The next morning was a sunny one, and the Scranton branch – for once – looked relatively happy as they stood in the parking lot, all in their surprise shirts and surrounded by luggage. True to what she’d mentioned the day before, Kelly was wearing a much-altered bubble gum pink version of the shirt; shortened (both in the sleeves and the torso) and with a deep V cut into its neckline. It was also bejeweled to the point that the bright sunshine put one’s future vision in serious jeopardy if he happened to look her way. The only face missing among the crowd was the one belonging to their boss.
“When do you think Michael will get here?” Pam asked as she tucked a curl behind her ear. Jim shrugged.
“No idea. Do you think we’re taking another ‘party bus’ to the airport?”
“We’re taking a party bus?” Meredith asked, hurrying over. Jim’s eyes widened.
“No. I mean, maybe. I was just…hey! Dwight!” he interrupted himself, calling out to his deskmate who was strolling by. Dwight stopped and looked up from his clipboard.
“What?”
“Do you know when Michael’s gonna get here?”
“No. Why?”
“Well, I think everyone’s getting a little sick of standing out here and we’d like to know what the plan is.”
“You mean you don’t know what the plan is?”
“Why would I?”
Dwight arched an eyebrow and started to grin. “As Michael’s number two you should be privy to that sort of information, shouldn’t you?” he goaded.
“As Michael’s best friend you should know where he is.”
Dwight’s glib smile turned slightly worried. “That’s true.”
“So where is he?”
A long pause. “I don’t know.”
Jim gave the camera a happy jim, but he and Dwight both learned Michael’s location together, because at that moment he came tearing into the parking lot. He stepped out of his car and smiled.
“You guys all waited out here for me?” he asked. He received several nods and grinned at the camera. “What a warm welcome! Gotta love being loved. Well,” he started, clapping his hands, “are we ready for vacation or what?” A semi-enthusiastic cheer answered him. “Me too! I can’t wait to leave - only…five hours to go!” he said, checking his new watch, then displaying it for the camera. “Mickey, of course. Only appropriate.”
There was a long silence. “What do you mean, ‘only five hours’?” Oscar finally asked.
“The bus’ll be here at two. Our flight leaves at four.”
“Why did you tell us to come at the regular time?” Phyllis wondered.
“Yeah, what are we supposed to do til two?” Kevin asked. Dwight glared at him.
“Work, of course.”
“Oh hell no,” Stanley muttered. Michael chuckled and pointed.
“Will Smith! Good one, Stanley the Manly,” he congratulated him. Stanley gave him a look and headed toward his car. “Wait, where are you-”
“I’ll be back at two.”
“But until then-”
“Two.”
Michael looked flustered for a moment then forced another smile. “No biggie. I think he requested this morning off anyway. See ya, buddy!” he called, and was answered by Stanley’s car door slamming. Michael pointed toward the door. “All right, party people, let’s go!” He headed inside.
“You heard Michael: inside, now,” Dwight added unnecessarily, waving his clipboard in a herding fashion.
----
Dwight: (in the hallway, in front of the elevator) Although I hear they have an entertaining Star Wars ride, Disney World wouldn’t be my first choice of vacation destinations. First would obviously be Deutschland – that’s Germany to you – followed very closely by New Zealand, where I would take the Lord of the Rings tour. If I had to pick somewhere in Florida, it would be Universal Studios. But not until the Harry Potter attractions open next year. (Dwight leans in, holding up his clipboard.) I’m not going on this trip for fun, anyway. Michael will need someone to keep track of important details and ride herd on these…people. Sure, Jim should be doing it, but everyone knows how well he handles responsibility. (He pauses, then shakes his head. ) Not well at all.
----
Jim, Pam, Darryl and Kelly were the only ones left in the parking lot. All four stared at the luggage the rest of their coworkers had left behind. Jim looked to Darryl.
“Is it okay if we put this stuff in the warehouse for now?”
Darryl nodded. “That’s cool.” He grabbed the two closest suitcases. Kelly kissed Darryl’s cheek.
