Date: June 14, 2007 05:51 am Title: Chapter 79 - Three Fuzzy Navels later....
Jim, bonerless, was looking through the kitchen cupboards.
This just might be the best line of fanfic ever written.
And, I logged in just to say so.
Author's Response: *bows* "Thank you, I'll be playing here all week" *bows*
Date: June 14, 2007 05:23 am Title: Chapter 79 - Three Fuzzy Navels later....
I hate broken internets. I hate waking up to broken internets. Mainly because then I am still asleep and can't figure out how to fix it. And then I am awake for like 30 minutes and I get the oh duh, just unplug replug moment. And it all works out.
Annoying.
Wow, weird chapter title - three fuzzy navels later. And I almost typed fizzy. And that would be even weirder. And I think, possibly tickly.
Haha, calling them grams... yeah, thats bad.
Wow, Meredith has looked at Jim's? to see if he has? Yeah, thats disturbing.
And then mentioning, Jim, being... being bonerless.
Yay! I've gotta run now (okay drive, not run), but awesome chapter.
Date: June 14, 2007 04:59 am Title: Chapter 79 - Three Fuzzy Navels later....
ok, great chapter as always, but Miss Pretty Pony?!?!?! bwah hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Date: June 12, 2007 07:55 am Title: Chapter 78 - Girly Girls Running Wild
What?!?!? Can we get the Jim/Pam/BreakroomBonanza as a... deleted scene or something?!? Please?!?!?
Author's Response: Yes, Stilla, there is a deleted scene! In order to read it you have to send me a fan letter at mugginsmai@hotmail.com and I'll send it on to you. It's so not PG-rated so I can't post it in Girly Girl.
Date: June 12, 2007 05:39 am Title: Chapter 78 - Girly Girls Running Wild
Muggins -- you know we want the sex in the break room, er, Pam & Jim in the break room. Put that back in! (TWSS!) And I wonder what is missing from Jim's drawers....
Author's Response: You want sex, I want sex, but my PG rating wants hand-holding, butterflies, and unicorns. Nothing is missing from Jim's drawers, if you get my drift.....
Date: June 12, 2007 05:16 am Title: Chapter 78 - Girly Girls Running Wild
Shush! Want to know what my question was about. It was about the word snot. I needed to find a way to make it not funny. But every time I tried to find a way, it just made me burst out laughing.
So exciting, right
The jar of what the jar of what! I didn't forget you left us hanging the few chapters ago, and I am STILL curious. See, this is why you are... okay, i won't say the word, but it starts with an e and ends with a vil.
Personally, I don't know if I would want Kevin's help with my taxes. I am sure he is an okay accountant, but, I kinda also have the feeling Stacey does it in their household.
Yes, that way of writings dates is weird. I always get confused when it is any other way. My british friend writes it day/month/yeah, and its like, what.... not cool. Specially when I was trying to figure out the 13th month of the year.
And no, Angela. You can't change boyfriends. Because as odd as it is, you are right for Dwight.
The mind boggled when it came to Dwight.
No truer statement has ever been spoken.
Haha. Wow, this just keeps getting funnier and funnier. Now Michael is in JAIL? Wow, Jail and Bail rhymes. Haha. That will keep me entertained.
Author's Response:
There is no way you can make 'snot' not funny. Ask any 5 year old child. The word is inherently funny. Just like 'poop'.
I was hoping I could go a couple of chapters without you calling me starts with 'e', ends with 'vil'! What are you expecting? I jar of JAM? Look elsewhere, sweetie!
Well, Kevin might be really good at accounting. Sure he has trouble adding and Angela's always calling him out on it but the man sure knows how to shred documents! Might prove useful...
I had a boyfriend, not British, who always wrote the dates like that (secretly, I think he wanted to be British). I thought it was dumb, but who knows, maybe it is better than our way of writing it. If Dwight likes it, it can't be all bad... right?
Date: June 12, 2007 04:38 am Title: Chapter 78 - Girly Girls Running Wild
Aww, Muggins, you were just teasing me with those condoms from Pam's purse. Pam probably doesn't even have her purse in the break room, does she? I thought about that when I was beta-ing, but I thought I'd suspend my disbelief.
