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Story Notes:

This was the story I'd been looking for when I found "Don't Look at What You Can't See". I started writing this back in March, hit some writers block, then didn't feel right about continuing with this after Jenna got hurt... then I forgot about it, and now, I just managed to finish it. Hope you enjoy!

This story takes place right after Christmas in season 2.

Disclaimer: I own nothing related to "The Office" or NBC.

Pam was not one for shopping, for buying clothes or shoes just because they were cute. She was more reasonable about her spending, using her money on the necessities and saving for her wedding. She had her five skirts, a few more shirts, and a couple of cardigans for work, the chunky black dress shoes she wore into work every day, and the white Keds she put on once she got into the office. She had a couple of pairs of old jeans to wear on weekends, a few cute t-shirts, and and the ever-essential hoodie.

But one day during the week between Christmas and New Years, she wore the cute new shoes she'd gotten from her cousin as a Christmas gift. They were black, shiny, and had a pointy heel, which she wasn't used to, but she liked how they made her a little taller, and how they made her legs look a little sexier.

Before long, though, she found the heel problematic. Her ankles were sore by the time ten o'clock came around, and she'd forgotten her sneakers at home. At about eleven, she picked up her green teapot that Jim had just given her a week earlier, and stood up, planning to head to the kitchen to heat up some water for tea. She lost her balance on her new heels, and her foot twisted suddenly, shooting a searing pain through her ankle. She collapsed to the floor and her teapot went with her, bouncing once and then shattering a few feet away. Tears instantly sprang to her eyes out of pain, embarrassment, and sadness that she'd broken her gift from Jim.

She heard a collective gasp from the office, a scuffle from the film crew, and then Jim was the first to appear behind her desk, followed by the cameras.

Jim instantly kneeled down next to her, asked if she was okay, and wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumbs.

"I broke my teapot," she said looking up at Jim with more tears hovering on her lower lids.

"It's okay. I'll get you another one. Are you hurt?"

"Mmm, my ankle. It hurts a lot." She took in a sudden breath through her teeth.

"Oh my god, Pam!" Michael exclaimed as he appeared behind the reception desk, pushing the boom mic operator out of the way.

"Michael, I'm fine," Pam said, shakily. 

"Which one?" Jim asked, his concentration not broken by a frantic Michael.

"The right one," she answered, carefully shifting and straightening her leg out in front of her. She winced in pain as she did so.

"Oh, man, I remember the time I burned my foot. That was bad. Probably worse than this..." Michael rambled on.

Jim, completely ignoring Michael's commentary, reached out and gently touched Pam's ankle, lightly running his fingers over it. His face molded into and even more concerned expression, if that was possible. "It's already swollen. You might have broken it. Do you want me to go get Roy so he can drive you to the hospital?"

"Um, Roy's out of town this week visiting some college friends," she answered with a tremor still in her voice. 

"Oh, okay. I'll take you, then?"

She nodded, still looking down at her ankle.

Jim moved closer to her, "Here, wrap your arm around my shoulders so I can pick you up."

She quietly did as Jim suggested. She probably could have hopped to the car on her good foot if he would have helped her, but she didn't have anything against him carrying her, either. It felt good to be taken care of so thoroughly. Jim slipped one of his arms under her knees, and the other behind her back. As she was lifted up in his arms, she could see her office mates looking worried.

"Are you okay, Pam?" she heard Phyllis ask.

"Yeah, Jim's going to take me to the hospital. I think I broke my ankle," she answered.

Jim dipped down a little so she could grab her purse off of her desk, and then straightened back up.

"Alright, feel free to take the rest of the day off, both of you!" Michael said as if it wasn't already a given.

Pam heard a loud "Good luck, Pam!" from Dwight as the door closed behind them.

In the elevator on the way down, Pam's ankle was beginning to throb more insistently, so she let her neck go slack and let her forehead rest on the side of Jim's jaw.

"You okay?" he asked softly.

"Yeah, it just hurts," she answered quietly into his neck.

*** 

The ride to the hospital felt much longer than it really was. Pam couldn't find a comfortable position for her foot. Her ankle was still throbbing badly, and she laid her head back on the headrest, closing her eyes.

A moment later, she felt Jim's hand flutter tentatively over hers. "You doing okay?"

She nodded and wrapped her fingers around his hand in response.

*** 

As they arrived at the ER, Jim parked the car in the ER lot, and went inside to get a nurse with a wheelchair for Pam. 

Pam appreciated Jim's helpful presence as he registered her at the front window, let her sit with her injured leg across his lap as she filled out her paperwork, and kept her mind off the hours of waiting by planning elaborate pranks on Dwight with her and playing "Desert Island".

When the nurse finally came out to wheel Pam in, Jim automatically stood up and began to follow, but paused at the double doors that led to the patient cubicles, not sure if Pam wanted him to come with her.

