Summary: Casino Night came and went but something unexpected changes everything. Title from the song by Switchfoot. Spoiler through Ben Franklin.
Categories: Jim and Pam,
Alternate Universe Characters: Jim/Pam
Genres: Angst, Fluff, In Stamford, Workdays
Warnings: None
Challenges: None
Series: None
Chapters: 13
Completed: No
Word count: 26841
Read: 46877
Published: January 16, 2007
Updated: November 14, 2007
1. Revelations by WildBerryJam
2. Telling the Truth by WildBerryJam
3. Keeping (Some) Secrets by WildBerryJam
4. Before We Say Goodbye by WildBerryJam
5. Maybe I'm Amazed by WildBerryJam
6. Space Between Us by WildBerryJam
7. The First Date by WildBerryJam
8. Making an Effort by WildBerryJam
9. Impossible to Ignore by WildBerryJam
10. Vacation by WildBerryJam
11. Resolutions by WildBerryJam
12. The Merger by WildBerryJam
13. No Suprise Please by WildBerryJam
Revelations by WildBerryJam
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
May 11, 2006
She opened the taxi door in tears. She couldn’t believe what she had just done.
Once again, she listened to the practical side of her. Instead of doing the right thing. Instead of following her heart. She clutched the metal, and heard faint shuffling of feet as she walked up the stairs. Roy, using the bathroom. That’s what she thought. She hadn’t wondered why Roy was in such a rush to leave casino night. It was never a question of intentions. He just wasn’t big on corporate hoopla. In her mind, he went home, watched TiVoed episodes of Orange County Choppers, and fell asleep.
After paying the driver and getting home, she realized that she had forgotten her key. Rather than ringing the doorbell, she pulled out her cell phone, and dialed the number. Two rings. Finally, he picked up the phone.
“Hello?” He groaned. She probably woke him up. She wiped another tear from her cheek, and tried to contain herself.
“I’m locked out. Can you let me in?” She said, trying to contain all the emotions in her voice. He mumbled something, and the door swung open. Roy was there, putting on a shirt. He looked nervous.
“Hey babe.” He said as if he were trying to hide something. Pam was too distracted to notice anything. “Have a good time?”
“Sort of.” She said, and felt terrible for lying. She took off her coat, and slipped out of those uncomfortable heels. She put them by the door, but noticed another pair of shoes she’d never seen before. They weren’t guys shoes, which she could chalk up to Darryl. Then she realized Kelly must have left her heels at the house yesterday when she stopped by for hours of conversation and to see the wedding dress. She walked into the living room, with Roy right on her tail.
“Are you okay?” She asked, noting how weird he was acting. He nodded rapidly, and stood in front of the couch.
“Do you want to, like, watch a movie or something?” He asked, as if trying to cover something. “We could watch that Edward Scissorhands movie you love so much.”
She wanted to tell him no, because Jim had given her that DVD for Christmas a couple years ago. She sat down on the couch and sighed heavily. Two empty wine glasses were on the table. The table was clear when she left.
“What?” Roy asked when he saw Pam staring at the wine glasses. Instinctively, he pulled her in for a kiss. All she could think about was Jim the second he pulled her onto him. Not to raise suspicions, she let the kiss last for another twenty seconds, and she looked up at him with tired eyes.
“I think I’m just going to go to bed.” She said with a defeated sigh. He wasn’t Jim. She took a few steps towards the staircase. Roy stood in front of her.
“Come on, let’s stay up and talk or something.” He said, further raising suspicions. Roy never wanted to talk. And when he left the warehouse, he said he was beat. What changed? Pam just shook her head, and walked around her barricade. She walked up the stairs, and heard frantic footsteps both behind her, and ahead of her.
“What was that?” She asked, confused at hearing more than one set of footsteps.
“What was what?” He asked, trying to pull her closer. She pushed him away, and silently continued up the last two stairs.
“Pam, what’s going on? You’re acting crazy.” He asked, but she quickly silenced him. She walked into the bedroom, and saw a silhouette.
“Oh my God.” A voice said. A female voice. She was slipping on a shirt when Pam walked in, and she immediately recognized who it was.
“Katy?” Pam turned to look at Roy, who was red with embarrassment. She put the two together. It was a puzzle that she didn’t want to put together.
She ran down the stairs, and Roy quickly followed her. “Pammy, stop!” He called, but she ignored him. “Stop, okay? I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?” She shrieked, turning around. She could feel the tears welling in her eyes. “Sorry for cheating on me, or sorry you got caught?”
“Both.” He whispered, and put his hands on her shoulder. “You know I love…”
“Stop it!” She said, breaking free from his grasp. “Just stop it, okay? Three years. You strung me along for three years, and suddenly you decide you want to get married. How long has this been going on?” Pam had stunned him with her sudden aggression. He couldn’t answer. “How long have you been cheating on me?”
“Like a week after Halpert dumped her… she came on to me, I swear.” He tried rationalizing it. “I tried to break it off a couple times…”
“Oh look at you, the hero.” She said, trying not to cry, but failing miserably. “Roy, this …. It’s over.”
“What do you mean, it’s over?” He asked, but he knew full on what was going on. She held up her hand, slipped the shiny diamond ring on her finger, and put in his hand.
“I’m sure you and Katy will be very happy together.” She said, turning away from him. “I’ll be back tomorrow to get my stuff.” She stormed out of the house, and broke down at the end of the driveway. Two hours ago, she had a best friend and a fiancée that loved her. Now she was all alone. And it was all her fault.
***
She thought about calling Roy once, but knew immediately that was the wrong choice. He’d hurt her before, but nothing like this. Then the nagging thought of calling Jim came into her head. But she saw the way he looked when she told him her intentions to still marry Roy. Now she was single, and he would for sure think he was second choice.
But he wasn’t. She didn’t realize until that very moment Jim was filling in the blanks for all the things Roy was missing. Jim didn’t tickle her to resolve major conflicts. He didn’t discourage her art, calling it “impractical.” He talked, and more importantly listened
She knew there was only one thing she could do.
She spent an hour walking to his house. After the first three blocks, her feet were killing her, and she slipped off the heels she had put back on before storming out of the house. After another block, it began to rain.
“Great.” she said under her breath. Not only would she freeze, but she’d be soaking wet, and her dress would be ruined. She persevered, and walked the final two blocks to his house. After a few minutes of standing in his driveway, she finally mustered the strength to fight for what she wanted. And what she wanted was Jim.
She knocked on the door. There was nothing. She knocked again, even louder. She felt the breath pour out of her once she saw the lights come on in the distance. Jim answered the door in his pajamas. His eyes weren’t completely open once he answered the door, and it was clear she had woken it up. Once he woke up, he was stunned to see her there.
“Pam?” He said, unsure of the reality of all this. She pulled him in for one long kiss. Her lips were cold and wet, but somehow that didn‘t seem to matter. “Are you real, or am I dreaming?” She promptly reached out with her trembling arms, and pinched him.
“It’s raining, Jim. Can I come in?” Feeling stupid, he immediately let her in.
“What are you doing here?” He asked the obvious question as he went into a closet and pulled out a fresh, white towel. She was still in the blue dress she’d worn when she broke his heart. She wrapped the towel around her, and fidgeted nervously.
“I think I made a huge mistake tonight.” She said, talking herself through the upcoming monologue. “When I said that I can’t...”
“Don’t.” Jim said, bracing himself from the pain.
“It was out of sense of obligation.” She continued, not caring if it hurt him to think about right now. There was a serious payoff. “I mean, I had been with Roy for almost ten years….” Her voice trailed off as she felt weak and afraid. But she stopped herself, and took a whiff of confidence. “It wasn’t that I didn’t want to.” She took another step towards him. “Because I do, Jim. I really do want to be with you.”
“Are you sure I’m not dreaming?” Jim returned with a cheesy joke and a trademark smile. Pam held up her cold, trembling hand. The hand that once held her engagement ring. The hand that was now blank like a canvas. “You broke up with him?”
“I should’ve done it a long time ago.” Pam said, putting her hand back at her side. “He’s been cheating on me.” Her voice began to crack. She felt stupid that she hadn’t realized it before, and now it was all unraveling. Tears began to form in her eyes.
“Oh, Pam.” Jim shook his head consolingly. He pulled her into his arms. Somehow, it didn’t matter that she was soaking wet, and now his pajamas were matching it. It didn’t matter that she had just broken up with her fiancée. It just didn’t matter. Because she was there.
“And I don’t want you to think that I’m here just because Roy was cheating on me.” Pam began, looking up at Jim in the middle of his arms. “It just… made me realize that it has always been you, Jim.” She buried her face in his chest, embracing his warmth. “It’s always been you.” They stood with each other, for just a second. Because it was something that both of them had been hoping for, for a long time.
They wanted to just take in the moment. She looked up at him, and placed her lips on top of his. It fit. The shape of their mouths fit perfectly together, and they knew that this wasn’t wrong at all. Broken engagements, broken hearts. All of it was mended when they were with each other.
“Come on Beesley.” He said with a grin. “Let’s get you out of those wet clothes.” Pam looked apprehensive, for the first time in a while. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…”
“It’s not that I don’t want to…” Pam began, but suddenly found the words hard to say. “I just think it’d be too soon. I just broke up with my fiancée.” She reasoned, and Jim understood. “Plus, I don’t want to give Angela any more reasons to call me a hussy.” She broke the tension, and for that Jim was very grateful. He just sighed.
“I’m tired.” Pam said, going for the couch. “Should I just… sleep here?”
“Don’t be silly.” Jim said, nudging her off. “My bedroom’s down the hall. I’ll sleep here.”
“No, I couldn’t.” Pam said modestly. “I can’t just kick you out of your bed.”
“We’ll share?” He asked, hoping not to receive a no. She looked a little calmer.
“I don’t have any pajamas.”
“Mark’s girlfriend has some spares, I think.” Jim said, and Pam reluctantly agreed.
“Get fresh with me, Jim, and I’ll tell everybody you listen to New Kids on the Block.” She said, jokingly. Jim just looked at her as he lead her into the bedroom.
“Well played, Beesley. I’ll keep my hands to myself.” He said, unable to believe that all of this was really happening. It really was happening.
End Notes:
Please review! And there is more to come soon :)
Telling the Truth by WildBerryJam
May 12, 2006
He loved the feeling of having her in his arms when he woke up. And even though nothing more than kissing had happened last night, a feeling of dread still lingered in his stomach. He was transferring to Stamford. Him being with Pam now didn’t change any of that. He had to figure out how to tell her. How do you tell a girl you’ve loved forever that you took a job in another state just to get away from her?
But he had her.
It was during this thought that she began to stir. He kissed her on the forehead, and stroked her hair as she woke up. She groaned for a second, to wake herself up, and then smiled at him.
“Good morning, sunshine.” He said, and they both giggled. Now wasn’t the time to say anything. They were both happy. They were with each other, and nothing else mattered. Not jobs, or broken
engagements, or transfers. It was just Jim Halpert, in love with Pam Beesley. “Did you get enough sleep?”
“Not quite.” She joked, slipping out of Jim’s arms and up against the backboard of his bed.
“Oh come on, I don’t snore that bad.” Jim joked, suppressing the feelings of trepidation boiling in his brain. Each second that passed that he didn’t tell her the truth slowly drove him insane. Just as he opened his mouth to admit it, she perked up.
“Do you want breakfast?” She asked, not caring that she wasn’t in her house. He loved her initiative and blind optimism. His stomach growled loudly, answering the question. “I’ll take that as a yes.” She giggled, poking him on the arm. With one swift move, she swung out of bed, and onto the floor. She slipped out of the pajamas she had borrowed, and pulled back on the dress she wore last night, thinking that she needed to get her clothes. “I need a favor.” She said, turning around.
“Anything.” Jim said, sliding to the side of the bed. He looked up at her, and loved the way she looked. Even now, with matted hair, a wrinkly blue dress, still half asleep. Telling her wasn’t an easy task.
The favor she mentioned was driving her back to her old house. The house she used to share with Roy. The house that only reminded her of her ended engagement. When Jim pulled into the driveway, Roy’s truck wasn’t in the driveway. The house was empty, other than their things.
“Do you want me to come in with you?” He asked, putting his hand on her thigh. There was nothing more he could do right now than be there for her. She shook her head.
“I can handle this.” She said, confident in her own ambition. “I’m just going to get some clothes and the more important stuff.” She rationalized, and he confirmed.
“Don’t forget your Tickle-Me-Elmo.” Jim joked, breaking the tension in Pam’s face. “Those are a precious commodity nowadays.” She looked at him, with a look of fake anger.
“I won’t.” She gave him a quick peck on the cheek, and jumped out of the car. Jim sat behind,
turning up his car radio. He watched her walk into her house, and began to think of how to tell her he was moving to Connecticut.
She went through her things fairly quickly. The wine glasses sat on the coffee table, a sad reminder of the night that had unfold. The house was otherwise in an array. When she stormed out, she could hear Roy freak out, throwing things and screaming. When she finally made her way into the bedroom, she found a broken picture frame in the doorway. She bent down to pick it up. It was a picture of her and Roy, when they were just dating. Their fearful smiles and tightened grips were overwhelming. Ten years, just gone in a flash. It seemed like such a waste, but Pam had plenty of time, now that she was with Jim.
A pair of jeans, a ton of skirts and button up shirts. Sweaters, socks, underwear, and t-shirts. They all were folded neatly, and placed into a suitcase she had planned on using for her honeymoon. They had bought it new, on discount, as something practical for their life together. Now it just seemed empty and meaningless. The last thing she decided was worth taking right away was the teakettle, still sitting on the counter from the previous morning. She smiled looking at it, sitting there so strongly. It was a meaningful gift from Jim, and she had cherished it from the second she opened it Christmas day. She wrapped it up in a dishtowel hanging on the handle of the fridge, and placed it on top. She shut the suitcase, and walked back out to Jim in the car.
“Jeez, Beesley. Take long enough?” He asked in a fake annoyed tone. She smiled and nodded, and shut the door. It dawned on her that it may be the last time she ever shut the door to that house. Walking to the car, Pam felt the world spinning beneath her.
“You look nice.” Jim lied, commenting on Pam’s change of wardrobe. A gray hooded sweatshirt, jeans with a hole in the left knee, and her curly hair up in a pony tale.
“What can I say? I live for fashion.” She said, jumping into the car. She threw her large suitcase in the backseat, and Jim swung out of the driveway.
“You okay?” Pam asked after a few minutes of driving. Jim was looking distant. Of course, the idea of telling her was weighing heavily on his mind. Not now. She had just gotten her clothes from her now ex-fiancée’s house. She was homeless, and just getting out of a serious relationship. Now was not the time to tell her he was moving her away. There was never going to be a perfect time, but now was absolutely the wrong time.
“Wait, pull over!” Pam shrieked, catching Jim off guard. He worked his hardest to follow Pam’s directions, and pull over into the parking lot on the way back to his house. “Let me buy breakfast for you.” She said, pulling out her wallet from her purse. Jim looked up to see where they were parked in front of.
“McDonalds?” He said, observing the environment around him. Pam nodded at him with a smile. “Wow, Beesley. Living it up.” They both smiled at each other.
“Give me a break. I was planning a wedding. Plus, I work at Dunder Mifflin, so I’m not exactly rolling in the money right now.” She said, behind a laugh of embarrassment, and pain.
“Well, if we were to have breakfast at my house, we’d be having expired yogurt and toast.” He said, trying to raise her spirits. And so far, it seemed to be working. They both walked in to the McDonalds.
A few hours passed, they both ate sausage biscuits and sipped bad coffee. There were exactly three points in the conversation where Jim was about to tell Pam he was transferring to Stamford, but each and every time he began, her cell phone rang. Every time it rang, Pam insisted it wasn’t important, but the moment was dead. He waited for the right time to come, but somehow it didn’t.
