Date: June 08, 2007 06:27 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
so nice to read a story from another character's point of view. i actually felt bad for roy! nice job.
Date: February 24, 2007 02:58 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
Darryl? As a lounge lizard? He's a man of many talents...
9 [Report This]Date: January 03, 2007 07:35 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
*flail*
You are far too good to me for your own good. This is wonderful and sweet and I almost sort of want to hug Roy. WAY TO MAKE ME FEEL, YOU. :D
Author's Response:
Haaa, thank YOU for suggesting I write a boys' night out! Although, I think I made it more sad than what you probably had in mind. :)
And you totally want to hug Roy. Admitting it is the first step. Go on, you know you want to....:)
Date: January 03, 2007 01:58 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
That was such a good read. I really enjoyed how you added dimensions to Roy, and really showed why he seemed to hang around, not quite able to move on. The Roy/Darryl interactions are great. :)
Author's Response: Thank you! I was hoping that it would make Roy seem less pathetic in this perpetual hang-dog thing he's got going on. Everyone always talks about how Pam ended a 10 year relationship, but so did Roy. It's all so sad.
9 [Report This]Date: January 02, 2007 05:24 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
Oh, this was so good, and so sad. I love your take on how completely into her he was right away in high school, and the proposal story and how they twisted it - and how you just jump from there to the break up, because we kind of know already how it went downhill from there. And this: “You think.” He felt helpless. He wanted to convince her that he was happy, she was happy, THEY could be happy, but he felt blindsided, and he realized with a wave of nausea that that she hadn’t drawn him from memory in years.
So, so sad. But I really love Darryl's pep talk. He's so rational, and so right that they've both been doing better since the breakup. It's good to see Roy starting to realize that.
Teeny thing: The only way he knew for sure that she was there is the glass of orange juice sitting on the nightstand. I think the "is" should be past tense.
Author's Response:
Thank you! I was worried about the big time jump in flashback, but I figured that as far as Roy was concerned, there was no real problems until she ended it. Poor sad bearded Roy.
Oh, and thank you for pointing out the tense problem - I originally had the story structured a bit differently, and all of the flashbacks were in present tense - I was convinced I missed something, but you can only stare at the screen for so long. I went backand fixed it. Sometimes all you need is another pair of eyes. :)
10 [Report This]Date: January 02, 2007 10:29 am Title: Boys' Night Out
Aw, poor sad Roy. I really like your version of the Roy/Pam backstory. I love all the details here, and the flashback structure keeps the pacing really nice. I particularly liked Darryl pointing out that Pam is doing so well, now, because I agree!
Great job!
Author's Response:
Thank you! I'm so glad that the story doesn't drag, it's about 3 times as long as I normally write. And you know that Darryl is noticing just how good Pam is looking, hee.
Date: January 01, 2007 09:46 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
Really well done, Bennie. I was sticking up for Roy before he got hot, (oh, the Beard, the BEARD!) and you've done a great job showing his side, his feelings.
Author's Response: I swear, the BEARD is too too much for me at times. And it should always be capitalized, because it adds so much hotness. Thank you!
Date: January 01, 2007 07:26 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
Love all the details in this -- the hockey game, the sketchbook, the 3 pieces of tape! Yove've done a great job filling in the backstory to Roy trying to pull himself together -- and Darryl with his keyboard -- priceless!
Author's Response: Thank you, lisahoo! Hee, Darryl should always have his keyboard with him - I was so disappointed when he didn't have it in his office with him during the new episode. :)
Date: January 01, 2007 07:15 pm Title: Boys' Night Out
You have such a wonderful way of writing perfect little details. I love the idea of Darryl trying to help Roy get over Pam and every one of Roy's flashbacks was so realistic,
This broke my heart: He could tell by her voice that he woke her up, but within half an hour she was there, her hair thrown into a sloppy ponytail, her eyes red from either lack of sleep or tears. He cried in her car the whole way back to their, no, his, apartment, and begged her to stay the night with him. He could see her hesitate, but then she helped him into bed, took off his clothes; she even sat next to him and wiped his face with a cold washcloth and told him to sleep. By the time he woke up the next morning, she was gone.
So beautiful and sad, especially Pam not having his gift with her when she left work. I'm glad Roy decides to give in to the dance after all.
Wonderful, as your work always is!
Author's Response: Awwww, you always leave the sweetest reviews! Thank you for the feedback, when I sat down to write about Roy, I found he was a hard one to get in, head-wise...so I'm so glad that his flashbacks seemed realistic. Thank you thank you thank you. :)