“This is my treat.”

They were next on line at Burlington, holding the heavily discounted coats they picked out from the racks of the bargain-basement store.  

She was surprised to have found a full-length puffer that was pretty much identical to the one she already had, and while she couldn’t have described the regular coat the other Michael owned, she knew it wasn’t a double-breasted, slate gray, Italian cashmere, Hugo Boss overcoat in a size 46, no matter how much it was discounted.  Somehow, she convinced him to forego the ‘steal that you never get lucky enough to find here’ and go with the simple, black wool version that was a lot closer to the one that was currently draped over a chair back in his private office. She appeased him by allowing him to buy the discounted but still overpriced, rabbit fur lined leather gloves he 'absolutely needed to have' and for herself, found a colorful scarf and a nice warm pair of mittens that were much more budget friendly.

Shopping with Michael, as with almost everything else when dealing with him, was like being with a child. She mistakenly left him alone while she looked for her own items and panicked when she could not find him anywhere, forgetting briefly he was a grown man and not a little boy when she began to check the centers of circular racks where she thought he possibly could be hiding. Upon finding him outside the women’s fitting rooms, combing the discard rack, a pile of various garments piled over his arm, none of them coats, she forcefully ushered him back to the men’s outerwear section so to supervise the search for the one item they came in for. 

Feeling much like his parent as they shopped, she let him know when items didn’t fit properly, the Boss coat clearly did not, or were too extravagant, again the cashmere was a bit too much, or were womenswear; he took a liking to a suit left by the mirrors that she insisted was not unisex as he claimed and had to raise her voice to get him to put it down and stop wasting time.

She was pretty sure the gloves he found were women's too but with Michael's dainty hands they fit perfectly and she didn't have time to argue with him anymore so she kept her mouth shut.

What should have taken a quick ten minutes was nearing forty by the time they got to the registers where their roles reversed, Michael becoming the parent and Pam the child as he loaded her items onto the counter and pulled out his wallet to pay for the purchases.

Pam barely acknowledged Michael’s offer except to mumble under her breath, “this is absolutely on you, since this experience has not been a treat so far.”

Michael was a generous boss. He often indulged the staff with goodies in the breakroom and little surprises from time to time but because in this instance, where she blamed him for her current state of coatlessness, she didn’t consider his offer benevolent, but instead, obligatory.

She was appreciative, however that he suggested he would to pick up the tab before she would be forced to insist that he did.

She had no means to pay for anything. When they got down to the Dunder Mifflin parking lot an hour or so ago, they realized the procedural principles that affected time travelers and their coats also applied to her purse along with her wallet, cash, cards, and keys, as well as his car and just about anything else they didn’t have on their person when they made their journey.

Lucky for her she had a male companion that kept his keys and wallet in his pants pocket. Unlucky for her it happened to be Michael.

“Just don’t take the tags off,” he whispered to her as the next free cashier waved them over.

At the register Pam tried to make herself small as Michael made jokes with the girl ringing them up, getting no response in his attempt to make her react. Understandably so, when he offered to pay with his Chili’s loyalty card and then suggested that Burlington should have one.

“You know, buy 10 coats, get one free.”

He went on with his jokes, handing her next a frequent flyer card and then his library card, “how about we just borrow these?” before finally offering up his Visa to the stoic face across the counter.

A small fake smile came to her face at last. Pam was pretty sure it was just relief that with the credit card in her hands, she could finish his transaction and get him on his way.

Michael made some comment about feeling like a king whenever he shopped here, a sort of prelude to his next routine after she ran the card and handed it back.

Michael took the Visa from her hand and replied in the deep tone and mumbled speech Pam had come to recognize as his Elvis voice.

“Thank you, thank you very much”.

If she felt anything like a child with her father before, she completely did now, shrinking down even further with embarrassment at her pseudo-parent’s attempt to get a laugh from the millennial behind the counter. Pam rolled her eyes to the young cashier who she figured was a generation too young to know anything much about Elvis. Even if she did, she was apparently disinterested in even pretending to be amused by Michael or sympathizing with the somewhat closer to her age woman who was stuck with him.