He drove her back to his house, where they shared hours worth of conversation. Just stupid, silly stuff that they used to laugh about, but forget when the drama fell between them. It took Jim three hours before he was able to muster up the courage to tell Pam the truth. But just as Jim began to speak, her cell phone began to ring again. She looked at Jim, with a silent plea for forgiveness. He wanted to scream his confession, but it was the third time the phone had rang all day. If Pam didn’t answer it now, it would keep on ringing, and it would keep on interrupting. He nodded, and she took the phone out of her purse. With one quick motion, she opened the phone and put it up to her ear.
“Hello?” She said softly, turning away from Jim. “Michael, how did you get this number?” She turned back to Jim, confused about the source of this call. “You looked it up in emergency contacts.” She laughed with Jim, not making a sound. “Am I busy, actually” She began, but stopped immediately when Jim could hear the distant humming of Michael’s voice through the cell phone. Jim motioned for her to hand him the phone. Unsure of what to do, Pam handed him the phone. He pressed a button, and a wave of sound hit them.
“Pam, if you were a woman” Began Michael, and Jim and Pam fought to stifle their large amounts of laughter. “I mean, well, you know.” He stammered, realizing the stupidity of the sentence. “Would you enjoy laser tag?”
“Laser tag?” Jim said, his voice barely above a whisper. Explaining to Michael why he was with Pam so early in the morning would prove a difficult task. So he just stayed silent as Pam explained to Michael why taking his new girlfriend (of one day) to laser tag was not a real romantic date. Once she hung up, Pam sighed with relief. She sat down on Jim’s couch, and noticed a few boxes at the end, but she remained silent. Mark’s girlfriend had just moved in, so there was the rational explanation she sought.
Jim fought again to tell her. They had been together for three hours now, and he still hadn’t told her he was moving. Soon it was going to be too late. He opened his mouth, and there was a loud thwack as the back door opened.
“Yo Halpert!” Mark called from the door. “You still need those boxes” He began, but as he turned the corner, he found Pam on his couch, next to a very pissed off Jim. “Oh. I didn’t realize you had company.” He said with a wide-eyed grin. HE walked to Pam with an open hand. “Pam, right?” He asked, shaking her hand. They had met at Jim’s barbecue earlier that year, and it became apparent that Jim had talked about her nonstop. She nodded in response to his question.
“So, where’s your fiancée?” Mark asked curtly, trying to make polite conversation. It turned sour, and neither Jim nor Pam answered his question. “What?” Mark shrieked as Jim looked about ready to kill.
“I just broke up with him.” Pam said meekly, sounding almost proud of that sentence.
“Oh.” Mark said with quiet realization. “I’m sorry.” Jim stood up, and walked out into the kitchen. After a few seconds, Mark sat down next to Pam.
“So where you gonna stay?” Mark asked, hoping this question was a more appropriate one.
“Actually” She said, biting her lip. She waited until Jim joined them in the living room. “I was
going to ask you first, but I was kind of” She swallowed hard, staring at Jim. “Hoping I could stay here until I find my own apartment.” Both Jim and Mark looked at each other, with the kind of look you get when you know a secret someone else doesn’t know. Pam waited for either Jim or Mark to reply, but there was nothing but the awkward silence between them. Finally, Jim asked for Mark to leave, which he did. Once they were alone, Pam began to feel worried.
“Should I not have asked?” She said, the color draining from her cheeks. “I’m sorry. I should go.” she stood up, but soon realized she didn’t really have anywhere else to go. Jim stopped her.
“It’s not that I don’t want you here” He spoke slowly, still working out the kinks in his monologue. “Jan offered me a promotion.” Pam’s face immediately lit up with a luminous smile. He felt his heartstrings being tied into knots.
“That’s great!” Pam exclaimed, thinking that was the end of the story.
“It’s in Stamford.” He broke in, watching the look on her face just shift. Shift from pure joy to sadness. “Last night after you said no, I told her I’d take it.” Pam froze as Jim just looked at her. There was no feeling in her fingers, or any other part of her body. She licked her lips, waiting for the feeling to return. When her mouth felt less dry, she began to talk.
“When are you leaving?” Somehow he knew the answer, but he just couldn’t say it.
“My last day’s Friday.” He admitted after a few painful minutes. She nodded in the grim realization that Jim was leaving. He could see she was on the brink of tears. “Please, don’t. Nothing’s going to change between us. I promise you that.” He lifted her chin up with his index and pointer finger. One sad tear fell down her cheek. “Nothing will change except I’ll be in Connecticut.”
“Then why does it feel like you’re going in a different time zone?” She asked seriously, then proceeded to bury herself in his chest. The feeling was nice, and she knew that in less than a week, she wasn’t going to have that feeling any more. He’d be far away, in another building, in another city, in another state. And that just felt miles away.
“So what do you want to do today?” Jim asked, resting his head on hers, loving how right it all felt. “I could help you find an apartment. It’s only noon.” She looked up at him, and nodded. “You know nothing’s going to change between us, right?”
“I know.” She said, and for once, she knew it was true.
****
“This is it.” Pam said, looking past the gray walls and the empty rooms. She had been to three apartments, none of which were perfect. But this was it. It needed work, like paint and a good scrubbing. But it was a good one. The rent was affordable (even on Dunder Mifflin paychecks), it was right by an art supply store, and it had a great view over a park. It was perfect.
“Are you sure?” Jim said, looking into the kitchen. “It’s not very big.”
“I don’t care.” Pam jumped back, defending her find. She didn’t want big, she wanted cozy. Jim.
That’s what she wanted, and nothing else mattered.
“It’s only got one kitchen.” Jim continued, trying to discourage her. “How are you going to cook every meal of the day with one kitchen?” They both smiled at each other, and it was understood that Jim was only joking. “I’m kidding, Pam. It’s nice.”
“I know. That’s why I picked it.” She gave Jim a cocky smile. After this, she went over to the landlord, and began signing papers. They were still in the room, and Jim watched them from afar. This was not the way he had planned on spending his day. He had a week to pack up years of memories in Scranton, and the plan for this Saturday was to start on packing. But now he was here, with Pam. He still had to pack, he still had to leave. But now she was here, just for him. And that was the best thing he could think of.
End Notes:
Have no fear! There is more to come
Keeping (Some) Secrets by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
Jim's last Monday at Scranton.
May 14, 2006
Monday came faster than they wanted it to. Monday was the start of a countdown until the end. When Jim would be leaving for Stamford. When they would be apart. And Pam was dreading it for that reason, and facing up to everyone, who was sure to find out about the crumbling of her wedding before the day was over. Gossip spread like wildfire, and the office was about to burn down when this got out.
Luckily, Jim was there for her. Just like he was there for her as she painted the gray walls a vibrant shade of yellow. He was there when she put in some second hand furniture and the rest of her stuff from her old house. He was there for her the first night in her new apartment and he was going to be there for her when she told everyone the wedding was off. It wasn’t going to be exactly like that, but it would be close.
“Good morning, Pam.” Michael said, unable to come up with a witty play on Pam’s name. He just accepted his messages with a smile.
“Good morning. How was your date?” Pam asked a polite question, and Michael responded with wide eyes, and a mischievous grin.
“It was fine, thank you.” He said, turning towards the cameras. Then he avoided any more details than necessary, and ducked into the office.
“Hey Pam.” Jim said nonchalantly. They had decided for the sake of things in the office, they weren’t going to talk about them being together. She figured that since she had just broken up with Roy, that being with Jim would seem too sudden, and that he was the reason she called off the wedding. Which wasn’t the case at all. Because Roy was the reason she called off the wedding. And things never felt rushed between them. They had been best friends for four years; being more than that just seemed to come easily.
“Hey Jim.” Pam said sweetly, looking up at him with the kind of smile Angela greeted Dwight with. A smile that meant nothing to others, but leagues to them. “Did you have a good weekend?”
“Yeah.” He said, nodding. He put his messenger bag on his chair, and sat down. “You?”
“Oh, definitely.” She replied, and then jumped back in to her game of solitaire. Keeping this kind of secret would prove difficult.
Two hours passed, and there weren’t any interruptions. No conference room meetings, no spazz attacks from Michael, nothing. The quiet began to scare Jim and Pam. It was not a good sign, especially with all the drama that was to unfold in the next five days. Jim still hadn’t told Michael he was transferring to Stamford. He would be crushed, no doubt. He’d nearly broken down when they cancelled Arrested Development. And surely things would go down hill from there.
“Are you seriously going to tell him now?” Pam spoke in what she referred to as her “office voice”. Hushed tones so that no one, except for the camera, could hear what they were talking about. It was something she could tell would be used a lot in the next five days. “I mean, we’ve had a pretty quiet day.”
“It’ll give him a couple days to get over it.” Jim replied, sounding confident in his voice.
“You realize you’re not going to have to deal with him once you’re gone.” Pam said, trying to guilt trip him just because he was leaving. She had spent the entire weekend, dealing with the fact that he was going to be gone in a week. But all she could do about it now was put on her brave face.
“I know.” Jim winked at her as he began to walk away. Her face formed a very serious pout at him, and this caused him to walk into Michael’s office with a sense of a swagger.
“Jim. Jim Man. What can I do you for?” Michael asked, looking as if he had been sitting around, doing nothing all day. Typical, Jim thought to himself. He shook those thoughts out of his head, and began.
“I just wanted to talk to you for a second.” Jim said, shutting the door behind him.
“Uh oh, sounds serious.” Michael said in the gap, trying his hardest to be funny. “Do you want to
see other people?” He gave one dry laugh at his very un-funny joke. Jim was going to miss that, too.
“Sort of.” Jim said, looking down and chuckling. “I just thought I should let you know that I’m being transferred to Stamford at the end of the week.” Michael’s usual happy demeanor quickly turned into sobriety and uneasiness. “And it has nothing to do with you…”
“Oh, sure.” Michael said, his voice quickly filling with anger. “Just jump ship for a better boat.” Jim looked at the camera, confused at Michael’s sudden eagerness to use boat metaphors. “Tell me, what can I do to make you stay?” He sounded desperate. So desperate that he was actually being serious. Jim used to laugh at things like that, but he couldn’t help but feel bad for Michael.
“No, sorry.” Jim said, shrugging. “I mean, it has been a pleasure to work with you. I just think it’s time to move on.” Jim and Michael sat there for a moment, just looking at each other. Jim nodded and was about to head out the door, when Michael let out one yelp.
“Hug me.” Jim turned around, and looked at Michael. That was the kind of thing that he could’ve every easily misheard. He asked Michael for clarification, and Michael gladly obliged. “Hug me, Jim.” Jim reluctantly walked over to Michael, and stood over at his chair. Michael, on the brink of tears, latched on to him. “I’m going to miss you, Jim!” He spoke in a shrill tone, and somehow Jim felt as if he was going to miss Michael too.
“You hugged him?” Pam said, a few minutes after Jim had walked from Michael’s office. He shared all the gory details of Michael’s goodbye, and both Jim and Pam laughed until tears fell from their eyes. “Oh, that is great.”
“Yeah…” Jim said, calming down. “Well, I’m going to go sit down.” He popped a jelly bean in his mouth, and sat back at his desk. Soon, someone else would fill that desk. But no one would ever fill Jim’s shoes. Never.
“Attention everybody.” Michael said suddenly, his voice still heavy with emotion from Jim’s shocking revelation. Everybody looked up with tired faces at Michael, expecting yet another office distraction. “I thought that everybody should know…” He began, speaking slowly and staring at Jim. “That Jim is going to be transferring to Stamford at the end of the week. And that I had absolutely nothing to do with it.” Everyone didn’t know whether to laugh at Michael’s adamancy that he hadn’t pushed Jim away, or to be sad for Jim’s departure. There was one person in the office, though, whose face was very clear to read his emotions.
“Yes!” Dwight said, raising his fist and standing up. Clearly, hiding his emotions was not so easy. But he had been trying so hard to get Jim fired, and now Scranton was going to be Jim Halpert-less. And that made Dwight very, very happy.
“Oh, I’ll miss you too, Dwight.” Jim said with mock caring and raising his pitch slightly. Dwight looked disgusted at Jim’s sudden…femininity.
“You’re such a girl, Jim. I won’t miss you at all.” Dwight said, then turned back to his computer and work. Paranoia began to set in. Jim had spent nearly every day pulling pranks, making jokes, making Dwight miserable. Why would his last week be any different? So for the rest of the day, Dwight watched Jim out of the corner of his eyes, just waiting for suspicious movement. He found Jim actually doing work, all day.
“Oh my God, Pam. I am so excited for your wedding. And I know it’s only like a month away, but it’s just so awesome!” Kelly said in her normal way too fast tone as she did whenever excitement for something kicked in. All of a sudden, Kelly looked down at Pam’s ring-less hand, and exclaimed. “Oh my God, where’s your ring!” Pam froze. Would she admit the truth: that the wedding was off? Or would she make up some stupid lie, like she was having it cleaned. Time was running out. Kelly stood there, waiting for an answer. Usually with Kelly, you would just stand there for one second, and she would spin off into a verbal frenzy and forget whatever it was she was talking about. But not now. Pam swallowed hard, and admitted the truth.
“We broke up.” Pam said, her heart hanging heavy. Kelly just stood there, her mouth practically on the floor.
“Oh my Gosh, does that mean you’re not going to marry him?” Kelly began rapid-fire questions.
She had just told the entire office the wedding was off. Not directly, of course. But Kelly would soon spread the word around. The reality of it all sunk in at that precise moment. Her wedding wasn’t happening. The dizziness took a hold on her.
“Excuse me.” Pam felt herself say as she stood up and rushed to the bathroom. She ran right past Jim, who looked concerned for Pam. He followed her with his eyes until she was in the bathroom.
“Jim, did you hear?” Kelly asked, waiting for Jim to stop staring at the bathroom door. He turned to find Kelly mere inches away from him.
“Hear what, Kelly?” Jim replied, trying to calm himself down. She’s fine.
“Pam broke up with Roy.” She shared her own juicy piece of gossip. Jim then remembered he wasn’t supposed to know that.
“Really?” He lied. He’d known minutes after it happened. But appearances had to be upheld. He examined Kelly the way he would have had he not actually known.
“Totally.” Kelly looked up, and saw no one in her close vicinity. “Now that Pam’s single…” Smiling suggestively, Kelly walked away slow. Once Kelly was out of sight, a wide grin spread across his face. Pam returned to her desk after a few minutes, and Jim smiled at her. And she smiled back.
He opened up his email browser, and typed in a message asking if she was okay. She replied with a smiley face, and a yes I’m fine.
“Pam?” Angela called out in her normal, strict tone. She was standing in the doorway of the conference room. Jim looked at Pam for an explanation, and Pam stood up.
“What’s going on?” Jim asked, and Pam just shrugged.
“I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.” She said with a secretive grin. Jim pleaded for answers. Pam didn’t budge. “Sorry, but that’s not my problem.” Before Jim could reply, Pam was snatched into the conference room.
“God, I hope Michael isn’t throwing a party.” Jim said under his breath.
“Come on, guys. Jim’s leaving! We have to send him off with a real Scranton party!”
“We are not having strippers come to the office.” Angela stood her ground, frowning at Michael’s tacky idea. “I don’t think that sort of thing would be appropriate. And I’m sure Toby would agree so.”
“Well, Toby Flenderson is a pervert, so I’m sure he’d love that sort of thing.” Ryan, Pam, Phyllis and Angela all stared at Michael, who was unaware of why everyone was so offended by this idea.
“Come on, Pam.” Jim persisted between bites of ham and cheese sandwich. “You have to tell me. Is Michael…”
“What makes you think that Michael would want to throw you a party?” Pam finished his sentence, and took a bite of her mixed berry yogurt. Jim’s eyes widened with curious excitement. “What?”
“I never asked if Michael, or anybody, was throwing me a party.” Jim said, and Pam realized she had just blown the whole thing. “Wow, Beesley. You are so easy to break!” They both were grinning, and they both just ate the rest of their lunch enjoying each other’s company.
“You know, you should probably get back to work.” Jim said sternly as Pam finished up the last bites of her yogurt. She looked at him. “I mean, who knows how many phone calls you’ve missed already.” She smiled, and nodded.