"Of course, Pam must have brought her purse into the break room. Muggins wouldn't just be toying with me..."
Dance, Kev, dance. (Love to mom and sis.)
Author's Response:
I just hope you're not moonwalking. My sister thinks you are way too forgiving. She slashed through most of my stuff and screamed "WHERE'S THE FUNNY?" But she had a rough weekend with my Mom so I forgive her (plus she's an idiot.)
What's sad was that that was as far as I could go. I'm so not a smut-writer. In my head I had him turning over tables and ripping clothes off... but you saw the tame realization of the idea. So be glad, be very glad, that I didn't go that direction in this chapter. Maybe the next time I've drunk as much wine as, say, Girl7 does on a Friday night... then I might attempt.
Date: June 11, 2007 08:38 am Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
I just have to say, every time this pops up in the 'most recent' list, it is one of the happiest days... You're doing such a fantastic job of keeping this going, I don't ever want to really see it end. I LOVE them practicing as the Martins!! You completely rock. xx
Author's Response: I have sooooo many unfinished chapters of Jim and Pam being the Martins. It is freakin' hysterical. I had one scene where Jim was thanking Pam for bringing out cheese and crackers and gave her a 'little peck on the cheek' but kept messing up. Dwight was like "stop slobbering all over her, Jim!" So they rehearsed the scene over and over to get the right amount of friendly, spousal kissing on the cheek for the big moment (for Dwight) where Pam says "Would you like a Triscuit, Dwight? The bag was just opened. They're not stale." Alas, I had to cut the whole scene (too wordy).
Date: June 11, 2007 08:20 am Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
Nice Muggins! But I have to admit I'm a little sad that Jim and Pam don't get to sit in the conference room holding hands and such anymore. However, I might be less disappointed if I knew they were going to exchange hand-holding for more "exciting" activities. (Or in other words kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss...*continues chanting*) Just sayin.
Author's Response: Hey, the kids have to eat. Let them go eat. You don't want them to die of starvation do you? *picks up chant* "Kiss, Kiss, KISS" (Are you listening, Greg Daniels?)
Date: June 11, 2007 05:33 am Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
Muggins, I know I haven't said (wrote) it lately, but I love you. Really. Sorry if that's weird for you to hear.
Awesomeness: Angela in Fatal Attraction Bunny Boil mode.
"And what’s the male version of a hussy?”
Stud,” Jim fired back.
Muggins for the win!
Author's Response: What I love about that 'stud' line is that if ANYONE ever actually called Jim a stud, he would die three shades of crimson. By the way I love that on TWoP you call your kids the 'hoobabies'. Who you callin' a hoo?
Date: June 11, 2007 05:09 am Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
Wow,, Dwights resume.. ya know, I can't believe how he didn't get hired immediatly when he was fired. I think that resume just speaks for itself. Dwight is a steal ladies and gentleman.
Phyllis knew how to get Meredith over there. I almost typed Angela.... yeah, I don't think the promise of wine coolers would get Angela anywhere.
I like how Jim comes to Dwights rescue. See, sometimes he isn't so evil. :). Ah, who am I kidding, he is never evil. Jim is perfect.
A lemon full of maggots. I can't imagine that being a good, tasty experience.
Have I told you recently that these chapters end to fast? I would be more annoyed, but right now I am starving and a break in the action may just be a good excuse to eat breakfast.
Author's Response:
Chapters ending fast is good! Less chance of you calling me e-vil!
I wish we had a copy of all three of Dwight's resumes. So much I want to know about Dwight tantalizingly offered in 'The Return' never to be revealed. Sigh. At least we got to see Creed's website.....
Jim didn't come to Dwight's rescue. He came to Pam's rescue. Dwight just got the benefit of it. Jim's so gallant.
Date: June 11, 2007 12:14 am Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
Jesus christ! I have been looking forward to this and I wasn't let down..let me tell you! I love this series so much that this chapter seemed short. I look forward to reading the rest of this series.
