A date with Jim. I can’t believe I am going on a date with Jim. Jim and me. On a date. Together. O god , what on earth am I gonna wear? And, and what am I gonna say? I pretty much blurted out my feelings at the lake what else can we talk about? Could we ever casually chat again? If we do it’s going to be pretty damn hard to ignore the enormous elephant in the room. Did I ruin the best thing I had going in my life? Even though there wasn’t much left of that particular best thing and I, we aren’t really close and connected anymore, but at least I still had the image of that good friend that I once had. I really want that friend back. Maybe that’s why he asked me out, so we can be friends again…and nothing more… O god… I don’t want to be “just friends”. I want him to be the friend that I could also, also… touch and kiss and grab and.. and sink my nails in his back and.. Okay Pam focus! Just calm down and get ready for the date.

**************

  Did I just ask Pam out on a date? I did. Wow, I asked Pam out on a date. That is pretty bold of me. I can’t wait to be with her and spend time with her without interruptions and without being some sort of an alternate. I can from now on openly be her friend and no one can stop me from being her friend. Except for her of course. Maybe she changed her mind again…maybe she realized, after blurting out her feelings and thoughts at the lake, that in the end I am just good friend material, nothing more. Didn’t she say she missed me being her friend? Maybe by now that’s all she wants from me….. She spilled her guts, is relieved that she did so and now in retrospect just wants to be friends. O god..I no longer want to be just her buddy. I want to be her buddy, but the kind of buddy that can also.....kiss her… and touch her and, and grab her and bite her neck and, and… Jim focus! Go make reservations at that Thai restaurant and shut up. This is what you always wanted, now do it! 

***************

Jim rang the doorbell.

Pam opened the door looking even prettier then he had ever seen her. Her hair untied, big curls dancing on her shoulders and back. She is wearing a denim skirt with a tight fitting but very tasteful white blouse with a soft pink lacy top underneath.

She smiled, ‘Hi’

Jim sighed softly, ‘Hi Pam’

They just stood there staring at each other, grinning, and both not believing that this moment had finally arrived.  

Jim got back to reality first, not really knowing what else to say, ‘So this is your new address then?’

‘O, yeah. Do you want to come in for a tour?’

‘Sure, I want to see that amazing single kitchen place,’ he grinned.

‘No flash photography please and if you behave you might catch a glimpse of the bedroom,’ and she stepped backwards and with a grand gesture held the door open for her guest, ‘welcome to Beesley’s’

Jim grinned and stepped inside, and when he passed her, Pam noticed that he smelled very good. Very manly, very sexy actually. She suddenly realized how big the guy is, he seemed much bigger now standing in her tiny hallway then he does in the office.

Jim walked into the little hallway and immediately smelled Pam’s unique scent; a little hint of vanilla and something fresh that reminded him of the spring.

Pam toured Jim through her single girl home; it didn’t take long for it is tiny. She rushed the tour a bit; she hadn’t had much time to clean when she got home after work. Getting ready for the date had pretty much consumed most of her time and she thought it was maybe taunting fate to clean her place up. Cleaning up meant a lot of things, it’s like shaving your legs before a date even though you are wearing pants. Shaving your legs implies that you expect that the date is going to see them, touch them, and that way you almost peer pressure yourself… she figured that the same might go for cleaning the apartment. She did shave her legs though, and trimmed some other parts. Anyway her place looked reasonably tidy, just some books and newspapers scattered here and there and her little desk was overflowing with her sketchbooks and paintbrushes.

‘This is a very nice place’ Jim said as he was standing in her living room.

‘It’s tiny and a little dingy here and there but it’s okay for now’ Pam said as she got her coat.

‘I think it looks great! I can’t believe how much it resembles you,’ and he turned to the window.

‘So I’m tiny and dingy? Is that what you’re implying here?’

Jim quickly turned around ‘..No! No wait,’

‘Just kidding Halpert, relax’

‘You’re cruel’

‘Sorry’ Pam smiled.

‘Shall we go, before I change my mind about you?’ he said flirtatiously.

‘Too late for that,’ that had come out of her mouth without any thought, she was shocked by her own frankness.

‘Is it now?’ he asked with raised eyebrows and a small but amused smile.

‘No, I’m sorry I just, I’m just,’ she felt the palms of her hand getting moist of nerves, looking for the right words made her stumble over her thoughts, ‘It’s just that…’ she let out a big sigh, ‘o what the hell Jim, I’m nervous. I’m starting to blurt out things without much preconceived thought. It’s a new thing of mine,’ she added half jokingly.

