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I loved Jim’s note to Pam so much. I think (provided this doesn’t end in heartbreak 😱) that the idea of Jim leaving something behind deliberately, and having enough faith in Pam that he believes she’ll get there, is actually so much nicer than him just accidentally leaving an umbrella. And then the callback to the time a yogurt pot lid brought Jim back, and Pam appreciating what he gave up for her then, was just lovely. I really love how you’ve written all of their emotions and thought processes in this. (Also loving Clark here, lol). And now I’m actually on the edge of my seat for the next chapter!

Author's Response:

I'm so glad you think so and it allowed me to give the umbrella symbolism that was inspired by the Setting Sail lyrics (last chapter but anyway).

The note also inspired by the lyrics to the Gold song (Jake Isaac/India Arie) but I felt it didn't need to be many words, as I said about Pam's note too - it was more about the lid that spoke volumes.

Glad you like the Clark bit. He seemed to bring the humor in the episode and since he was still pretty new I thought he'd be pretty uncomfortable with a crying Pam and would react as such.

I hope you will enjoy what's coming next.  

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I’ve been so terrible about reading and reviewing on MTT lately (or for a while), so I am trying to best to play catch up! I love that you are tackling the hard job of writing a season 9 fic, and lady I think you are doing an excellent job.

Season 9 is so difficult. Any of us who have been in a long term relationship or marriage know how easily things can start to break down if you don’t constantly communicate and keep each other abreast of how you are feeling. And it’s not easy to be honest and vulnerable, even with the person you love the most and have built a life with. I think that you’ve done an excellent job with showing that through their internal monologues, the letters and assignments, the small ways they try to reach out to each other while still dancing around the big hard discussions because they are big and hard. And you’re doing it with some really lovely moments and imagery; I especially love the bits about sunrise and sunset.

I know a lot of people have a lot of feelings about season 9 and the arc that it took Jim and Pam on. I don’t think we can say “Pam’s a selfish bitch” without ending that sentence with “and so was Jim,” because that is the truth. Jim was uncommunicative and secretive and Pam was uncommunicative and scared, and it brought out the worst in both of them. I don’t think it’s fair to paint Jim as the good guy in season 9 (and you didn’t, but I’m a bit hot under the collar about another review you’ve received) because working full time, single parenting, and wondering if your relationship is going to fall apart isn’t easy and wanting to keep your family intact isn’t selfish. Especially when there are clear instances of Jim having an absolute blast in Philadelphia without checking in on Pam or the kids and not attempting to put herself in her shoes. The thing about season 9 is that they both make awful decisions and it isn’t until towards the end of the season that they look at the issue as “us vs the problem” and not “me vs you.” But I shouldn’t take something that someone who thinks that having the thought process of an artist means you can’t understand how a fictional start up works says seriously.

Anyway my own feelings about your other reviews aside, I think you are doing an excellent job with a heavy subject. Jim and Pam both feel in character and easy to sympathize with, and we see how events like this in a marriage can be so hard to reconcile. I look forward to seeing how you take us through along the rest of their rocky path and back into the sunshine.

Author's Response:

Hello BT-  

First off thanks for taking the time to read and share your thoughts. I said it before and will repeat it again, I never thought I'd be writing a season 9 fic but once I was inspired to, it kinda took over. I originally thought this would be a one-shot and not a multi-chapter.

Season 9 was difficult because of the Pam and Jim arc but as someone who has been married for long enough to know it wasn't without truth and realism. As I said, marriage is work - it needs to be cared for, even if you are soul mates, especially if you are soul mates. And we know sometimes these 2 forget to communicate - thinking they know everything the other might be thinking (this is shown in the Roy's Wedding episode). I know you agree there.

It was not my intention to show either side as right or wrong, and like you say they needed to stop looking at it from a me vs you and get to the heart of the problem. And that took some soul searching and outside help. Some thinking about their own history and remembering how they felt when all they wanted was each other and there was an obstacle in the way. I'm glad you feel I've been able to show both of them coming to realize where they made mistakes and how to get back. I'm so please you liked the sunrise/sunset parts. I was very into writing those. Where I live we get some unbelievable sunrises/sunsets and that was a vision I wanted to bring to life - plus there was the symbolism I hope came across. 

I think the show (by the nature of it being a sitcom) glossed over some of the journey to get there and that was what I hoped to bring out a bit more. I loved the hug and the flashback to the wedding but I did feel that alone was just a first step. However in a sitcom it's hard to get at what might have been in their heads and pleased you feel that is coming across and in their voices.

Without saying too much (as it will be said when I'm done), there was something in the timing. 

Once again I want to thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts. It's truly one of the things I love most about this community, the way in which we can connect through shared love of reading, writing and Jam.

Hope you enjoy the ending.