Author's Response:
Woohoo! I got people finding the faith here at MTT! Can I get a 'hallelujah'! Thank you for reviewing and keep reading. It's good for you. Lots of vitamins. Lose weight. Make tons of money. That's what reading and reviewing fanfic will do for you, guaranteed*.
*not endorsed by the MTT management.
Date: June 10, 2007 11:04 pm Title: Chapter 77 - Jim meets Mr. Filippelli
If you were truly a helpless automaton, those condoms would have been used long ago, and by Jim and Pam. Together. (Really together, that's why they needed...hey, look at the time!)
I like all your changes since I saw it.
Do we get to see some Phyllis/Pam/Meredith girl talk? With alcohol? All right! (/Meredith) What could happen if Pam got a little tipsy on Fuzzy Navel drinks? (Anybody making out in here? Not yet, give it time.) And, because I know you'll threaten me otherwise with other icky possibilities, let me state that it's Jim and Pam I want to see making out. Dwight and Angela, I don't want to see, but it's okay if they're doing that and someone else sees it. But no Pam and Creed, or Jim and Meredith...
Is Meredith going to tell anyone about the contents of Jim's...drawer? Is Pam ever going to check out the contents of Jim's...drawers? (Crosses fingers in Jim's "here's hoping" gesture from The Pilot.)
While your beta's away, I get early copies. This is a happy place.
Author's Response:
Wait!!! Are you saying you want Phyllis, Pam, and Meredith to get drunk and start making out? Okay. I'll see what I can do. I'm a helpless autmaton and must follow orders... dang it. Read the rest of your sentence. HOW DID YOU KNOW? It's like you've got this amazing brain power and can foretell the future. So tell me... what's going to happen in Chapter 100? I just finished writing it and I'd like to know how gooooood you are, Madame ZaZa.
How do you know that Pam didn't use those condoms last night? Just sayin'. Jim's being MIGHTY attentive. (Karen who? Buehler? Buehler...)
Jim's drawers will be fully analyzed by certain Dunder Mifflin ladies.
Date: June 09, 2007 08:07 pm Title: Chapter 76 - Do NOT Stand Next to a Schrute During a Flash Flood
“Dwight, you can not tell Mr. Milton that in an emergency you would rip his daughter’s clothes off.” LOL! Pam is so calm! I love how this is normal Dwight behavior. LOVE this chapter! Can't wait for Meet the Parents: Dwight K. Schrute edition.
Author's Response: If Season 4 were all about Angela and Dwight's affair becoming public knowledge, leading up to the great Meet the Parents and Bizarro Wedding in a Coffin, I would no complain a bit. I just want Jim and Pam in the background giving each other significant looks and Michael freaking out because he is asked to be the BEST MAN!!!!
Date: June 07, 2007 06:53 pm Title: Chapter 76 - Do NOT Stand Next to a Schrute During a Flash Flood
“I’ll take care of my wife’s clothes in a flash flood, thank you very much, Schrute,” Jim laid a protective arm around Pam’s shoulder. He stage whispered into her ear, “Don’t worry, honey. If he comes near you, I’ll smash his bobbleheads.”
lol! that is the best line ever!!lol This story is amazing! Can't wait to see whats gonna happen next!
Author's Response: Thank you so much Mad Hatter! How much do you want to bet that Jim will be checking the weather reports for the next few months and crossing his fingers for biblical rainstorms?
Date: June 07, 2007 05:30 pm Title: Chapter 76 - Do NOT Stand Next to a Schrute During a Flash Flood
Okay, at this point I would pay an insane amount of money to see the Jim/Pam/Dwight scene acted out on my television. I LOVED all the hand holding and the little gestures. So cute. Plus, you know, Dwight's there being Dwight so obviously that's a major bonus! :) Seriously though, I'm loving all the Jam in the last few chapters!
Author's Response: I so wish I had any filmmaking skills whatsoever because there are so many scenes. Hiring - Tall, lanky, green-eyed guy with flippy hair. I especially would like to film the visual ones like all the MTT Smut. All of them. Starting with 'A' and working my way to 'Z'.
10 [Report This]Date: June 07, 2007 04:56 am Title: Chapter 76 - Do NOT Stand Next to a Schrute During a Flash Flood
So somewhere in the lists of phone books, probably around Customs and Dentists, my brain combined some things and saw Crentist :)
“Every father wants to know if his daughter’s potential love interest can protect her in a flash flood.”