“What am I going to do when you’re gone?” She said, standing up. “I mean, who is going to monitor my productivity?” Jim shrugged, unable to stop smiling. On her way out, Pam bumped shoulders with Creed, who was carrying a small bag of mung beans. Jim acknowledged Creed’s presence, and Creed took a seat next to him.
“I see you’re getting pretty close with that engaged receptionist.” He said, popping a handful of the disgusting beans into his mouth. “You know, I was once in love with an engaged woman myself.” He said, proudly. Jim nodded, completely horrified this was happening.
“What did you do about it?” Jim asked, scared to know the answer.
“I left China.” Creed said, smirking with a content smile on his face. Jim just looked at the camera, one of his signature looks stuck on his face.
***
“You know what they say. If you love them, set them free. And if they don’t come back, they’re probably just not back in town yet. They probably just lost your address. Or forgot to call, and tell you they were late.” Michael said, trying to mask his sadness of Jim’s departure. The camera zoomed in on his face as he continued with his monologue. He says quietly to himself as he runs out of his office. “I better make sure Jim has my number.”
Before We Say Goodbye by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
Jim's goodbye party.
May 18, 2006
“Oh my God, Jim. I’m gonna miss you SO MUCH!” Kelly ran up to Jim, and nearly made him spill his punch as she wrapped herself around him. “You are so great to talk to, and now I’m not gonna have anybody to talk to around here!” Jim looked up at Ryan, who was across the room from her. He felt bad for Ryan, because he just couldn’t find a way to break up with her. And as Kelly fell into another rant about the newest celebrity babies, Jim just nodded along, pretending to listen, just for old time’s sakes.
Pam hadn’t spoken to him all day. The sudden alienation seemed weird, especially due to the events that had transpired between them lately. There wasn’t a random smile, or a joke, nothing. Just awkward silence between them. When Jim’s going away part began at 3:00, she seemed to get really busy with faxes and shipping out newsletters. He knew she was just doing her job, but it was an hour later, and she hadn’t moved from her desk once. Finally, he walked over there.
“You know those phones have voice mail, right?” He said, an awkward chuckle falling from his lips to the floor.
“It all just makes this thing… final.” She let out with a single sigh. Pam looked up, swollen eyed. She’d been crying. He went back to one week from today, when Pam had just showed up on his doorstep, a free woman.
“Oh, please…”
“Is there anything I can do to make you stay?” She asked, sounding so sad. He had to keep up the secret, so he couldn’t just kiss her right there. No matter how badly he wanted to.
“I wish.” Jim replied, his voice sounding gruff with emotion. “It’s just something I have to do.”
“I can’t come with you.”
“I never asked you to.”
“My job is here.”
“I know.” Jim said, looking down. Then his eyes went up, to see if anybody was in the vicinity. They were all drinking punch and talking in the conference room. “Are you going to come?” He said, trying to lead her in there. She shook her head.
“In a minute.” She sighed, and he nodded. She waited until he was back in the conference room. She wasn’t sure if this void was from Jim’s impending departure, or if she was missing the consistency of having a steady relationship. Because whenever she was with Roy, she knew someone was always there. He may have been rude, abrasive, and sometimes callous, but he was there. Ever since she was in high school, Pam was never really alone. Pangs of guilt were soon rising in her chest. Jim was incredible. He didn’t deserve this.
She got up and made a conscious effort to stop this, right here and now. Roy had broken her heart, and that was in the past. Jim was her present, and that’s what she needed to focus on. She went over to the punch bowl, to where Jim was standing. She reached for the ladle, and her hand gently brushed his. It lingered for a second, and she could feel every knuckle tickling hers. She wasn’t sure if he did it on purpose, but it was adorable none the less. She smiled at him, and went on to fill her punch glass. It was a start. She walked over to Phyllis, who was looking quite lonely by herself along the wall.
“So, Jim.” Kevin said, walking up to Jim. He was now wearing his fedora, something he reserved for special occasions. “Did you hear about Pam?”
“Yes, I did Kevin.” Jim said, looking at the camera, and then back at Kevin. Kevin smiled as he nodded slowly.
“Do you know why she broke up with him?” He said, still grinning. Jim just shook his head, and began to walk away from Kevin. That was getting way too uncomfortable for Jim to handle. Kevin just smiled and nodded into the camera as Jim walked away.
“You know, it’s pretty weird that Pam hasn’t said anything all day to you.” Kelly said, walking back to Jim. “I think she’s going to miss you.”
“We’re friends, Kelly. We’ll always be friends.” Jim replied, and Kelly nodded. He glanced over at her, talking quietly with Phyllis and sipping on her cup of punch. She’s my best friend. Their eyes catch for a second, just one-second. But it’s a great second in time. They both shuffle, trying to break the glance.
“It’s too bad you’re moving away. You and Pam would’ve made such a cute couple.” Kelly insisted on continuing this. “You propose to her at Paris, just like Tom Cruise did with Katie Holmes. That was so romantic! I hope that’s how Ryan’s going to propose to me...” She said glancing over at Ryan, who was desperately trying to seem busy. Jim just grinned.
“That’s great, I’ll think about it.” Jim says, not trying to rush ahead of himself. They wanted to take it slow, and it was only a week after Pam ended a ten-year relationship. As strong as his feelings were for her, they just weren’t there yet. Besides, I already have that planned out. He looked over at Pam, hoping to catch her glance again. But she wasn’t in the conference room any more. She was back at her desk, going through papers again. He looked up at the clock. 5:00. But the day wasn’t quite over yet. He still had one last trick up his sleeve.
Maybe I'm Amazed by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
The Return of Agent Michael Scarn, FBI, and Jim still has one trick up his sleeve before he leaves.
Pam had been dreading the end of the day, especially having to say goodbye to Jim. She hadn’t seen him for a while, since he wasn’t at his desk like usual. Pam was getting nervous and fidgety. In order to help calm her nerves, she started to shuffle around some papers on her desk when she noticed an envelope sitting on the top of her computer.
She immediately recognized the carefully scribbled handwriting, and looked up to only Michael and Dwight left in the conference room. Had Jim already left? Did he really leave without saying goodbye? Curiosity got the best of her and she ripped open the envelope and read its contents.
Threat Level Midnight 2: The Untold Stories
FADE IN:
Catherine Zeta discovers a mysterious envelope at her desk. Her curiosity getting the best of her, she opened it and found the green card, containing the location of her next top-secret assignment.
Pam couldn’t help but giggle, remembering the time everybody stayed late for their reading of Threat Level Midnight. A million memories came flooding back into her head, each containing special meanings. Dwigt. FBI Agent Scarn. Grilled cheese. Swaying. It was so amazing the thought he had put into this. She felt foolish for thinking that Jim would ever leave without telling her good-bye. She found the green card described in the script portion, and read its contents.
Catherine ripped open the next card, reading Michael’s Scarn’s careful handwriting.
MICHAEL SCARN: (voice over)
Catherine, I have a very crucial task for you. Go to the place where we distracted the Germans with a game of Flonkerton.
CATHERINE ZETA:
But what about the phones?
MICHAEL: (Voice over, as if he can hear her)
Forget about the damn phones! This is essential to the mission!
CATHERINE:
I’ll only do it because I love you.
She gets up, and walks into the conference room, filled with the memories of when she flonkered with the best of them all, Agent Michael Scarn.
Pam walked into the conference room, ignoring the comments of Michael and Dwight. She found the envelope sitting in the middle of the table, and snatched it before Dwight could get his hands on it. It was slightly heavier than the last one. She walked back to her desk, and tore it open without even thinking about it.
Catherine opened the next clue, excited for what she would find.
MICHAEL: (voice over)
The only time I’ve never said a word to you is the day you jinxed me until I bought you a coke. The contents of this envelope include two gold medals from the FBI Olympics, which you deserve more than I can say with words. And there is also enough money for you to purchase two cans of coca cola, which you will be essential for your upcoming mission.
Pam went to the break room, and put her change into the machine for two cokes, and felt something else in the dispenser. She pulled out the cokes and another green card.
MICHAEL:
Our first kiss. You might not remember it, because you were drunk and out of your mind. But it meant the world to me, so for your next clue, go to the SOLID GOLD reminder of that great night.
Catherine walked into Agent Michael Scarn’s office, and looked under his Feddie award. Another green card.
She reluctantly waved at Michael as he walked out of the office. She sneaked into his office, finding the card under Michael’s Dundie. She tore it open and continued found the homemade certificate for second drinks redeemable the next time Jim was in Scranton. She read the card.
MICHAEL:
The final stage in your mission is to find the helicopter waiting for you on the roof, to bring you up here with me at Langley for the upcoming meet-and-greet with the other agents. I’ll be waiting.
All of the cards were now rested between the cans of coke. Pam went up the ladder, remembering the last time she went up those rungs. She was giddy with anticipation, wondering where this was all leading.
She got to the roof, not sure of what to expect. She spotted a large blue blanket lying on the floor with two plates, a basket, and Jim. His bright eyes seem to light up even more when he sees her. He stands up and walks toward her.
“I thought you left without me,” Pam said, with a hint of sadness in her voice, “but can you tell me when the Helicopter arrives?” she asks, unable to repress her smile any longer. Jim’s heart felt overjoyed knowing that he was the one who put that bright of a smile on her face. It was a smile he worried he might never see again when he applied to transfer to Stamford.
“I’m afraid your mission was compromised, Catherine Zeta, but Agent Scarn sent me in his place to pick you up and be responsible for you” Jim said. “We are to report back to headquarters. But first, we must replenish your strength before going any further on the mission: my famous grilled cheese and French-onion Sun Chips”
“A gourmet feast!” Pam exclaims, holding out the two cans of coke to add to their picnic on the roof. He opens the cans for them both and hands one to her.
He gazed in wonder at Pam. What did I do to deserve her? She’s simply amazing. Her smile, the way she bites her lip or how she plays with her necklace: no matter what she does, it makes him love her even more. He found himself getting choked up as she shyly glanced at him. He never thought that things that were once only in his dreams would ever come true. He was so grateful he had the opportunity to prove to Pam how special she is to him.
His gaze turned dark as he remembers I’m leaving. This will be the hardest thing he’s ever had to do. This is not the time, Halpert. This is for Pam. Jim gazed at Pam and realizes that he can now look at her without having to have an excuse. He’d always had to think of something witty to say to her or claim he was craving jelly beans when he wanted to have a few brief moments to stare at her radiant face. Now he had the privilege to be able to just look at her whenever he craved to, without feeling ashamed or worried that she might catch him. I’d be glad if she caught me. He thought as a devilish smirk spread across his face.
Pam notices Jim staring at her with a look of pure lust on his face. He raises his in a toast “To our future.” Their eyes never break their stare while they take a sip of the coke.
They settled in on the picnic blanket he’s laid out on the rooftop. Jim sat down with his legs spread out in front of him. She settled in-between his legs, her back resting against his chest. Her hair just reaches his chin and he can smell the sweet scent of her vanilla shampoo. Jim ran his fingers down the length of her arm, feeling the goose bumps he creates on her skin. She closes her eyes, soaking in the feeling of having Jim hold her and feeling safe; like she’s at home. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in even closer. Jim nuzzles his chin into the crook of her neck, desperately trying to memorize every detail of her before he’d be forced to part with her again.
“I don’t know what I’m going to do without you here everyday, Jim” Pam says softly.
“Me too, Pam, me too” Jim whispers quietly next to her ear. She can feel Jim’s chest move every time he breathes. “But I think I may have a temporary antidote for when you’re feeling particularly low.” Jim replies as he reaches for a flat, wrapped box. She smiles up at Jim and accepts it. She unwraps it to discover a picture frame.
It a medium-sized frame with three spaces for pictures, but two are filled. She pulls the frame closer and studies the picture on the left that is a picture she immediately recognizes from last year. At the Dundies, Phyllis went to each table and took a picture for the upcoming Dunder Mifflin newsletter. The photo shows Jim and Pam sitting closely at the Chili’s table, smiling brightly towards the camera. She giggles at the fuzzy memories from that night.
Her eyes flick over to the middle picture. Casino Night. Her memory of the night is so clear she doesn’t need the picture to remember the moment. At first, her memories of the night hit her hard when she remembers what happened afterwards with Roy. But then she looks closer at the picture. Pam is standing in front of a poker table smiling straight at the camera while Jim is staring at her. Jim’s look on his face proves to her that his feelings that he confessed that night are real. The signs had always been there, she had just tried her best to ignore them. Now I don’t have to hide anymore. She grins inwardly at how amazing and expressive his handsome face is.
Her eyes glance over to see what the last photo is, but becomes puzzled to find the last photo space is empty. She looks back at him quizzically. He says softly in her ear, “The photo from the Dundies shows our past, Casino Night is our present and this empty space: that’s reserved for our future. Because you’re my past, present, and future, Pam. I’ve tried to convince myself this was just a crush, but now I know that it’s real and true: I am madly in love with you.” He paused, looking down. They both waited for the next words to come, in anxious anticipation. “And I understand you still need time and space, but I don’t know what I’d ever do without you in my life.”
She turns around in his lap and is now facing him. “Jim, I know” she whispers and pulls his head towards her, pushing her lips gently on his. Her hands run to behind his neck and play with his soft, curly hair. He deepens the kiss and then after a while, pulls away slowly. His lips are still centimeters away from her when he sighs, “You are so gorgeous”
Just then, Pam realizes that there is music gently playing in the background. She listens closer and discovers that she’s heard this song before. She tries to remember the song and thinks of the title: “Maybe I’m Amazed” by Jem. She grabs Jim’s hands and stands up, pulling him with her. She wraps her arms around his neck and he places his large hands at the small of her back. She looks deep into his eyes and says “Sway with me, Jim” She steps closer and rests her cheek on his soft sweater. He smiles as he looks down at her. Wow... is all Jim can think of. They close their eyes and he gently sways to the beat of the song.
Maybe I’m afraid of the way I need you
Maybe I’m amazed at the way you help me sing a song
Right me when I’m wrong
Maybe I’m amazed at the way I really need you.
Maybe you’re the only man who could ever help me, baby won’t you help me understand
Maybe I’m amazed at the way you’re with me all the time
Maybe I’m afraid of the way I need you
All of her emotions from the last few weeks overwhelm her and a tear falls from Pam’s eye. She grasps his sweater tighter, making the fabric bunch as she whispers into his sweater, “Please don’t leave me.” He lifts his hand and gently pulls her chin up so she’s looking at him.
He replied earnestly: “Pam, believe when I say, no matter where we are; I’ll always be here for you. There is no where else I’d rather be.”
Space Between Us by WildBerryJam
May 21, 2006
“Pam, I have to talk to you.” A million emotions surged through Pam, most of them being anger and resentment. Roy had burst into the office that Monday morning, demanding a response from Pam. He had been trying to call her ever since the Saturday after casino night. When the liquor wore off, he realized that he needed Pam in his life. But she had been dodging his calls, so he figured this was the only way to get her to listen to him.
“No, Roy.” Pam said, standing her ground. Jim’s words were still ringing true for her. You have to fight for something. This was what she wanted. Being out of that relationship with Roy, being in one with Jim. Everything was going right for a change, and it wasn’t going to stop now just because Roy changed his mind.
“You won’t even let me explain!” Roy continued, raising his voice only slightly. Pam was the first one in the office, so they were completely alone. “I am so sorry that I hurt you. I need a second chance.” He looked down, licking his wounds. “I need you so much.”
“Did you ever think about what I need?” Pam asked, surprised she was saying things like this. Anger had never been her strong suit. But now it was just flowing out of her. “Roy, it took you three years to set a date. Then before our wedding, I find you cheating on me. What did you expect me to do, just take you back?”
“Give me another chance. I won’t screw it up.”
“I’ve given you plenty of chances.” Pam said, secretly hoping someone would come in soon. Roy’s anger was not easy to deal with.
