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Oh, I love this story! It's so nice to see the Halperts happy, and Pam's realization from the first part is precious.
'I look cute doing everything.' Totally agree!
Lovely work!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

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I'm really awkward with words, but still.
I'm sorry for all that you went through and for all you feel right now. It's terrible. A few years ago, I had a similar experience, and when I read your story, I felt it all and recognized my own emotion. And the way you wrote it, while you feel all of this... it's beautiful and heartwrenching. You're so strong that you could turn your feelings into words and share your story. I really, really hope that you'll feel better.
All I can do right now is to send you many hugs and wishes, though I want to do more for you. I'm here if you need me.

Author's Response: I don’t think you’re awkward with words at all. Thank you, Dernhelm. I appreciate your kind words so much! 

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What a beautiful and heartwrenching start!
Poor Jim. His aching is so palpable, and its facilitation seems to be so impossible... at that moment. And poor Pam... I feel her confusion and fear and protectiveness of Roy — somehow, its protectiveness of herself, I guess. And she knows, or, at least suspects Jim's feeling and it only made everything worse and more complicating. And the rocking desk is the perfect metaphor for their state.
"You're everything, Pam. I wish he treated you like that." I'm dying here because it's... it's... it's so selfless and tender and... gah! Who's that damned person who broke the spell? Okay, perhaps, perhaps, if Pam kissed Jim right here right now, it would have unpleasant consequences, but God! it would be so good...
The whole exchange between Roy and Jim is good, Captain Jack's remark is excellent (and so on time because it caused a reaction so pleasantly different from canon...), and... you know, I feel sorry for Roy. Really sorry. Because "The axis of Roy's world isn't balanced on her very presence like his is."
And... if you treat you fiancee (who supposed to be the main person in your life) like a second choice... perhaps, you aren't happy that much either. Perhaps, you're just content with stability in your life... and it's Pam and Roy's tragedy.
And Pam's realization on the desk and her final words... I'm a happier person than I was before reading! Thank you so much for this story, and I crossed my fingers for the upcoming update ;)

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Dernhelm! 

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Oh, God, it's beautiful and heartwrenching. I like that honest Pam so much, and yet, I dread what changes would be caused by that decision of her. Can't wait to find out!
It's awesome that you're back!

Author's Response: Thanks very much! I really missed writing just for fun!

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Oh, Pam. I feel her fear so vividly. That's right, she's not about grand gestures, but these tiny things she's doing... they are enormous.
I hope Jim will understand that.

Author's Response:

Pam is really trying her best, and yeah, in that sens this is a big deal.

Thanks a lot for reviewing! 

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I want to blame Pam for not giving an immediate answer, I want to blame Jim for not giving her enough time, but the truth is that their reactions were as natural as only they could be. And it hurts, oh, it hurts so much! I feel like my heart broke into a thousand pieces, and though I put them together, some parts are missing. And they'll be missing until I read the update of your story.
Thank you!

Author's Response: Thanks for your comments! Yes as much fun as writing them hooking up was, I couldn’t help but think about what the consequences would be. They’ve both put themselves in a tough spot thanks to their impulsiveness. I hope chapter two provides the missing heart pieces! 

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I have a lump in my throat right now because it so painful but at the same time I see clearly why Pam felt this way and why she said that she said, and it's so, so real, and that's why it's aching so much, and I'm babbling right now, and god, I hope you have the second chapter half-written somewhere!
Beautiful work!

Author's Response: Aww, thank you Dernhelm. I don't know why I'm drawn to the angst but here we are. 😂Thank you for the lovely review, as always. 

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I made a tremendous mistake reading this story after 'Aeternum'...
'in a way he used to only do with her.'
I'm crying.
'a meaningful statement on the symbolism of a baby...and him.'
I'm wailing.
'she knew he heard the words 'I wouldn't let them' as clear as if she had spoken them aloud.'
I need to take a pause now. Okay, I feel slightly better, continue.
'The levity of his comment fell and landed on the cheap linoleum tiles at their feet.'
Nope, the same pain all over again.
But the ending, oh, the ending is heartbreakingly beautiful, and I hate my foreknowledge about the show's events...
Thank you so much for this story! And especially thank you that you published it at the same time with 'Aeternum,' so I can go and reread the last chapter, reminding myself that there are places where Jim and Pam are together and happy...

Author's Response: I'm so glad you could bounce back and forth. I always like to return to the JAM 'happy place' as well. :) Thank you as always, Dernhelm. <3

Do I want to cry? Do I want to laugh? Do I want to make a lot of 'aww' noises? I don't know, probably I want to do all of that and THANK YOU for that!
(Seriously. Lately, I have some trouble with feeling things — I feel mostly numb to everything that used to bring me emotions (or potentially could cause feelings) — and now I feel many things, which is so nice for a change).
And I love your writing, it's so poetic and delicate, like watercolors on fine paper. Especially I love these lines:
"she saw something more complex, more like a melodic song with notes of concern and pain and regret each playing their part across his melancholy visage."
and
"he had read her like the pages of his favorite novel before sliding the bookmark into the crease and shutting it for another day."
That's so heartachingly beautiful.
And I like these subtle changes you brought to the canon. I like their silent conversation and acknowledging each other's emotions, it really feels like something natural, and I hope that those changes will lately play their role. Can't wait to see that!
Also... thank you so much for not letting Pam fucked Danny. That little thing made me a little happier!

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Oh, they became comfortable with each other so quickly — I like it very much! And all of these happened during calls and Zoom meetings, I'm full of anticipation of that might happen if they actually meet.
"Great. It's a d- settled then." - this line is so adorable and just a tad sad, but I love it!
I'm looking forward to the continuation!

Author's Response:

Thanks very much for your review! I'm not sure about how fast or slow would this scenario work, but I'm leaning towards fast. At least in my case, while on quarantine I found my self getting very friendly with a couple of people.

Cheers! 

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I feel sorry for Pam so much and, at the same time, I'm so proud of her. You wrote her turmoils beautifully realistic. 'Too. What else had Roy taken from her?' I like this line so much!
And the ending is perfect. I like stories in which Jim saves Pam, but there is something fascinatingly beautiful in the stories where Pam saves herself on her own...

Author's Response:

Thanks very much for reviewing!

Me too! I love when Pam stands for herself and does her thing without help. In this case Jim sort of inspired her to move forward, but it's mostly her, making some important choices. 

I read this chapter right after waking up, and it made me much happier than my usual morning cup of coffee.
I don't even know where to start — I LOVE everything about it. Their conversation in the car. The way Pam forgot about social distancing and hugged Jim. Red and black striped pajama pants. The dinner. Oh, the dinner and 'it's a date,' and the fact that he combed his hair made my heart melt. And the sadness of their college and art discussion. And 'I like you.' It was so sweet and adorable, and, perhaps, that's my favorite taste of JAM.
I'm so grateful to you that you're writing this story, and I'm looking forward to the next chapters so much. Thank you!

Author's Response:

Thanks very much for such wonderful review! I'm glad you liked it. I love when they banter/flirt, and doing it over the internet brings back some memories of many years ago. 

I was not sure about who should hug whom, but then I thought Pam is a little vulnerable right now, and feeling both decided about her decision and lonely because of the consequences.  

I hope you like what's coming next. 

Cheers!