought, ‘something’s gotta be wrong with this kid’, but she’s so cute! She’s walking now, too! Don’t you just love the paparazzi, Ryan?”
When Kelly finally stops to catch her breath, her eyes are shining, just a little glazed over. She looks expectantly towards Jim.
His stomach lurches sickeningly forward, awaiting the inevitable question. He silently pleads with God to spare him, but when dealing with Kelly Kapoor, God shows Jim no mercy.
“Hi, Jim! Oh my god, I haven’t talked to Pam yet, but I know you guys are finally, finally going out and it is so totally awesome! Are you and Pam going to get married?”
“Oh, um…” Jim’s definitely not ready to answer this.
“Because if you are, you two would totally have a cute baby,” Kelly continues, ignoring the pained expression on Jim’s face, “I mean, so cute. I would totally throw Pam a baby shower here. Wouldn’t that be perfect? Or, you could have the baby first, and then wait forever and get married in a secret ceremony in Italy, like Tom and Katie, right? That would be so romantic.”
Jim shoots a desperate look at Ryan, who is looking intently, purposefully at his computer screen.
“Wow. I, uh, I don’t know, Kelly. Listen, Ryan? I just need to update my emergency contact information, so if you could just--“
“What would you name the baby? It would have to be something amazing, Jim. Don’t name her after fruit, okay? That's so lame. All these celebrities think it's great, but you just know those poor kids are going to be teased so much. Ooh, Jim, can Ryan and I babysit?”
At this last sentence Ryan’s eyes widen. He shakes his head vigorously at Jim, and thrusts the necessary form at him.
Jim sighs and takes the form. Before she can say another word, he holds a hand up, interrupting her.
“Kelly? If you really want to know, we’ve gone out once. Just once. And we’re taking it slow. It’s really not a big deal. So…don’t call US Weekly just yet, okay?”
Kelly smiles brightly, and stands up.
“Eeeeee, Jim! I’m so happy for you guys!”
The force of her hug knocks him backwards, but he smiles a little as he squeezes her back.
****
When he finally gets back to reception, Pam’s still playing Sudoku. He leans over and asks,
“Lunch?”
She looks up from her computer, grinning.
“Definitely,” she says. She closes out a few windows on her screen, and stands up. “How’d it go?”
Jim pulls a face and slumps over the top of her desk, feigning exhaustion.
“That bad, huh?” she asks, eyes twinkling.
“So bad,” he nods, and stands up. “I think Kelly pretty much has our future planned out for us, right down to our retirement. I’m not sure what it means, exactly, but I’m sure it involves a lot of pink, or glitter. So, Vegas, maybe. And, um, I like the guy, but don’t let Ryan anywhere near our kids, okay?”
“Our what?” Pam frowns as he removes their jackets from the coat rack.
“Just trust me on this.”
He holds her coat open for her and she slides her arms in.
“Okay,” she says, shrugging into her jacket. As they walk out, she lifts up on her toes, and kisses him on the cheek. “So, do I get to choose this time?”
“As long as it isn’t Hooters,” Jim replies. He shakes his head. “I’ll never understand your taste, Beesly.”
Pam giggles, and slides her arm into his.
He grins and pulls her closer as they exit the office, the door swinging closed behind them.
Author's Chapter Notes:
This is basically the equivalent of slipping on a pair of rose-colored glasses after The Merger.I wanted to exist in my own little angst-free universe, and this is what happened. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
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