Pam was annoyed when Michael called her into his office on Friday afternoon at 4:45 and told her that he wanted her to accompany him to the yearly paper convention, this year in Nashville, Tennessee. She was even more annoyed when Michael told her they were leaving on Monday. But after a weekend of fighting with Roy, she was packed by Sunday afternoon and couldn’t wait to leave the next day. She felt like the week apart would be good for them both.

A car horn honked at 6:30 on Monday morning and with a cup of coffee in one hand and her suitcase in the other, she made her way out the front door. She outwardly groaned when she saw Dwight was in the car as well. Michael got out of the car to help her put the suitcase in the trunk.

“Good morning Pamarooni,” Michael said.

“Morning Michael,” Pam replied. “Is Dwight taking us to the airport?”

“No, he’s coming too. He even brought his cowboy boots,” Michael said.

Pam climbed in the backseat and said good morning to Dwight. Michael and Dwight started spewing facts about Nashville.

“You know,” Michael said. “Paper was invented because of country music.”

Pam leaned her head back against the seat and shook her head. She had no idea how she was going to get through the next week. Michael was bad enough but there was nothing worse than Michael as a tourist.
When Pam opened her eyes a few minutes later she was confused.

“Where are we going Michael?” She asked, leaning forward. “The airport is the other direction.”

“We’re going to pick up Jim,” Michael told her.
Pam’s heart flip flopped suddenly.

“Jim’s going?” She asked, trying to sound casual but knowing that her voice catching in her throat. When Michael nodded at her in the rearview mirror she realized that this trip might not be as bad as she thought.

Pam was exhausted. She shut the door to her hotel room and fell backwards onto the bed, kicking off her shoes in the process. Her brain hurt from a day with Michael. He was like a 4 year old child with ADD when he got around new people. People who hadn’t heard his jokes or witnessed his shenanigans. She didn’t even have Jim or Dwight to cushion some of the blow. She had barely seen either one of them all day because unlike their boss, they were off in meetings and seminars actually trying to get something from this convention.

Wine and some really bad straight to cable movie is what she decided that she needed. She was definitely in need of some relaxing if she was going to manage one more day of following Michael around. She sat up to find the number for room service when she heard a knock on the door.
S
he threw her head back in defeat. What does he want now? She thought to herself as she made her way to the door.

“Michael….” She said, opening the door, not bothering to look out the peephole.

Instead she found Jim and she gasped slightly. He stood in front of her, changed out of his business attire, in jeans and a plain white t-shirt. Her heart did flip flops and she had to remind herself that she was engaged. To another man.

Jim smiled. “I’m sorry, were you expecting someone else?”

Pam groaned. “Ughhh,” she said. “No, I thought for sure it was going to be Michael. Coming back to torture me some more.”

“Bad day, Beesly?” Jim asked. Pam opened the door and motioned for him to come in.

“You have no idea,” she answered. “And you know what? It’s your fault.”

Jim chuckled. “My fault? Really?”

“Yes,” Pam said, smugly. “You knew that I was going to be stuck with him all day and you didn’t even come try to rescue me. Once.”

Jim put his hands on her shoulders and then quickly removed them. “Well, I am here to rescue you now.” He said. “We’re going out.”

“We are?” She asked and Jim nodded. “Where are we going?” She grabbed a pair of jeans and a pink tank top and went into the bathroom pushing it almost all the way shut.

He shrugged. “I don’t know. We’ll find some place. As long as it has food and alcohol, I’m good.”

Sixty seconds later, Pam reemerged from the bathroom. She grabbed her purse and checked to make sure she had her room key.

“I could definitely use a drink,” she agreed. “Or two… or….”

“Let’s get you some alcohol Beesly,” Jim laughed, shutting the door behind them.

Jim and Pam left the hotel and walked a couple blocks to Broadway, the heart of downtown. They decided to stop and get some dinner at Jack’s Barbeque after asking the concierge for recommendations on a good restaurant. They both downed a few beers with dinner and Pam was suddenly feeling better.

