Post Casino Night AU where Jim goes to Australia, and Pam follows.
1 I've recently rewatched some episodes of The Office (thanks to quarantine) and it reminded me how mush I enjoy watching Jim and Pam's relationship. While hanging around the site I noticed this story, and I have to say I'm thoroughly impressed after reading it through.
Everyone here was certainly in-character, despite being in different places then they were in canon. Pam taking initiative was smart, knowing how passive and upset she was post-Casino Night, it'd be natural that she would be the one to pursue him and begin her "Fancy New Beesly" phase early. Jim having to regain some confidence in himself was necessary; her sudden presence and her confession of love is, to him, far too good to be true and he began overthinking everything. Naturally, their banter and established repertoire got them to a place of healthy communication and understanding. And while this was no doubt just good times, I'm glad you didn't shy away from necessary conversations like Roy or Stamford.
The added significance of certain elements both exclusive to this AU and in canon was really well done here. The caricatures, the Sydney attractions, and their teaming up for him to return to Scranton were all great defining moments of their relationship. I especially appreciated the reincorporation of the Casino Night dress and the cruise, as well as the redone art show scenario, keeping the tender Michael moment (which he definitely needed after Ryan humiliated him).
Speaking of supporting characters, the obvious standout here is Karen. I always liked Karen, and though I was happy that JAM got together in S4 Jim handled that relationship poorly. Her becoming friends with both parties was something I wanted to see, especially after "Lecture Circuit". Everyone else was... well, themselves. Kelly's portrayal was far too accurate, Ryan's motivations were well presented (I especially loved the Office Max bit) and though I prefer the "downward spiral" Jan, the professional and understanding Jan of this story (and S2) was great. I also liked that there was no violent Roy, he was never told what happened during Casino Night so why would he need to burst in and get pepper-sprayed? Besides, by the time the documentary would air he would have already found love again.
The final three chapters were my favorite, mostly because they were my favorite S3 episodes. The coal walk, the fountain, and the friendly competition between Jim and Karen were fun to see in a new context. And, with fics like these, I always like to imagine what would happen next in this alternate timeline.
Jim getting that promotion opens up a world of possibilities. Michael would just fully support him like the dad he is (and Jim in return), Dwight's dog-like obedience will mean he'll show Jim respect and everyone else would just be happy when he comes visit (besides Angela, but she's rarely happy). Knowing Jim, he will definitely play his cards right (even if he doesn't think he will) leading DM to further success, likely preventing the Sabre buyout (Though I could see Jo and Gabe as the faces of a competition between the two companies); a far cry from Ryan's "DM Infinity" plan, which I could see something very similar happening to Office Max and him being besmirched and arrested and then returning to his temp job. The ultimate irony. I can also see him uplifting others, like having Karen promoted to B.M. of Utica, and giving Dwight his due by convincing Michael to make him an official A.R.M. leading to both him and Jim making amends (just like Germany and Italy). I am surprised he's deciding to stay at Dunder-Mifflin full time, omitting the possibility of him joining Athlead(p) (though he could still be able to help fiscally). However, I can see him becoming more fulfilled and better happy with the company, especially after this promotion and with Pam. Speaking of which, she would truly fulfill her dream as an artist far sooner than in-canon, and with somewhere like New York which is an art zeitgeist, the world is her oyster. Though I can see her missing her Dunder-Mifflin family and catching up on all the gossip from Phyllis (because Kelly would be an endurance test). And post-S4 characters being introduced earlier like Erin (one of my faves) as the new receptionist.
I love imagining what remains the same, too. The "Gambler" and "Flintstones" singalongs, the trip to Niagara for the wedding (though *slightly* less chaotic and no Chris Brown), the weekend at Schrute Farms (resulting in Jim's heart-to-heart with the heartbroken farmer), Holly being transferred (which Jim would try to prevent), Michael's final Dundies and eventual farewell, and the infamous dinner party (my favorite episode as one could guess).
Apologies for the novella, I get like this with fanfics I genuinely enjoyed. Thank you for creating an interesting but realistic take on all these characters. Well done!
Never apologize for a long review. There's nothing better than seeing someone engage with and respond to the work you put into a story (at least, I don't think there is). This review was a pleasure to read.
I'm particularly glad you liked my revised S3. That was the part of the story I was least confident in, for two reasons: first, it could easily be seen as self-indulgent (it's basically just all the things I wish we'd gotten to see--I am myself a huge fan of Karen-as-friend), and second, I wasn't sure how much of the positive response to it was a result of people having simply gotten used to reading this story every day, as opposed to it actually being good storytelling. So to have you, coming to it after it's finished, telling me you enjoyed it was lovely. And yes, I agree with your takes on where this might have gone afterwards. I'll even add that founding Athlea(d)(p) might have been easier if Jim had had more executive experience (certainly people would have been more willing to invest!). Thanks so much for reading!
