Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable beloved characters, familiar settings, etc. are the property of their respective lucky owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author, sadly, is in no way associated with the lucky owners, brilliant creators, or genius producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.  Seriously.

"Jinx!" Karen crowed.  "Your voice is out of comission until you score me a bag of Herr's."

 Jim gave a blank nod, silently giving thanks the vending machine in the breakroom didn't sell Herr's and almost sighing aloud with relief at an all-day pass on finally not having to keep his guard up, afraid he'd say the wrong thing, or in front of the wrong person.  What had started out, ironically enough, as a distraction to keep his mind as far away from Pam as his body was, had turned into so much...effort.  Especially once he'd returned to Scranton, Karen in tow, seemingly always trying to mark him as hers at every turn, the fun little distraction he'd hoped for--no, needed--had turned into an exhausting effort to keep his whole world from crashing down around his shoulders.  Again. 

He'd seen the looks Pam shot at Karen, questioning her place in his life, had felt Pam looking at him while he attempted to take his new position seriously, tapping away at his computer.  Worse, he'd seen Karen's quizzical glances aimed at both he and Pam, the naked speculation in her eyes.  Whatever Pam felt, or didn't feel, it didn't matter anymore, because he felt it enough for all three of them.  Knew all it would take was one wrong word, one wrong look, and it would all be out in the open: Karen, accusing; Pam, wounded; and himself, beyond destroyed.  He didn't have the energy to attempt to pick up the pieces one more time.

"Well?  I'm waiting!"  Karen was still there, smiling and leaning against his desk, the way...."Come on, Jim.  Didn't anyone ever teach you the rules of jinx?"

"I'm sorry, those are the rules of Jinx, and they are unflinchingly rigid."  He yanked his thoughts back to the present, already attempting to get out of his seat and do whatever it took to end this, before Pam came back from the store with the supplies for this afternoon's latest Party Planning Committmee blow-out.  Whether it mattered to her or not, it mattered to him that someone else was trying to play their game. 

Before Jim could fully unfold out of his seat, Kelly bounced over to Ryan's desk, throwing her arms around his neck and squealing with delight to be touching Ryan.  "Hey, Jim, what are you guys up to?  I totally love what you're wearing, Karen, but I think it might be better with maybe some pink and I don't know, maybe something--ohmigod, I totally want those boots!" 

Kelly lunged toward Karen.  "I was gonna get them the other day, when I was shopping, but Ryan was with me and I asked him what did he think, and he was all, 'Whatever,' but I could tell what he really meant was he thought maybe I'd tower over him and then we'd be all Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman, and that really wouldn't be cool, you know?  Because they're not even together anymore, which is good because he seems really happy with Katie Holmes.  I mean, how much happier can you be than jumping up and down on Oprah's couch?  I totally know Ryan would do that for me, except Oprah just doesn't know him.  Can you believe how much hair Suri has?  I totally couldn't believe it, it looked like she came out like, fully grown, or something, and anyway, Shiloh is way more cute, but why wouldn't she be, with parents that look like hers, even though I still can't believe Brad did that to Jen.  And then with Vince?  Ohmigod, poor Jen!" 

Warming to her theme, Kelly had managed to work her way around between Karen and Jim, though positioning herself with a clear shot of Ryan so he'd be looking at her when he started taking the subliminal clues and thinking about babies. 

Having taken a small pause for breath, Kelly noticed both Jim and Karen were silent.  "Hey, you guys?  You're awfully quiet.  Is everything--"

Karen cut Kelly off before she could launch into another pop culture stream-of-conciousness.  "Yeah, I just jinxed Jim and he can't talk until he--"

Kelly jumped right back in, knowing exactly where this conversation was going, and so relieved to be away from the never-ending silence of her little cube in the back that she didn't even hear Pam come in the door.  "Oh totally!  This is like that time Pam jinxed you, Jim, and you couldn't talk all day because there wasn't any Coke in the machine and that's what Pam wanted and you being quiet was driving her crazy so finally she went out to buy a Coke and made you buy it back from her so you could talk again because she was so sad, Jim!  And it was so obvious you were lonely without being able to talk to her all day and then when you did speak, it was so cute because you said, 'hi,' except it came out all sexy and it was so romantic, and all of us girls were watching and we almost swooned because we kept wondering how either one of you could go all day without speaking to each other when you two always spent, like, all day IMing each other and going over to each other's desks to hang out.  Those jelly beans totally never fooled me, Jim!  And it was so sad then when you left and she didn't have any on her desk anymore until the day you came back.  It's so weird, because even though Ryan and I are, like, so totally made for each other, we never, ever say the same thing at the same time!  Isn't that weird, Jim?"

Finally trailing off as Ryan's shut-the-hell-up! pantomines cut through her conciousness, Kelly looked around and noticed Karen glaring at Jim, Jim looking helpless, and Pam standing by the door with her coat half-on, half-off, with rolls of party streamers falling out of the bag dangling in her hand, staring mutely at the scene in front of her. 

"Oh, hi, Pam.  I'll help you with the bags, because stuff is falling out of them and you know Angela would like totally freak if she saw the streamers hitting the ground, and ohmigod, Pam, do you realize you only got green and orange streamers?  Angela says they're both whorish, but what would she know, her favorite color is gray, so just let her freak out!  Pam?  Wait!  Stop!  I didn't mean it like that!  You're so totally not a whore!  You don't have to cry, I'm sure it'll be all right!  I'll talk to her for you!"  Turning to Ryan, who was resting his head in his hands, facedown, Kelly added, "I think I'll just follow her into the bathroom out there and make sure she's okay, maybe help her fix her makeup."