“Is this about Halpert?” Roy said, suddenly. All the muscles in Pam’s throat just closed. “I heard some rumors about him having a crush on you…” Roy trailed off and just stared at Pam. One second. Two seconds. Nothing. “Judging by the expression, I’m going to say it is.” He wiped his mouth with his palm, and began pacing. “When he gets in here, I’m going to kick his ass like I should’ve done a LONG time ago!”
“Stop it, Roy! This has nothing to do with Jim!” Pam’s voice was a hard slap in Roy’s face. “You were the one who cheated on me. That’s why it’s over between you and me.” Roy had no idea how to reply to that. So he just looked around the room, and just stormed off. She had a feeling that he was going to come back, but it didn’t really matter at that point.
Almost as if it were planned, her AIM instantly popped up.
Jhalpert: Hey Beesley. Miss me yet?
Pam fought back the tears from her fight with Roy, and couldn’t bring herself to reply with Jim. She just switched her computer off, and buried her face in her hands. She was early, so she had a few minutes just to herself. The silence slowly ate away at her. She had Jim, but he was so far away.
There were points in her day where she regretted doing it all. Because Roy did care about her. He just hurt her so bad it was harder to see it. Then there were points in the day when she realized letting go of Roy was the right choice to make. Because she did care about Jim; so much, it hurt sometimes. Like when Jim would kiss Katy, or Roy would be a jerk. She really did love him. And that should have been enough, right?
The phone was ringing. Pam fought to contain herself enough to answer the phone. She took a deep breath, and held the phone in her hands.
“Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.” She said, surprisingly well. Well enough that it didn’t sound like she was just bawling her eyes out.
“Are you okay?” Jim said, reading right through her composed act. “I just sent you a message, and you signed off.”
“I’m fine.” Pam lied, and realized that she wasn’t ever going to fool Jim. “It’s just…” She froze, not sure of what to tell him.
“You just what? Don’t leave me hanging, Beesley!” Jim exclaimed. Pam sighed.
“I just had a fight with Roy.” She said, feeling pangs of guilt. Like telling Roy to move on was some bad deed. Jim waited for three seconds, before beginning to speak again.
“Do you want to talk about it?” He said, and Pam was surprised at his comforting ways. She almost compared him to Roy again, but then realized that there really was no point to it. Jim wasn’t Roy.
“It’s fine.” She admitted, deciding to spare him the gory details. Michael walked in, groggy from the weekend. “Please hold.” She said on the phone, trying to keep up appearances. Once Michael trudged into the office, Pam put Jim back on the line. “Sorry. Michael walked in.”
“Yeah, I should probably go. I have to get ready for work.”
“You’re still not ready?” She said, looking down at her watch. 8:45. He still had time.
“I just wanted to hear you voice.” He said sweetly, and Pam had an immediate mental image of what Jim was doing right at that moment. Sitting on his couch, still in his pajamas. A silly little grin stuck on his face.
“Have a good day.”
“You too.” Jim said in reply.
“I miss you.” Pam spoke softly, meaning every syllable. Jim just smiled, even though he knew she wasn’t going to see it.
“I miss you, too.” He replied. Pam waited for him to hang up before she put the phone back on the receiver. Hearing Jim’s voice definitely made her day a little easier.
***
Jim’s first day at Stamford felt awkward and weird. Everyone seemed to look at him like a spy or something. The first thing he missed was Pam. His desk was more towards the back, towards Josh’s office. He was nowhere near the receptionist’s desk, and then he realized it was a good thing. Then Jim began to miss the Scranton branch in general. This place was strange and foreign. He didn’t really know anybody there, and he wasn’t sure if they would even open up to him.
“So, tell me. Is Scranton as bad as I hear?” The girl with the dark brown hair who sat behind him asked casually as he sat down at his new desk. When Jim walked into the building for the first time, she had been kind of cold to him. He thought about cracking a joke to her, but she didn’t seem like the kind of person who would do that kind of thing. Josh had seemed to kind to her earlier, so he thought doing the same was a good idea. Jim leaned back, and his chair squeaked. That definitely would get annoying.
“Sorry, but I don’t talk to strangers.” Jim said sardonically, and he could’ve sworn she almost cracked a smile at that moment.
“It’s Karen.” She said, extending a handshake. Jim gladly took the peace offering, and then agreed to tell her the whole story. He decided to leave out Pam for the time being. Because Pam was something back home, just for him.
***
“So…” Kevin said, standing at Pam’s desk, waiting for the copy machine to stop. “You think Jim has a new girlfriend up at Stamford yet?” Pam opened her mouth, determined to talk. But somehow, she just couldn’t find the words. She wanted to mention that he already had one, but she wasn’t ready for that kind of thing right now.
“It’s really not my business, Kevin.” Pam said professionally. Kevin just nodded slowly.
“I bet she’s hot.” Kevin replied, then took his papers out of the copy machine. Pam just shook her head in disgust, and tried to brush off his inappropriate comments. The self-conscious part of her couldn’t help but wonder if there was someone up at Stamford prettier than her. Not that Jim would ever do anything. He wasn’t that kind of a guy. When she was with Roy, he would never stop looking at other girls. Of course, now she knew how bad it had gotten with Roy, and felt bad for comparing the two.
“What’s that?” Angela said, pointing to Pam’s new picture frame. She had spent many hours deciding whether or not to put it on her desk. It was hard to say they were just friends when she had a beautiful photo spread of just them together. She had the yogurt lid medals hanging along them. She remembered every single word of what Jim told her as he packed up his boxes.
“Who’s going to keep me entertained now that you’re leaving?” Pam asked, trying to choke back the tears. He just shrugged, looking a bit weepy.
“I’m sure you’ll think of something.” He paused, holding back all the fear in his eyes. She was starting to cry, and he didn’t like to see her like that. He lifted her chin up with his pointer finger. “Whenever you miss me...” He stopped again, feeling ridiculous that he couldn’t finish a sentence around her. “ I’ll always be there, Pam. I’ll always be there.”
“It’s a picture frame.” Pam said, snapping herself out of her reverie. She hoped the simplicity of the answer would be enough for Angela. She didn’t really feel like explaining it to her.
“I knew that.” Angela snared, moving her head, trying to see the pictures. “Who is that in the picture?” Before Angela could figure it out, Pam just snapped the frame face down. “Fine.” Angela said sternly, walking back to her desk.
Once Pam was alone at her desk, she flipped the frame back on its feet. She looked at Jim’s picture, recalling every little trait about him. His eyes, brilliant and pensive. His skin, smooth and supple. And she closed her eyes, trying to bring him back to her. He was back in his desk, feet propped up on the desk, chatting on the phone. Dwight was freaking out because Jim put his keys in Jell-O, and Michael was doing nothing about it. Jim winked at Pam, and she felt shudders throughout her body when he did that. He walked up and picked out a few jellybeans, catching a quick glance with her. Everything was normal.
“Pam. Come on, no falling asleep on the job.” Michael broke in, snapping Pam out of her dream. Dwight’s keys were sitting safely in his desk, free from their Jell-O cage. Michael was still doing nothing. The jellybean jar was empty, with no hopes of ever being refilled, because it was Jim’s favorite candy. And Ryan was sitting at Jim’s desk, doing the paperwork Jim used to do. And Jim felt so far away, she could barely remember what it was like being with him every day.
She didn’t want to open her eyes, because it meant that Jim wasn’t going to be there. Sometimes opening your eyes is the first step.
End Notes:
Let me know what you think :) I'd love it
The First Date by WildBerryJam
May 26, 2006
She patted down her dress, pressing the wrinkles away. This was a compulsive habit she did whenever nerves got the best of her. Impromptu ironing was happening a lot tonight. She was driving to a city caught in the middle of Scranton and Stamford. They agreed on some little Italian restaurant, and tonight was their first official date together. Technically, it was their third. The first was the lunch date at Cugino’s when Pam first started at Dunder Mifflin. The second was the night on the roof, with the grilled cheese and the swaying. Officially, thought, tonight was the first date. And Pam was still nervous about it.
Her eyes darted quickly to the mirror, checking her makeup for the seventeenth time in the whole drive there. Afraid she was looking too whorish, she immediately regretted putting on lip-gloss. It was too much, she reminded herself. She was going to show up looking like a clown with all this makeup on, and he was going to be so calm and casual. There was no point wiping it off now, though. She sighed and pulled into the parking lot of the restaurant.
Just breathe. She pulled the keys out of the ignition, and set them inside her small black handbag. She looked in the mirror again, for one final check. Everything seemed to look as good as it would get. She smoothed out her dress, and opened the car door. She took two steps out of the door, and another car door slammed down the lot. A voice called out suddenly.
“Take you long enough, Beesley?” Jim’s voice echoed in the empty night, and Pam swung around to see him there. He was rendered speechless, as she seemed to move in slow motion before him. He wanted to take in every little detail about her. The way her hair fell down to her shoulders in soft, loose curls. The way her dark green dress hugged every curve on her body, accentuating every perfect dip in her figure. The look in her eyes as she smiled at him, and it was like there was nobody left in the world but the two of them. She is too good for me. He wanted to keep this moment in the archives of times he was speechless in the presence of her. He wanted the look to last forever.
She brushed up against him, waiting to be lead. Instinctively, she found the perfect spot under his arm, resting just west of his shoulder. He rested his arm along her back, brushing past her curly hair, feeling the soft fabric of her dress and the even softer feeling of the bare skin on her arms. They walked, curved into each other, loving the feeling of being close. This was comfortable.
“So what is going on in Scranton?” Jim asked softly as he flipped through the menu.
“Michael officially has a girlfriend.” Pam said, remembering the mental list she’d made of things to catch him up on.
“Wow.”
“I made it to the difficult level on Sudoku.”
“Congratulations.”
“And I’ve convinced Dwight that you were an undercover officer sent to make sure he was following the codes of volunteer Sheriff deputies.” Jim let out a chortle when she said this, causing Pam to nearly spit out her sip of water.
“Wow, Pam. I’ve really missed out on a lot, haven’t I?” He swirled his water glass around, the ice clinking around in his glass, then looking back at her.
“You weren’t the only person missing things.” She uttered, looking straight at him. The emotion dripping from her voice. The moment of silence between them was not as nerve wracking as Pam once thought it was going to be. They just locked into each other, totally being there for each other. “I keep trying to watch Trading Spouses…” She broke, but Jim interrupted by throwing the cloth napkin at her. “Hey!” She exclaimed with a luminous grin.
“How about we just enjoy this night?” He said with a saccharine sound to his voice.
“Deal.” She vowed, noticing little details about him she never noticed before. How when he smiled, every part of his face looked happy. And how his eyes sparkled whenever she looked at him.
“You look really beautiful tonight.” He said, not quavering at all. She looked down, her cheeks turning red with blush. He put his hands on top of hers, smoothing them out with his touch. “Really, you look...” Before the sentence was finished, the waiter arrived with their plates of pasta. But their eyes never left each other’s once.
***
After dinner, they took a walk down the strip. A block of walking separate steps went by, and Pam looked at him lovingly, and slowly slipped her hands into his. His palms were warm and sweaty, but somehow that didn’t matter. She liked the feeling of his fingers entwined in hers, and she wasn’t letting go.
“Dinner was great.” She broke the silence, and he nodded in agreement.
“Not as great as you.” He said sincerely, and a happy breath of relief fell through her body. This was her first real date after Roy, and it seemed to be going effortlessly. She wanted to remain frozen in this moment forever.
“Now, I’m going to ask you a question, and I need you to be honest.” Pam said, unfreezing from their stance. They began walking down the street a little farther. “Do you promise you’re not going to answer sarcastically or anything?”
“Why would I do that?” Jim asked, and Pam just looked at him. “I promise, I will answer your question honestly.” He said, holding up his free hand in pledge. She nodded slowly, finally believing him.
“Why me?” She asked, thinking about how stupid her question sounded. He was probably thinking the same thing about her question, but she really needed to know. “You are smart, attractive, and so sweet. You could’ve gotten any girl. So why me?”
“Why did I fall in love with you?” Jim clarified her question, and ran his free hand through his hair. He sighed, and looked down at her. “The better question is, why didn’t I fall in love with you? You’re so beautiful, sometimes it hurt.” He stopped, and Pam felt the wind knocked out of her. “You just get everything. If I make a joke, you’re there laughing. If I’m hurting, you’re there to make me feel better. You’re just, simply amazing Beesley.” He said, abruptly stopping once more. He brought his body closer to hers, to the point where they were sharing the oxygen between them. Both of them went tense. He just watched her react, looking everywhere but up at him. She bit her bottom lip, finding a new fascination with her shoes. “Is something wrong?” He asked. She had started to turn gloomy, and Jim was terrified he had said something upsetting. When she didn’t reply, he lifted up her chin with his fingers.
“I can’t explain it.” She began breathlessly, and Jim ran his hands up her arms until they rested on her shoulders. He lingered a little while, and Pam continued. “But I am so afraid.”
“Of what?” Jim said, slowly running out of oxygen. She licked her lips real slow, and sucked in another gulp of air.
“The whole time I was with Roy...” She began, but noticed Jim winced at his name. “Things started out great. But the more time we spent together, the more I wasn’t sure if I wanted to.” His hands were still on her shoulders, his body close enough where they were touching.
“Don’t.” Jim interrupted before Pam could finish the parable. “This is different, Pam. This is light-years away than what happened between you and Roy.” He had managed to choke out Roy’s name, even though Jim hated connecting the image of Pam and Roy together. “I’m not going to let this be anything like what happened between you guys. I would never hurt you.” Pam’s eyes became misty as he continued with his amazing monologue. His hands ran up to the sides of her neck, and craned his head towards her ear. “I promise I never want to hurt you. Ever.” As he whispered, his cheek rubbed against hers, and the intimacy of that whisper was overwhelming.
Pam closed her eyes as he brought his lips over to hers. The kiss was indescribable. The kind of kiss that froze time, and made you forget about everything and everyone on the planet. As she placed her hands on his chest, feeling the tenseness in his muscles, he ran his fingers along her back. Their closeness had never been met before with such passion. They were completely there, for once.
“Thank you.” She murmured as he pulled away softly. They were still inches away from each other, feeling each other’s breath on their cheeks.
“For what?” He asked naively.
“For being so incredible.” She said while she gently pressed her lips against his again. She pulled her head away for a second. “For giving me such a wonderful first date.” She proclaimed before pulling Jim closer and melding her lips to his. “ For just being you, Jim Halpert.” Before she could pull him back in, he was already leaning in and kissing her passionately. Feeling out of breath, Jim reluctantly drew back and grinned at her. He pulled his hand down from her hair and intertwined their fingers once more; the connection between them was enough to make him feel dizzy.
“It’s a long drive.” He said, hinting towards them finding a hotel room. She looked down at his watch, regretful that she hadn’t made plans for this kind of situation. “And I’m not trying to pressure you or anything…”
“Not yet.” She said, leaning in towards him as they began walking again. “I don’t give on the first date, Jim. I’m not easy.”
“Well, I’ve heard another story from Angela.” Jim said, continuing the joke between them. “Apparently, you are quite the hussy.”
“I am not!” Pam shrieked, not quite sure if he was serious or not. It didn’t matter either way. She loved hearing his soft laugh. And if this was what it took for her to hear it, she would allow Angela to call her a hussy for the rest of eternity. The thought of not hearing him laugh again, or even seeing him smile, drove her crazy. She took it in while she could.
“So, should we head back to the parking lot?” He asked, dreading the end of this night. He had never had a date like this with any other girl before. He had a trifling feeling he would never want to have another date with any other girl ever again. Because she would never be like Pam.
She nodded, tightening her grip on Jim’s hands. The night was surreal. She had never been out with anyone before that lead her to feel faint and weak in the knees. It was becoming harder for her to walk down these empty streets with him. She wouldn’t mind if Jim had to carry her. Unsure of what she was supposed to do, or say next, they walked in bittersweet silence until they reached the parking lot.