"Can my friend come with me?" Pam asked the nurse after looking back at Jim.

"Of course," the nurse said, smiling.

Jim shoved his hands into his pockets and silently followed close behind Pam and the nurse.

***

Since Pam's ankle was most likely broken, when they reached an empty cubicle, the nurse helped Pam onto the gurney bed and stacked up some pillows to keep her foot elevated. She hooked her up to an IV, as was customary for anyone who visited the ER. Jim took the chair next to the bed.

"How're you doing?" Jim asked after the nurse left, moving his chair closer.

"I'm okay," Pam answered and sighed.

 "You sure? I could get Michael to come down here and tell you some jokes..."

"Oh my gosh, no," Pam giggled.

Jim laughed. "I know. Could you imagine?"

"No, I really don't want to." Pam's smile faded quickly, and Jim could tell she was in more pain than she was letting on.

"Hey," Jim said, venturing to sweep Pam's bangs away from her eyes with his fingers. "The doctor will probably give you some awesome pain pills in a little while, and you won't even feel a thing.

"Oh, just what I need- to be so high for the next few days I won't know what's going on."

"Hey, don't knock it, Pam. Not until you try it."

They were laughing together when the doctor came in. "Well, our patient seems to be in good spirits," he said. "I'm doctor Carey." He shook both Pam's and Jim's hands, and then began a preliminary check of Pam's foot and ankle. His necessary moving and prodding of the painful area brought tears of pain to Pam's eyes, and when Jim noticed, he began to run a hand up and down her arm. She gave him a grateful smile.

The doctor said he wanted to have her ankle and foot X-rayed, gave her a cold pack for it, and gave her something for the pain. She felt a strange rush from the Morphine the doctor had injected into her IV, and she reflexively reached out for Jim's hand in her nervousness. He held her hand with one hand, and ran the fingers of his other hand up and down the inside of arm. She began to relax almost immediately.

"I feel funny," Pam slurred calmly. 

"That was just from the pain meds they gave you. It'll be over in a minute. Then you'll just feel silly for a while."

Sure enough, Jim was right. The strange rush that had come over her was gone quickly, and she felt pretty much normal, if not more chatty than usual.

"Jim, I'm glad you're here," she declared. She watched him smile, and could feel herself smiling also. "I don't think Roy would stay with me and hold my hand like this. He'd probably sit across the room reading a magazine and then fall asleep with his head back against the wall and his mouth open."

The look on Jim's face as she said this was a mix of so many things that she couldn't accurately decipher through the haze of pain medication.

"What's the matter?" she asked.

He sighed, looking away. "Nothing."

"Okay..." Pam was too exhausted to try to get to the deeper meaning of his reaction. "Wow. my ankle does feel a lot better. I could probably play hopscotch right now."

Jim started laughing again.

"What?"

"You're just loopy is all."

"No I'm not. I feel perfectly normal."

"Pam, one second you're practically falling asleep, and then you're talking again, but really sloooowly."

"I am not!!" she started laughing.

"Yes you are. This is you," he said, lolling his head, closing his eyes, and then slowly becoming alert again with slow, wide eyes, imitating her drugged-up state.

 She started laughing. "Then why do I feel so normal?"

"The magic of drugs."

*** 

They were at the hospital for a couple more hours. Pam's X-rays revealed a hairline fracture. They gave her an ankle brace and some crutches, and a prescription for a few days' worth of pain meds, and then sent her on her way.

"How much does it hurt now?" Jim asked in the car on the way to Pam's house.

"A little," Pam said, slurring a little, obviously still loopy from the pain meds. "Can you hold my hand again like before?" she asked.

Jim smiled and reached over to weave his fingers with hers.

"Thank you," she said, closing her eyes.

As they arrived at her apartment, Jim parked in her parking space, as her car was still at work, and went around to help her on the other side of the car. He picked her up, figuring she was still out of it and not used to walking on crutches. When they reached her door, he leaned in so that she could unlock it.

"Okay, where do you want to camp out?" he asked. "Couch or bed?"

"Bed," she said, and jutted out a finger in the direction of her bedroom.

Jim carried her down the dim hallway to the bedroom, and after turning on the light switch, set her down on the bed.

“Do you want me to get you some pajamas or something to change into?” he asked.

“Yeah, um, my blue flannel pajama pants and sweatshirt from that top drawer there.” She pointed to the dresser across the room. Feeling strangely privileged to be going into Pam’s pajama drawer, he pulled out the requested PJ’s and walked back across the room to hand them to her. He looked down at the large size of the ankle brace, and wondered if she’d be able to get her pant leg over it.

“Um, do you—need--?”

Oh, no. Thanks, I think I can handle it,” she said, blushing.