“Awesome! Bye honey!” she chirped, then bounced off. She spun at the door. “Just be careful with the smallish one,” she instructed, pointing. “That one has all, like, my most important stuff in it.”
“What the hell’s in the other six, then?” Darryl muttered. Jim bent to pick up a camouflage bag and nearly fell over. He frowned at the offending duffel.
----
Jim: (in the parking lot) I’ve never been totally sure what the TSA people may or may not find suspicious when they check your bags. (He raises his eyebrows. ) But I’m pretty sure if they opened Dwight’s duffel bag they’d be more than suspicious about all of it. As I’d like to actually be allowed to get on the plane, I hid that bag in the warehouse.
----
Five hours passed less quickly than usual – in other words, agonizingly slowly. The long wait was ended by an excited cry from Michael.
“The bus is here!”
Just then Stanley entered, carrying a McDonald’s cup. “Just in time,” greeted Jim from his usual stance at Reception.
“Oh good,” Stanley replied drily.
----
Stanley: It’s a free vacation, and I’m gettin’ paid. You don’t pass on that. Even if Michael is going, too.
----
“To the bus!” Michael directed, then jogged out the door. Everyone began heading the same way. Andy had his arm tightly around Angela, which she appeared none too happy about. Jim caught Dwight watching them.
“Nice shorts, Andy,” he said, nodding toward the bright, plaid bottoms his coworker wore. The tiniest of smiles snuck onto Dwight’s face.
“Thanks Tuna. Had to run out and buy a few new pairs to match the shirts but, you know, gotta be stylin’. Make the little lady proud.” He smiled and squeezed Angela even tighter. She, in turn, scowled harder. He tried not to notice as he tipped his sunglasses off his head and over his eyes.
“Nice shades too,” Jim added. Andy nodded.
“Thank you again, sir.”
“Big Top Gun fan?”
“Abso-fuuu…riggin-lutely,” Andy corrected himself mid-word, glancing at Angela nervously. Her scowl stayed firmly in place.
----
Andy: Yes, I have been to Disney World before. My a capella group, Here Comes Treble, went to the national finals there my sophomore year at Cornell. It was fun - and we took ninth place, by the way. (He looks impressed with himself. ) I think this trip’ll be great too – kind of like a pre-honeymoon for Angela and I. (His jaw clenches slightly. ) Granted we’re not rooming together…
----
Angela: No, I am not sharing a room with Andy, and yes, that is by choice. (She sits up a little straighter. ) I don’t care what Jim and Pam or Darryl and Kelly do. It’s inappropriate. (Angela fiddles with the end of her ponytail. )
----
“Let’s go, ladies! Move it!” Dwight was instructing at the front of the bus, while Darryl, Kevin, Jim and the bus driver finished loading the luggage into the storage area. Michael stood off to the side with Holly.
“I hope you guys have a great time,” she said.
“Oh we will.” Michael took a step closer. “Look, I’m really sorry I gave away your trip to Darryl.” He stepped closer. “I tried to get one more package for you but they were like Nazis about it,” he murmured, glancing at the camera nervously.
“Oh it’s fine, don’t worry about it.” Holly attempted a smile.
“Why don’t you just take the rest of the week off and come down anyway?” he suggested.
“Um, that probably wouldn’t be a good idea – I mean, I just started here a couple weeks ago.”
Michael sighed. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” He looked at her for a moment. “Well, you’ll be missed. By me- and, y’know, everyone. All of us.”
Holly smiled again, this time genuinely. “Thanks. I’ll miss you too.” A pause. “All of you.”
“I’ll bring you back a souvenir – maybe some Mickey ears?”
Holly nodded. “That’d be great.”
“Okay.”
“We’re all set, Michael,” Jim called from the bus door.
“You’d better go,” Holly said, folding her arms. Michael nodded.
“Yep.” He walked to the bus, but turned to her again when he reached the door. “And hey, if you change your mind, you know where we’ll be.”
“I do. Have a safe trip.”