“What now, Halpert?” Pam asked, as they walked outside. The street was bustling with people and music could be heard from all directions.

“Wanna just walk and see where it takes us?” Jim asked and Pam nodded.

“So Michael was pretty bad today, huh?”

Pam chuckled. “You have no idea,” she said. “I wish I could get my hands on some Riddlin to slip him tomorrow. I am dreading it.”

“Well, maybe we’ll figure out a way to sneak you away from him,” Jim said and Pam smiled.

She wasn’t sure if it was the beer that was lightening her mood or her friend. She realized lately that she felt a little funny every time she saw him. Funny like there were butterflies in her stomach. Funny like it was a little hard to breathe at times. Funny like…. Wait. Why was she even thinking about it? She had a fiancé at home and even though they had their problems, she still loved him. But am I in love with him? She asked herself.

“What are you thinking about Beesly?” Jim asked.
Pam blushed and giggled. “You don’t even want to know,” she said.

“Try me,” he answered and Pam suddenly stopped. “What?” He asked.

“Let’s go in,” she said, motioning to the right of them.

“Seriously?” Jim asked. “Here?”

“Jim, the Wildhorse Saloon is a mecca of entertainment,” Pam said, keeping a straight face.

“Pam. A ‘mecca of entertainment’? Did those words just come out of your mouth?”

Pam giggled. “So I did some reading of one of the brochures at the hotel. But seriously. Let’s go in. They have alcohol and they have a big dance floor. We can make fun of everyone.”

“Lead the way, Beesly, lead the way.”

2 hours, 3 beers, and 2 shots later…

“Please come dance with me,” Pam begged Jim, trying to pull him by his arm to the dance floor.

“If I am out there with you,” Jim said. “How am I going to take pictures of you to blackmail you with later?”

“You,” Pam said, smugly. “Don’t have a camera. Now come on.”

Jim, reluctantly, let Pam drag him out onto the dance floor. There were several people dancing on their own, but a big group of people were doing an organized line dance to the loud country music that was pumping out of the speakers.

Jim leaned down to Pam’s shoulder. “Do you even know how to dance?” Jim almost yelled.

“Watch and learn, Halpert,” Pam said, loudly.

Within minutes, Pam’s limbs were flailing about. Jim could tell that she was trying to keep up with the group of line dancers but her “moves” were nowhere close to what they were doing. She would randomly stomp and clap and then shake her hips. Jim found himself smiling and couldn’t seem to stop.

A few minutes later, the music ended and the DJ announced that they were going to start dance lessons. Pam lightly punched Jim on the shoulder.

“Now you can learn to dance like me,” Pam said.

Jim rolled his eyes. “Oooh,” he said. “You mean I could learn all that for free? Didn’t you go Julliard for years to learn those steps?”

Pam huffed and balled up her fist to punch him but he jumped out of the way in time to avoid her hand.

Jim gave in and tried to keep up with the announcer’s instructions.

“No, Jim,” Pam tried to help. She grabbed his arm and stepped close to him. “You rock forward on your left foot and then rock back on your right foot. Are you even taking this seriously?”

“Pam, the dance is called the Tush Push. I didn’t know I was supposed to be taking it seriously.”

He put air quotes around the word “seriously” and that put Pam into a fit of giggles. She tried to help him out with the next few steps but every few seconds she was falling into him, laughing.

When Pam turned around, Jim quickly moved towards the side of the dance floor. He didn’t want to completely abandon her and he couldn’t seem to take him eyes off of her. And while Pam was correct, he didn’t have a regular camera, he did have his cell phone which just happened to have a camera in it. He snuck a few pictures of her dancing for later use.

“What are you doing all the way over here?” Pam asked, running up to Jim. Up close, Jim could see that little beads of perspiration were starting to form on her forehead.

“This is the best seat in the house. There is no way I could ever keep up with those famous Beesly dance moves. Who knew what affect Brooks and Dunn had on you.” He laughed.

