Jim Halpert had never been much of a planner. He was sure if he actually had a normal boss, his boss would say his biggest weakness was a tendency to wing things. Rather than plan out his sales calls meticulously like some of his cohorts, he would talk and see where things were going before deciding what products to push and how to do it.

Even proposing to Lisa had been unplanned. He knew it was going that direction and would have thoughts about maybe doing it on a romantic trip or at a nice restaurant. But the actual proposal was most-or-less a spur of the moment thing at a New Year's party, he didn't even have a ring yet.

Out of necessity, there was a lot of planning with Pam. Every meet-up with her had to be decided on days ahead of time, nearly every meal needed a reservation. Normally he would hate such a lack of spontaneity but he actually loved planning things with Pam, having something to look forward to every weekend. He was already thinking about Thanksgiving; they would be in Connecticut by then but would probably drive back to Scranton, they would have to decide if they would go to her parents or to his own. He was also already planning out his Christmas gift to her, gathering up the doodles and drawings she had put on sticky notes and passed to him in meetings over the years and making copies for a photo book.

Of course, he would also get her something nice and store-bought, he thought while carrying around new work shoes and slacks in the main atrium of the Steamtown Mall, maybe some art supplies or photo books about Italy. He passed the sparkling display of a jewelry store. Maybe he'd get her some jewelry, some earrings or a new goal charm or…

The display was full of engagement sets, from simple gold bands with a small solitaire to elaborate encrusted bands and giant, colored diamonds. He really didn't have any opinion about style or cut when he and Lisa bought her ring, simply wanting Lisa to choose what she liked. She went with three square stones, cut in a way that made them very eye catching and looked like way more diamond than it actually was.

He found himself thinking about what would suit Pam best, probably a round or oval stone with a silver band, maybe set surrounded by other stones. Only after a moment did it hit him that he was standing in the mall looking at engagement rings thinking about a girl who he had been dating for barely two months. He didn't even know if they were going to be any good at living together, definitely far too soon to think about proposing, right?

Strangely enough, the idea didn't scare him at all, he actually welcomed it.

A buzz came from his pocket and he awkwardly handed off his shopping bags to his left hand in order to reach his phone. He grinned the second he saw her name and flipped open to see the new message. "Hey there, Mallrat." Mallrat, huh, he thought while swiveling his head, is it possible Pam was here?

"Jim Halpert?!"

Jim barely turned around before a woman all but jumped into his arms, his vision obstructed by wave of amber colored hair. She stepped back and Jim felt a slight panic. "Katy!"

"Oh my gosh, I can't believe I ran into you, how are you?" Katy hands were resting on his forearms and he had no idea how to pull his arms away without it seeming abrupt and weird.

So he just nodded, "I'm fine, how about you, what are you up to these days?"

"I'm good, I work at the Macy's here, accessories department." She thankfully pulled her hands away to motion towards the giant red letters in the distance.

Jim cocked his head and gave her a grin, "Still in the purse game?" He knew immediately he was dangerously close to flirting.

Katy's big blue eyes gleamed and she laughed. "Ha, yes, and are you in the paper game still?"

"Unfortunately, same boss too."

Jim was sure Katy would make some sort of face or a comment about Michael and the uncomfortably and persistent way he had hit on Katy the day she came in to sell purses, but Katy was either too nice, or had blocked it from her memory, and moved on. "So I heard you were engaged or something?" she said.

It shouldn't have but for some reason that comment knocked Jim for a loop. It was a small town and they likely had friends-of-friends in common so he shouldn't have been surprised Katy heard somewhere he was going to get married. Still, he immediate looked to his shoes and felt very awkward. "Um, yes, that is true, I was engaged."

Katy knitted her brows at his tone and purposeful use of the past tense in his statement.

"We, um, broke it off, couple weeks before the wedding," Jim finished, trying to sound as emotionless as possible.

"Oh, no," Katy said softly.

"It was six months ago, and it's was mutual so..."

"Still, I'm so so sorry."

Her hand was back on his forearm again, and his brain screamed that now would be the time to mention he was dating someone. "Thanks, um, I'm actually..."

Katy's eyes darted to something to his right, and he took advantage of her distraction and turned his head, seeing Pam walking up slowly with a terribly unsure look on her face.