1 A very poignant, heartfelt fic with the right amount of realistic argument and fluffy reconciliation. I myself am writing a S9 fic (and taking a VASTLY different approach) and I think this would be a far more satisfying conclusion if done in-canon. Jim wouldn't be so stuck in his work that he neglects Pam but still following his passion, and Pam wouldn't feel being left behind or compounding herself with guilt if she pushes him to abandon it.
Well done!
Before Roy can propose to Pam, a new face shows up at Dunder-Mifflin.1 I've been following this for a bit and I like the concept! Pam has always been one who's had difficulties being assertive so I like how you're taking that and flipping it on its head; having it before the cameras arrive is interesting as well.
What I appreciate is that you didn't make Darryl and Lonny jackasses, since that could have easily been done given how they were written (Darryl less so, but he develops a lot as a character). As blunt and unfiltered as they are, they're right: Pam's a catch, and them seeing Jim hanging out with her proves that Roy should stop screwin' around, get off his ass, and prove his worth before she runs off with Jim.
I can relate to Roy on a tangental level in that I'm a simple guy who's content with being at home and eating TV dinners (then again I've been single all my life). But putting in some effort once in a while in a relationship is a given, and Roy's attempts to show Pam his love are severely lacking, especially with the proposal. It's as if putting in any type of effort is strenuous, when it really isn't. While Pam's complaints could come off as nagging to some, it's actually her pointing out not his flaws, necessarily, but his insecurities: he resists trying because he feels as if he doesn't need to (calling it gay for good measure), he feels threatened by Pam interacting with another male, and lastly he acts just like he did in high school. Her pulling out his old nickname (*brutal*, by the way) proves there's a refusal to move forward; if he can't move on from his 'glory days', neither can their relationship. That's where the cracks form and that's what she refuses to tolerate any longer.
Despite its title, I appreciate the fact that Jim hasn't had a major role yet. This seems like Pam's story so far, her accepting that she wants more out of life in general, not just Roy. Though Izzy eggs it on, Pam doesn't believe her interest in Jim is romantic yet. I mean, of course, it is, but what shakes her is that she's had Roy for so long that she always assumed he's what a romantic partner is like, which is immediately challenged when Jim walks in with his Halpert charm and takes her breath away. Their genuine connection is a strong foundation of their relationship and it's apparent in these chapters. An added bonus is, with Pam's sudden burst of confidence, she won't have a need to hide how she feels, and he wouldn't have to either. Steamrolls over all the angst.
Also, I initially thought that the manager would be another figure from her past but nope. 'Nother Halpert. Turns out that charm I mentioned is hereditary. Wonder how he'll play all this. A friends-and-family discount for JAM's first real date is my current working theory.
Finally, the dress? Blink-and-you'll-miss-it Casino Night nod? Nice touch.
Can't wait to see where this goes!
Author's Response:
Ok first off, wow, epic review 3V. Thank you. Yup you're picking up on just about everything I'm going for with all this. Roy is stuck in the past, can't move on, and feels threatened by any percived threat to his masculinity. Thus he lashes out. Pam does want to grow and experience new things. I once heard a concept that sometimes when one changes the course of their life even by 1 degree, eventually down the road, they'll be in a place they never thought they'd find themselves. This is a bit more than 1 degree for Pam, but the concept still fits. Make even a small change, like not put up with Roy, and the difference could be big.
I do like writing fiesty assertive Pam. She proves with Jim she's quick witted and smart. Thus can recall the old nicknames and the like.
Also glad you like how I've been writing Jim so far. This has been primarity about Pam and Roy, but we'll start to hear more from Jim going forward. Maybe Halpert charm skips a sibling or two. Tom and Pete in canon don't often come across as charming to me. But a fanon character who is often seen as the wise older brother kind fo guy, yeah, we'll go all in on charm with him. And don't worry I've got some good plans for Johnathan.
Well done on picking up on some of the quicker details, like the dress and everything. Thanks for such a great review. I'm glad you've liked everything so far.
1 “I’m protecting someone I love. That’s all you’ll hear from me.” ...DAMN, THAT HURT
There's that Lipton-Angela-Dwight-Oscar love square mess I've been waiting for! I really feel for Dwight here, the near pet-name got to me.
I love that Jim is pushing for evidence, despite all odds. Even Dwight, who he's already had a rapport with. But he's methodical, too, telling them the truth but with a easy, calming tone. It gains their trust, and thus, spills their secrets. No wonder he wants to write bigger stories.
Angela is SO in character here. Stubborness, denial, regret, deflection... excellent. Also, Oscar, being a Georgian native? Great, now all I can hear is his voice from the real "Murder" episode. "...We'got no greenbacks..." Curious as to what his deal is (outside of the obvious).
I mean... I dunno, I'm still pointing my finger at Phyllis, but we'll see. As I said, Toby is too outwardly weird to be the guy, Michael is well, Michael, and Jim? Okay, I'm going to say no, but I'm keeping that in my back pocket. Not letting that go, not completely.