Pam swatted at him but stumbled and missed. Jim could tell that the alcohol had set in.

“You’re drunk, Beesly,” Jim said. “I should probably get you back to your room so you can get some rest before your day of babysitting Michael.”

“One more song,” Pam slurred. “But I want you to come out here and dance with me.”

As if almost on cue, a slow song started. “Ok, one song,” Jim agreed. Twist my arm, he thought.

Pam wrapped her arms around Jim’s waist. Just for support, Jim told himself. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and listened to the song that was playing. He’d never heard it before but he felt like he’d been punched in the gut. The words could have been taken directly out of his heart.

I know if I just keep my distance
You will see what you are missing
And you’ll learn no one can love you liked I do
I look involved in conversation
But I’m struggling with temptation
So tonight as you walk into the room

What I want is to hold you
Cause my world without you is just
Another lonely place to be
And what I need is to hold out
Until you have no doubt
There’s only one love for you and it’s me
So I’ll be strong till you can believe
In what I need

Jim pulled Pam closer to his chest and hoped she was drunk enough that she wouldn’t remember how tightly he held on to her. He didn’t want to let this moment go. She wasn’t his, not even close. But somehow in this moment, she was close and he didn’t want to let her go. He knew she didn’t realize it, but he would have stayed out there for 100 more songs if she’d ask. This is all we’re ever gonna have, he told himself. It was bittersweet for him. He lived for these little moments but when they were over, it hurt. It hurt is head, his heart, his entire body. He didn’t know how he was ever going to get over her.

My impression of what love is
Comes and goes like your kisses
Clear as day when I hold you in my arms
Though I’ll admit that you’re my weakness
I’m gonna fight these feelings
Until you can promise me your heart

What I want is to hold you
Cause my world without you is just
Another lonely place to be
And what I need is to hold out
Until you have no doubt
There’s only one love for you and it’s me
So I’ll be strong till you can believe
In what I need

Pam closed her eyes as her head rested on Jim’s chest. She knew she was drunk but she also knew that she never felt like this. Safe. Warm. Loved. For all she knew, Jim looked at her like a little sister, just trying to be protective of her. He was her best friend. But he was holding her. And dancing with her. His arms were tight around her like he never wanted to let her go. And his heart seemed to be pounding like hers was.

Maybe I should see if he wants to come back to my….. oh my God, she thought. I am drunk. Was she actually going down that road again? The only thing she should be doing is going back to her room and calling her fiancé. Telling him that she loved him and that she was sorry for the fight they had. Even though it wasn’t her fault. But wasn’t that the story of her life? Apologizing for things that weren’t her fault? Just so Roy wouldn’t be in a bad mood and make her life more miserable. She thought it was pathetic that she dreaded 5:00 on Friday afternoons and couldn’t wait until 8:00 on Monday morning.

The song ended and the two of them stayed locked in an embrace for a few seconds until the next song, a faster one, started.

“You sticking around to dance some more?” Jim asked her as they pulled away from each other.

Pam smiled and shook her head. “I think you better get me back to the hotel.”

Pam tucked her arm around Jim’s as they walked back to the hotel. The night air had turned a little chilly and although her cheeks were flushed from the alcohol, she was a little chilly. She wasn’t too drunk to realize that she was probably too close to him, but she was drunk enough not to care. And he wasn’t pulling away anyway.

“Can I tell you something?” Pam asked Jim. He looked down at her but briefly turned away when he saw that she was looking up at him with those eyes. Those eyes that told him she yearned to tell him more than she ever dared. Those eyes that he swore were telling him right back all the things that he had always thought but never said out loud.

“Of course,” he answered, scared of what she was going to say but even more scared of what he knew she wouldn’t.

“I don’t want to be with Roy anymore,” she said quietly.

What am I supposed to say to that? He thought to himself. But he didn’t have to say anything. After a short pause, she kept talking.