"Hey, there she is!" He lifted his arm and Pam smiled, walking a little more briskly. Soon she was by his side and Jim squeezed her shoulder, placing a kiss to her temple. "Katy, this is Pam."

Katy's eyes widened and her smile dropped briefly before she managed to paste it back on, "Hi Pam, I, um, I know Jim from a few years back."

"Katy came into Dunder Mifflin one day to sell purses, it went about as expected," Jim said.

Pam chuckled, "I can imagine. Nice to meet you, Katy. I'm kind of surprising Jim here, just came from New York City."

"New York City, oh, wow, I'd love to live there," Katy mused.

"It's an experience, I don't know though, I think I'm more of a small town girl," Pam replied, her arm snaking around Jim's waist and pulling him closer.

"Well...I should let you two go. It was good to see you, Jim," Katy said, backing away a bit.

"If I need a purse I let you know," Jim said before he could stop himself.

Katy giggled and gave them a wave before walking off.

Jim slowly turned to Pam, ready to find a scowl on her face from his sort-of-flirtatious remark. Lisa certainly would have made some passive aggressive comment about how 'flirting must be a sales technique'. But Pam just smiled politely if a little nervously and reached to straighten his coat lapel. "So, um, surprise," she said.

"Yes, surprise, how'd you know where I was?"

"Mark," she started. "I showed up at your place unannounced and he told me you were here."

"Cool, well, do you have any shopping or do you wanna grab dinner?"

"I, uh, I kinda was just hoping to hang at your place," Pam said, her cheeks growing pink.

"Yeah?" Jim said in a lower tone, wagging his brows at her, and smiling when she giggled.

"I know, not very New York of me, just wanting to say in," Pam replied.

Jim shrugged, "No, definitely more Scranton but that's not a bad thing at all." Pam look to him and shyly smiled, and Jim leaned in for a kiss, a grin pulling at the corner of his mouth when he felt her hand reach up to cup his cheek. "Okay, back to the abode," Jim said and they walked hand in hand down the atrium.

*****

Jim spun around to find an ever-present camera pointed at his face, as it had been for months now.

"We just wanted to get a couple comments," the sound guy said.

Half of him wanted to say no and storm off, but wobbly as his feet felt from far too many vodka shots he knew he would just fall over and really give the cameras a show. Besides, all that waited downstairs was a pissed-off fiancee and more fighting so he stayed put.

"What did you think of the Christmas party?"

Jim forced a laugh, "Well started off terrible, been terrible the last five minutes, but the in-between was actually not too bad."

"Lisa seemed pretty upset," the cameraman said.

Jim stared at the camera with blurry eyes and gave a shrug, "Yeah, she did."

"Do you know why?"

There were plenty of reasons, Jim reckoned, starting with texting Lisa long before Michael showed up with a case of vodka that the party was boring as hell and most definitely not worth her time. And the fact that she absolutely hated it when he got drunk. There was also that hard to explain feeling of a fight being inevitable, the tension being high and unaddressed since Thanksgiving when it felt like her family grilled him for hours about the lack of a firm wedding plan and even a wedding date.

He turned his head and could see Pam through the office door, quickly covering up that she had been watching him. They were friends, she was his best friend in a lot of ways. She got him through the day handing him sticky notes with silly doodles and laughing at his lame jokes and giving him knowing looks during pointless conference room meetings. There were moments, though, when he was sure he caught her staring at him, when her cheeks blushed at his comments, when she gave him something like the handmade gift his hands, a drawing she spent hours on based on a joke that only they knew the significance of. And he would wonder briefly if there was something more, if it was all done out of something else besides friendship, if there was a part of him that actually wished it was done out of something else.

"I don't know," Jim replied to the question he had already forgotten. He excused himself and pushed past the camera crew to the elevator.

*****

Once they returned from the Steamtown mall to Jim's place, Mark was nice enough to actually put on something besides pajama pants and go hang out at a friend's. Jim and Pam whipped up some pasta and chicken and Pam couldn't help but log in her brain that this was the first home-made meal they had had together, complete with a begging dog that neither of them could resist giving a chunk of chicken to. They chatted and laughed, but the scene at the mall was still in the back of Pam's mind, a beautiful redhead throwing herself into Jim's arms. Not that she suspected Jim was up to anything, clearly him running into Katy was a complete coincidence, but Pam was curious what "knowing each other a few years back" meant exactly.

After dinner they sat on the couch, arms around each other searching for something to watch on television. Pam internally debated how jealous she would seem asking about Katy hours later before deciding if this long distance thing was going to work, they couldn't be keeping feelings or doubts from each other.

"So," Pam started, putting her chin on Jim's shoulder. "How did Katy's day of selling purses at Dunder Mifflin go?"

Jim's brows knitted slightly and he chuckled, "Well, first off, you know the company policy is no vendors but Michael made an exception for totally valid and not at all superficial reasons."

Pam giggled, "As all his decisions are."

"And all day he was hovering around the conference room where she was set up and he trying about every move in the Michael Scott playbook. And then Dwight threw his hat in the game, I may have convinced him mini briefcases were the latest business trend and got him to buy a purse."

"I am so sad I wasn't there for this," Pam said, already picturing Dwight confidently carrying a handbag.

"So she needed a ride home and also clearly wanted rescue from those two so I offered and we got a drink and…" Jim gave her a nervous half grin.

"And…. you hooked up?" Pam was surprised at the steadiness of her voice.

Jim's eyebrows shot up, "Well, um, I mean we dated for a few months also."

Pam smiled at his nervous bumbling, "It's fine, she's very pretty, and seems sweet, I definitely get it."

Jim's cheeks reddened a bit, "Yeah, those are the reasons I asked her out. And then it turned out we had absolutely nothing in common."

"So what happened?"

"Don't judge me but I went to a party with her where she was talking to her recently engaged friend and Katy gushed about how badly she wanted to be engaged and plan a wedding, and I guess 24-year-old-totally-terrified-of-real-commitment-me flipped out and told her on the car ride home I thought this was just casual and fun and we were definitely broken up by the time we got to her place."

Pam's eyes widened, "Wow."

"I said don't judge me."

"Are there any other disgruntled exes I should be worried about?"

Jim sat up and turned to Pam. "Are we really doing this?" Pam nodded, "Um, well I mean there's Lisa obviously, before her, Katy. Michelle was right after college, that didn't end badly it just fizzled out and she moved to Chicago. Uh, few college make-outs. Heather was the big one in college, she was my first real girlfriend, and first, you know." Jim blushed again, "I sure thought she was the one but what do you know when you're 19?"

Pam smiled, "You think you know everything, that's for sure."

"So, that's my sordid history, what about Pamela Morgan Beesly?"

Pam's jaw slacked a little, she should have suspected a rundown of Jim's love life would become a rundown of hers as well. "Um, well, warehouse Roy. Which you probably suspected."

Jim smiled slightly, "I had a hunch."

"And… do you remember Danny Cordray?"

"From Ospry?"

"Yeah, we went on a few dates."

Jim's brows lifted, "Wow, now I feel intimidated."

Pam smiled, "Why?"

"Danny Cordray is probably the most attractive man I've ever met." Jim thought for a moment, "Let me amend that, Danny Cordray is definitely the most attractive man I've ever actually physically met."

Pam giggled, "Yeah, he was hot, definitely a smooth talker."

"So what happened, why on earth are you with me and not Danny?" Jim joked.

Pam gave him a playful smack on the shoulder, "C'mon, a guy like that, always on and always seeming like he's selling you something? Girls don't want that, at least not me. Plus I think he thought I was huge dork."

"Well, you kinda are." Jim said with a grin. Pam nearly smacked his arm again but he grabbed her hand, "And he's an idiot for not thinking that's anything but adorable."

Pam gave him a wry smile, "That sounds like something Danny would say, but the difference is I know you mean it."

Jim leaned over to give her a kiss and sat back, "So, Roy, Danny, anyone else?"

Pam felt her smiled fade, "Um, well, in college there was Chris."

Jim's smiled also faded at her tone and he turned his full attention to Pam.

"I met him at a party my freshman year of college and I was so shy back then and he was nice to me and cute. All my friends thought I was pretty lucky to get a boyfriend like that. And it was a lot of fun for a bit, but then … it was all him, you know? We hung out with his friends, we went to places he wanted to go. I started really falling behind in my classes and he didn't seem to care, the less time I spend on assignments the more I spend with him. And besides, what was an art degree gonna get me anyway he'd say. Eventually I started feeling that like too. I just . . . I completely lost myself in that relationship for a while." Pam kept her eyes cast down, blinking back tears. She rarely discussed Chris with anyone. Even now, in the interest of not totally breaking down, she purposefully omitted the part about their breakup, when out of anger Chris told her she was mousy and worthless and she was so worn down a small part of her agreed. She'll tell Jim about all that someday, she thought, just … not today.

