You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: Moogie Man Signed 9 [Report This]
Date: May 13, 2017 04:02 pm Title: Chapter 3

Well done! Please re view my tuff. I value your opinion.

Reviewer: Moogie Man Signed 10 [Report This]
Date: May 05, 2017 02:18 pm Title: Chapter 3

I think this is a piece you get or don't get. I get it! I hope you review more of my stuff. I like your quirkiness!

Author's Response:

Thanks Moogie Man! 

My thoughts were all over the place when writing this story and there hasn't been any coherent storyline, but I'm glad you like it!

Reviewer: BecauseOfYou Signed [Report This]
Date: April 21, 2017 08:09 pm Title: Chapter 3

Hmmm... I'm not sure what to say about this.

I guess I still like the concept and am curious to see where this goes...
But Jim was just so off. All over the place and not in a way that made sense.
Also, your timeline with Jim was odd. Pam texted him two days after he moved to Stamford but he was already with Karen?

But you also wrote this:

'The first thing I did in Stamford was hit the gym. No time to think about Pam when you're working out, I thought. Stupidly. A week went by, and work happened, and all of a sudden the nightly trips to the gym were replaced by all nighters sitting up in bed, just thinking. Thinking about her smile, her curves, THAT KISS.'

He started work a week after moving but was seeing Karen after two days. I don't mean to be harsh or nitpicking but timeline continuity is important to me.

Author's Response:

Hey idnaoj, thanks for the feedback! 

I agree with you that Jim was written poorly. I didn't give much thought to his 'backstory' in Stamford and wrote some things that were irrelevant or conflicted with other parts of the story. 

Reviewer: BecauseOfYou Signed [Report This]
Date: December 28, 2016 09:48 pm Title: Chapter 2

This is so different! It's very funny, I like it, and I like your writing style!

Author's Response: Thanks! Will have another chapter up soon, glad you like it.

Reviewer: Moogie Man Signed [Report This]
Date: December 24, 2016 02:09 pm Title: Chapter 2

Weird in a Twilight Zone way! Nice change of pace. Opens up new ideas. Way to go!

Author's Response: Thank you, glad you like it!

Reviewer: NobleLandMermaid Signed [Report This]
Date: August 30, 2016 11:09 pm Title: Chapter 1

Very interesting concept! Looking forward to seeing where you go with this!

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans