"Perhaps you could repeat yourself?" He smiled broadly and moved to kiss her again. And, he did. Pam was lost in it for a moment, existing only in his rough cheek and soft lips, opening with hers. His hands plunged into her hair and his long fingers gently stroked her scalp as his thumbs grazed her cheeks tenderly. Her mouth tingled and she found herself acutely aware of the velvety texture of his tongue. She pressed forward and allowed herself for a split second to imagine all kinds of other things that perhaps he could do with those hands, that mouth. And, then, she broke off the kiss.
"Jim." She said softly, her face flushed and glowing. Her eyes rose to meet his. He gave her a dazed, drunk looking smile. "Jim." more firmly this time. His brow furrowed.
"You need more time." She said to him with a sad, understanding smile. "Even if you don't think it this second, you do."
"But..."
"Karen. Roy. Me, hurting you. Everything. You need to think about everything." He nodded slowly. Of course, she was right, and he knew it.
"I am not going to ask you to tell me anything right now. I just needed you to know -- because I guess you didn't know....but you just had to know....."
"Know?" He looked utterly confused.
"I needed you to know that I love you, Jim. If I can't be with you because you don't want me, I'll have to live with it. But, lately I've been wondering if I'm just not with you because you don't understand how badly I want to be with you.....Now you know. I am fighting for you. Even if you decide to run off to paradise with Karen, I'll at least know I tried."
"I....." He looked so lost. She actually felt sorry for him. "how can you be so calm?"
"Oh, I'm not calm. Rest assured, I will be checking my voice mail every ten seconds from now until the end of time. But, I am not going to put pressure on you. I know that won't help anything."
A light crossed his face, and he looked like he finally understood a question long plaguing him. "Pam. I'm so sorry. I didn't understand.....how hard it was for you.....I....I'm so, so sorry." He hugged her clumsily, and turned to the door. Pam stood silently and watched him go.
When he arrived at his desk on Monday, there was a large bundle at his desk. A quick look inside revealed the paintings he had bought at the art show, and a note from the artist.
Jim:
I am so glad that these are the paintings you chose. I was thinking of you when I made them, you have a way of making me feel a little bit like the flower in the pictures. I will wait for you until you tell me not to. Just so you know.
Pam.
He looked up at the reception desk and smiled with a wave of newfound shyness. And then, the elevator opened, and Karen stepped into the office. He felt himself blush --blush!--as he quickly looked to his computer screen.
This was not going to be easy.
Author's Chapter Notes:
This should wrap up the spoiled spec for Business School. In just two days, it will become AU for Business School, I'm sure. Cocktails spoiled spec to follow.
I am eternally grateful for the bounty that has been given me in this charmed life.
This bounty includes none of the intellectual property associated with The Office. I do have a great collection of bootleg cassettes of 90's Grunge, Blue and White Staffordshire pottery,and Chuck Taylor All Stars, though, so there's that.