She felt a warmth enveloping her fingers and glanced over to see Jim had reached over, his large hand covering hers. "Hey," he said softly. Pam looked up to see his eyes filled with worry, "I will never make you feel like that."

"I know you won't." Pam wiped her eyes can and gave him a small smile, "That's a reason why I love you." Jim's eyes widened slightly and Pam felt her heart jump up her throat. She couldn't believe she said it out loud so easily. She looked down to her lap, shaking her head, "Wow, um..."

Jim's hands were quickly on either side of her face, gently turning her head back to him before he kissed her. His lips left hers after a moment and he smiled. He took a breath and opened his mouth.

"No, it's okay, don't feel like you have to . . . it just slipped out."

Jim smirked, "That's what she said."

"Oh my God," Pam said laughing.

Jim chuckled before lifting his hand to stroke her cheek, "And I love you Pam. I think … I think I've been falling in love with you for a long time."

Pam felt a sting behind her eyes again, but this time it was relief and happiness. Relief that she could finally say it out loud: she was madly in love with Jim Halpert. And happiness that all the things other men made her feel bad about, her dorkiness, her artsiness, her shyness, were all things he loved her for.

Soon her arms were around his neck, and his hands spanning her back. Almost in sync she leaned back as Jim tiled forward, her head soon resting on a couch pillow. And then Casey started to whine at the patio door.

Jim scoffed, "Such a mood killer." He kissed Pam one last time before getting up.

"So, um," she said lifting herself on her arms, "Maybe we should take this upstairs, in case Mark…"

"Probably a good idea," Jim replied from the back door.

"I'll, uh, see you up there?" Pam said, trying to sound seductive but probably just sounded nervous.

"Sure, it'll be just a minute," Jim said, following Casey out the door with a doggie bag.

"You're, uh, gonna wash your hands though, right?" Pam called to him.

Jim looked back and smirked, "Maybe, maybe not, I'll surprised ya." He winked and closed the door behind him.

Pam laughed and shook her head, and headed up the stairs to Jim's room.

For not expecting company, Jim's room was fairly tidy, bed made, only one stray sock on the floor. His desk was cluttered, though, notes and letters strewn about. Above his desk was an almost equally cluttered cork-board, greeting cards and ticket stubs haphazardly pinned up. On top of the miscellaneous papers was a snapshot taken during one of their midway meet-ups.

Pam was posed into front of a brown sign that read in plain white text "Land of Make Believe." They had agreed to meet in Hope, New Jersey because it was nearly halfway between them, and found little besides a pizzeria and this nondescript sign that made them both laugh hard and wonder how exciting this "Land of Make Believe" could possibly be. (Pam later googled it and saw it was a rather fun looking water park and now secretly wanted to go, and suspected Jim did as well)

"You're not snooping, are you?"

Pam spun her head to see Jim leaning against the door-frame and she gave a fake scoff, "I would never." She then motioned to the photo, "You printed this one off?"

"Yeah, it's one of the only photos I have of my girlfriend and I kinda love her so I wanted to put it up," Jim said with a smirk.

"You kinda love her?" Pam said, trying to match Jim's cool, flirty demeanor but internally freaking out at them so casually saying the word 'love'.

"Yeah, I kinda do, like, a lot." He stepped forward and place his hands on her hips. "And I kinda want to pick up where we left off downstairs."

Pam exhaled as Jim began kissing and nipping a little behind her ear. She knew he learned early on that that was guaranteed to turn her to putty. "I kinda want to do that too," Pam said in a breathy voice.

"Let's kinda do it, then," he said, and Pam laughed when he picked her up a little, walked three feet and all but dropped her on the bed.

"That was only kinda smooth, Halpert." Pam said, feigning irritation as he crawled up on the bed next to her then letting out a soft sigh when his lips returned to that spot on her neck.

"Admit it, you kinda love it," his husky voice tickled her ear.

She kinda actually really did.