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He couldn't remember the last time she had looked this free. He imagined that this must have been what she was like as a little girl. Giddy and silly and sweet. The woman sitting across from him at the table was so different from the one who met his eyes over her desk at work each day. But it was still her. If he hadn't been sure before tonight, he definitely knew now that he was completely in love with Pam Beesly.

Her speech was utterly ridiculous. If she hadn't been so drunk he would have been laughing at her so much that when she saw his face she would have come over and pummeled him for making fun of her. He wondered if after acknowledging Michael and Dwight, she would go on to mention him. When she didn't, he wondered if she would ever know how much trouble he had gone through to get her that award, instead of the one she had been expecting.

She finished her speech and ran to him and for a split second he let himself pretend that she was his. That she was running to him because she wanted him as much as he had always wanted her. But in that split second he suddenly found her face just inches away. And then just as suddenly she was kissing him firmly and it was all he could do not to kiss her back.

Her lips were soft and small and better than he had ever imagined. Her nose was up against his own and his fists clenched as he willed himself again not to take advantage of this situation. She was drunk and he wasn't sure if she'd remember this tomorrow, and everyone was watching and this wasn't how he had wanted this to happen.

When she stopped he moved back into his chair, not really sure what was wrong with his legs but knowing that they wouldn't support him much longer. He kept silently repeating to himself "she's drunk, she's drunk, she's drunk, she's drunk..." It was a mantra to keep him from thinking about what had just happened. That kiss meant nothing. She was still engaged to Roy. Everything was still exactly the same.

But... she had kissed him. After years of being best friends it was their first kiss and that wasn't something he could think about without smiling.


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