Still, though, an amazing turn of events, can't wait to read more!
(How did you do this to me?)
I'll admit, I didn't do a review last chapter because it was such a gut punch and I don't do well with angst (though it was certainly very well-written). But this? Not only was this a happy ending, but it's an ideal one.
I kinda hate that we don't hear from the rest of them (besides Stanley, Phyllis, Toby and Michael) but I do appreciate Dwight and Angela getting together. I love the fact that you have her working for Michael, some things never change. And of course you're bringing Helene into it, of course you are.
The two of them reconnecting was very sweet, talking about everything that happened and how it affected them. I especially love them acknowledging that they know practically nothing about each other but want to pursue the relationship anyway.
This has been QUITE the roller coaster, but a fun one. Thanks for an engaging and well-crafted story, well done.
Okay, I didn't review last chapter because I was and still am busy, but after this... I have feelings. Good feelings, though.
I usually save this to the end, but... Erin. Holy balls. The motive, the method, the breakdown, it all makes sense. So much for my crackpot theories. That on top of her fate just tears my heart, the poor girl never had a chance, and it makes Packer out to be an even bigger POS, as it's something so in-character that no one thinks about. I love Erin in general so I'm just here hoping the best for her, like a reduced sentence or something. The moment with Meredith tugged on my heartstrings, as well.
And we finally get to Phyllis and Andy's deals. It's interesting you kept Andy/Angela for this, and her conveying the awkwardness of that tidbit was great. Michael and Dwight are, of course, a treat, and Michael talking over Stanley was a very subdued but appreciated S4 callback.
Toby: Undercover Cop was genius. As I read on, I figured he'd be a red herring, but not only does this contextualize his actions but also his treatment of Jim, the *investigative reporter*. Someone who could possibly sensationalize the situation to sell papers, an action he'd find repugnant. Question: considering he's the Mr. Greene of this story, *will* he go home and sleep with his wife?
Lastly, my favorite moment of stories in this genre is the culprit reveal, and Jim's poise, tact, and logical deduction was a great time. And, gotta admit, relieved it wasn't Pam. Hopefully they'll live happily ever after.
Like darjeelingandcoke, I look forward to Creed. Honestly, I'd love it if it wasn't Roy or Ryan and Kelly or any of them, just an explanation that is inherently Creed Bratton.
Can't wait to see how this wraps up!
Jim's taking a lot of this on. His mind is at too many places at once to focus on anything. It's great that he's there for Pam and they've confessed their feelings, but what now? He doesn't have the money or life that Roy sustained. He's just a journalist. He still lied to her, it was to protect her feelings sure, but what happens if she learns the truth? As much as I want to root for these two and hope they make it, there're too many indicators that this'll probably lead to a tragic conclusion. Hopefully justice and love will win in the end.
The Rope! This was a step in the right direction to be sure, but the fact it was in Pam's room, coupled with his notebook... Pam being the killer is a popular theory (since Jim deduced it at the start of the whole thing) but there's also the fact that there's more than a single killer thanks to Roy's drunken confession and eventual murder, but given all the motivations, the connections that they have not only with Packer but also with *each other*, the monumental risks of the public finding out their secrets... the person behind all this must be a master manipulator. Maybe performing some sort of "domino effect" or something to that effect by having them kill each other off one by one, leaving their tracks clean. So yeah, Pam could easily be screwing with his mind by placing clues by her, or the mastermind is doing it, *or* the mastermind is sending *others* to plant the evidence for them by threatening the multiple killers that they'll reveal of their secrets if they don't comply. So yeah, even though Toby couldn't possibly be the murderer at that moment, who's to say he's not pulling the strings? Or Pam? Or even Phyllis? I need to reread to see who *Roy's* killer could possibly be, and why they were blackmailed/motivated to do so.
Well-written as always!
It's back!
"He left out the details of Roy’s confession, not stupid enough to trust Toby with anything of value, information or otherwise."
This along with his total allegiance to Packer makes Toby still my primary suspect. Yeah, could be obvious, but it just makes sense given what we know. Giving Toby a backbone is an interesting choice, you're turning him into Lloyd Gross.
Guess Jim isn't the one after all given the final few paragraphs but who knows? Pam could be the one who killed Roy specifically (since he's the only one she would have a vendetta against), but I really don't want it to be her.
And then there's Erin... on my list. She's constantly getting yelled at by people and clearly comes from a sheltered household, and could end up snapping as a result. Maybe she wants to take out anyone disturbing the peace? Or maybe Packer was a father to her and she's taking out any potential suspects trying to find his real killer. Another reach, I know, but it's a possibility.
The Hide thing came out of *nowhere*, and a very neat touch tying in the factual events of a post-WWII America. A shame, he is the #1 heart surgeon in Japan. And Roy? Well, he certainly was a piece of work. Very like him to drink to forget. His descriptive death was sad to read, though, and it's interesting to see just how deep these connections to Packer go.
