I fell in love with the receptionist her first day she just made my world she had that smile that awful, beautiful, amazing smile. It would brighten up somebody’s day from a mile away I was in love with her she was new and it took me weeks to develop the courage say hi to her. If only I’d come sooner I would’ve fallen in love with her even quicker she was everything to me and I was just a friend and a coworker of her’s.

I wanted her.

I wanted to spend the rest my life with her, and I don’t believe in love at first sight, but if that’s what love at first sight is, I’ve experienced it, I’ve experienced it so much. She was just so beautiful I finally talked to her. I asked her name. It was Pamela Morgan Beasley every day should pick up the phone and say “Dunder Mifflin this is Pamela”, Id love that she said Pamela instead of pam.

Days turned into the weeks weeks turn into months and eventually in December she was already engaged to a warehouse worker.

Roy.

Never ever did I like Roy. Not only because he took the woman of my dreams. He just had that look, that stare. You know that stare that looking into someone’s eyes and you see that past that past filled with hurt feelings and terrible intentions. He wasn’t right for Pam but I wasn’t either. I waited too long and I missed my chance.

That receptionist, she took my heart and she left me broken. Friends would find me crying in the middle of my kitchen floor. I was just a friend, God I hate that word “friend”. Like someone that’s  just there to help. There just a person you don’t mean anything to you they are just there to comfort you.

Every time I would think to myself that I meant something to Pam it would turn out that I just met less and less to her and it hurt me he cut me deep. I never wanted to be around. I didn’t wanna live. I didn’t want to see myself. I didn’t wanna talk anymore. I didn’t wanna tell jokes anymore. I just wanted to get out of this isolation. It might sound funny but food had no taste, it was like everything I eat just put me in an ultimate depression.

Everything that made me think of her. Sometimes I would sit there and Id think about the first day I saw her, and that smile that stupid smile that just sucked me in. I remember the day I cried, the day that I broke a poor woman’s heart thinking I had a shot with the receptionist. I told her she was nothing compared to Pam. I left her in tears just like me later that night. I went to Pam and I was going to tell her what I thought but evil spirits filled the stage. Something that still makes me shake. Words that would crush a mans soul. “Pamela Morgan Beasley will you be my wife “. I couldn’t stop the shaking. The thought of the woman of my dreams, the one that I love the most just in someone else’s arms.

I never had a shot and I knew I wasn’t right for her. As. much as I said that to myself, I still wanted her.

Casino night one of the most train wreck days of my life. My boss wanted to host a huge casino night in the warehouse and all I wanted to do was tell Pam on much I cared about her and how much I love her and even if she didn’t feel the same she just needed to know.

I told her.

 I “misinterpreted our friendship”.

I was living a lie. She wanted that amazing Roy. She wanted to leave me, Jim, just alone and leave me in the depression I was.

Then I kissed her.

I don’t blame myself. That receptionist, my wife and the mother of my two kids said she was in love with me too.

That silly,beautiful,amazing receptionist. Pamela Morgan Beasley. I love her with all my heart and always will.

-Jim Halpert