The day before, Michael had called her into his office. He had been very firm. He wanted her to go with him at lunch the next day to present a check to the Toys for Tots fund. This check was supposed to have been officially given two weeks before Christmas. Michael thought that was ludicrous. If they'd given an oversize check for 300 bucks during Christmas, it wouldn’t have even been mentioned in the newspapers. Every Tom, Dick, and Harry gave money during the Holidays.. Now February, the dead month of journalism, was the perfect time. Dunder Mifflin would get free press and it might make the front of the Around Town section. He was going to wear a tuxedo to "sex it up". He wanted her to wear that “little number” she had worn to Casino Night and some high heels. It would be perfect.

The night before, she had stood in front of her mirror wearing the “little number” and posing. She was holding her hair up with one hand and glaring at her reflection. There was no way she could compete. Karen was sexier in every possible way. Except she doesn’t wear dresses, Pam’s evil little voice whispered. Pam’s evil little voice talked a lot these days. It was her evil little voice that had kept her from turning Michael down flat. Whatever happened to my good little voice? Pam wondered. She thought it might be on vacation. Maybe in Australia... maybe in Mordor.

That day, she went in to work. Wearing the dress. Shy. Unsure. Conflicted. Scared out of her wits. Horny as all hell. The evil little voice was working overtime and it had some interesting suggestions. Most of them she would not do…could not do…she just could not do, for life or money. But they were interesting to think about. She was so busy thinking about them that she was able to walk from her car to the building without worrying if anyone was watching her. She breezed into the elevator on auto-pilot. She was playing out a scenario in which she wore no panties under her dress. Never in a million years would she do it… but it was interesting to think how he would react.

Walking into the office was harder. She postponed by studying the emergency evacuation map by the stairs. She stalled. She took deep breaths. She tried to remember mantras she’d heard on random yoga shows on TV. She contemplated her fingernails. Maybe she should paint them pink like Kelly suggested. She…saw the elevator doors open. It was the Fed Ex guy. He nodded at her and made small talk. She walked along with him into the Dunder Mifflin office. It was nice to fill out the paperwork for him. Kept her hands and mind busy. Kept her eyes focused on the form. He handed her the package…for Toby…from Corporate. Ah! She had to deliver it right away! Might be important! Around her desk, across the room, towards the kitchen door…   She could feel the eyes of her coworkers on her. She could feel his eyes on her. She could feel his hands on her. No, no, no, she couldn’t. That was just her little evil voice.

After delivering the package to Toby (he gave her a sweet little compliment “That’s a pretty dress…do you have a lunch date?”), she was cornered by Kelly. How could she not be when the words “dress” and “date” were said within hearing distance? So that killed an hour. It was like the dress was waiting or maybe the evil little voice, Pam wasn’t sure which. Whichever it was, it knew, and it told her when she should turn around and look in the break room. She saw him, out of the corner of her eye, turn around quick and by the time she was facing him, he was nonchalantly buying something out of the vending machines. She asked Kelly if she’d like a drink and didn’t wait for a reply; she was already walking towards the break room.

“Hey,” she said. It was a good opener. He always responded well to it.

“Hey,” he said. He looked up quick and then looked away again, in the process turning his entire body away from her. There was a pause as he contemplated the wall. “Hey...do you think they’ll ever change the art on this wall?”

“I’ve been meaning to for years. I should bring in something from my art class…” she wasn’t thinking about what she was saying because she was at war with her evil little voice. Her evil little voice was winning.

“That would be good. Make the place more homey.” He was contemplating the artwork with a seriousness that amused her.

“My dress says homey is good.” Pam said quietly.

“What?” He turned and looked at her with a jerk of his head.

“My dress is extremely vocal. I wish I hadn’t worn it. It puts all sorts of ideas in my head… I may be possessed.” She lifted up her skirt a little and looked at it with an aggrieved look on her face.

“Um…do you want me to get a priest? We could have an exorcism.” He was staring at the hem of her skirt with deep concentration. He may have been joking but she wasn’t sure.

“No. He’d probably tell me to take it off…you know…begone..uh…pawn of Satan. Something like that.” Pam shook her head and looked in Jim’s eyes. His pupils had expanded until barely any white showed. She could feel the fabric of the dress tightening around her chest.  “Maybe Angela would be willing to say something. But this dress hates Angela. It makes snide comments about her all the time.” Pam smiled a little and looked down at his hands. There were clenched in fists. The knuckles were white. It made her evil little voice happy to see him barely in control. 

“Who else does your dress hate?” He asked slowly.

“Oh, lots of people. Karen, especially. I’ve tried to talk to it. I’ve explained that Karen’s really cool, really nice, smart, pretty…but my dress doesn’t care. It hates her.”  Pam shook her head ruefully as if she was discussing a disobedient child.

“Your dress seems to have strong opinions. Maybe it needs to…..get out more.” He moved towards her as if pulled in by the discussion. The evil little voice knew better.

“Oh no! That would be very bad. If this dress got out more, why… well…I think my reputation would suffer. It keeps telling me to do very naughty things.” Pam shyly touched his sleeve. “Like it keeps saying…right now…kiss him…kiss him…kiss him…in this very persuasive voice.”

“I always do whatever my clothes tell me to do. My ties give me all my financial advice. They’re never wrong. I think you should do it.” Those last few words were very indistinct.

The evil little voice always liked a good kiss.