So this is a little thing that I just couldn't get out of my head for some reason. Essentially it's a look at Jim and Pam's Valentine's Days throughout the whole nine seasons but told through the evolution of communication. So yeah, hopefully it makes sense.
Big thanks to RD and R15 for putting up with my moaning and helping me out here.
I don't own anything here, and I really don't know much about history either, but Google is my best friend. So apologies for any historical inaccuracies. Blame Google.
1. S1 1904: Letter by MrsKHalpert
2. S2 1918: Telegram by MrsKHalpert
3. S3 1931: Telephone by MrsKHalpert
4. S4 1947: Newspaper by MrsKHalpert
5. S5 1956: Radio by MrsKHalpert
6. S6 1972: Morse Code by MrsKHalpert
7. S7 1997: AIM by MrsKHalpert
8. S8 2006: Facebook by MrsKHalpert
9. S9 2013: Whatsapp by MrsKHalpert
10. Present Day: FaceTime by MrsKHalpert
Pamela Beesly
1359 Mulberry Street
Scranton, PA
February 12th, 1904
My fondest James,
I hope my letter finds you well and that you are enjoying the unseasonably warm weather that has graced Scranton of late. I must say, I am enjoying the lighter days very much so as they aid with my painting. If it’s not too much to ask of you, I would be so bold as to ask for you to view my latest watercolor. Your thoughts on my work always mean so much to me.
I’m filled with a sense of mischief as I write to you today. I know I should be fawning over Leroy what with the upcoming festivities, but I would much rather hear of any tricks or capers that you are planning. Hearing of your skulduggery always puts a smile on my face on even the gloomiest of days. So what do you have in mind next for poor old farmer Schrute? Stealing his prize horse? Replacing his beets with carrots? I beg of you to share with me, I long for something to make me smile, and I know I can trust that you will be the one to do that.
Alas I do not have any plans for Saint Valentine’s Day of a romantic nature, Leroy and his brother Kenneth have to see a man about a horse, or some other such nonsense. Do you have intentions to court any fair ladies? I know that any maiden you chose to bestow your affections upon would have to be very special indeed.
Until we reunite, I suppose at Mr Scott’s next symposium, know that I will be thinking of you often and cherish our friendship fondly.
Yours faithfully,
Pamela
James Halpert
383 Linden Avenue
Scranton, PA
February 14th, 1904
My fair Pamela,
I thank you profusely for your kind wishes and of course, it would please me nothing more than to see your latest work of art. I have no doubt in my mind that it will be a masterpiece. I shall count the days until I am able to gaze upon it with my own eyes.
As I sit here, thinking of your beauty and grace, it pains me that today of all days, we cannot be together. What I would not give to see your fair face, to hold your delicate hand, dare I say, kiss your soft lips. I offer my sincere apologies if my forwardness offends you, but I think of nothing but you for as the day is long.
If we were able to spend but one Saint Valentine’s Day together, I would shower you with gifts and tokens of my affections. But it still wouldn’t be enough. No bouquet of roses is as beautiful as you. No French perfume as sweet smelling as you. No chocolate bon bons as delicious as you.
Oh how it pains me that you are betrothed to another. If you were but mine, I would worship the very ground you walk on. You are a delicate flower that needs to be tended to with the upmost love and respect, because in the most perfect conditions you will flourish. I would provide daily joy to make you smile, encouragement to see your own true potential and all my love so that you would know you are everything to me.
You must know that your mere presence fills my soul and nourishes me with the morsels I am but lucky enough to receive. How I long to hear the sweet sound of your laughter. I cherish every moment that I am able to steal from you. I gaze at you from afar, wondering if the sentiment will ever be returned.
Until the day that you may be mine, and I can hold you in my arms, I will simply wish you a Happy Saint Valentine’s Day. May it be filled with all the love that you deserve.
With my deepest affection,James
James Halpert
383 Linden Avenue
Scranton, PA
February 14th, 1904
My dearest Pamela,
I thank you profusely for your kind wishes and of course, it would please me nothing more than to see your latest work of art. I have no doubt in my mind that it will be a masterpiece. I shall count the days until I am able to gaze upon it with my own eyes.
Ah farmer Schrute. I was able to pilfer his trowel, and you know how he doesn’t go anywhere without it, but I was perplexed as to what to do with it. I had procured some of ‘America’s Most Famous Dessert’ the weekend just gone, but rather than eat it, I had saved it for a special occasion. And what an occasion it turned out to be! I borrowed my mother’s largest mixing bowl, and placed the trowel inside, covering it with the jello. Once it had set, under the cover of darkness, I crept onto Schrute Farms and unmolded the jello onto his front porch, knocked on the door, and quickly made haste to the cover of a bush. Oh Pamela, how I do wish you could have seen his reaction. It still causes my sides to shake with laughter whenever I imagine his face.
I’m saddened to hear that you shall not be celebrating Saint Valentine’s Day in a fitting manner with your betrothed. I do not have cause for jubilations, and instead will be helping my brother Thomas with chores that he has promised to carry out for my parents. I’d like to think that perhaps one day in the not too distant future that we will both be able to celebrate Saint Valentine’s Day in the appropriate manner with our respective partners.
I will look forward indeed to seeing you at Mr’s Scott’s next gathering. And I too will be thinking of you fondly until then.
Yours truly,
James
TO: JAMES HALPERT
383 LINDEN AVENUE
SCRANTON, PA
STOP
Roses are red STOP Violets are blue STOP I didn't get any Valentine's gifts STOP How about you STOP
Pamela Beesly
TO: PAMELA BEESLY
1359 MULBERRY STREET
SCRANTON, PA
STOP
Sorry to hear that STOP Having card game tonight STOP Want to come STOP
James Halpert
TO: JAMES HALPERT
383 LINDEN AVENUE
SCRANTON, PA
STOP
Thanks for invite STOP Should stay home STOP
Pamela Beesly
TO: PAMELA BEESLY
1359 MULBERRY STREET
SCRANTON, PA
STOP
Alright Beesly STOP Happy Valentine's Day STOP
James Halpert
Operator: Dunder Mifflin Exchange. What number please?
Caller: Oh, hi
Operator: Oh, uh, hi
Caller: I uh, I need to speak to Wallace. But I, um, I didn't think you'd be on the exchange this morning. Why are you?
Operator: Oh, well, uh, I just needed to change some things around so I could be off this evening
Caller: Oh right. Have you and Roy got plans?
Operator: Yeah, he's taking me to the Glider for dinner later
Caller: Oh. Fancy.
Operator: Are you, um, are you and Karen doing anything?
Caller: I've got a table booked at Anna Maria's
Operator: Oh wow, that really is fancy
Caller: Yeah
Operator: Do you...
Caller: So... oh I'm sorry, go ahead
Operator: Oh, um, no, uh, do you want me to connect you to Wallace?
Caller: Oh. Yeah
Operator: One moment please
Caller (to the ringing tone): Happy Valentine's Day, Beesly
Operator (to the dead line): Happy Valentine's Day, Jim
SCRANTON TIMES-TRIBUNE
FEBRUARY 14th 1947
LONELY IN SCRANTON
The original prankster seeks a partner in crime for hijinx and capers.
Male, 29, GSOH, 6'3", enjoys musical theater, Icelandic sports and jellybeans.
You must love sports, art not so much. Blondes preferred. 20/20 vision is essential.
Ideally you can cook, as I will not be making you dinner. Unless it is Ossobuco. No yogurt please, but rhubarb pie is welcome.
Hoping for a Valentine's Day kiss.
Reply to PO BOX 879, Scranton, PA
SCRANTON TIMES-TRIBUNE
FEBRUARY 15th 1947
FOR SALE
Prized Philadelphia Warriors jersey signed by Joe Faulks for sale.
Contact P. Beesly 555-9032
SCRANTON TIMES-TRIBUNE
FEBRUARY 16th 1947
CORRECTIONS & RETRACTIONS
The original prankster would like to retract his lonely hearts and offer his sincerest apologies to P. Beesly.
The Joe Faulks signed Philadelphia Warriors jersey is no longer for sale.
Welcome back to WGBI. It's DJ Crazy Creed on your airwaves and that was Hound Dog by The King, Elvis Presely. Now for all you lovers out there, today is the day you've been waiting for. It's Valentine's Day and I know you cool cats are down for a swingin' time. So let's get down and dirty. I've got some shoutouts for some really special guys and gals coming up, and don't forget, if you want to send one in, just call 555-WGBI. Let's kick it off shall we? Kelly wants to tell Ryan how much she loves him and she can't wait to spend the rest of her life with you and have a million of your babies. Yikes. Jim is missing his fiancée Pam who's currently away on a road trip. Far out Pammy. You know, I took a road trip in 52'. Hitch hiked my way down to New Orleans, met some real nice gals and guys, if you know what I mean. Ate a lot of beignets too. Huh? What's that? Oh right. The shout outs. Michael is missing Holly. Meredith wants anyone to call her on 555-9012. Yada yada, let's play some more tunes baby.
That was Bluejean Bop by Gene Vincent. I'm your host DJ Crazy Creed here on WGBI and it's still Valentine's Day. So let's hear from more of you love sick puppies out there. Angela wants to send all her love to her cats. That can't be right. Oh it is? Ok, well, I guess everyone loves who they want. I was once in love with Lauren Bacall. Hell of a lover. Anyway. Andy is begging Julia for another chance. Stanley wants to wish all the ladies in his life a happy Valentine's Day. Monkey, D misses you. I had a pet monkey once. He stole all my money. Bastard. Oh look, little old Pammy on her road trip heard us and wants to send all her love back to Jimbo. She misses him terribly and can't wait to be home. And away from his ex-girlfriend who she thinks he might still be in love with. Well, this got awkward. Oh wait, it says here Pammy is joking. Jack, you better not be messing around on her, you hear me? Ok that's all we have time for today. Back to the hits. What's that? Ah yes. Our final message is from our sponsor, Vance Refrigeration. Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration, would like to wish his beautiful wife Phyllis Vance, the happiest Valentine's Day. And to everyone else, remember, only a Vance Refrigeration refrigerator can keep your Valentine's Day champagne super duper chilled. I don't know about you, but I'm feeling pretty chilled already. So I think it's time for a little Bill Haley and his Comets.
Jim: .- -- / .. / -.. --- .. -. --. / - .... .. ... / .-. . --. .... - ..--..
Pam: -.-- ... ..- / --- .--. . .-.. .-.. . -.. / .-. .. --. .... - / .-- .-. ... -. --.
Jim: .-. .. --. .... - ..--..
Pam: -.-- . ---
Jim: .. / - .... .. -. -.- / .-- . ' .-. . / --. . - - .. -. --. / - .... . / .... .- -. --. / --- ..-. / .. -
Pam: -- . / - ... ... -.-.--
Jim: ... . . / .. / - --- .-.. -.. / -.-- --- ..- / - .... .. ... / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. / -... . / ..-. ..- -.
Pam: -... ..- - / -.. .. -. -. . .-. / .- -. -.. / .- / -- ... ...- .. . / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. / .... .- ...- . / -... . . -. / ..-. ..- -. / - ... ...
Jim: - .... .. ... / .. ... / -- --- .-. . / ..- ... . ..-. ..- .-..
Pam: .- .... / - .... . .-. . .-..-. --- / - .... . / .-. ... -- .- -. -.-. .
Jim: .-.. --- ...- . / -.-- --- ..-
Pam: .-.. ... ...- . / -.-- ... ..- / - ... ...
Jim: .... .- .--. .--. -.-- / ...- .- .-.. . -. - .. -. . ... / -.. .- -.-- / -... . . ... .-.. -.--
Pam: .... .- .--. .--. -.-- / ...- .- .-.. . -. - .. -. . --- / -.. .- -.--
(Jim: Am I doing this reght?
Pam: Ysu opelled right wrsng
Jim: Right?
Pam: Yeo
Jim: I think we're getting the hang of it
Pam: Me tss!
Jim: See I told you this would be fun
Pam: But dinner and a msvie would have been fun tss
Jim: This is more useful
Pam: Ah there'o the rsmance
Jim: Love you
Pam: Lsve ysu tss
Jim: Happy Valentines Day Beesly
Pam: Happy Valentineo Day)
Receptionitis15: jim
Receptionitis15: jim
Receptionitis15: jiiiiiiiiiiim
Receptionitis15: ive got an idea
Receptionitis15: jimjimjimjim
JIM9334: whaaattt???
Receptionitis15: i missed u
JIM9334: i just went 2 pee
JIM9334: u no that
JIM9334: u saw me leave
Receptionitis15: is it my fault ur so irrisisistabel????
JIM9334: u no what we shuld do??
Receptionitis15: wot?
JIM9334: we shuld do it
Receptionitis15: do wot?
JIM9334: IT beesly we should do IT
JIM9334: S
JIM9334: e
JIM9334: X
JIM9334: every1 else here has
Receptionitis15: :O
Receptionitis15: that was my idea
Receptionitis15: u stole it :(
JIM9334: how did i steal it?!?!
