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"Ohmigod. It was soooo romantic. They were in the kitchen fighting and it was so, so passionate, like in The Notebook, when Noah and Allie are on the dock and it's raining and then he just, kisses her. Jim didn't do that to Pam here, but I bet he did later. You know, how Noah has Allie pressed against the wall and... ohmigod. I wish Ryan would do that to me. What? You haven't seen that movie? You totally have to rent it, it's so awesome. Plus, now, Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams are dating in really life. And they're so, totally adorable."
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"Are we supposed to care? I'm here for a paycheck, not an afternoon social."
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"It was really hot, the way she yelled at him. Really hot."
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"Well, I don't want to toot my own banjo, but if I hadn't told corporate what a good job the Tuna did in Stamford, he'd never have been asked back to Scranton. And Pama-lama wouldn't be out there with a smile, and the Tuna, on her face. Andy Bernard believes in love. He is a lover, not a fighter. No... more... fights."
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"Yeah, it's great. I can't tell you how much I love hearing Kelly go on, and on, and on about them. Every day. I've also watched The Notebook six nights in a row. So, yeah... remind me to thank Jim."
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"They finally got together? God, that's depressing. Happy people annoy me. Got any Scotch?"
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"I think it's wonderful. Such a sweet story. Like me and Bob Vance."
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"It was completely unprofessional. People should not yell or cavort in the workplace. And private matters should be kept private. What? No, I have no comment on the status of their relationship. If co-workers are going to date, it's no one else's business but theirs!"
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"Halpert's dating who? Isn't she the cleaning lady?"
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"The Schrutes do not allow our feminine beings - animal or human - to engage in verbal attacks of any kind. I have coached Jim in this topic before, but it appears he did not act upon the tactics advised - idiot - so he's lucky the outcome was favorable."
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"It would be silly to think I had anything to do with their reunion. I am just... the great intubater... wha..? Instigator? No, I'm pretty sure it's intubater. And I am the great one who told Jim not to give up. If I hadn't intubated him, I doubt they'd be here today. Just one of the many services I offer as a best friend and boss. I don't want to take too much credit, but... well, I'm pretty sure I'll be best man at the wedding."