In that moment, he hated the sun. Watching her float on her ethereal cloud to her car, to drive off far away from him, was unbearable. Morning had to come, taking Pam away from him. Morning brought the rift between Stamford and Scranton, him and her. But for the time being, he had memories to get him by. And for now, that had to be enough. He watched her drive away, a smile permanently painted on her face. That alone would give him enough motivation to get through the next year and a half.
When she turned the keys into ignition, her thoughts still with Jim, a soft song began playing on the radio. She recognized it almost instantly, as the song she danced with Jim on the roof. Paul McCartney’s voice rehashed the memories on the roof. The way he held her close as they danced. The feeling of his sweater, and her hips brushing up against his. Every single emotion that ran through her that night was back, and even more vivid then before. Suddenly Connecticut didn’t seem that far away anymore.
Making an Effort by WildBerryJam
June 8, 2006
The tense feeling in her chest just wouldn’t subside. She had looked down at different art school brochures a thousand times, desperately trying to convince herself that her art was practical. Every time she had mentioned it, Roy told her that it was just a silly ambition. Art wasn’t going to pay the bills, he would say. Art was a waste of time, he would say as he popped open another and put on yet another football game, getting out of the conversation he never really wanted to have.
The feeling intensified as Pam thought back on all the times she used to do this with Roy. Argue her point that her dreams were important. It wasn’t until that moment she realized now she was just arguing with herself. There was nobody there to tell her that she shouldn’t follow her dreams. She was telling herself that her aspirations were worthless. She used to have goals. She used to have something to long for. Now
she just had a couple of art brochures and a paper shredder running. Immediately, she was back at the job she had taken to be close to Roy. She looked down once more at her identity, and with one foul swoop, threw the brochures into the shredder. The basket filled with bright orange and blue shreds, and there was nothing more she could do than shut the shredder off.
Two hours passed slowly, and in that time she had accomplished nothing. A game of sudoku, and exactly 27 different thoughts of Jim in Stamford. Only one thought of the shredded art brochures, but the ringing of the phone quickly silenced that.
“Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.”
“Hey Pam.” He said, and she instantly knew it was Jim on the other line.
She sighed contently. “Hey.”
“Did you get the mail yet?” He asked, getting giddy with anticipation. She, on the other hand, turned sour. She had opened his letter, giving her encouragement to pursue her art. It was something she had always talked about doing when she was with Roy, but he was always four square against it. She sighed.
“Yeah.” She said, looking down morosely.
“And…?” He pursued, hoping he had pushed her in the right direction. It was something she was passionate about. And she was good at it, too.
“I don’t think so.” She admitted, defeated. Jim sat in his chair, stunned. That was not the response he was hoping. “I mean, I just don’t think now is the right time.”
“When is there ever a right time to do anything?” Jim let out, sounding slightly bitter. “Pam, you are so good. You shouldn’t be stuck at some dead-end job. You deserve to be doing something better.”
“Are we really going to have this fight?” She asked, lowering her voice only a little. The once excited expression on her face suddenly turned to anger. “Again?”
“Don’t get angry, Pam. I was just trying...”
“I’m capable of making my own decisions.” She snapped, remembering all the things she used to fight with Roy about. She could’ve sworn she heard Roy’s voice when Jim said that.
“I know that. I’m sorry.” He admitted, trying to wave his white flag. He didn’t want to see her angry, or even think about her sitting at her desk, steaming at the thought of him. Even though when she got angry, her cheeks got flushed, and there was a sort of silent urgency in everything she did. The way she spoke, the way she stared at you, the way she shuffled around papers to make herself distracted. “I just thought it would be a good idea.”
“I can’t do it.” She sighed, resting her hand on her forehead. “I’m sorry, but it’s just not the right time.”
“Don’t give up, Pam.” He said softly, trying not to be overheard by his Stamford coworkers. “You have real talent. Don’t waste it by sitting behind the receptionist’s desk.”
She felt the anger rising from her feet, to her hands. Without finishing her conversation, she slammed the receiver back on the base. It left a resonating crack throughout the office, and all eyes were on her. She was shocked she had done something like that, but she didn’t need him telling her what to do. He wasn’t perfect, either. He’d made a lot of mistakes, and he had no right to tell her what to do. Feeling the pressure of everybody staring at her, she strutted off into the bathroom.
She hung up in her. He was just trying to encourage her, and she hung up on him. He knew better than to call her back right then, it would probably result in her hanging up on him again. She just needed some time to relax. He had to give her space.
“Hey.” Karen said, walking towards his desk. He looked up at her, and smiled. “Did you have plans for lunch?” He thought about Pam, angry up in Scranton. He wished he could just talk to her, explain that he didn’t want to get her angry. And that he would support her, whatever her decision was. But he knew now wasn’t the time. He looked up at her, with an excited look in her eyes. The truth was, he could go for some lunch.
“Sure.” He said, grabbing his suit jacket. “Where are we going?”
Her time spent in the bathroom was a productive one. After countless minutes of being so angry with Jim for trying to force this art thing on her, she realized Jim wasn’t pushing at all. He was taking her hand softly, leading her in the right way. And once again, she had screwed things up. She had been the one doing the pushing, and now they were going to be locked up in this stupid argument for the rest of the day. She didn’t want to be angry with him—she was just angry with herself for giving up so easily. Being with Roy had become her identity. She was always the fiancée, the girlfriend, the something. She was never Pam. Now she needed to find herself, and clearly those art schools were a step in the right direction.
She spent her lunch break on the computer, looking up different programs in the area. Her indecisiveness became a major problem, because every single one of them looked like a good idea. When she finally settled on a weekend seminar on drawing and illustration, she took a giant step with an online signup sheet. With each letter she typed up, she felt a little freer. But when the final step came up, she panicked. Was it too fast? Was she rushing into something that may not lead to anything? She looked down in panic, at her own little piece of Jim. The way he stared at her that night was astonishing. He had taken such a big step that night when he told her how he really felt. Now it was time for her to do the same. He had dared her to move, and for once, she was going to. She hit submit on her online application, with such pride and passion. She was walking in the right direction. Sick of fighting with Jim, and desperate to tell him she was going to sign up for some art classes after all, Pam picked up the phone and dialed his cell.
“Hey, can you get that?” Jim called from the hostesses stand, picking up their tab. His cell phone was ringing, and Karen was closer than he was. She nodded.
“Hello?” Karen said dignified. There was no response. “Hello?”
“Um, is Jim there?” Pam replied, stunned that a woman was answering Jim’s personal cell phone.
“Yeah, he’s here. Hold on a second.” Karen expressed, handing the phone off to Jim as he sat back down.
“This is Jim.” But by the time he uttered those words, there was nothing but a dial tone. It was weird how somebody just called for him, then hung up when... Karen... Answered the phone. He immediately knew who had called, and buried his head in his hands at this response.
“What’s wrong?” Karen asked, noting his sudden disposition.
“Nothing.” Jim replied, kicking himself as he thought of what Pam was thinking about the situation right about now. She was going to think he was on a date with another girl. And Pam had just talked to the other girl. This was not good.
Another girl had answered his cell. Another girl, that sounded much more intelligent and much prettier, answered his cell, which meant that they weren’t just in the office. She could hear clattering drinks, laughter. They were in a restaurant, eating lunch, having fun together. Jealous rippled throughout her body as she thought of what they were doing. He was probably telling her his clever little anecdotes about his childhood and what Scranton was like. She was probably shamelessly flirting, laughing at every single joke. He was probably not even thinking about her anymore.
“Are you okay?” Phyllis broke into Pam’s thoughts, with a caring tone. Pam jumped a little, and looked up slowly at Phyllis. She reluctantly nodded. “Are you sure?”
“Not really.” Pam said, breaking down. Phyllis offered her a sympathetic ear. “It’s kind of hard to explain, but I called...somebody special, and another girl answered the phone.” Phylis let out a small grin at this.
“If you’re talking about who I think you’re talking about, you should be fine.” Phyllis alluded, winking at Pam. She was so comforted by this, she couldn’t help but smile. “You should call him back. It’s probably just a misunderstanding.”
“Thanks.” Pam choked out, overwhelmed with all of her emotions. Phyllis nodded, and walked slowly back to her desk. She didn’t want to seem conspicuous. Calling up Jim right away would seem pathetic and desperate. Plus there would be the unwanted addition of everybody overhearing the conversation. So she would wait.
“Do you want to talk?” Karen said after some silent time between her and Jim. Things had been going great (for once) and all of a sudden, he just froze up. She thought he liked him. What was happening?
“It’s fine.” Jim reassured her for the sixth time since their lunch. He wasn’t completely sure if it was Pam that had called him, but he was pretty sure about it. He felt guilty. Out on a date with a girlfriend back in Scranton; it definitely wasn’t in keeping with the promise he had made to Pam on their first date. I’ll never hurt you. He was a hypocrite, and this was proving it.
“So what are you doing this weekend?” Karen broke the awkwardness between them. Jim thought about it, remembering what the date was. Saturday was a big day for him, but it had to be a complete surprise.
“Nothing much, really. Probably just going to hang out or something.”
“Maybe we could hang out together.” Karen insinuated, hoping Jim was getting the hint. Lately, she had been developing a major crush on him. And she wasn’t the kind of girl who just silently swooned for someone. She went in there, in a blaze of glory.
He wanted to tell her no. Crush all hope. But he was still getting to know everybody around Stamford, and he didn’t want to have that awkward tension between them. There still would be. He just shrugged, and stared off into space. He couldn’t help but sit there, thinking about the benefits of being back in Scranton, Pennsylvania.
***
Closing time. Everybody slowly filed out of the office, wasted from their tedious day of Michael’s antics. Pam ducked into the bathroom, hoping the camera crew would be gone by the time she left. Once the office was clear, Pam sat down at her desk, staring at the phone. The numbers teased her. Just call him already. She had been suffering all day, and hearing his voice would likely cure that. Finally filled with courage, she picked up his phone. She wasn’t quite sure why, but she dialed his work phone. With no surprise, she got voice mail. Hopefully that would make it easier. “Hey Jim, it’s me.” She sighed, slowly deciding what to tell him. She took one finger and played with a loose curl on her shoulder. “I want to give you the benefit of the doubt. I’m probably missing something here. But you have to understand why I’m upset. I mean, I called your cell phone and another girl answered. You have no idea how much that hurt me. But like I said, I’m not going to jump to any conclusions until I talk to you. So... call me.” She finished up, feeling better having dumped all her lingering emotions. Now all she could do was wait for him to call back. And that was the hardest part.
Impossible to Ignore by WildBerryJam
June 10, 2006
The first thing she noticed as she woke up was the calendar, hanging on the wall, taunting her. She could remember where the big, red circle used to be around this day, and how many times she had looked at it with pure elation. The second thing she noticed was how badly she wanted to just fall back into her bed, forgetting every little detail about the past week. From the times Michael uttered inappropriate comments to her, to the times she desperately wished Jim would call her back.
It was supposed to be her wedding day. If things had been different, she’d be sleeping in her old bed, dreaming of this morning. She would be waking up to nerves instead of the buzzing of her alarm clock. She would spend the morning sitting in her kitchen as her friend did her makeup. She’d listen to her mom, her grandma; all give her advice about what marriage is really like. She’d sigh in bliss at the thought of Roy, and still be completely nervous that Jim wasn’t actually going to be there. She would’ve been thinking how badly she wanted her best friend to be there. But now she knew how she just wanted him to save her. Save her from marrying Roy, from leading “that life” of soundless mediocrity. She would’ve been in bed, wishing how things could’ve been different.
And now they were. Things were different. She was in a tiny apartment, haunted by the memories of how many times she had been alone in it. She was lying in bed, hating herself for letting this fight with Jim go on for so long. The only thing that had stayed the same between the two was how she was in bed, waking up to nerves instead of her alarm clock.
She pulled herself out of bed after a half hour of thinking to herself. Rubbing her eyes, she noticed the alarm clock sitting on her end table. 7:15. She rolled her eyes, and tightened the loose ponytail dangling from the top of her head. Wandering into the kitchen, she grabbed a box of Honey Nut Cheerios from the cupboard. She looked over at the answering machine, hoping that she had missed a call sometime between midnight when she fell asleep, and now. She desperately wanted that red number to be flashing, but it stood stationary. Two days. It had taken him two days to call back, and every hour that passed without a phone ringing, she hated the silence even more.
She turned on the radio, hoping it would be a good distraction from the emptiness of her apartment. The soft guitar chords of “With or Without You” began, leaving her on the floor, enveloped in memories. Michael had insisted on everybody seeing his video he’d made for corporate the day before Valentine’s Day. She sat down next to Jim in the conference room, waiting for something horrible to happen. Every time something on screen came up, he’d turn to her and they’d laugh with each other. Just small giggles, not trying to be too upfront with it. The song seems so relevant now. She looked over at the phone, still taunting her. He still hadn’t called.
It was about noon when she decided she wasn’t going to spend the entire day feeling sorry for herself. This day was a blessing in disguise. If she hadn’t caught him on casino night, she may never have caught him. She would be married to a man who was cheating on her. The heartbreak of ending an engagement was nothing compared to ending a marriage. So she wasn’t going to let herself feel bad all day. She went into her room, and pulled on a pair of jeans and a gray t-shirt. It wasn’t quite the most flattering outfit, but it was comfortable. Comfort was key.
She pulled out her sketchbook, and some oil pastels. It was her favorite medium to draw with, because the colors easily blended into each other, forming one organized mess of hues. She held the black one in her hand, and began drawing abstract lines. Up and down, in frivolous patterns, until they were all connected, and she realized it was a wedding dress. Her wedding dress. The dress she would’ve been wearing today in some alternate universe. She tore out the page. A new page was opened.
A pair of eyes. She shaded them in just right, with a perfect blend of blue and green. They outreached to a jaw line, with strong definition. She highlighted the cheeks, with rosy shades of pink. A perfect, humble blush that blended into a perfect smile. Half smiling, half frowning, this drawing was slowly becoming a man with definite features. She linked his features together, and finished it off with a head of hair. Brown and sloppy, messed around his head. She took a step back, and felt as if she were staring at him again. The man gazing at her was just a work of art, but she felt all the blood rush to her head then. He always made her dizzy like that, and now she didn’t have to feel guilty about it. She tore out the page, and finding the folder sitting on her desk. She slipped it in the folder, among her other art works. Doodles on post-it notes she had done, cartoons on the back of lunch bags, paintings she had done as practice. All of them different interpretations of him that she felt were too important to be ignored.
The phone was ringing. She had forgotten what it had felt like to hear it ring, and she raced faster than ever to the receiver.
“Hello?” She said, building up the anticipation in her mind. He was calling her back. She could feel it.
“Hey honey.” It was Pam’s mom. And she really did love her mom, but she couldn’t help but feel a little deflated that it wasn’t Jim’s voice on the other line. “How you holding up.”
“I’m fine.” Pam sighed, sitting down on the couch. “I was just getting some sketching done.”
“That’s nice. But I mean, how are you doing today?” She asked, hinting towards Pam’s cancelled wedding.
“Not so good.” Pam accepted that she wasn’t going to fake anything when it came to her mom. She threw herself down on the couch, and swung her legs over the side. “I miss him.”
“Pam, you dumped him for a reason.” Her mother replied in a rigid tone of voice.
“Not him.” Pam sighed. “I miss Jim.”
“Well of course you miss him, he’s your best friend.” Pam’s tongue quickly became attached to the roof of her mouth. A combination of her paralyzing fear of moving too fast and her denial of reality had lead her to not tell her own mom about her new relationship.
“There’s something I need to tell you...” She began, unable to think of what to say.
“You love him, don’t you?” Her mom said, not missing a beat. One second of silence. Two seconds. “I’ll take that as a yes. How long?”
“I don’t know, mom.” She recalled the conversation she had on casino night. How Pam realized she kind of loved Jim. Not in the way that he loved her, but an emotion nonetheless. Her mom had supported her, whichever way she decided to go. If she wanted to stay with Roy, her mom was there. If she was going to pursue Jim and her dreams, her mom had her back. “It just sort of happened. But we had this big, stupid fight. And he hasn’t called back.” She paused, biting her lip. She wanted nothing more than to have him call her back. “I’m not so sure he’s going to call back.”