Michael gave her one last smile and boarded the bus. Moments later the door shut and the engine rumbled to life. Holly waved as the bus slowly pulled out of the parking lot. She sighed, flashed a quick look at the camera, then headed back into the office.
----
“Know what I think it’s time for?”
“What, Michael?” Dwight asked eagerly from his seat next to him on the bus.
Michael waited a long minute for more of a response but got none. He frowned momentarily before a toothy grin tackled his face again. “An old-fashioned bus trip sing-along!”
“Yeah!” Dwight agreed heartily.
The rest of his employees added their silence as response.
“Come on, guys, we did it last time – beach day, remember?” Michael prompted them.
“What do you want to sing?” Phyllis asked kindly.
“Oh, um, whatever,” Michael answered, looking taken off-guard. A second later he clapped. “I got it, I got it: It’s a world of laughter, a world of tears-”
“NO!” was the bus’s improvised next lyric.
Michael frowned again. So did Dwight.
“I don’t get it,” he said, leaning toward Michael. Michael looked at him with equal parts disbelief and disgust.
“How can you not…? Ugh. Dummy,” he muttered.
----
Dwight: (outside the airport, looking confused) Seriously…what song was that?
----
Dwight stared into the empty cargo hold of the bus in frustration as the last bags were loaded onto a luggage trolley. “I’m missing a bag,” he reported, then glared at Jim. “Where is it?”
“What?” Jim asked.
“My camouflage duffel bag.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes you do – it was out in the parking lot with everyone else’s bags this morning.”
“So?”
“So, you moved all those bags. You must know where it is.”
Jim nodded. “It seems that way.”
“So where is it?” Dwight pressed impatiently.
“No clue.”
“Jim…”
“What was in it, Dwight?” Pam asked.
“Not relevant, Pamela.” He turned back to Jim. “Where is it?”
“It is…not here.”
“I know where it isn’t. But where is it?” Dwight fumed.
“Somewhere other than here?” Jim guessed, his eyes twinkling.
“Yes.”
“Okay then.”
“What?”
“Mystery solved.” Jim jimmed for the camera, then headed into the airport with Pam before Dwight could reply. Dwight did what could best be described as a perfect impression of a suffocating fish before he stomped off after them.
----
Jim: (standing near the ticket counter, grinning impishly) You’d think I’d get sick of it after a certain point, wouldn’t you? (Jim shakes his head as he walks out of the shot.)
----
Kevin was nodding slowly. “Nice,” he ruled. He turned the page of Maxim’s Hot 100 issue. “So hot. Also hot.” He turned the page again. “Oh man,” he breathed. A sigh issued from the airline seat next to him.
“You realize they’re all ‘hot,’ right? That’s the point – it’s the ‘Hot 100,’” Oscar stated flatly.
“I like agreeing.” Oscar sighed and attempted to return his attention to his copy of The New Yorker. Kevin turned the page yet again. “Oh man. Hottest yet.”
“Why are you reading that, anyway? Didn’t it come out months ago?”
“So? Jealous?” Kevin asked, chuckling.
“Hardly.”
“Right.” They were quiet a moment, then Kevin tore a page from his magazine and handed it to Oscar. Oscar glanced at the page – a half-dressed male model advertising God only knew what stared up at him lustily. Oscar gave Kevin a blank stare. “You can keep that,” Kevin assured him, grinning.
Oscar sighed again.
----
An hour later and three rows up Pam shook her head in wonder. “What?” Jim asked, removing one of his earbuds.
“This book is…terrible,” she mused, sounding almost pleased.
“What are you reading?”
“Nothing.” Pam shifted as much as a seat on an airplane allowed.
“Nothing is pretty bad, I agree.” Jim grabbed for the book before Pam could react. “What’s with the cover? Did you win it at bingo?”
“My mom made that!” she cried, laughing and reaching for her stolen read.
“Are you reading some trashy romance novel?” Jim pulled off the fabric cover and a huge smile lit up his features. “Wow, Beesly, really?”
“Shut up – give it back!” she hissed.
“Flowers in the Attic? I never pegged you as an incest fan, Pam.”