That’s when Pam made the sudden connection the girl likely thought Michael was with her, like with her, with her. Her humiliation now beyond simply being about his bad jokes and impressions, the thought someone could think she was romantically linked to Michael was so mortifying she had to step away from him and the register.

Still in character when he got over to where Pam was waiting at the exit, switching me’s for you’s in the catchphrase he recited again as he handed over her new beige puffer coat.

She only hoped Elvis would not stick around for the rest of the afternoon as he often did once he made his debut. Nobody at the office much appreciated when he brought out the King, except Dwight because laughed at everything he did and Creed who claimed to have performed with the legendary performer, but none were quite as annoyed by the voice as Pam, who always had a hard time understanding the slurred cadence that marked his impression of Mr. Presley. It always made for a longer day when she had to get him to repeat himself over and over to be able to identify who the fax needed to go to or what to do with the contract he was handing her as he mumbled.

She knew they still had lots to do today before they had to get back with the car. If Michel/Elvis was sticking around, they would surely not make it back to the office in time. Lucky for Pam, Elvis left the building just before the two of them put on their new coats and did as well.

Donning their new outerwear, the tags tucked up into their sleeves, they returned to the parking lot and Michael’s Sebring which they’d driven from the office. Pam had suggested a cab, nearly insisted on it, fearful of what might happen if Michael were to look out the window while they were gone and think his car stolen. Michael maintained they could take it on their errands and get it back before it would be ever be missed.

Not wanting to waste time discussing the everything that could go wrong with his plan, she acquiesced, even knowing what a risk it was. Michael’s ability to stay on schedule was abysmal when he wasn’t in a time loop, now that he was, she could only imagine how warped his sense of urgency and timing would be.

In typical fashion, he was off to a running start in making them late by contending they still had time to go to lunch and started in the direction of Cugino’s, but she convinced him to scrap their original plans and they should just grab slices at Alfredo’s instead. Extra worried about arriving back before the car was missed and knowing it was the closest place, she didn’t even care that it was the absolute worst pizza in town. As hungry as she was it didn’t even matter, as long as she got something into her bellowing tummy.

Never had food tasted so good. Even their normally inedible slices were like manna from heaven as she scarfed down three of them, only starting to notice the cardboard-like crust and too salty sauce halfway into the third one.

Now that they were fed and appropriately clothed for the weather, it was onto the rental place to secure a means of getting around once the Sebring was returned to the office lot, hopefully on time. As they drove to the nearby Hertz, Michael talked of wanting to rent a sports car.

“Do you think they’ll have Porsches there?”

Engrossed in her own thoughts of how to survive the next two weeks, his question interrupted her internal frustrations. Seems this trip would not be a vacation. Sure, she’d get a break from answering phones and making copies but not from keeping Michael in check. She sighed before she answered him.

“I don’t know, Michael but don’t you think you should get something a little less conspicuous,” she began to lecture him again. “And cheaper. A 2-week Porsche rental is going to get pretty expensive.”

“Yes, but I’ll be getting two paychecks this week.”

“How do you figure?”

For the briefest of moments, she thought he might be onto something and began to calculate how much extra that might mean for the wedding, until she heard his reasoning.

“Two me’s, two paychecks, right.”

Nope, Pam was fairly certain that wasn’t how it worked. Might be nice if it did though, she could use the bonus, and she more than deserved it as compensation for time traveling with Michael.

But then again, she couldn’t be exactly sure he was wrong, time travel and all that went along with it was a new concept to her too and she hadn't quite figured out all the rules yet.

What she did come to understand at that moment was she was going to have to spend the entire journey to the past, in the company of Michael. Not only would he have their only means of travel—a mid level sedan, she managed to convince him was the reasonable choice, but he was the one with the credit cards to pay for things and the key to the office where they might just have to sleep.

More than any of that however, she also was going to have to keep her eye on him to make sure his actions in the present past didn’t wreak havoc on the past future.

Starting with tonight.

She was of the mindset to stay far away from the boat.

No good could come from trapping themselves on a vessel at sea with their officemates and other selves.

But it was all Michael talked about as they waited for the rental and she could see it was going to be hard to convince him otherwise.