“I’m sure he’ll call.” Pam’s mom began a monologue, but the knocking of the door distracted Pam. She grabbed the cord and unit attached to it, tightened her grip on the phone, and made her way towards the door. The floorboards creaked as she walked over towards the door. Before she gripped the doorknob, the phone slipped from her grasp. It was in her hand as she opened the door. She looked up, and met his gaze.
“Hi.” He said, breathlessly as she opened the door. In his strong hands he held a small bouquet of white flowers, shaking with his nerves. He looked tired from the long drive, but it was all worth while when he looked into her deep stare. The look in her eyes told him how bad she had wanted him to call her back, and the surprise of this arrival was totally worth it. Her face did not crack with a smile, she just stood there shocked by him being there. The phone slowly dropped from her ear, and it fell on the floor with a loud crack. She moved swiftly into his arms, burying herself in his compassion. His t-shirt melded with hers, leaving their flesh upon each other. She gripped him closer, never loosening it up. “I take it you’re glad to see me.” He said, his smile going from ear to ear as she slowly drew away from him.
“You have no idea.” She said, forgetting about the phone. This was leagues better than a phone call. Having him there, especially today, was well worth the silence. She just sighed, pleased to be in his presence.
“Hello?” The distant voice murmured from the floor. It took her a second to realize that she had dropped the phone, and she rushed to pick it up.
“Mom?” She said, not waiting for a response. “Listen, I have to go. Yeah, I’ll call you soon. Bye.” She rushed through her words, waiting so she could hang up. Her mom was right.
“Are these for me?” Pam asked as Jim still stood in her doorway, holding the white flowers.
“Funny you should ask. They’re actually for Dwight and I was kind of hoping you could give them to him for me.” He said with a slick smile.
“Get in here, Halpert, before I wipe that grin off your face.” She said, pulling him playfully by the shirt. Dutifully, he walked in. He went in under her sink, looking for a vase to put the flowers in.
“I’m sorry I didn’t call.” He said, voice muffled from the sink. He successfully retrieved the short, clear vase and set it down in the sink to be filled with water. “I figured it’d be a nicer surprise if I just showed up at your door one day. Especially today.” He continued, and she felt the tender spot in her heart being tickled just a little bit.
“It’s fine.” She said, taking a seat. After her white flowers were in their vase, and on the table, he took a seat next to her.
“So how are you doing?” He asked, genuinely concerned about her. She had a hint of sadness in her eyes, probably about today.
“Better.” She said, gazing deeply at him. “Now.” Things like that made him smile, both internally and externally.
“I’m sorry.” Jim said, grabbing her hands. He smoothed them out, feeling the softness of her touch. “I shouldn’t have gone to lunch with Karen.”
“I know.” She cut him off, assuming that this was an admission of his wrongdoing. “I just got so angry, I wasn’t thinking clearly.” They both tittered awkwardly, instantly not breathing.
“You are such a girl, Beesley.” He said with a sarcastic smile. She jokingly slapped him across the arm, and he laughed lightly. He dug his hands into her side, beginning to tickle her. She laughed softly, but couldn’t help but think of all the times Roy used to do that to avoid arguments.
“Don’t.” She said suddenly very serious. “Please.” Jim put his hands up in the air, immediately stopping. He looked at her with his big eyes, begging for an apology. “I’ll forgive you if you buy me lunch.”
“You drive a hard bargain, Miss Beesley.” Jim said, standing up. Pam followed his lead, standing from her living room. She switched the radio off, appreciating the silence between them. She could hear every syllable he spoke. She liked it that way.
“I’m sorry about blowing up at you about the art school thing.” She said as they walked down the street. There was an old diner a couple blocks down, and Jim had been driving for so long that the idea of walking didn’t bother him at all. Besides, it was an excuse to walk close to Pam and maybe even hold her hand. “You were right. And that’s why I’ve signed up for a couple courses.”
“That’s great, Beesley!” He said, playfully tugging at her shoulder. She nearly lost her balance at this, but she persevered, keeping her steps intact. “Believe me, you are going to blow them all away.”
“I don’t know about that...” She trailed off modestly. He just looked at her.
“I do. You’re great at it, Pam. Don’t ever doubt yourself.” She grinned, and leaned in closer towards him. “Now, I have to know...”
“What?”
“If you’ve kept the Dwight prank torch burning.” He said with a childish grin. Getting him excited with pranks was an easy way to break the ice whenever times got tense.
“Let me tell you, it’s been a pretty crazy week...” She opened, realizing they had another three blocks to go before they were at the restaurant.
The dinner was old school with jukeboxes, tin walls, and the whole nine yards. They picked a booth in the corner, far away from the emptiness of the diner. Their feet brushed up against each other as they sat in silence.
“I still can’t believe you drove all this way just to be here.” Pam sighed; simply astonished he would do such a grand gesture. She knew better than to expect less than amazing from him.
“What can I say, I love Scranton.” He replied, and then quickly picked up a menu. Because if he would’ve kept staring at her, things would’ve gone haywire. “I hear this restaurant has the best ham and cheese sandwich.”
“Don’t you ever get sick of eating the same sandwich every day?” She asked, chuckling to herself. He looked away from the menu, shaking his head.
“I could never get sick of something so amazing.” His eyes were stitched to hers.
“Are we talking about sandwiches or people?”
“Both.”
“I always knew you had a thing for Dwight.”
“Just pick a sandwich, Beesley.” He said with a smile.
They had chewed their sandwiches, exchanging stories from Stamford and Scranton. Jim told her all about Andy, and Pam told him how she had found new ways to torture Dwight. Jim had fulfilled his promise of buying her lunch, and he had managed to accomplish his goal of making her smile just once. And she had easily forgotten today was the day she was supposed to get married.
Disclaimer still applies
September 1, 2006
She needed a vacation. It was more than a kind-of want, or a sort-of thing. She needed to get far away from the office before the insanity consumed her. The two-month break from the documentary was supposed to be a blessing. In the second week of June until September, the camera crews got a break, and things were supposed to quiet down. Michael’s vamped-up antics were supposed to calm down. People were supposed to start acting normal.
Acting normal. That wasn’t possible in this office.
Michael insisted on setting her up on blind dates. She thought he’d gotten the clue after he was trying to get her to go to dinner with Todd Packer, and she politely told him there was no chance whatsoever. But he didn’t. Soon he’d be bringing in people from around his condo, even though they had girlfriends. Soon he ran out of people to bring, and he made his move several times. Pam told him no, but he did not forgot all about it. Kelly had tried to do the same thing. She’d go on for hours about how cool her neighbor the cartoonist was. She’d talk about how badly Pam needed to go on a double date with her and Ryan. Eventually she gave up, and found another celebrity to rant about.
When Jim called her on Wednesday, giving her a break, she didn’t have to think twice.
“My uncle is having this big labor day weekend thing, and my mom is trying to browbeat me into coming.” He said on the phone that morning. She shifted around, not sure if meeting his family was the right thing to be doing right about now. “Do you want to go?”
“You want me to meet your parents and everything?” She replied unsure. She would love it, but it was hard to imagine them liking her.
“Of course, Beesley. Why wouldn’t I want you to come?.” He said with a dignified chuckle. She couldn’t help but break either. “I’ll drive.”
“Can I pick the music?” She said, slowly letting the idea wear her down. She really did want to spend the long weekend with him.
“Obviously.” He said breathlessly. She remembered the time they both did their Stanley impression, and she jinxed him. She had to go all the way over to Vance Refrigeration to get that coke, but it was worth the walk just to hear him say hi in that winded tone of voice.
“I’d really like to meet them.” She smiled as she said those words, realizing she was going to be meeting his family. That was a major step in their relationship.
“Okay. I’ll see you Friday then?” He asked, and she retorted with a solid yes.
She packed her bags at least six times, making sure every outfit was just perfect. Then she unfolded everything, feeling stupid for being so self-conscious. But she wanted to make a good impression. These were Jim’s relatives she was meeting. She didn’t want to feel like they were looking down on her in any way.
She put the bags in the trunk of her car, knowing full well that she was going to rush out of the office as soon as she could. The thought of seeing Jim made her giddy with anticipation, and the clock didn’t seem to move fast enough. Every time Michael burst in with an announcement, she sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. Looking down at her watch, she began counting down the hours until she would be back with Jim.
About an hour after she came to work, Pam decided she wasn’t a very patient woman. Getting out of work would not prove to be so difficult as she once believed. She put on her best sick face, and drudged into Michael’s office.
“Pam, what’s wrong? You look like you’ve been bit... by the love bug!” He exclaimed, still under the delusion that he had a chance with her. He didn’t really.
“I’m not feeling too good.” Pam moaned, faking illness.
“Well, take a minute, lie down. I can’t let you go home, I mean, those phones aren’t going to answer themselves.” He answered with a fake chuckle. Like an awkward one. He never did that kind of thing before. Pam was getting frustrated. This was going to require plan B.
“I’m having women troubles.” She said adamantly, and Michael instantly froze. Even mentioning those words combined was enough to make him infinitely uncomfortable.
“Those phones have voice mail.” He said, shifting nervous like a little boy in health class. Pam tried her hardest not to smile, but she nodded and walked out of his office. “Feel better, Pam.” He called out as she grabbed her purse from the counter.
“What’s wrong with her?” Dwight asked Michael as Pam made her to the door.
“Poor thing, she’s lovesick.” Michael sighed, then looked up at Dwight. “It would never work between her and me, though.” He shook his head, and walked back into the office.
“Did he just say it would never work between us?” She whispered to herself as she walked into the elevator. All she could do was sigh, and hope this weekend was going to erase all the bad memories Scranton had caused her.
***
“Women troubles? Did that seriously work?” Jim was barely able to speak as he asked this question. They had been in the car for twenty minutes, and between awkward silences, they began telling stories. “Wow, I can honestly say I did not expect that move from you.”
“I tried faking the plague, but that didn’t work. When in doubt, flaunt your assets.” Pam said with a giggle. She had never felt so free in her life. It used to be where road trips were big deals. It would require weeks of planning and packing, and the whole time she would be angry over some little detail. But everything was so spontaneous yet perfectly planned. She looked over at Jim, who was out of his normal suit and tie, now in a t-shirt. His hair tousled around from the wind funneling through his open window. He looked so amazing, Pam found it hard not to stare at him.
“This is going to be a good weekend.” She said, turning her attention back to the road. Miles of highway stretched out before the car. They still had a long time to go, but she was definitely going to enjoy the ride.
***
“Are you ready?” He said as the car sat immobile in the driveway. The closer to the house they got, the more nerves began to take hold of them. She was meeting his parents. His entire family. This wasn’t something light and fluffy as they once thought. Pam looked over at him with a reassuring smile.
“I think so.” She flattened out the wrinkles in her light blue miniskirt and took in one last breath. This was a step in the right direction. They both walked around to the trunk, and pulled out their luggage.
“I can get it.” Jim exclaimed as the two of them simultaneously went for her duffle bag. She looked at him, trying to decide if he really wanted to get it or was doing it out of duty or obligation. She pushed a stray lock of curls behind her ear, and gave up. Maybe he did want to do little things like that for her.
The farmhouse where Jim’s uncle lived was anything but quaint. Two stories stood before her. The white paint on the walls was slowly cracking off. Three acres of farmland surrounded her, and she felt this was not the time to mention she had never really been on a farm before.
A tall, slender woman came running to them as Jim and Pam stood at the tip of the driveway. Pam instantly recognized her from pictures on Jim’s desk. His old desk, anyway. She wrapped her arms around Jim, causing him to drop their bags.
“You’re here!” She exclaimed, engulfing her son in her embrace. Once their 30-second hug was done, she stepped towards Pam. “You must be Pam.” Pam nodded as his mom announced. She couldn’t help but feel stupid for smiling so much. It was just that she looked so happy to see her.
“Hello Mrs. Halpert.” Pam let out, shocked to be received so warmly by Jim’s mom. They had never met before, and here she was, locked in such a warm hug. Maybe that’s where Jim got it from.
“Oh, don’t be silly. Call me Larissa.” She replied once the embrace was broken. “Why don’t you take the bags in the house, everybody’s out back.” She gave explicit directions on what to do. It was such a nice afternoon, sitting in the house seemed like a ridiculous idea. Jim picked up the bags, and made his way into the house. Pam dutifully followed him.
“Your mom seems nice.” Pam said with a smile as they walked into the living room. It had a warm and welcoming vibe to it. She could see herself growing comfortable here.
“I think she likes you.” Jim admitted as he threw his suitcase at the edge of a staircase. He gently placed her bags next to his, and grabbed her by the small of her back. He gave her a light kiss, and smiled at her. “But then again, what’s not to like?”
“You’re sweet.” Pam squeaked as their hold still lingered. After nearly a second, he took her through the kitchen and out the back door. As she pushed her way through the screen door, he grabbed her hand in a comforting way. It certainly felt good. A large number of adults were sitting in lawn chairs, sipping on glasses of lemonade and bottles of beer. As Jim made his way towards the crowd, they all turned their attention to the two. Their grip on each other tightened.
“Jimmy!” A few of the men exclaimed, full of excitement. They raised their drinks at his arrival, and he acknowledged their welcomes with a nod.
“Jeez, aren’t you going to introduce us to your girlfriend?” Someone who looked almost exactly like Jim, except a couple years older, joked loudly after a few minutes of greetings. Pam looked down, embarrassed for some reason. She knew she really didn’t have any reason to be, but she couldn’t help but feel humiliated.
“Everybody, this is Pam.” Jim practically yelled at the top of his lungs. All the adults waved, and murmered different hellos towards her. They found two vacant chairs next to what Pam presumed was Jim’s older brother.
“We know all about you, Pam.” Jim’s brother poked, a sheepish grin on his face. “Or, at least it feels like it since he’s talked about you so much.”
“Well, there all lies, I’m sure.” Pam jested, and the circle of people burst into laughter.
“The girl’s got spunk!” Jim’s grandfather exclaimed, slapping his knee with giddiness.
“Pam, this is my brother Joey.” Jim finally began proper introductions. Pam offered Joey her hand, shaking it vigorously. “And that is his wife Sarah.” Pam gave the trim blonde sitting next to Joey a handshake as well. Handshakes, Beesley? This is Jim’s family, not a job interview. “My uncle Dave, with whom we will be staying.” He continued, pointing towards the fifty-something man on her right. She went against her instincts, and gave him a handshake as well.
“It’s a pleasure.” He said sweetly, and she immediately knew that the sweetness Jim possessed ran in the family.
“It’s really good to meet all of you.” Pam said sweetly, once again tucking the hair behind her ears. It was a nice, warm day outside, and the afternoon was just getting started. Jim managed to get them some beer, and she was definitely looking forward to the weekend.
***
After dinner and dishes, Pam found herself sitting on the front porch just thinking. It was so quiet out here. The children had finally quieted down in front of the TV. The adults were gathered around the table, playing a game of cards. She could still hear them chattering, but on the whole, it was very quiet. The quiet was a good place to think.
The first few weeks after she left Roy were hard. Every time she thought about it, she wondered if she had made the right choice. It hurt so much being alone, knowing she was supposed to be getting married soon. She had to convince herself that first week she was making the right choice. She didn’t deserve to be in a relationship with somebody who would hurt her like that.
But now? There was no more doubt if she had made the right choice. There were moments in her life she wouldn’t trade for anything. In a way, that had saved her. Catching Roy, leaving him. It saved her from that life she didn’t want. And now she was happy. For once.
The ringing of her cell phone interrupted the card game. Everybody clamored, trying to figure where it was coming from.
“Where is she?” Jim asked, going for her purse. They all simply shrugged, and he pulled out her phone. It was probably important, so he just answered it for her. “Hello?”