“That’s only at the very end. Give it back,” she pleaded, glancing around nervously.
“Please tell me you didn’t pay full price for this,” he said, laughing. Pam shushed him again, then pouted. Jim handed the book back, still chuckling.
“I bought it at the Goodwill last week. I wanted to see if it was as bad as I remembered,” she explained with as much dignity as she could muster as she hurriedly replaced the fabric cover.
“Sure.”
Jim was still grinning when Pam stared at his removed earbud in confusion. “Are you listening to George Michael?”
Jim’s eyes widened momentarily as he fumbled with his iPod. Before he could change the song Pam popped the bud in her ear. Her mouth formed a delighted O which she shared with the camera. Jim glanced that way too and clicked the wheel on the device. “It’s a vacation playlist,” he explained, his tone mirroring her pathetic one from a moment earlier as he took the bud from her ear.
“Uh huh,” she agreed lightly, returning to her book.
“You’re supposed to put a few guilty pleasure songs on it.”
“Sure.”
“It’s a rule, Beesly. Look it up.”
“Oh I will.”
“In your incest book?” He grinned at her, then the camera.
“I hate you,” she said, looking at neither him nor the camera.
----
“We made it!” Michael announced to the camera near the luggage carousel, holding his arms wide. “Beautiful, sunny Orlando, Florida: a great place to escape snowy Scranton!”
“There’s no snow in Scranton right now, Michael,” Dwight pointed out, eyeing his boss momentarily before returning to his intense watch over the rotating luggage.
“I know that.”
“It’s almost June.”
“Yes, Dwight, I know.”
“It was almost eighty-five degrees today-”
“Will you shut up? God, you are so annoying--” Michael spat before starting to point. “That’s one of mine,” he added, pointing at a blue suitcase.
“Got it,” Dwight replied, shoving a few travelers out of his way.
A few feet away Phyllis was on her cell phone. “Okay, Bobby. Just wanted you to know we made it here safe. I’ll call you later.” Phyllis listened for a moment, then smiled and nodded. “I love you too. Bye bye.” She closed her phone and shared her smile with Pam. “Bob Vance. He wanted to make sure we got down here okay.”
“That’s sweet,” Pam replied, grinning too.
“You and Jim will be the same way when you’re married one day.” Phyllis patted Pam’s arm and stepped closer to the carousel. Pam’s smile wilted noticeably as her eyes darted toward Jim, who was standing with Kevin at the carousel. She then caught the camera watching her, reached up to finger her necklace and quickly went off to join him.
----
Phyllis: (standing in front of one of the airport’s huge windows, her head cocked to the right) Of course I was sad Bob Vance couldn’t come – if it wasn’t such a busy time of year he would have taken the week off. He gave me the name of the store he bought my perfume from, though, so I really hope I can get up there. I’m almost out. (Phyllis smiles more suggestively than one would’ve thought she could.) Bobby really likes that scent.
----
As the Scranton travelers grabbed the last of their bags, Michael pointed at a short brunette in Rivers Cuomo-esque glasses and a black polo emblazoned with Mickey Mouse. She was smiling and holding a large sign reading WELCOME DUNDER MIFFLIN EMPLOYEES! “Troops! Over here!” Michael called out, jogging over to the young woman.
“Hi there! I take it you’re from Dunder Mifflin Scranton?” she guessed, lowering her sign. Michael nodded.
“Yes indeedy! And you must be our escort?”
“I am!”
“You look like you’ll guarantee us a good time – aaand that’s what she said,” Michael replied, chuckling. Kevin snickered too as Pam and Jim gave the camera matching looks. To her credit the woman only blinked.
“Um, yes! I’m Judy, and on behalf of the Walt Disney World Resort let me be the first to welcome you!” she greeted the group, managing to keep her smile. She was greeted in turn with a few hello’s and hey’s.
“Well, I am Michael Scott, and on behalf of Dunder Mifflin Scranton let me be the first to welcome you to the coolest gee-dee group of people you’ll ever meet,” he said, regally gesturing to his employees. Judy’s eyes widened slightly, but she only nodded.