JIM9334: i JUST said it
Receptionitis15: well y do u think i was messagin u????
JIM9334: well i dont no
JIM9334: so r we gonna do it??
Receptionitis15: wel duh
Receptionitis15: but where??
JIM9334: the bathroom?
Receptionitis15: no
JIM9334: wot?
Receptionitis15: 2 gross X(
JIM9334: stairwell?
Receptionitis15: r u crazy????
JIM9334: stationery cupboard?
Receptionitis15: mayb
JIM9334: lets take a walk n find sumwhere
Receptionitis15: k
JIM9334: is offline
Receptionitis15: is offline
JIM9334: is online
Receptionitis15: is online
JIM9334: best
JIM9334: valentines
JIM9334: day
JIM9334: eva
Receptionitis15: u can say that again ;)
JIM9334: best
JIM9334: valentines
JIM9334: day
JIM9334: eva
Receptionitis15: such a dork
JIM9334: :D
Pam Halpert
Today
📅 Pam plans to attend Mommy & Me Get Fit!!
👤 Pam is covered in baby puke
Kelly Kapoor wrote:
Pam! Did you see Ryan's wall?? OMG call me
👤 Pam wants to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day!! <3
🎁Helene Beesly gave Pam a public gift:
Happy V day sweetie! So fun to get to spend today with you!
Pam wrote:
Thanks mom!
Jim Halpert wrote:
Happy Valentine's Day Beesly! Missing you so much today. Wish I was there with you instead of in stupid Florida. Remember last Valentine's Day? We should definitely have sex in a closet again. That was so hot. I've been thinking a lot about you since I've been gone. Maybe we can have a call tonight, because I'm realllllly gonna be missing you later in bed. Love you xxx
Pam wrote:
Jim! This is public!!!!
Phyllis Vance wrote:
Am I doing this right Pam? Can you see this?
+ Pam is now friends with Phyllis Vance
Yesterday
👤 Pam is missing Pickles
Feb 10th
Isabel Poreba wrote:
Can't wait for girls' night!!! See you sooooooon!
Jim Halpert 😍
Today
Where are you?
06:33 Delivered
I just went to the store real quick to pick something up
06:34
Didn't think you'd be awake yet
06:34
Can you pick up more toilet paper please?
06:42 Delivered
Sure
06:43
Oh wait. I forgot, we need more milk too
06:58 Delivered
Heading back to the store
06:58
Anything else?
06:58
Nope that's it
06:59 Delivered
Thanks
06:59 Delivered
No problem
07:03
Happy Valentine's Day
07:05 Not Delivered
Love you
07:05 Not Delivered
Jim Halpert 😍
FaceTime Video...
Pam: Hey babe!
Jim: Happy Valentine's Day baby. I miss you
Pam: Happy Valen...hold on one sec
(Pam away from the phone: It's in the closet (pause for muffled shouting) Yes it's definitely in there, I saw it last night)
Pam: Sorry babe, Phil can't find his helmet. Where were we?
Jim: (laughing) I was saying Happy Valentine's Day
Pam: Happy Valentin...
(Pam away from the phone: No you can't have candy for breakfast. No, I said no. Put it back. Take a banana instead (more muffled shouting and Pam's phone is snatched away))
Cece: Hi dad, can I have that candy you got at Christmas?
Jim: No. Put your mom back on
Cece: Pleaseeee daddy?
Jim: No
Cece: Pleaseeeeeeee (bats her eyelashes)
Jim: Fine, but just a small piece ok?
Cece: Thanks dad, love you (throws phone back to Pam)
Jim: (sighs) Love you too
Pam: Sorry it's a bit crazy this morn... (phone snatched again)
Philip: Dad!
Jim: Hey bud, how you doing?
Philip: I'm gonna scoot to school today (stares at phone with tongue poking out the side of his mouth for a few seconds) bye dad (throws phone on the bed)
Pam: Hi (sighs) sorry
Jim: (laughing)
Pam: What?
Jim: He's made you into a dog
Pam: Ugh how do you take this stupid thing off?
(Pam shouting away from the phone: Philip come back and take this stupid filter off)
Jim: Oh shoot, Wade is calling me, I've gotta go. I love you
Pam: Love you too baby. Oh! And Happy Valentine's Day
Jim: Happy Valentine's Day Beesly