Another fun and gripping chapter!
First time catching one of these things in the nick of time!
Okay, first off, Creed? How *dare*. Where will we get our Creed Thoughts now? I kid, of course, but I'm just glad he's at peace.
The ending with Roy was ingenious. You captured his actions and mannerisms perfectly here. His absolute drunken state, the knawing guilt, relying on the man he probably already knows is trying to steal his fiance... it's extremely tragic. I'm not sympathetic to Roy, but I can't help but feel that he doesn't deserve what's happening... I'll get to that.
But nooo, Erin! Please! Look, I love Kelly too, but I will say if it was her, we're getting some premiere Ryan moments, and I am here for that.
Phyllis and Andy's revelations were welcome, the latter making complete sense given the canon character's history. He seems fine financially, but Nard Dog will be ruined if the Bernards' reputation tanks. He cares about status more than money.
Okay, the two are Pam and Toby.
Pam? The book and possibly manipulating Roy as she laid peacefully despite all that unrest and Jim is running ragged, probably doing this *for* him in the first place. Sweet Irony.
But... I dunno, Toby just seems more plausible. We now know absolutely nothing about him- heck, we know more about Erin now, the poor thing, and *he knows this house*. Inside and out. And with the book, he not only has an idea of Jim's thought process but also knows exactly which buttons to press, when, and how often. And returning the book is only gonna drive Jim even madder, now that he's crafting an extremely useful alibi in Pam.
Do believe Roy is a killer? Sure. But he's not one to pull the strings, especially not in the state he's in right now. He wants Pam framed and jailed, preventing him or anyone else-especially Jim-from having her.
Michael dogs on him a lot in canon, but if Season 4 has proven anything, he can act like a spineless coward when it comes to Pam, a mere infatuation. Obvious? Not too much, but definitely plausible.
And finally... Never change Dwight, never change.
The JAM moments continue to be wholesome and Roy continues to be a roadblock. And a powerful one at that.
I am LIVING for this Schrupert dynamic. There aren't any pranks, no, but Jim's reactions to Dwight and his methods - and Dwight being *correct* about some of them despite Jim's position - is everything. And the fact that Dwight believes Jim about the notebook proves that these two understand each other better than they realize. It's been a thing with these two since Season 3 (which I'm rewatching for my own story) and it shines here.
Admittedly I still kinda want my Jim theory to happen, even though this chapter indicates that that theory's dead, but I did forget to mention my other (and more plausible) suspect last review: Phyllis. From the over-the-top fainting to her conversation with Stanley to her questioning Dwight's methods of interrogation and investigation, she has secrets and DAMNING ones, especially we know the least about her (well, besides Andy, but it's hard to take him seriously, even in this). Like Angela, she is married into wealth, but we know how Angela is in this story and there is motivation there to have Packer dead. Phyllis's motivation remains to be seen. It also adds to the canon Phyllis, being a kind motherly figure one moment and then full-on Regina George the next.
An interesting turn of events for sure. Well done!
1 And the murderball begins to roll.
The Agatha Christie novel thing was great, and my word Dwight and Oscar were the absolute highlights of this chapter. The exchanges full of regret and resentment and bitterness are just so eloquently translated. The subtle callback to "Money" and the attitude towards homosexuality at the time does demonstrate Jim's truly empathetic nature, despite his fast-talking snark. Hell, you did this whole love square plot better than the show did.
So the guessing game:
I don't think it's most of the staff. Kevin and Erin are none too bright and total sweethearts (despite the former's gambling problem), Kelly couldn't care less, Creed just wants to be left to his own devices, Devon's not even around half the time, and the closest I can see is Ryan, but he wouldn't really have the motivation or the drive other than Packer's a prick (or his paycheck).
So my three possible culprits now are:
PHYLLIS: We know the least about Phyllis, and her actions indicate she's hiding something.
ANDY: We know even less about Andy, only that he's flamboyant, a singer, and went to Cornell (so, canon). He *does* come from big money, after all; the Bernard family is loaded and can definitely have some secrets, none of which may even involve him. And he is the one who found the next body, so he may be responsible for that murder alone?
Not JIM, not PAM... but TOBY. Who seeks to frame one or both of them for the murders.
-----
THE ALIBIS:
- Jim: I've mentioned before his silence towards Pam and his shock when seeing Packer's body being indications of guilt, but there's the fact that he would do *anything* for Pam, how the story has been pushed aside for Pam.
- Pam: His notebook was missing the next morning after he and Pam made love (more on that later), she was gone for a period of time this morning before she cuddled by his side, and if Jim is the genius this story paints him as, he guessed it was her from the start.
- TOBY: He's the HoH. He has access to every room in the vicinity, knows the place inside and out. Kevin is an easy target (the poor thing), as can the other staff... well mostly just Ryan, but that's because he's an ass.