Ya know, not that I would ever ask any parent that, I don't think that is really something they worry about... maybe though. I am not now, never will be a father...
Tornados can happen ANYWHERE. I kinda wanted to be a storm chaser when I was little. Partly because of Twister, partly because I was fascinated by all sorts of those things. Earthquakes, Tornados, Volcanos, etc...
And yet another great line:
“Don’t worry, honey. If he comes near you, I’ll smash his bobbleheads.”
No more next button this time :(. Oh well. I guess I will stop calling you evil for at least a short bit...
Author's Response:
I think Dwight has no idea what a father wants to know. Actually I'm pretty sure Dwight has no idea what anyone wants to know. Like does ANYONE want to know the moment that Michael emerged from his Mother's vaginal canal????
Thank you for not calling me evil. And thank you for not throwing garbage at me.
Author's Response: Oh, and while I was doing research for this chapter, I found out that Scranton really does have a real life Tornado Watch System in place. So you are totally right, Twisters can happen ANYWHERE!
Date: June 07, 2007 04:51 am Title: Chapter 75 - Too Horny Pam
I have a reason (not an excuse), why I got a day behind. See, so, you updated it right after I got done with 8 hours of babysitting and a baseball game. So, I was really tired and figured, although tired reviews are fun, I didn't even think I could keep my fingers moving. So I said I would do it the next morning. But then I overslept, because my alarm is on my phone and my phone was apparently on silent. And so, I had to rush to get ready. And then it was another 8+ hour babysitting day, and those kids just wanted to be fussy. Its like, "Okay, Claire, you just chose the game and piece you wanted, and have made all the choices you can, now lets play" "NO I WANNA PLAY, YOU ARE SO MEAN, *cries unstopably* (is unstopably a word? oh well, it is now)... so, yeah. Not an excuse, but a reason.
But now I have two chapters to read and review, and go me! Of course, I also have to start early today... so I better stop writing and get to reading...
“Are you saying I’m supposed to be acting like some horny woman whose husband won’t give her the time of day?”
Yeah, that is a great thought.
:D. Jim is just so happy right now!!!
I am surprised Dwight would even own a camo green tie, that Angela (or Noelle or Andrea) would allow him. Or maybe Green for boys isn't as whorish.
"Don’t overplay the horny."
This is a fic where lines just get better and better. Wow. So funny.
Creed is eating Pam's Mixed Berry yogurt! Does this mean she will have nothing to eat at lunch, and her and Jim will have to share food?
Yay! I was about to say darn you for leaving us with Meredith finding the mother load, but then I remembered I could click next... I dunno, its always fun having a daily dose of GG, but, not having to wait to click next is also good... decisions decisions...
Author's Response:
:) Jim is in blissful heaven right now. This is the happiest Jim's been since Casino night, I think. He doesn't know what the heck is going on but he's willing to go with the flow as long as it means holding Pam's hand and calling her his wife.
I believe Angela Noelle Andrea Milton Martin's notion of whorish colors changes daily based on what Phyllis is wearing. I hated Phyllis Wedding but looooved Angela's line about Phyllis wedding dress being blindingly white. I can't wait for the day that Angela just comes out and calls Phyllis a slut to her face.
Looks like Jim and Pam will have to share food....
Date: June 06, 2007 10:52 pm Title: Chapter 76 - Do NOT Stand Next to a Schrute During a Flash Flood
Aww... Jim called Pam honey. Sweetie sweetie honey.
Muggins, husbands and wives tell each other "I love you" all the time. Pam and Jim want to be authentic, right?
And, um...Andrea Milton's parents never had much of a wedding, just a justice of the peace, a town hall, and a daddy with a shotgun. So before their daughter can go a-courtin', the Miltons have to get married in style. I heard that "Gordo" is not just a Ben Franklin impersonator, and not just a man without SyPhallus, but he's also a reverend from the Church of Many Tongues (Tongues Adept with Cherries) (eww), and he can definitely marry the Miltons today. There's no time to get a photographer, so Alan the cartoonist can draw the wedding, adding Freedom Fries liberally around the margins of the paper. Creed can continuously sing that song he sang at Christmas for the reception, or Darryl can bring up his keyboard.