In the end, the experience on the boat had been a good night for her. After three years, she had a date set for the wedding at last and since that time things with Roy were almost like they were in earlier days of their relationship, happy and promising.

Sure, the evening may have started out a little awkward, especially that moment early on where Roy embarrassed her with his normal disregard for her feelings. His comment about her being all artsy fartsy in front of Jim’s cheerleader girlfriend cut deep. But as always, she held in her hurt and brought forth the mask she was accustomed to wearing in mixed company. Finding Jim’s warm eyes and hearing him defend her when his own date laughed along with hers, her disguised smile widened to a genuine one as they silently poked fun at Katy through gestures and unspoken words.

As for Katy, she felt contrite thinking it now, but when she learned that Jim’s relationship with her had ended on the boat, she was relieved.

Not that she didn’t want Jim to have someone. The catch that he was, he more than should have been part of couple, just as she was. It was just she never felt Katy was right for him. She was too perky and simple and laughed at just about everything he said, even though Pam sensed she didn’t really understand or appreciate his humor, his charms and just what it was about Jim that made him the charismatic and exceptional person he was.

That night on the boat was when Pam truly saw how wrong Katy was for him. It was after witnessing her routing Roy on, both of them regressing back to the days where she was a Bishop O’Hara cheerleader and he was a Valley View jock—which for Pam brought with it haunting memories of tagging along with Roy to parties that were not her scene, watching him get shitfaced, rowdy, and overly flirtatious with the cheerleaders who still shunned her despite her status as his girlfriend. It was also the reason she suggested to Jim they take a walk on the upper deck.

Things got a little weird upstairs too. She remembered standing there, with all her insecurities pushed up to the surface, her disconnection to the man she was engaged to having just smacked her in the face again as he, Darryl and Katy reenacted scenes from the raucous high school ragers that she never felt comfortable at—not then and certainly not years later. It was that uncertainty, that reservation, that tremor she felt deep in her belly from time to time when she imagined her life with Roy, that escaped her lips as she confided to her best friend.  

Greeted with a strange silence, she knew she’d overstepped a boundary and made him uncomfortable. Girlfriends, that’s who you went to gripe about your fiancé. She should have asked Kelly or maybe even Angela to join her, but Jim, he was who she felt most herself with, aside from Roy of course. She tried to change the subject, bring the conversation back to small talk but it was too late.

A look she’d never seen before came over his face. She didn’t know what to make of it except it was making her nervous and self-conscious and suddenly that strange stomach twinge was back only this was different, it was less a pang and more like tiny little bubbles bouncing up against her insides, traveling down her spine and causing her whole body to shiver, but having nothing to do with the cold.

Reacting to the tremble she could blame on blustery, marine air, she used the frigid temperature as an escape ladder and was below deck again before the enigmatic sensation subsided.  And that’s when her night took an even more unexpected turn, when Roy, drunk but emotive with his love for her, had decided upon and announced to everyone the date they would finally become man and wife.

The days that followed were better than they had been for a long time as the afterglow of setting the date lingered. The stash of wedding clippings that were gathering dust for three years came out from the bottom dresser drawer along with the lingerie she hadn’t had on since before she wore his ring.

On the romantic getaway to the Poconos, the normal trip she was on before just before the strange travels of today, or two weeks ago, she was still very confused how time now worked, the sexy underwear was put to further use, more even than the skis they rented for the five-day escape.

Things with Jim were also back to normal. She’d missed him while she was gone and then again yesterday when Michael took his spot, but today or whenever it was that they’d begun to plan to their latest prank, they were back to being best buddies.

So, no, she wasn’t anxious to return to the night of the booze cruise where an additional Michael’s presence could potentially alter the events of that evening.

But it seems she had no choice. There would be no talking him out of it and where he went, she knew she would have to go to in order to babysit her boss and preserve history.

Her mind stayed focused exclusively on driving as she white-knuckled it back to the Dunder Mifflin lot, clutching the wheel at ten and two and keeping just under the speed limit the whole time, afraid to be stopped without her license or any ID at all.

It was only as she left the car behind in the lot and joined him again, this time in the rented Honda, that her apprehension came screaming back as they drove away in the direction of the harbor.