“Pam?” A voice slurred on the other end. It didn’t take long for Jim to realize who was on the other end. And clearly not only was he drunk, but calling his girlfriend’s cell phone. “Pam are you there? Baby, I miss you so much.” Jim stammered as Roy was on the other end, crying in his drunken haze. It was like that night on booze cruise, or maybe even worse. “I know I hurt you, but I need you so much!” Anger rose in Jim’s throat as he fought to not hurt someone, namely Roy Anderson. “Just let me know I have a chance.”
“You don’t, Roy.” Jim snapped, surprised the words were coming out of his mouth. “She doesn’t love you anymore.” And before Roy could have a rebuttle, Jim slammed the phone shut with one loud crack. The room suddenly fell silent, and stared at him.
“What’s going on?” Pam asked as she walked back in from the porch. Nearly everybody turned from him to her, waiting for a reaction.
“Can we talk outside?” Jim asked, trying to contain the anger in his voice. Pam was still confused about what was going on, but followed him nonetheless.
“Why is Roy still calling you?” Jim burst out as they were standing in the front lawn of the farm. Pam stopped moving, just looking at him for an answer. “Your cell phone was ringing, and I answered. He was calling you.”
“What???” Pam exclaimed, noting the change in pitch in her voice.
“Has he done it before?” Jim asked, feeling the jealousy filling in his throat. “I mean, I think I should know if your ex-fiancée has been drunk dialing you every once and a while.”
“Why are you getting mad at me?” Pam shrieked, watching Jim’s disposition change drastically. He had been so happy mere seconds ago, and now he was blowing up at her. “I didn’t do anything.”
“Exactly.” Jim spat out, still amazed at all this rage going on beneath his skin. “I just don’t think you’ve given him clear enough signals that what you guys had was over.”
“Oh my God.” Pam scoffed, burying her head in her hands. “It is impossible to talk to you right now.” It was this that made him realize what was happening. He stepped towards her, trying to console her. She broke away from his gestures. “Obviously you have some issues you need to work out if you’re going to be doing this.”
He wanted to follow her as she stormed back into the house. She stomped up the stairs, and he wanted to just stop her and kiss her. Make her forget all about this stupid argument. But he couldn’t do that. Not just yet. So he let her walk inside, and fall asleep early in another room. Their vacation was off to a great start.
Resolutions by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
After the big fight...
Sept. 2, 2006
He let the digital alarm clock fill the room with a red glow. He hoped that the clock was lying, that he hadn’t been lying here without sleep for five hours now. It was only three o’clock in the morning. That call from Roy, that fight with Pam, it was all laying heavily on his mind. It was causing him not to sleep. He walked down the stairs into the kitchen, for something to calm his nerves.
“Hey little brother.” Joey called from the kitchen table, still in his pajamas too. Jim nodded at him, and took a seat down next to him. “Couldn’t sleep either?”
“Nope.” Jim sighed, reaching for a water bottle on the counter. The ripped it open and took a swig.
“For years, all you ever did was talk about this girl. Now you have her, and you get into a stupid little fight with her.” Joey broke in, totally catching Jim off guard. “I’m sorry, but you’re my brother. I don’t want to see you totally screw up everything you’ve got.”
“Thanks.” Jim said sarcastically, and then rolled his eyes. “It’s just...” Jim began, trying to find the words. “Sometimes it feels like she didn’t pick me, I was just her second choice.”
“Come on.” Joey sighed, turning towards his brother in a very serious matter. “She came back that night, didn’t she? If you were second choice, she probably would’ve beat around the bush a while, and then realized it. She came back that night.”
“Because her fiancée was cheating on her.” Jim broke in, adamant on making himself miserable. “The same fiancée that called her.”
“Is this what you two are fighting about? Jim, stop being such a girl about this. Just talk to her.” Joey said, and there was a light pressure on the staircase. They both looked, and found Pam at the bottom of the stairs. Both Jim and Joey looked about the room awkwardly, then towards her.
“Hey.” She moaned softly, taking a seat across from Jim.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Joey asked, noting the growing tension between Jim and Pam. She nodded, and then returned to the staring contest between her and Jim. “Well, I’m gonna hit the hay. See you two tomorrow.” They both moaned goodbyes.
“I’m sorry.” They both broke in with simultaneously. Embarrassed, they both looked down and gave a chuckle. “I shouldn’t have blown up like I did. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have.” She said, confident and aggressive. “I can’t control what he does.” She paused, biting her lip. “It’s just...” She began, then stopped for a minute. “I really want things to be different with us. Promise you won’t blow up at me like that again.”
“Promise.” Jim said, sticking up three fingers in the boy scout honor. “Scout’s honor.”
“You were a scout?” Pam giggled, thinking of Jim in the boy scouts. He nodded, as if offended she would ask a question like that.
“Why, don’t I look like a boy scout?” Jim asked, and reached his hands across the table. He grabbed her hand, making their connection a little stronger. “I promise, I’m not going to ever do that again.”
“Good.” Pam said contently with a smile on her face. “Because if you do, then everybody in the office will know that you were a boy scout.”
“How am I ever going to deal with you, Beesley?” Jim asked with a smile. Things were getting back to normal again. He loved her more than anything. There was nothing that crazy bosses, drunk ex-fiancées, or anybody in the world could do about it.
***
“Burger or brat?” He dangled the plate of meat in front of her face. He swung to the spot next to her on the picnic table. The plastic plate down before her, she picked the brat up and put it on her own plate next to a pile of fresh watermelon. He leaned in towards her, resting his hand on her thigh as he struggled to grab the ketchup bottle.
“Can I help you?” Pam asked while laughing. Jim just shook his head, and looked victorious as held the bottle. “You could’ve asked.” She admitted, putting a bite of fruit in her mouth.
“Then I wouldn’t have an excuse to be close to you.” He whispered, close enough where she felt his warm breath tickling her ears.
“Like I said, you could’ve asked.” She gave him one large grin and went on to take the bite out of her brat. She inched her way towards him, and soon their hips were rubbing up against each other. The friction between them was noticeable. “So how often does the going-for-the-ketchup routine work when you’re trying to cop a feel?” She asked, changing topics.
“It depends on the girl.” He shrugged, spraying red sauce all over his hamburger. He took a large bite, playfully eyeing her inch by inch. “And how easy they are.”
“I am not easy!” She gasped, teasingly slapping him across the shoulder.
“I’m sure you’re not, Beesley.”
“Just shut up and eat your burger.”
“Whatever you say, boss. Whatever you say.”
***
The party began to wind down after dark. A bonfire was kindled in the backyard, and Pam had found the most comfortable spot: cradled on the ground, entwined in Jim’s arms. She rested her head against his chest, moving along with every breath. He moved his arm across her back, and made a mental note to buy her more of those cotton shirts she wore. They were soft, and he loved the way they felt on her.
“Those were some amazing fireworks.” Pam finally sighed, recalling the display Jim’s uncle had put on for them an hour ago, and breathing in the smell of the fire and Jim’s cologne. She looked at him deeply and noticed his eyes were sparkling as she spoke. He had noticed the same thing about her. “Not nearly as amazing as Dwight’s…” Her voice trailed off as she buried herself in those warm memories.
“I believe you’re thinking of my grilled cheese.” Jim corrected her, and the recollection was so vivid, he could almost taste the sandwiches. He ran his head along her soft curly hair; it smelled like apple shampoo. Having her there, in his arms was just astounding. The way she fit in so perfectly, not only in his arms, but in his life. It was just one of the millions of reasons he loved her. Finally caving in to his feelings, he kissed her softly on the forehead. She sighed with bliss feeling his lips on her skin. She tightened her grip on him, taking in another moment.
“You’re not my second choice.” She shook her head, randomly bringing it up. He pulled away from her for a second, just close enough where they were still touching, but far enough where he could see her. “I heard you talking to Joey this morning, and I wanted to tell it to you that I didn’t pick you because Roy was cheating on me. I picked you because I wanted you.”
“Pam...” Jim sighed, shifting awkwardly, trying not to think about this. Not now. This was a happy moment. He looked at her, reading her eyes like he always does. Trying to get a feeling for her emotions. And all he found was confidence. The confidence in her eyes was strong, and blazing. And it was slowly melting away all the doubts he had. He pushed some of the hair out of her eyes, and just couldn’t help but stare at her. She was just too good for reality. Was this really happening?
“I love you.” She said breathlessly, stunning Jim. He had thought those words thousands of times, and he imagined her saying those words. But he had never heard her say them before. “I love you so much, sometimes it hurts. Being away from you, is just torture.” She drew closer to him, inhaling his essence. It was surprising how easy those words were to say, especially to him. They had been friends for so long, and she was afraid the transition would be bulky and noticeable. But it wasn’t. “I love you.” She whispered one last time before she rested her head beneath his chin.
“Kiss her!” Joey broke the sudden silence between the Halperts. Pam sat up, looking at everybody now watching her and Jim’s intimate moment. They both looked at him, motioning for them to finally kiss. Then they looked at each other, and did not hesitate in pleasing the crowd. He rested his hand along the back of her neck as their lips collided. Cheering and applause came from the others, but it didn’t really matter. Jim and Pam just took part in their fever. She pulled away, trailing her lips gently across his cheek.
“I’m ready.” She whispered, playing with the collar of his shirt. Her voice played him like a guitar chord, and there wasn’t any subtext that needed to be decoded between them. Those two little words were enough to cement what they had known all along: they were meant to be together.
The fire blazed on as Pam led him back in the house, and up to the bedroom. Nobody seemed to notice as she held his hand tighter than ever before. Nobody seemed to care that they both conveniently decided to go to bed at the same time. And nobody even remembered what they had been fighting about the night before.
***
He wakes up in the middle of the night, entwined in bed sheets and her arms. It’s a sweet, comforting feeling knowing that he isn’t going to wake up and she’s gone. He just wants to lie there forever, watching her sleep so peacefully. Watching her chest rise and fall with breaths, the way her eyelids look when they’re tight shut with her lips curled in a slight smile. I could get used to this.
She begins to stir after a few minutes and Jim is mesmerized as she awakens. He just strokes her bare arm, creating more electricity between them. She smiles as she opens her eyes, and he’s there.
“Hi.”
“Hi.” Jim sighs back. He pulls her closer, never wanting to be away from her again.
“That was really...nice.”
He laughs. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard it described in quite that fashion before.”
“None of your old girlfriends have ever told you that you were nice in bed?” She chuckles too, shifting around in the blankets.
Jim shrugged, then kissed her on the forehead. “It’s never really mattered until now”
She grabs his hand and holds it close to her heart. As she rested her cheek back on the pillow, she just looked at him. “I don’t want to go home. I don’t want this...to end.”
“It won’t.” He sighed, stroking her hair and gazing deeply at her. They whispered I love you to each other, and fell asleep in each other’s arms knowing that things were never going to change.
The Merger by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
Wow, I’m very sorry, but I suffer from SADD—Story Attention Deficit Disorder. I’ve been very neglecting of this, so I’m going to wrap it up in four or five chapters. (I’m thinking going to 14.)
November 13, 2006
When Michael told her Sunday night that she was going to need to come in extra early on Monday, she weighed the pros and cons, and ultimately decided that losing an hour of sleep was definitely worth waiting to see Jim back at the office again. Jim, back in Scranton, to stay, was just too tantalizing for her to handle. She grew impatient for his return from the second she found out the two branches would be merging. So helping Michael prepare for the big merger was a welcomed distraction.
She went to the store, buying different "breakfast-y" foods (as Michael had explained to her before she left). Since it was on the corporate card, she caved and bought a few bottles of champagne, which she knew Jim would have fun making jokes about. She could hear him saying, "Champagne and donuts—Scranton sure has changed since I was here."
The entire time in the checkout, she imagined what words would be said when she finally had him in her arms again.
Once the conference room was all set up, all the people from Scranton began coming in. Pam sat down at her desk, and now there was nothing she could do but wait. On habit, she looked over at Jim’s old desk, now empty. It had taken twenty bucks before Ryan agreed to take the desk across from Dwight. It was definitely worth it, though.
One thought that occupied her mind was how to tell everybody. She had been so wrapped up in her fancy new life; new apartment, new boyfriend, new everything, that she hadn’t bothered to tell everyone about her new relationship. (It was kind of exciting, keeping such a secret from everyone.) Every time she convinced herself that telling someone in the office that she and Jim were together, somehow she was convinced that the scrutiny of a long-distance relationship was bad enough; the nuisance of her coworkers analyzing it was even worse.
After fifteen minutes of wondering, she decided to disclose the relationship to HR (Toby had said during the sexual harassment seminar to disclose office romances; it hadn’t seem relevant when Jim was in Stamford.), and she would let the information "slip" to Kelly at lunch. Then the entire office would know by the end of the day.
The one person that hadn’t crossed her mind was Roy. They were over, one hundred percent, and Pam felt that her relationship with Jim was no business of Roy’s.
The new people began filing in, and Pam started getting nervous.
The first fresh face was Hannah. Pam listened excitedly as Hannah talked about her brand new baby, and almost warned her against bringing him in to the office one day. Michael plus baby is never a good sign. His favorite thing to do around people younger than two was do his "Look Who’s Talking" routine. Hannah found her desk, and Pam returned to the phones until the next person came in.
Martin seemed dignified, and cheerfully chatted with Pam about the weather. Once Michael had made the situation tense, Martin went over to his desk, and she stared at the door. He wasn’t the kind of guy to show up late. When a body began to press through, her pulse began to race.
Andy walked through the door, and her hopes slowly deflated. She rejected his advances, mostly because she had heard plenty of stories about him from her boyfriend. She loved substituting Jim’s name with the word boyfriend. It filled her stomach with butterflies.
She went through the elation and deflation for Jim’s arrival three more times. Getting sick of the mood swings, she decided to get some work done. There were voice mails to ignore, so she gathered up old documents and plugged in the shredder.
It was during the sixth letter that she feels a presence towering over her.
Someone tall, lanky, and undeniably gorgeous.
"I move away for five months, and Pam Beesley learns to do work. What has Michael done to this place?" He jokes, and the mere sound of her voice nearly makes her go limp. She flips the switch to the shredder, and runs over to him as it stops with a hault. She can’t even speak as she wraps her arms around him. "So you are glad to see me."
"You have no idea." She says, finally letting go of the embrace. She has to convince herself that nobody knows (yet). "Welcome back."
"It’s good to be back. The view at Stamford... well, it wasn’t that great."
"It wasn’t that great here, either." She pauses, licks her lips, and sighs with relief. "I think it just got a little better."
"I’m glad to hear that. Now where is this welcoming party?"
"Conference room." She says. He motions for her to follow him as he lays his belongings back on his desk. Once the coat and bag are down, he trails Pam as she walks into the conference room.
"It’s good to be back."
***
By the end of Michael’s orientation video, she’s regretted not asking him to move in with her. Yes, her apartment was small. But she loved the idea of waking up in the same place as him; sharing the same rooms as him, hanging her clothes in the same closet as him.
Instead, she told him that living in his old house with Mark was the best thing for them. He didn’t seem to mind, and she knew that eventually it would happen. They were slow at getting to things, but once they started, good things didn’t stop.
***
She tried to talk to him during lunch; she even brings a bag of jellybeans to split with him. But he is surrounded by Kevin, Kelly and Ryan, and there isn’t room at the table. She sits by the new girl, Karen, instead.
"So, you know Jim, right?" Karen asked after they had gone halfway through their food. Pam nods, still keeping their relationship a secret. It’s nice to have him just to herself. "Has he... I sound like I’m in seventh grade or something. But does he talk about me at all? I mean, you guys were hanging out in the conference room, you just seem like close friends."
Her stomach ties itself into knots as Karen looks interested in Jim. Her Jim.
"Why, are you...interested in him?"
Karen looks over at him, smiling in her direction. She doesn’t realize he’s looking at Pam. "Kind of. Do you know if he has a girlfriend?" Pam doesn’t know how to reply to that. She barely knows this girl, and even though she seems nice enough, she really doesn’t feel like telling her about her love life. So she stammers on her words until she comes up with a logical response.
