Jim’s Perspective
There's an ache in your chest that you've become convinced is a heart attack. There's a dull pain in your stomach that could be an ulcer. Your entire body throbs in pain. And you realize this is what unrequited love must feel like. You're shutting down. And there's nothing you can do to stop it.
......................
It's kind of like bashing your head against a brick wall. The first few times hurt, but then the numbness takes over, and you can't feel the pain anymore. The texture of the rough stone against your bruised, broken skin is a welcomed change from the anguish you feel everywhere else. But it still aches.
.......................
The one and only fight you've ever been in was in the eleventh grade. You remember the solid feel of your fist crushing against the kid’s cheek, the instant relief in your gut, the frustration that lingered in the contorted grimace of your mouth. You wish the fight within yourself could have felt the same.
....................
It feels funny to smile so brightly when inside everything is so incredibly dark. The curve of your grin mocks the sharp edge of your pain, the smooth lyrics that tumbled from your mouth such a contrast to the rough words you really want to say. You wonder when it became easy to fake it.
....................
You've heard the words before, many times, to questions you've asked. "Can you do this?", "Can you do that?" A simple grouping of words, five letters of the alphabet, a conjunction, a single space. But never before did the words, "I can't" seem so remarkably complex. So devastating heavy. So infuriatingly complicated. So utterly... Painful.
....................
Pam’s Perspective
You've been pulled in 2 different directions your entire life. Mom or Dad, Graphic Design or Liberal Arts, and now, Roy or Jim. It isn't fair, but you've always made the right decision.
When you see his empty desk and your heart crashes up into your throat, you realize just how badly you were wrong.
.................
There comes a moment in your life where you realize that everything you ever wanted was everything that you couldn't have. But the scary part about it was that was completely your choice. You made a decision. You said no. You watched him walk away, you didn't stop him. And that was your own fault.
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The creaking sounds of the old apartment are as familiar as a warm body in your bed. You wonder when it became normal to fall asleep to their comfortable groans. You let them soothe you as the tears slide down your cheeks, as your heart beats furiously, achingly, wishing he'd just come home to you.
.................
You debate dying your hair black and wearing expensive suits. You briefly contemplate about having your cute cousin Frank pick you up from work to make him jealous. You go out with a guy that Kelly sets you up with, but you sit there imagining him sitting across from you, and you want him back.
.................
You watch them playing on the beach, and you adjust your bathing suit accordingly. It would be easy to play the game, to look sexy and beautiful with faux confidence. Except she’s there, and she’s innocent in all of this. But then there is a coal walk, and you want to change the future.
Story Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Sooo I had most of these just collecting dust on the hard drive of my laptop, and I decided to group them together to prove to myself that I could still write some angsty stuff. Not that I don't love the ooey, gooey sugary sweet fluff I've been writing lately, but it's nice to change it up :)
And sorry if I've been overwhelming the MTT board with all of my stories lately! For some reason, I've been feeling really creative recently :)
Again, I own none of these characters. But I wish I did!
And sorry if I've been overwhelming the MTT board with all of my stories lately! For some reason, I've been feeling really creative recently :)
Again, I own none of these characters. But I wish I did!
Chapter End Notes:
So. Angst. Good? Bad? Indifferent? Should I stick to fluffalicious fics, or was this OK? Advice and reviews are phenomenal :)
Also, I counted each and every one of these little paragraphs and they were all 55 words, despite what the MTT counter says lol...
Also, I counted each and every one of these little paragraphs and they were all 55 words, despite what the MTT counter says lol...
stjoespirit04 is the author of 25 other stories.
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