He has barely interacted with anyone in this story, and it's always Jim, always antagonistically. He responded to Packer's death with "stunned silenced", which can easily be faked. He snuck around while the Schruperts were hot on the case.
He knows Laurels' estate inside and out. If anyone can trap all of them there, it's him.
THE NOTEBOOK:
- Jim: Someone is already onto him and has stolen it. Bear in mind, he flipped out when it went missing, and who knows what other info he had *besides* the profiles of the various guests and employees? He may have info of the house itself, he's gone for walks in the past.
- Pam: She knows how smart he is, and he can deduce how any one of them can be framed for their crimes. So she stole it, not to incriminate him but one of the others, giving him the story he's been looking for, a story that will give them a lovely life of luxury.
- TOBY: With the notebook, he now has access to Jim's entire experience in the house so far. And he can easily craft something out of that, something that will incriminate either party. Hell, Jim probably wrote some passages about Pam, giving him more ammo.
MOTIVATION:
- Jim: He wants to write the biggest story The Philidelphia Tribune has ever seen, to give Pam the life she deserves.
- Pam: She's so sick of Roy's bull, of Packer, of this whole damn life and wants to live a fancy new life with Jim, possibly on the run.
- TOBY: obviously his immediate crush on Pam. This probably isn't the first time he's seen her, either; Roy must've visited with Packer a lot and they get along despite the leverage he had over Roy, and Pam - of course - would always tag along. Her bright face and sunny disposition warmed his heart, but he hoped one day Roy can be out of the picture, and that nearly could've happened... but she wants Jim.
And if *Toby* can't have her, *then nobody will*. And both lovers will suffer for it. Because his bitterness and resentment took control of his life.
"'What kind of notes are you taking?'"
"He made an entry for Toby that included only that he was head of the house staff and not that he had sent a chill up Jim’s spine."
"Jim wasn’t sure where Toby’s sudden hostility had come from, but he didn’t care to stick around for more of it."
"Others were missing, too--Kelly and Erin, TOBY, PHYLLIS, Ryan, Michael--but it didn’t matter."
And this is the most telling:
"This outwardly benign line of questioning and the way Toby talked was starting to get underneath Jim’s skin and make him feel...unsettled. And not just because he didn’t know how to answer Toby’s query, but also because he suddenly was struck with the realization that these were people, real people, and he’d been sneaking around the house hoping to dig up dirt on them so he could jot it down in his little leatherbound book."
Jim and Pam seem to be too empathetic and kind to kill someone... but Toby sure isn't. It may be too obvious, but the plausibility and the motives are certainly there. This is why I believe if any of the three *actually* did it, Roy is that dead body Andy found.
My hope is that the ending isn't a tragedy (since that's not one of the genres) and that if either Jim or Pam really *is* the killer, the two have some sort of happy ending (which is legit my only concern right now because *it's well-deserved*.)
If you've ever read my writing, I'm a big fan of character studies, and you got me roped into a piece of fiction that meets that niche.
I can't stand it. Thank you.
Well done!
1 Reviewing both chapters here.
Having ALL the characters coming into the fray was a damn treat. The various reactions, Dwight's resourcefulness, Michael being Michael, it was just so good. Your writing continues to be exquisite, painting a word picture I can perfectly visualize in my head. And Devon being the driver? Great touch.
SCHRUPERT ALLIANCE. What a fantastic way to get these two wise-asses to work together. They make an awesome pair and it'll be great seeing them do more for solving the mystery.
I'm not really comfortable writing or discussing explicit sexual content, but I will say the passage was extremely well-written, and a true demonstration of their love. And hell yeah to the Fancy Bees! She's earned her happiness.
I have a new guess. Not Toby (too obvious) nor Michael (quite a reach on my part)... but JIM. Why? Because of these two sentences:
"She was part of one of the most defining moments of his life, if not the very most. He’d think of her every day until his very last one."
These two sentences, while innocuous enough, imply that JAM somehow won't end up together in this. Now one could think of Pam since it was explicitly written, but I can't help but believe her. She's so meek and only now is she speaking her mind. But Jim? Throughout this entire story, Pam has taken over every facet of his life. He cannot focus on the story because of her. And he wants nothing more than to provide for her. How would he do that? Make it big in journalism. How would he do *that*? By publishing a story so big it'll rocket-launch his career. And murder SELLS, especially with a group of people who both had ties to and/or despised the victim. Why doesn't he speak to Pam? Guilt. Why is he so shaken by Todd's body? Guilt. Hell, maybe *he* may have been the one to trap them there, to begin with! And Roy? Well, he's a GONER.
As much as JAM is an enthralling representation of love (hence this site's existence), love can make people do downright crazy things. And if my suspicions are correct, this story will crescendo into probably one of the MOST DOWNER ENDINGS I've ever read on this site.
Good Lord, I'm not a patient person, and this is messing with me in the best way. Hopefully, a resolution comes sooner rather than later. Well done!
