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Prologue 

“Yeah, I sure dodged a bullet there,” said Captain Jack with a smile. “She almost convinced me that we should get married, but luckily I got smart. Avoided that old ball and chain.” He grinned and punched Roy on the arm. “But you, sounds like you’ve been with your old lady so long - might as well make it official. Get her to shut up about it, give you some peace.”

“Yeah,” muttered Roy, frowning and turning away from the group. My old lady. The ball and chain.

Roy

Roy found himself stumbling down a narrow hallway. He was drunk enough to feel woozy, but not so drunk that he couldn’t think straight. Captain Jack’s words had hit a tender spot, a spot that had started to twinge earlier when he was talking to Katy. He should have known she was a cheerleader. He knew the type - he’d hooked up with enough of them in high school. Damn, those girls were wild. Bet Katy’s wild too. Bet she doesn’t mind going down....

He started to imagine Katy on her knees, those plump, red lips opening, and suddenly he pictured Halpert. Fuck. How did that guy get a girlfriend like Katy? He probably wouldn’t know how to enjoy a blowjob. Fucking asshole thought he was better than everybody else. Roy shook his head back and forth, sliding his hand along the wall to stay upright. What did Pam see in him? Her best friend, Roy muttered quietly in a mocking voice. Those two fucking deserved each other. Always standing back and laughing at everybody else. 

Then a beam of clarity shot into Roy’s drunken brain. He used to get girls like Katy, so why was he wasting his time with a ball and chain like Pam? He saw how Katy looked at him tonight, running her tongue around her lips and playing with her hair. She probably wished she was going home with a real man like him. Not that fucking limp dick Halpert. And Roy sure as shit wished he was going home with Katy. Not Pam, who looked at him like he was dirt and just laid there like a dead fish when they did it once a month or whatever.

Roy rounded the corner to the main hall and scanned the room. His eyes locked on Katy, standing by the wall alone, stirring her drink with a straw. Damn, he wanted to hit that. A sluggish current of guilt ran through him and he looked around for Pam. Through a window on the other side of the boat, he could see her standing at the deck with Halpert. Fuck that. He deserved some fun. With as much intention as his drunken self could manage, he made a beeline to Katy. Might as well see if the old Anderson charm still worked.

Pam

“Sometimes I just don’t get Roy,” Pam said to Jim, staring out at the dark water. Honestly, when Roy acted like he did tonight, Pam felt she didn’t even really know him. Snorkel shots? It was so immature. Why was Roy always the first one in line to do that stuff? Back in high school Pam thought he was impossibly cool, but now she wanted something different from the man she was going to marry.

Jim leaned on the rail beside her, looking out over the dark water. “Well, Roy and Katy sure seemed to have lots to talk about,” he said, turning to look at Pam out of the corner of his eye. 

“Yeah, well, he played football and she was a cheerleader. They’d be the perfect couple,” Pam laughed. Then she realized what she’d said and whipped her head around to look at Jim, her hand flying up to cover her mouth. 

Jim didn’t laugh the way she expected he would. In fact, he wore a strange expression. He looked at her intently and said in a low voice, “Yeah they would be. But where would that leave us?”

His gaze held hers, and Pam slowly lowered her hand from her face. She felt like something was happening, something that had been lurking below the surface for a long time. Everything inside her told her to back away, even while Jim’s eyes pulled her closer. With an effort, she shrugged. “I’m cold,” she said with a shiver. “I’m going in.”

Jim held her eyes for a moment longer, but he didn’t say anything. Then he turned back to the rail, watching the water as the boat moved slowly forward.

Pam made her way to the door with a feeling of relief, like she’d dodged something unpleasant. She didn’t want to explore that look in Jim’s eyes. It felt...dangerous. She stepped back into the room, and had the sense she’d been gone a long time. The music was loud and her coworkers were spread around the boat in seemingly random groups. Her eyes caught Roy leaning against the wall laughing with Katy. She took a step toward them and then stopped. Katy was laughing at something Roy said and then she leaned in to punch his arm and wrapped her hand around his bicep. Even from a distance Pam could tell that Roy was pretty drunk, and his eyes were locked on Katy’s chest. Their heads were practically touching. What was happening? Was Roy actually hitting on Katy right here in front of her and everybody from the office? Suddenly Pam felt her stomach start to churn from the drinks she’d had on an empty stomach, not to mention the rocking of the boat and the sight of her fiance with another woman. She turned and practically ran down the hall, searching for the ladies room and hoping to make it in time.

Jim

What a weird fucking night. Seriously, what had possessed him to call Katy and invite her on a date on a boat? And Pam, with her random little remarks that made him wonder how much she really knew about his feelings. He’d throw himself overboard if he wasn’t afraid that Dwight would strip naked and jump in to save him. 

He could be honest with himself about what he saw in Katy - after all, she looked just like Pam. And unlike Pam, she wanted to go out with him, although honestly he didn’t know why. Clearly he wasn’t her type. She was way more interested in dumb former football players who were supposedly engaged. He’d seen the way she flirted with Roy earlier, and Roy - that idiot - had flirted back. With Pam sitting right there, doing what she does best: pretending everything was fine.

He’d missed a chance to say something to Pam just now. But what would it gain even if he told her his feelings? “I’m in love with you Pam,” he’d say, and she’d probably just laugh and tell him how funny he was. Sometimes he thought she knew all about his feelings, and other times he thought she was truly oblivious. He wished he had some of that oblivion when it came to her.

He shivered, and turned back to look in the windows at the action inside the boat. Katy was leaning against the wall, a drink in her hand and a big smile on her face, and - Jim gave his head a shake to clear his vision - Roy was beside her, leaning over her and obviously enjoying her company. He’d known Roy to be pretty insensitive, but he’d never seen him openly hit on another woman. Where was Pam? He walked toward the door mindlessly and stepped inside. A wall of heat and sound hit him, his eyes searching the room for Pam. Roy and Katy seemed to only have eyes for each other, and his coworkers were all wrapped up in their own worlds, as usual. 

Jim didn’t stop to wonder that he could care less about Katy’s interest in Roy. He turned away from the crowded room and started down a hall, knowing he was looking for Pam and not even asking himself why.