“Well, thank you. Very much. I’ll be serving as your guide and liaison for your trip, so whatever you need, any questions you may have, just find me and I’ll be glad to help.”
“Okay, great – hey, I have a question…found ya!” Michael cried, grabbing Judy by the shoulders. The camera caught Jim shaking his head slowly. Judy looked at Michael nervously but covered her loss of composure with a forced laugh.
“Uh, okay, what’s your question?” she asked, casually attempting to take a step away from him. Michael’s smile faltered.
“I didn’t really…I was just…it was a joke,” he finished in a mumble. Judy eyed him for a long moment then turned to the rest of the group.
“Okay then…well, are you ready to board the Magical Express and get checked in at your resort?” she asked, eyebrows raised. The Scranton branch responded with rare genuine enthusiasm and she found her smile again. Michael glanced at the camera in surprise. “Excellent! Then follow me!” She turned and started down the corridor.
Michael was giving the group an angry, slightly hurt once-over, but quickly cleared it away with a shake of his head. “Follow us!” he said, then caught up with Judy. “You really got them pumped up,” he said to her.
“Well, it’s hard not to get excited when you’re going to Disney World – at least that’s how I’ve always felt,” she stated cheerfully.
Michael flashed a dubious glance camera-ward before looking at Judy again. “Yeah, well, maybe. Don’t get too used to it – they were just being nice,” he told her.
“Oh.”
“I mean, they never respond to me like that,” he added.
Judy flashed her own look at the camera. “Huh,” she said diplomatically.
----
Michael: (standing with his arms folded in front of a bus with Disney’s Magical Express printed along its side) Oh sure, Judy’s nice enough. She seems a bit young to be in charge. Kind of dorky-looking. Not much of a leader. I mean, yeah, everyone was nice to her and listened, but I think they just feel bad for her. Want to make her feel included. (Michael shrugged. ) I’m not sure we even need a guide; I know plenty about Disney World. Captain EO, Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride, 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea – I know all the best rides.
----
Dwight: (seated in the front of the bus, one eyebrow raised) Judy said come to her with any questions we had and she’d have answers. Naturally I asked where Walt Disney’s cryogenically-frozen head was stored. She said that was an “urban legend.” (He shook his head smugly. ) Didn’t take long to discredit her.
----
The Scranton branch was assembled in the lobby of Disney’s Pop Century resort, most studying the framed collages of pop culture items from various decades hung along the walls. Judy was finishing a discussion with a clerk at the front desk. Soon enough she came jogging back over. “Okay, we’re all set to head to your rooms,” she announced. “You’ll be staying in the 60’s section of the resort, which is just out this door – a nice short walk to hop on a bus to the parks in the morning.” She grinned as she got a few cheers. Michael scowled. “These are your room keys, but they’re also your park passes so keep a tight hold on them – otherwise we kick you out,” she joked, getting a lighthearted chuckle out of the group.
“All right, calm down. It wasn’t that funny,” Michael stated.
Judy glanced at him a moment. “So, I’m going to call off your names for and you can come get your cards, so listen up, okay?” she instructed, then began her roll call. Jim nudged Creed.
“The 60’s section - that’s gotta be pretty cool for you,” he said with a smile. Creed looked around at the somewhat kitschy décor critically before shaking his head.
“Ace, they won’t even get close to having it right,” he replied matter-of-factly.
----
Creed: (standing outside the 60’s wing; the shot pans the building, where the words Groovy, Tye Dye, and Peace Man can all be seen decorating the exterior. The shot then zooms in on Creed, who looks bemused. ) Not even close. Know what phrase should be up there? “Tune in. Turn on. Drop out.” (He nods all-too-knowingly. )
----
“All right, Dunder Mifflin, these are your rooms, all along this stretch,” Judy said, gesturing. “You all have your room numbers and your ‘keys,’ so you’re all set for the night. Now, the food court here is open til midnight, and Petals Pool Bar is open til then too, should anyone need a…how should we say, adult beverage after all that travelling?”