“I’m not in love with him. I don’t even know if I ever was. In high school I was this shy girl whose favorite subject was art. I only had a few friends, but they were good friends. Roy was friends with everyone. He was the star of the football team. I was flattered when he got a crush on me… but I think now that it might have been because everyone told me that I should be. I don’t know…. Sometimes I think I was just a dare that went wrong for him. My parents loved the fact that this popular guy liked me and thought it might help me come out of my shell a little bit. Then we started dating and I got stuck in this rut. I fell into a familiar routine and I really, really don’t like change. So I’ve just stayed….”

Jim didn’t know what to say. Sure, he was her best friend but they had never talked like this before. She would make little comments here and there so he had an idea that she wasn’t completely happy but she had never shared anything like this with him. She obviously needed to vent and his heart sank when he looked up and realized that the hotel was just a block away.

Silent for a few minutes, she leaned her head on Jim’s arm and started talking again. “We fought last weekend,” she said. “I’m just so tired of fighting. And do you know what we fought about?” She didn’t want for Jim to answer. “He got mad at me because he wanted to go out to eat and I just wanted five minutes to finish the shading on the painting I was working on. He came in the room and kicked the stool where all my paints and water were. So I told him that he should probably got out to eat without me and that pissed him off even more.”

“Has he ever hit you?” Jim asked, surprised that the words came out loud – he thought he was just thinking them.

“No,” Pam said. “And I don’t think that he would, but I don’t know. He has a pretty bad temper.”

“So what happened when you told him that you weren’t going to go with him?” Jim asked, wanting to hear the rest of the story.

“I left,” Pam said, quietly. “I drove around for awhile and when I came back home, he was gone so I went to bed. And he must have been out with friends because he didn’t come home until late and then slept on the couch.” I drove by your house, she wanted to tell him. And I saw your car and I really just wanted to go knock on your door. But I didn’t.

Jim’s heart hurt just listening to how sad she was. Screw this, he said and wrapped his arm around Pam’s shoulder.

They got to the hotel and Jim’s arm stayed around her all the way up to the 7th floor.

“You can always call me, you know,” he told her, when the elevator doors opened.

“Right,” she said. “Cause you want to hear about all this crap.” She waved her hand around and swirled the air in front of her. “I’m sure that you have much better things to do than have the receptionist cry on your shoulder.”

They reached the door to Pam’s room and Jim turned to face her.

“Don’t you realize that you are more than ‘the receptionst’ to me? I care, Pam. I care when you are hurting. You aren’t stuck in that relationship. You can get out if you really want to. And I’m going to say this because I know that you’re drunk and I really hope that you won’t remember this tomorrow, but I wish that you would get out of that relationship. Because I cannot stand to see you like this.”

Tears started to form in the corners of her eyes and Jim instantly pulled her into a hug when he noticed.

“Hey,” he said, softly. “I’ll help you, if you need help. But you have to want it for yourself.”

Pam pulled away and brought her face close to his. She closed her eyes and leaned forward to kiss him.

“Pam,” Jim said, gently pushing her away. “We can’t do this here. Not right now. I don’t want you to wake up tomorrow regretting anything.”

Pam turned away from Jim and fumbled for her room key. “Now I just feel like an idiot,” she said.

Jim grabbed her arm and forced her to look at him. “Don’t,” he said. “Don’t ever feel like that with me. I’m gonna be here… when the time is right.”

She slid the key in the door and pushed it open when the light turned green. “Good night,” she said.

“’Night,” he replied and waited until she locked the door from the other side.

He made his way down the hall to his room and tried not to kick himself for being a good person. But it was true what he told her. He would wait for her. He didn’t know what else to do, he was already hopeless.
His cell phone chimed with a new message as he sat on the bed and took off his shoes.

“Thank you,” it said and he smiled. He knew in his heart he did the right thing even though his brain and other parts of his body were telling him that he should have let her kiss him.

“Anytime,” he replied back. “And thank YOU for this.” With that, he attached a picture of her dancing just a short time before.

“Ughh,” she replied back. “I am such a dorky dancer.”

He grinned. “I know,” he answered. “It’s very cute.”