“Okay, cool." He scratched the back of his head. "Well, I’m going to go pick up your prescription. I dropped off the script on our way here when you were still sleeping in the car. Will you be okay?”

“Oh yeah, I’ll just turn the TV on, and get under the covers, and I’m all good.”

“Okay, cool,” Jim said, turning on the TV for her and bringing her the remote. “I’ll be back soon.”

“Jim—,” she called after him as he disappeared around the doorway.

“Yeah?” he asked, poking his head back in.

“Thank you so much,” she said with a watery smile.

“Hey, no problem at all. It’s what friends are for.”

She nodded, still smiling, and Jim headed out.

*** 

Jim returned shortly with a few bags of things he'd picked up at the store. It was nearing seven P.M., and neither of them had had anything to eat all day. He went into the bedroom to check on Pam. She was watching the Food Network, all cuddled up under the blankets, propped up against a bunch of pillows.

“Hey!” she said when he entered the room. The meds had worn off some while he'd been gone, and she seemed much more alert.

“Hey, how’s it going?”

“Not bad… I’m glad you’re here.”

Jim smiled. “Here’s your pain meds. You need any right now?”

She shook her head, “No, it doesn’t hurt too much right now.”

“How about some dinner?”

“Jim, you don’t have to cook me anything!”

“I want to. It’s no big deal. I just got some bread and cheese for grilled cheese, and some carrots. Easy.”

Pam smiled. "Aww, I've missed your grilled cheese. Been craving it for a while."

Jim's stomach fluttered pleasantly, and he smiled. "Well, you shall have it, shortly."

***

Jim prepared their food, and it felt kind of strange but kind of wonderful to take command of her kitchen. It was like he belonged there- easily finding her plates and glasses, the frying pan, a spatula for the sandwich-flipping. He got himself acquainted with the eccentricities of her stove, the strange sounds coming from the old fridge.

He smiled when he put away the chocolate chocolate chip ice cream he'd gotten as a surprise, enjoying snooping around her freezer a little, seeing what was kept in there. It was just a couple of ice cube trays, some frozen pizzas, half a box of popsicles, some chicken... but it gave him just one more glimpse into the everyday life of Pam (and Roy, but he tried not to think about that. Denial was best sometimes).

Jim brought their food into the bedroom, setting hers down on her nightstand, and then his down on the nightstand on the opposite side of the bed. “Mind if I join you, miss?” he asked.

“Certainly!” she giggled. He sat down next to her on the bed, on top of the blankets. The TV was tuned to USA, and “10 Things I Hate About You” was just starting.

“Ah, good movie,” he said.

“Oh, I know! So lame it’s awesome, right?”

“Totally,” he said.

They were quiet for a little while, eating dinner together and watching the movie. Jim had to force the realization out of his mind that Roy usually slept with Pam right in this bed he was sitting on. He did not want to think about that. He just wanted to be there for Pam, to take care of her and spend some time with her. He let his eyes wander around her bedroom. It was plainly decorated with blue walls, a wooden dresser, a couple of night stands, a bookcase, and a painting of a sunset on the wall. He looked at it, and saw Pam’s personality there.

“Hey, did you paint that?” he asked.

She looked at him, and then followed his gaze to what he was looking at. “Oh yeah. A few years ago.” She paused then. “I don’t even know if Roy knows that I painted that.” She looked into his eyes.

Jim continued to look back at her. “I don’t know how he could not know. It’s got your personality painted into it.”

Pam’s eyes flitted away from his and she looked pained for a moment. He hadn’t meant to prod the your-fiance-is-inattentive bruise. “It’s beautiful, Pam.”

He was rewarded with her smile- the one that lit up her whole face. “Thanks.”

*** 

As the evening wore on, Pam and Jim kept inching closer and closer to each other until she was eventually leaning her head against his shoulder. They'd finished mocking “10 Things I Hate About You”, and then made small chit-chat for the next hour or so. They slid into their flirty banter that they were so accustomed to, until Pam got serious again.

“Jim.”

He looked down at her, and her head was still resting on his shoulder, but she shifted so that she could look up into his face. “Thanks so much for everything today.”

“It’s no big deal…”

“No, it is a big deal. You took care of me, and took my mind off of being in the hospital, cooked me dinner… and now here you are, just spending time with me. You could have gone home the second I got settled in, but you didn’t. I’m glad you’re here.”

Jim kissed the top of her head, and then heard her sniffle a little, getting emotional. “Alright, I think someone’s a little overtired."

“Mm,” she answered and then sniffled again.

She'd had quite a day. Jim imagined that getting hurt in front of a whole bunch of people, and then having to spend the whole day in a hospital to find out that you have a broken bone could take its emotional toll on anyone.

Jim began to shift, ready to get off the bed. “Okay, well, I’ll let you get some sleep.”