“Thank God,” Meredith breathed. Angela shot her a dirty look. “Oh can it, Angela, I’m on vacation.”
“Like that makes a difference,” Angela muttered.
“Okay, does anyone have any questions before I leave you be for the night?” Judy asked.
“Ha!” Dwight scoffed. Judy’s head whipped around. “Not for you I don’t,” he declared, making a face. Michael wore a proud look.
“Just ignore him,” murmured Pam, who was standing next to her. Judy put on a smile.
“I’ll see you all tomorrow at breakfast then – have a good night!” she said with a wave. A few put their hands up to wave back but Michael shook his head.
“Enough! God! You guys are obsessed with her!” he cried.
“I’m not, Michael – Judy is clearly an idiot trying to upstage you,” Dwight stated loyally. Michael smiled halfheartedly.
“Thank you, Dwight.” He turned to the rest of his employees. “Now, are you guys all set? Any questions? Jim?”
Jim shook his head. “If I didn’t have any questions for our guide, why would I have any questions for you?” he wondered.
“You wanted to save them for someone in the know, obviously,” Michael answered, glancing at the camera and mouthing ‘duh.’ Jim looked as if he were about to argue, then just shook his head. “You sure you’re good?” Jim nodded, which went unnoticed by Michael as he added, “That’s what she said. So you guys wanna go get a drink by the bar? Kick off the trip in style?”
“Yes,” Meredith answered before he could finish his question.
Michael looked less than thrilled but shrugged. “Okay, there’s one. Any other takers?”
“I’ll join you, Michael,” Dwight assured him.
“Right here, Michael,” Andy seconded, then looked at Angela. “Honey? Mind if I get a drink?” Angela replied with her patented cocked eyebrow. Andy sighed. “Guess so. Looks like I’m passing. Let me carry your stuff to your room.” Andy couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice. Dwight smothered a smile as the two walked away.
“Jim? Pam?” Michael asked, smiling hopefully.
“I think we’re going to go unpack, then maybe eat,” Pam replied. Michael chuckled.
“Right, unpack - more like un…dress.”
“Yikes,” Jim said, glancing at the camera as he picked up their bags. “See you guys in the morning.”
“Really? Okay…Stankley? Cocktail?” Michael turned to Stanley, who was already heading down the sidewalk.
“Good night,” Stanley said in response.
“I should go too,” Oscar tossed out quickly, following his roommate.
“Where’s Darryl?” Michael asked. “And Creed?”
No one had an answer for Creed, which seemed to alarm no one.
“Darryl went to put our bags in the room. It’s gonna take a couple trips. Tell him I went to the gift shop, okay?” Kelly requested as she trotted off.
“I’ll meet you there,” Phyllis offered. “Let me just put my bags away.” Kelly turned back and gave her a nod before resuming her journey.
“I’ll walk with you. I need to get some food,” Kevin told Phyllis. They too left.
Michael looked at those remaining, and the disappointment was painfully obvious as he took in that it was only Dwight and Meredith. “All right, come on,” he conceded, noticeably dragging his feet as he headed for the bar.
----
(The camera sneaks up on Judy, who is standing under one of the stairways, smoking a cigarette. When she notices the camera, she quickly hides her hand behind her back. )
Judy: I’m not really supposed to, uh…(she nods over her shoulder) while I’m on the job, you know…can you just cut this out? (Someone must give her an affirmative answer off-camera because she visibly relaxes and takes a drag off her cigarette. ) They seem…great. A really fun group. (A long pause. Judy purses her lips and narrows her eyes. ) You guys follow them all the time, right? Is Michael always like that? (She listens to the producer’s answer and she nods slowly. ) Well. Should be an interesting week then, huh? (She attempts to smile, but ends up taking deep drag instead. )
Author's Chapter Notes:
A nice long chapter to finish the set up. :)
Chapter End Notes:
Take a second to check out Kelly's improved shirt, Michael deciding the room arrangements, the book cover that prompted Jim to ask, "Did you win it at bingo?" and Jim's vacation playlist! And please let me know if you like this! :)