And it begins.
Yeah, I'm with Dernhelm. Not saying it's definitely Toby but I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest. But I have another theory: *Michael*. I mean, he's financially dependant on him but they are shown to be the best of friends. Though I suspect there's something more to their personal relationship (and I'm curious if it involves Holly). I wouldn't think Michael would kill anyone else, mind you, he seems to be a standup guy. Packer, though? Nah, he'd kill the bastard.
Also, thank the GOD Lord the man's a corpse now. I mean, Packer was always an a-hole, but add the opportunistic business mogul layer on top of that and you have a truly despicable character. The fact that he was the one who hurt Pam was something I admittedly didn't see coming, and I'm curious where Roy was during all this. (Did he *allow* Packer to do this to her?) I personally think Jim's response is rather harsh, but it makes sense: he's hurt, he's confused, he has a million running thoughts, and the last thing he needs is to be strung along, especially considering the story he wants to cover that'll no doubt advance his career. Pam opening up about her reasoning and being brave enough to establish their love with the kiss was extremely satisfying; it gives her a moment of courage, something I'm sure she'll demonstrate more of. Her backstory is insanely upsetting, and I hope that there's at least some form of compensation for her when this is all over so her and Jim can have a modest living arrangement but still be in love.
A succinct chapter that's getting me intrigued. Well done!
I called Kevin's role, I CALLED it! Poor guy's just down on his luck and being taken advantage of because he's slow. It's like the canon but much more intense.
Stanley has more of a temper here than he does in the show. I love how you heightened his infidelity with the addition of Teri's CANCER, it makes him that much more unlikable. Not expected, but I dig it, especially considering it gives him a motive. His conversation with Phyllis only heightens things, and I wonder how she plays into all this.
A lot of neat interactions here. I love seeing Erin happy, that's always a treat. And even though we don't get a good look at Andy yet, you've got him down pat.
On Creed... this is the sanest he's ever been. The job you gave him was perfect, and his backstory is so friggin' sad. I hope there are some Creed-isms for us to enjoy soon!
I am LIVING for all these roles that the background characters have. Both Ed Truck and Jan a few chapters ago got me thinking of other characters and their place in this universe. Like Katy can be a successful singer on par with Andy (Amy Adams can sing and has played a role as such before) and Karen can be a fellow journalist working her way to the top, further hindered by her gender.
Ryan and Kelly's joke of a relationship is still there, and you're clearly having fun with it. Good.
Okay, it's Toby. I'm obviously taking a guess here, but he's only shown up twice and he makes my skin crawl. While in canon it can be argued that his creepiness is the result of his life being a wreck and him not doing anything about it resulting in his solemn, pathetic cadence, this Toby just frightens me. He's just... snippy with Jim for no reason. Maybe because Jim is everything he wants to be? And, oh dear Lord, I fear for Pam.
On that subject, I appreciate that you're making Jim hypervigilant when it comes to his job. He still has his aspirations as a big-time journalist, so he can't let Pam completely take over when he has a story to chase. That being said, their friendship is to the point where they trust one another, so at the very least he's made a friend. The ending moment of this chapter is pure feel-good fluff and it's an indication that they're gonna make it out of this and live happily ever after. Again, I could be wrong, but I know that I and the rest of the readership wants a positive outcome out of all of this.
This is the second time I've read a subtle "Casino Night" dress slip-in, nice.
This fic is so engrossing and dammit you got me, hook line, and sinker. I patiently await the murders!
1 I'm gonna sparse out my reviews with multiple chapters, so I'll cover what I've read so far.
First off, Dwight/Oscar/Angela/Senator Lipton material. I knew it was gonna be there from Chapter 1, but I love how you did it. The fact that both Lipton and Oscar both have a position in government makes the dynamic all the more crushing for Angela, and her bitter resentment towards Dwight contributing to Lipton's campaign is something I didn't expect. Appreciate the Angela/Andy nod as well. Jim's immediate annoyance with Dwight fits with his character and him and Pam bonding over his intricacies makes their story feel straight out of The Office.
Speaking of which, this is a JAM story through and through and I love their portrayal. I think you've accurately translated how one would conversate during this time, and seeing all of these familiar lines and moments executed differently is interesting to see. Jim's line about marriage is very him, and her reaction of contemplative silence is very her. Their connection is there and it's obvious, and to me, it feels a bit more forward than their friendship was in canon (especially with this chapter) but they're not quite there yet; them sharing a connected bedroom only heightens this.
Also, hi Kelly. Figured she'd be a staff member, but I love how you characterized her as absolutely done with everything. You've truly captured the Business Bitch.
Roy is similar and different in a lot of ways. Him being a gambler and it affecting his own business in the process is an angle I never would have expected but makes sense in this setting. His possessiveness under the guise of reliance on her to work is very in-character, and Pam wanting to marry him solely for financial security reminded me of *Lee and Dawn's* dynamic from The Office UK. His befriending Packer adds a new level of unlikability and is an indicator that he may not make it.
