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Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.


She was very beautiful.

Her cheeks were tinted with pink, and leaves were tangled in her long red-gold hair. As she started to stand she could have been a pagan goddess rising from sleep, her form pale against the darkening sky, rain caught in her eyelashes and streaming down her face like tears.

“Wait,” I implored, pulling her back down to the ground and gathering her once again into my arms.

“Creed!” she giggled, squirming pleasantly under my hands. “C’mon, seriously, we have to get back!”

“We’ve got time,” I assured her. “We’ve got all the time in the world.” And I kissed her again, slowly.

“I guess we can wait a few more minutes,” she murmured as they broke apart. Smiling I wrapped an arm around her waist and wiped a smudge of dirt off her chin. The cool wet wind blew over us and I shielded her body form the cold as well as I knew how. The soil beneath us was surprisingly warm as we lay among the crushed young plants.

Like all spring storms, the scent that surrounded us was intoxicating, and at that moment I was sure that I wouldn’t forget it in all my life. The earthy smell of earth, rain, and pulverized beets.

Her chest filled as she breathed in deeply. “Mmmh… this is nice,” she said quietly. I’m not sure that she was even talking to me, she may have just been thinking aloud. I bent down to place a kiss just below her ear when –

“What is that?” she cried, sitting up so quickly that I was thrown from my place around her shoulders.

A terrible screeching filled my ears, and I knew that it was definitely time for us to go. A gigantic woman was barreling towards us, yelling at the top of her lungs, sprinting as fast as her swollen ankles and mountainous stomach would allow her to. Her mousy and unkempt hair flew out behind her shoulders; her thick glasses were slipping down her nose. She held a shovel menacingly in one hand and a flashlight in the other.

My companion let out a shrill scream and ran off into the deepening night. I had enough sense to grab our muddied clothes before following her, laughing hysterically.


I watched with satisfaction as the two of them disappeared into the dark. Leaning against the shovel I had carried with me I attempted to catch my breath.

“Hey, wait!” I heard someone shout behind me. My favorite nephew was tottering after me on his little short legs, puffing and panting. “Uncle… Schrute… said… you… shouldn’t be running!” he wheezed.

“I scared them off, didn’t I?” I teased him playfully.

“Yah, I guess,” he answered, looking forlorn. “I coulda got ‘em too, I just wasn’t running as fast as I coulda.”

“Maybe you can get them next time,” I told him, trying to look serious. “I’ve seen that boy before. He’ll be back.”

“Yah, I’ll get ‘em next time!” he replied more enthusiastically, and I reached over to muss his hair fondly. In my belly I could feel little Dwight kicking, and I prayed that he might grow up to be just like his cousin Mose.

WingWoman is the author of 5 other stories.

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