She reached out and grabbed onto Jim’s arm before he was fully off of the bed. “No, Jim, stay?”

“Um…”

“I just, I need company. If that’s okay.”

Jim couldn’t say no to that. He sat back down on the bed, and she leaned her head back against his shoulder.

“Are you sure you don’t want to lie down?” he asked.

“No, I’m comfy like this,” she said.

“Okay.”

*** 

Pam had been quiet for a while, and Jim assumed she was asleep until he heard her voice quietly. “Ugh, I hate those shoes.”

Jim almost started laughing at her non-sequitur. “What?”

“Those stupid shoes I wore today with the heels that broke my ankle and my favorite teapot.”

“Shh,” Jim whispered, rubbing her shoulder. “Your ankle will be as good as new in a few weeks, and I’ll get you a new teapot.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he said.

“Thank you.”

*** 

Jim awoke confused and disoriented. Then he looked down and saw Pam asleep on his shoulder. A look at the clock told him it was 1:00 AM.

He reached for the remote to turn off the TV. As he did so, Pam awoke. “Hey, get under the covers,” she said, sleepily. 

“Pam, I don’t think that’s the best--,” he began.

“Jim, please? You'll be more comfortable,” she murmured. 

He thought about it for a second and figured that she was wearing clothes, he was wearing clothes, she had a broken ankle...and a fiance. What could happen? So he turned off the lights, and got underneath the covers with Pam. She immediately snuggled up against him and laid her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her and kissed her forehead. He was surrounded by her scent everywhere.

“Goodnight, Pam.” He whispered.

“Goodnight, Jim.”

***

Jim was awakened in the pale, dim light of pre-dawn by a gentle, warm pressure on his neck... and then again on his jaw. He cleared his throat, wiped his eyes, convinced he must be dreaming because that could not be Pam's lips resting beneath his ear.

"I can't sleep," she said sleepily. "Ankle hurts." Her voice, muffled against his skin, vibrated through him.

"Um, do you need another pain pill?" He didn't know what else to say, really. Just wanted to make sure she hadn't become confused after getting some sleep, thinking he was Roy.

"I just took one. It's not working yet," she whispered, kissing his neck once more. Wow was the only word registering in his brain at that moment. He looked over at her, and he could see from the look in her eyes that she knew exactly what she was doing. She reached for him, ran her fingers through his hair. His resolve was fading quickly.

"Pam, we can't..." he began weakly, but she held his face in her hands, leaned in, touched her lips to his. He was lost in their kiss, slow, languid, sweet. When she pulled away, he drew her whole body closer, careful not to jar her and hurt her injured ankle, and their lips met once more.

"Jim..." she murmured against his lips.

"Mmm?"

"You're such a good friend, Jim," she said between kisses, her lips lightly nudging his with her words. "I l-- You mean so much to me."

It was like at once standing under a freezing cold shower head and being set on fire. He pulled away immediately. "I can't--" he began to sit up, to make his retreat.

"Jim." She reached out and gripped his wrist.

"Are you leaving Roy?"

"What? I--"

"No, Pam. I can't. I can't do this with you if you just plan on going back to him when he gets home."

She looked down at the blanket, silent.

He sighed. "I have to go."

This time, she didn't try to stop him.

***

Things at the office between Jim and Pam were strained for the next few weeks. They didn't speak unless it was absolutely necessary, there were no exchanged looks of humor during meetings, and Pam's jellybean container remained entirely too full. After about three weeks of non-communication, Jim received an e-mail from Pam:

From: pam.beesley @ dunder-mifflin.com
Sent: January 23, 2006 11:16:01 AM
To: jim.halpert @ dunder-mifflin.com
Subject: I'm sorry

Jim,
I'm so sorry about what happened between us that night. I want to go back to being friends. I miss you.
-Pam

True to form, Pam artistically avoided the real issue. And also true to form, Jim took what he could get. If she wasn't ready to confront the feelings between them, he couldn't force her, and he'd almost gotten used to that fact by now.

***

The next morning when Pam came into work, disappointed because Jim had never replied to her e-mail accepting her apology, she noticed a large white box on her desk in front of her computer. On it was a note that said, I've missed you too. --Jim. With her mood instantly improving, she smiled and opened up the box, finding a green teapot inside- a replacement for the one she'd broken when she broke her ankle. She looked over at Jim, who was glancing at her from behind his computer.

She got up to meet Jim at his desk. "Hey, you want to have some tea with me in the breakroom?" She smiled and displayed the teapot.

"Sure," he said, smiling and looking forward to catching up with what he'd missed in her life over the past few weeks.

"So, how much do you miss your crutches?" Jim asked as he held the kitchen door open for her. Her laugh rang out just before the door closed behind them.

And just like that, things went back to the way they always had been and probably always would be.



PuffingNoise is the author of 41 other stories.
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