Speaking of which, there's the Pack-Man himself. It's easy to see why he was a salesman in-canon, despite how uncouth he is in general; he knows just what to say and I could hear and see David Koechner be charmingly slimy as this version of Packer. Also, he wanted a reporter? Guess he's going after that sweet clout. “There’s a story in everything, isn’t there? You just pay attention and you’ll find it.” I love the irony that the pseudo-villain gives the most profound and thematic line in the story. And his friendship with Michael is right on point. THIS GUY!
And, last but not least, Michael. I love how you kept both his charm and his absolute cluelessness. It's interesting that he owns his own supply company and actually made it a success, like if the Michael Scott Paper Company really did run Dunder Mifflin out of business. It's Britney, Bitch. The Jan reference adds a whole new layer to their workplace relationship since they become business rivals, which won't be touched on again, but it's neat. Finally, as much as Jim is put off by Michael, it warms my heart that he does find him enduring and considers him a good man, despite his many faults.
I'm curious when the Muhduhs in Suhvayanuh commence, and I'm looking forward to when that ball starts rolling.
Looking forward to more!
Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I love that you went so in depth with this review. Your Lee and Dawn comparison is so spot on, I have recently rewatched the UK Office and definitely drew inspiration from the way they interacted more than I did the US Office. I didn't want there to be any romantic ties that kept Jim and Pam from getting together, so it made sense to me to have their arrangement be less love and more stability. As for her relationship with Jim being a bit more forward I'd also agree with that, and that was done in order to fit the entire story into one week. They have to meet, develop feelings, and then see where that takes them in the timespan of the story, so it's moving pretty quickly. I don't think any of us here mind that, though, lol!
Anyway this review was so lovely to read and I am so appreciative of you being so thorough with it. Thank you SO much! I hope you keep enjoying!
1 Wow, I love the Clue board game.
Seriously though, this one immediately grabbed me. The premise, the setup, the intrigue, it's all executed fantastically.
I wanna get into characterization because this was my favorite aspect of this piece.
- JIM: him being a reporter is brilliant. It works because he's an observer in canon, always has been from the show's start, so him being the one to analyze this nutty group of party guests makes total sense. There's also his professional relationship with Wallace, which I feel works with his constant aspirations for more than his given profession, and Wallace is giving him that chance despite his own ulterior motive of "I don't wanna see that Packer asshat."
- ERIN & RYAN: Again, perfect. Erin's shyness and need to answer to authority lines up with her early appearances in canon. And Ryan? Holding on to whatever limited power he has, thinking he's hot stuff and being rude and standoffish. Wonderful.
- ROY & PAM: even though they don't show up for long, it's great how you made Jim instantly fall for Pam the moment his eyes meet her. And her looking out through the landscape makes total sense given her aspirations as an artist; she wants to take in everything she can so she can replicate it with her brushes later. And Roy's boisterous arrival and propensity for alcohol are, well, all you really need for a Roy.
- AND THE REST: Their occupations, their profiles, and Jim's analysis of each one make me excited because it feels like these ARE the characters from the show, just in a different place and time. I especially love Phillip H's mention.
My only hope is that Pam isn't the killer. I'm not in the minority in that I want to see a happy ending, too, and I hope that she and a few others come out of this alive and able to recover. (I'm pretty sure that Jim was always gonna survive but, hey, been wrong before.)
I'm interested to see where this goes. Well done!
PS: If Kevin shows up as the head chef I'll be so happy.
PPS: Can't wait to see how Creed fits into all this if he does.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for this review! I love that the characterizations are standing out to you and that you think they're fitting as far as the characters we know. I definitely want them to feel familiar but true to the time and setting that I'm putting them in, so this means so much. I can't give anything away as to the ending/the killer/the murdered/how other characters come into play, so I hope that you keep enjoying and reading and are happy with the outcome!
1 ...Damn, man.
I appreciate you taking some of the Christmastime story conventions and made them your own. The fact that Phil was the Tiny Tim AND that the real Santa was there was just heartbreaking and heartwarming, respectively. Cece is the best as always, and I love we get to learn more about Gerald and Betsy since "Niagara" is all we saw of them.
There's also the little things. Dwight getting the FMLA approved just goes to show how far he's come; the man wouldn't do it for just anyone. And the fact that someone questioned him about the doc is fascinating in this instance since the office is a bunch of celebrities now, and as charming and outgoing as Jim is, of course, this was an instance of "Please, now's not the time". Makes sense.
The struggle with Jim and Pam felt VERY natural. Not to overshare, but my parents had to undergo similar emotions that they're feeling and they're intense. And, as a father yourself, I'm sure you know better than anyone.
I'm reading this right off the heels of setting and decorating the tree with my folks AND a LEGO train display around it, so how about some more Christmas feels three days off?