"Maybe you should just talk to him." She said, standing up. Pam throws away the rest of her food; she really didn’t feel like eating it anyway.
***
He looks down at his watch around 3:00, and stands up from his desk. He puts on his coat, and goes for the door. He doesn’t give any kind of an explanation to her, he just leaves.
And Karen leaves with him.
She’s spent the better part of the summer convincing herself that nothing was happening. That Jim was not that kind of guy who would do something like that, but this was just too overwhelming. Jealousy ripples through her, and she wants to rip every single hair out of Karen’s perfectly shaped head.
"I think that new girl has a thing for Jim." Kevin says, nodding his head in agreement with himself. He licks his lips, and turns to Pam. He loves riling her up with things like this. "She’s so hot."
"Shut up, Kevin." Pam says, in an uncharacteristic moment. She has never said shut up to anybody in the office. But she didn’t need his berating words when she was silently going insane. Kevin took the advice, and went back to his desk. No one tried to bother Pam for the rest of the day.
***
By five, Pam was ready to assault Jim with questions. Her paranoia was, to herself, well founded. She wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, but they had been in another state for months. Karen was an attractive female, and they had worked together for months. In another state. Who knows what could’ve happened when she wasn’t looking?
Stop, she told herself. Jim wasn’t like that. He wouldn’t cheat on you; he loves you. And you love him.
But Karen is interested him. She told Pam that at lunch.
When Jim comes strolling into the office, giggling with Karen, Pam stands up and fills herself with a false sense of aggression.
"We need to talk."
***
"Answer the question, Jim. Is she pretty?"
This was not going well. From the time she confronted him in the office, until they had reached his car, she had remained eerily silent. Then the second he turned the key in the ignition, she got all weird, asking him questions like if Karen was pretty.
The answer was no.
"No, Pam! You’re being crazy."
"Am I being crazy? Let’s check the history. I had been cheated on by my fiancé. I called you during a fight, and you were out with another girl. We were apart for five months, and you spent your days working with a prettier, skinnier woman." He kept on driving, despite looking at Pam every once and a while. "She told me she was interested in you, Jim. If I’m acting crazy, it’s only because I’m so in love with you, I don’t want to lose you." She stopped for a minute, then the car turned into some driveway. She looked at the house, not recognizing it. It wasn’t Mark’s house, and it wasn’t her apartment. "So if something is going on... What is this?"
"Is it my turn?" He asks, slightly joking. She starts breathing heavily, and he turns towards her. "I would never cheat on you. Not in one million years. Three trillion, maybe." He sees one crack in her anger, and decides to continue with it. "And while I recognize that your fear is well-founded, I swear on my life and all that is holy that I would never do anything to hurt you. And I am going to do whatever I can to prove to you that you’re it for me."
"You still haven’t answered my question. Where are we?"
"This is where I live."
"I thought you were living in your old place."
"Mark’s getting married. I would hate to share a wall with them." He chuckles, and she chuckles too. Things are getting more normal. He finally feels safe enough hold her hand again. Surprisingly, she doesn’t stop him.
"Karen did want to talk to me, and I told her everything. I told her how madly in love I was with you, and she understood completely. Then she locked herself in her car, crying for hours, because she knew that she could never have this." He motioned towards himself, and she breaks out into a full-on laugh. "Because I’m all yours."
"Are you sure it was hours? It might have been, like, fifteen minutes." She finally is comfortable to joke about this now. She kisses him lightly on the lips, and he returns it with a full-on make out session. "So are you going to invite me in to your new place, or do we have to stay in your car for another hour and a half?"
He opens the door for her, and pulls out his house key. Taking off his coat, then taking hers, she can’t help but notice by the door. There is a mat, with a few of his old sneakers, and a post it. She lifts it up, and it reads "Pam’s Shoes". She pockets the note, but doesn’t tell him about it.
When he leads her into the living room, she looks around. A couch, a bookshelf, a TV. Along his collection of DVD’s, she finds another post-it on a bare section of the shelf. It reads "Pam’s DVDs". Once again, she doesn’t raise questions.
As he gives her the tour, she finds even more of these notes. Once they are in the bedroom, she can’t keep guessing anymore.
"Jim, could you please tell me what is up with these?" She asks, holding all of the notes in her hand. Jim looks at them, then at her, and he smiles.
"Well, when I was settling in over the weekend..."
"You were in Scranton this weekend? And I did nothing but sit around in sweats..."
"I’m sorry, Beesley, but did you want me to finish the story?" He interrupts, and she blushes. He loves watching her blush like that. "I kept the spots open where your stuff would eventually go. If you decided to move in with me sometime."
She plays with the post its for a moment, finding two more (Pam’s drawers, and Pam’s book shelf), and smiles at him. His blood pressure starts to rise again. "You know, I would hate for all these spaces in this beautiful home to go to waste..." Is she saying what he thinks she’s saying? "How soon can I move in?"
He doesn’t dignify that question with a response. He just takes her in his arms, and feels their lips as they come together like they had done many times before. The two of them float together as they run their hands down each others necks, in each others hair, along the sides of each others cheeks.
"I love you." She says, finally taking two seconds to breathe. "I’m sorry I ever doubted you."
"I love you, too." He says, with a smile tattooed on his face. He isn’t quite sure, but he’s almost positive he will never erase that smile ever again. "So, are you thinking what I’m thinking?"
"Movie and microwave popcorn?" She finishes his sentence, and he nods. They race down the stairs, into his nicely furnished living room. He calls out to the adjacent kitchen which movies he has unpacked, and she wraps her head around the idea of being in Jim’s kitchen. And her kitchen. All at the same time.
She brings the bowl of steaming popcorn into the living room, finding him on the couch with the remote. He had put in a DVD she had lent him—one she definitely loved.
"I still can’t believe you haven’t watched this yet." She said, holding the DVD case in her hand. "Moulin Rouge is one of the classic romantic films of all time."
"Classic? Didn’t it just come out a couple years ago?"
"Just shut up and watch the movie." She jokes, shoveling a handful of buttery popcorn into her mouth. "Welcome home." She kisses him on the cheek, and he jokingly shushes her so they can watch the movie.
End Notes:
You know what to do.
No Suprise Please by WildBerryJam
Author's Notes:
Well, without my gals EmilyHalpert and BeckySue, I'd..... not be good :) Superbeta's at their finest here folks, seriously.
May 11, 2007
How was he supposed to work on a day like this? One year. They had been together for exactly one year today. It had been the greatest 364 days he had ever had. And tonight he had the greatest date ever planned. Fancy Italian restaurant, champagne, and then...
He was snapped out of his thoughts when Jan strode into the office.
They wouldn’t normally expect Jan on a Wednesday afternoon, but the way things had unfolded in the past week, anything was fair game. Michael was settling into a New York apartment, and Corporate had denied his request to name his own successor.
Ergo, the regional manager’s slot had yet to be filled.
The phones were on automatic voicemail for the rest of the day, because Pam had taken a personal day to run some errands and finish up her final art project.
To Jim, the office had never felt emptier.
“Afternoon Jim, can we speak in private for a minute?” Jan said abruptly, ushering Jim towards the conference room. He followed dutifully.
He looked back at the empty reception desk one last time, and imagined Pam was there smiling at him.
He suddenly didn’t feel as nervous.
***
Jan sat across from Jim at the table, looking calm and collected. “As you know, Michael has been transferred to the corporate office in New York.” Jan began, very professionally. “And as you’re aware of, we’ve decided that Michael will not, in his own words, ‘name his successor’.” She shuddered at the thought of Michael speaking.
“Yeah, why is that?” Jim asked curiously, and Jan sighed with exasperation. She leaned in towards him, and began to whisper.
“He wanted to put Dwight in charge, and we don’t feel that Dwight would fit well with management.”
Jim winced as Jan mentioned Dwight’s name. Then, with a chuckle, he said, “Well, let me say that you made the right call.”
Jan smiled with content. “Well, good. I’m glad you agree. Because I’ve had a discussion with the CFO and the board, and we have decided that we would like to offer you the regional manager position.”
His automatic response was to turn them down. His philosophy on careers was radically clear. After taking this job, throwing himself on a train would be the next step. He didn’t want to end up like Michael: having his whole life being a paper company.
Jim looked unsure. “If you don’t mind me asking, why did you choose me?”
“Because Jim, you’re clearly a bright guy. You have great numbers, everybody likes you. We think you would make a great manager.”
He stammered. “Well, Jan...”
She interjected quite rapidly. “Before you say no, Jim, let me outline some of the benefits.” Jim sat silently, and allowed Jan to continue on her clearly rehearsed speech. “It’s a noticeable pay increase, the health care benefits are a step up. You have more control over your hours, and you have guaranteed job security for as long as the branch stays open, which according to your numbers, could be a very long time. You would have a lot more... security.”
Out of instinct, he turned to face the reception desk. Once again Pam was on his mind and how this could affect their relationship.
It would certainly help tonight’s events be less of a strain on the wallet.
“I think I’ll do it.” Jim said, a smile on his face.
Jan leaned in closer towards him, and examined his behavior. “This is a huge commitment, Jim. You remember the way that Josh jerked us around when the branches merged, and to be honest, we can’t afford the same thing to happen here. If you can’t see yourself here in five or ten years, please just let me know so we can find an appropriate candidate.”
Jan paused, waiting for Jim to reply.
A pay raise. Better benefits. Give Pam the opportunity to work on her art. A big wedding. Supporting a family.
He nodded vehemently, and shook Jan’s hand. “Yeah. I can do it.”
Pam still lingered on his mind all day. Everything was falling into place. The dinner, the bombshell of his new job, and the most important question he was ever going to ask her.
He had some shopping to do during his lunch break.
***
Pam set her fork down on the table, and looked over at her art teacher, Noah. “Thanks again for dinner. My boyfriend and I usually order in, so it’s nice to take in the whole restaurant experience.”
He laughed and leaned in closer. “Don’t worry about it. Now, I just wanted to talk to you about this job thing.” Pam sat silently as he spoke. “It’s a graphic design institute. You’d be mostly hired by advertising companies, but other agencies will contact us from time to time. It’s the same basic setup we used in class, only this time you’re getting paid to do it instead of paying us to do it.”
That’s what she said. She thought, stifling a giggle. “It sounds absolutely great. I’ve been looking to get out of reception work for a long time.” Pam replied, her spirits lifting with every word he spoke about the job.
“You’ve got a lot of talent, Pam. And I think if you’re just willing to make the move, that you’ll go a long way at my company. So... what do you say?”
Pam paused for a second, thinking about all that had happened in a year: she had left Roy and that tumultuous relationship, she was in love with Jim, she was dedicating herself to art and a new career. This job meant that she could finally do something for herself.
She said with a smile, “I would love to join your company.”
***
Around two, she finally stopped shaking enough to pick up her cell phone. He was never going to believe this. But on the third ring, she had no idea how she was going to tell him. This was huge—this was going to change her life. Their lives.
On the fourth ring, she nearly hung up.
“Jim Halpert.” He said nonchalantly, and she could tell he wasn’t in the office anymore. Jim didn’t answer his cell in the office. Dwight made his point of “no personal calls on company time” very clear.
“Hey.” She said breathlessly. “It’s me.”
“Hey you.” He said, genuinely thrilled to hear her voice. “How was...”
“Good.” She interrupted, just anxious and excited, and not thinking clearly.
“So what’s up?” He asked, unsure of why she’d call at 2:00 on her day off.
The words choked up in her throat. She had been rehearsing for nearly two hours how to tell him, and now all the words just escaped her. Telling him now just doesn’t feel right. “So what are the plans for tonight?” She managed to get out, wringing her hands with nerves.
“Well, Beesley, I’ve never been one for ruining a surprise...” He began, then trailed off.
“Fine.” She let out an exasperated sigh. “So has Dwight invaded the regional manager’s position yet? Is it safe for me to come back to the office?”
He laughed, trying to calm his nerves. He just couldn’t tell her that he was going to occupy Michael’s old office. That was a surprise he wanted to save for dinner. “Don’t worry, Dunder Mifflin is safe from a Dwight Schrute power trip.”
She sighed with relief. “Good. Okay, well, I better get back to my project.”
“Come on Beesley, are you seriously not done yet? You’re such a procrastinator!” He joked, and she chuckled lightly.
“You know me. Alright. Love you.”
“Love you too.” He said, hanging up. He finally had the courage to approach the jeweler. “Hi.” He said, reaching into his pocket. “I bought this ring a week ago, and I’d like to exchange it. Upgrade a little.” He said with a grin. The jeweler promptly ushered him towards the sections of engagement rings.
This was definitely a great day.
***
The car ride to the restaurant was generally silent. They both murmured words about their respective days and how good the other one looked, but both were battling nerves on how to come out with their secrets.
Jim rehearsed his proposal speech; Pam rehearsed her new job speech.
He opened the door to the fancy Italian restaurant, and she walked in before him. “So have I told you how beautiful you look yet?” He said, trying to break the uncomfortable and awkward silence. She did look absolutely beautiful. She was wearing the tight brown dress she had worn to Phyllis’ wedding, and once again decided to wear her down in more refined curls.
She blushed. “Yeah, you did.”
“Oh. In that case...” He paused, and gazed deeply into her eyes. “You look so beautiful.” Reluctantly, he turned his attention towards the hostess. “Hi. Halpert, reservation for two.”
***
She was floored at the fact that Scranton had such a nice Italian restaurant. But it really didn’t matter where they ate, because she was sitting across from the man she loved immensely. But when the waiter came out carrying a bottle of nice champagne, Pam nearly fell out of her chair.
“Let me just say one thing real quick.” Jim said as the flutes were filled with champagne. Pam gave him her undivided attention. “I just want to let you know that this past year has been one of the best, and that being with you has made me happier than I ever thought I could be.”
She felt the tears welling up in her eyes. Without even saying a word, she gave him a gentle kiss. He held her hand on the table, and decided which shocking announcement would come first.
The proposal.
But before two words could come out of his lips, she interrupted casually. “I know this is an awkward question, but Jim, why are we drinking champagne?” She said, flabbergasted at his spending. “It’s probably really expensive.”
Plan B. The job comes first.
“Don’t be ridiculous Pam. It is definitely most expensive.” He retorted, not even looking up from his menu. “And as for reasons. Let’s see.” He set his menu down on the table, and began counting off the reasons with his fingers. “Because it’s our anniversary. Because I love you...” He stopped once more, and picked up the menu. Refusing to make eye contact, he continued. “And because I was offered the regional manager’s position.”
It took a few seconds for the sentence to kick in, but when it did, she could barely contain her enthusiasm. “Oh my gosh, Jim. That’s amazing!” She said, brushing her hand along his cheek.
He was off in a ramble about the pay increase when another sentence kicked in.
The excitement drained from her face, and soon Pam was as white as a ghost.
“Whoa, hold on Beesley. Are you okay?” He said, noticing her ashen appearance.
She shrugged it off like it was nothing. “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about.” She was trying to change the topic. The look on his face when he told her about the promotion was enough to keep her content for a lifetime. This was his moment, and she didn’t want to ruin it.
“No, seriously. Is something wrong?” He asked, not wanting to drop the conversation. She shook her head, but not convincingly enough. “I mean it. If something’s wrong, please just tell me.”
She spoke confidently at first. “Today at lunch with Noah Parker, my art teacher...” She paused, then after seconds of playing with the table napkin, continued. “He offered me a job at his graphic design company.”
Jim grinned from ear to ear. “What are you... That’s amazing, Beesley!” He pulled her in for a passionate kiss, then immediately went for the glasses of champagne again. “This is great! Two promotions in a day...”
“It’s in Chicago.” She said, just barely loud enough to hear. He froze, just staring at her.
“I’m sorry, what?” He said, scratching his head.
“The job.” She said, loud enough for him to hear. “It’s in Chicago.”
End Notes:
I promise it won't be as long til the next chapter (we're closing in on the end too!) I swear. Let me know your thoughts. Hated it? Liked it? Criticism welcome :)
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.