And, then finally, the condoms can be used and no one would be a hussy.
If wolves came around, removing clothing wouldn't be on the agenda, right? Just for flash floods? And, um, lightning bug swarms? (Fact: the naked male form is 83% more attractive when lit by the light of lightning bugs.)
Author's Response: So are 17% of males LESS attractive by bug light? Why exactly? Kinda obsessed about this question. Did you have a random sampling of 100 men undress during a lightning bug swarm? Do you have pictures? Was Jim Halpert involved? I repeat, do you have pictures?
Date: June 06, 2007 10:37 pm Title: Chapter 75 - Too Horny Pam
What had Meredith found? All the things Jim bought when embarking on his "let's get the girls!" pranks? No condoms - Pam still has the condoms in her purse o'love.
She was transported back to the day when they had been ice skating and Michael had said… Remember when Michael said that, and then Jim said "It's something to think about." and skated backwards away from Pam? That was so cute. (Sorry, couldn't resist pointing out cute moment.) TICKING TIME BAGS! There. I've redeemed myself for my fangirl moment.
Don’t overplay the horny. Excellent advice, especially in public.
Creed. Oh, my, my, muggins. Did you really have Creed say that? I'm going to have to insist that you send Jim and Pam back to another restaurant with long tablecloths if I have to read about Creed saying things like that. Just to maintain balance in the Force and all. Things like that are important.
Do we do the Walrus next? That's what she said, muggins. Is the Walrus just another name for the Seamonster, because um, if so, then NO, we do not do the Walrus next. Koo koo ka no way.
Author's Response:
Koo Koo ka Choo, Baby! When I wrote "Don't overplay the horny" I was laughing so hard. I'm glad you picked that line out. It's not often I make myself bust out laughing, but that one did. Usually I'm like "niiiice" and keep typing. That one was a show stopper for me.
Dang it! You guessed who the Walrus was going to be.... oh well, great minds think alike. Some, however, are pervier than others. How's that crown feeling on your head?
Date: June 06, 2007 09:48 pm Title: Chapter 75 - Too Horny Pam
I WANT MORE!!!
Author's Response: There you go! Another chapter on demand.
Date: June 05, 2007 09:31 pm Title: Chapter 1 - Kiss the Bobble Head
Why don't you write for The Office yet?! You go, awesome work!
Author's Response:
Now, dm_tip, we've had this discussion before. Greg Daniels KNOWS I'm available. I've told him and told him and told him... I'm in the book, Greg Daniels! In the book! And I'm willing to act, too! I'll gladly play Mose's retarded twin sister, Maise. I am totally available. I'm packing my boxes as we speak. Call me!
Date: June 05, 2007 04:59 pm Title: Chapter 75 - Too Horny Pam
I don't know which is better, Meredith going through Jim's drawers, or the fact that she was hoping to find a drawer of panties. Have I told you lately that you rule?
Author's Response: A) what girl doesn't want to go through Jim's drawers?
and
B) I think I might change the mother lode to be a drawer full of panties because I can just imagine the look on Jim's face when he finds out his stash has been compromised.
Date: June 05, 2007 04:47 pm Title: Chapter 75 - Too Horny Pam
Yes! Jim's hands on Pam's hips, Creed's last line, and Meredith up to no good. These are a few of my favorite things! It's so good to have you back Muggins!
Author's Response: Sound of Music meets 'The Office'.... Pam would be just the sweetest Maria ever. Karen would be great as the elegant rival. Imagine her in ballgowns! Dwight would be the Nazi kid. Oddly enough, I know the Nazi kid's cousin. She says he sells hot tubs in Hollywood now. So there you go!
Date: June 05, 2007 05:59 am Title: Chapter 74 - Pam bats her eyelashes. As does Dwight.
HAHAHAHAHA! seriously this just keeps getting better and better. i can just see dwight batting his eyelashes at Jim. and Angela with her threat levels! good stuff.