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours!
Author's Response:
Thank you very much 3V. I like bringing in Gerald and Betsy because you're right, we don't get to see a lot of them. Thanks for picking up on all those details like FMLA, real Santa, and Jim putting the fangirl in her place. It really makes me feel like the effort I put into writing is worth it when I get comments like that.
I've had my own issues with hospital stays around the holidays. They're never any fun. I'm glad the emotions I put into Jim and Pam came alive for you.
I hope you have a great holiday season. Merry Christmas.
1 So I've been following your content for a while now, and I've been enjoying it! I'm a sucker for Hurt/Comfort stories and this throughline of Pam having anxiety is not only interesting but makes sense given the character's history.
The episode drove me to write my own follow-up for it on this site as well, since... yeah, S7 as a whole is really weak to me except for some key moments, Michael's story and "Threat Level Midnight" notwithstanding, and this episode is the pinnacle of that. Not a bad one by any means, but it definitely is one of my least favorites (Then again I can sit through "Scott's Tots"). Though I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'll definitely say one of the things that saved the episode for me was, ironically, Dwight, whose talking heads are some of the best in the series.
You use a more realistic approach to Jim's response, the "I just want it to stop" hitting much harder after reading this. The possibility of a concussion makes sense considering the constant thousand-yard stares during the episode, and it's more than reasonable that he got PTSD after even the initial attack (and his coworkers laughing and playing along AGH hate it). His response - being in a very dark and emotional place right now - is more than reasonable, and I'm glad you didn't sugarcoat things.
My favorite aspect of this though is Pam. Throughout your stories, she's had to experience panic attacks, Jim by her side to comfort her. Now, after maturing and becoming an Office Admin and a mom, she's much more attuned to this sort of outburst, and her being there for Jim because she understands what he's going through is *very* heartwarming.
(Also, considering the intensity of Jim's condition, I can visualize a threat of *pressing charges* coming in. He injured a coworker and drove him to desperate acts (lacrosse stick), so much so that he probably couldn't work the next day. No doubt Holly's gonna be involved.)
Much like your other pieces, a simple one-shot dealing with unseen moments where they grow as friends and a couple. Well done!
1 This is a very poignant piece and I'm glad you shared it here. ED is a big issue, and though I don't struggle with it, I also have insecurities about weight sometimes, and ED is certainly not a "woman's issue".
I also appreciate you bringing in the subject when it comes to Jim's character, since it was always subtly hinted at in-canon but never explicitly stated; I hinted at it in both of my larger fics myself. Jim's a character with so many problems and insecurities that it takes someone like Pam to make him feel whole, feel like himself. I especially love the fact that you pointed this out: Dwight is confident and happy with his completely neurotic and pompous self while Jim doesn't realize the good man he really is, using snark to hide his unaddressed self-esteem issues. It's always been a layer to their dynamic that I wish was further expanded upon.
I echo pretty much everything that's already been said by these other reviews, so I'll add this. Everyone is properly in-character and I am here for that: his coworkers' misguided attempts to help and being nosy in general, Kelly unintentionally playing into his insecurities for her own weight loss, Pam doing everything and anything to get through to him, and Jim *constantly* living in denial until the truth confronts him head-on and he no longer has a choice. I'm a character study guy (as you could guess from this very review) so when one puts these pre-established characters in a situation, no matter how real, and portrays it in a way that these characters would accurately respond to it, that pulls me in, and you did so fantastically with this, addressing a very serious and impactful problem in the process.
Excellent piece.
"He doesn’t want to be presumptuous but all he’s been thinking about for the past twelve minutes as the car sped away from the restaurant is how much he wants to kiss her again; how much he wants to keep on kissing her until he either dies from happiness or wakes up."
My (canon-compliant) take on Pam and Jim's romantic journey, beginning with their first date. Includes flashbacks.
1 I've been keeping up with this story and have enjoyed it a bunch, the S9 material especially (since I've been touching up a Season 9 AU I wrote months ago while writing my current work) and I just wanted to talk about Delilah.
As an audience/reader surrogate and a member of the crew, Delilah's point of view is simply fascinating and fantastically executed. The conversation with Brian, her trepidations on continuing the show after "Niagra", the way she's dedicated to having this story conclude with a grand sense of finality, all of it speaks to every fan of the couple and many fans of the show.
I write this review since I wrote a similar character in the aforementioned AU story and though I was wondering whether or not to keep him as part of the story, you inspired me to have him stick around. I don't like Season 9 for a myriad of reasons, hence my want to rewrite it, but Delilah offers a perspective for those who appreciate what the show itself offered.
Many thanks, and well done!
Author's Response: I really appreciate your comment, I never used to like S9 either but it's grown on me over time. And explaining my way out of the things about canon I generally don't care for is my favorite thing to do in fic. I'm glad this inspired you to continue, I'd love a link to the story if you want to share it!