‘Well Pam I’m going to let you in on a secret,’ and he walked towards her from across the room with a sweet smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes, ‘I’m nervous too’

‘Right,’

‘Yeah…, but I thought you needed like a coal-walk to start speaking your mind,’ and he took the coat from her hands and held it out for her.

Pam giggled, ‘well I do blame the foot roasting actually, ‘cause the blurting started that day and it hasn’t stopped much since,’ she turned towards him and buttoned her coat, ‘today I even had the guts to tell Kelly to shut up about Brad and Angelina and urged her to read a newspaper from time to time. I scared myself a little,’ she said only half seriously.

‘I like it,’ he said as he watched her fumble with her coat belt, ‘and I resent the fact that in a bizarre way I have Michael to thank for it, since it was him that ordered that damn hellish walk, but at least something good came out of it,’

‘Aside from Dwight’s roasting suicide attempt slash job application?’ she tightened the belt and looked up at Jim.

‘Yes that was nuts, slash scary funny,’ he laughed, ‘Ready to go?’

‘Yes. Where are we going?’

‘How do you stand on Thai food?’

‘I love it actually, that little place near the park?’ and she locked her door.

‘Yeah,’

‘My mum and I ate there once, and it was really nice’

They stepped outside; it was a beautiful crispy spring evening. The sun was setting and left the sky with pink clouds and many shades of blue and grey.

Jim unlocked his car as he looked up at the sky, ‘The park is not too far from here right?’

‘No just around the corner, shall we walk instead?’

‘You read my mind’ 

It was a ten minute walk; the park offered a good short cut and a nice ambiance. The smell of flowers and cut grass filled the air. There were more people here, kids eating ice cream, lovers strolling along the fountain and an old couple sitting at a park bench holding hands. Jim and Pam both noticed the old couple and it made them smile. Both thinking that it was a good reassuring sign, that it is possible for people to grow old together and still love each other. They walked in silence. Side by side. Caught in their individual thoughts and nerves and aware of a tingling sensation in their stomachs. From time to time the backs of their hands stroked one another. It made Jim’s heart jump, he felt a new energy between them. A physical tension that had carefully been there before but now that they were here, legitimately, it seemed like the energy was building up and flowing freely. No more boundaries, no more complications stood in their way. This was it. 

The restaurant was full, considering the place only had ten small tables it wasn’t a surprise. Jim was glad he made reservations. One table in a corner by the window was left. With wine glasses ready to be poured and a little vase with deep purple orchids.

Jim gestured Pam to the table and very gentlemen like he placed his hand on her lower back. She felt sparks shooting up her spine that made her blush a little, surprised by her physical reactions to his touch.They sat down and smiled at each other. Their knees bumped under the small table, which made them laugh a bit.

‘Pam?’

‘Yes’

'I’m happy to be here. With you,’ it came out of his mouth a bit awkwardly, but the sweet intention was evident to her. He just had to let her know that this meant a lot to him.

‘Me too,’ she replied with a small voice, which indicated him she was still as nervous as him.

He took a deep breath and gathered his thoughts…. ‘Now tell me what happened today at the office. Why is Michael’s office painted black?’

‘Well that was done under Dwight’s new work regime sir,’ Pam explained very matter of factly and with a slight military tone in her voice.

‘Is he maybe a Rolling Stones fan? I didn’t know that about him’

And finally they started to talk like they used to do. The conversations started flowing vivaciously and both of them started to relax and unwind. The cold white wine served with the spicy food helped erase the tension a bit. But most of all it was the fact that they missed each others company and now it was like they finally had the chance to catch up. At first the topics were very much office related. Pam told Jim about her secret mission and Jim told her about Jan’s breakdown. Eventually the topic of Jim and Karen could no longer be ignored. Jim told her about their day in the city and how he decided, during the job interview, to go back. Without obviously asking for some sort of confirmation about his feelings for her, Pam did want to know why. What made him change his mind?

He sighed and looked her straight in the eyes with a happy sad look.

‘Yogurt lid’

‘Yogurt lid-' Pam carefully smiled, ‘should I not have done that?’

‘Well it did make me look a bit foolish,’ he smiled openly and raised an eyebrow, ‘I mean here I was at an interview at corporate and I opened my folder to hand David some papers and instead I completely blanked out. I just stared at this little note and all these images started flashing through my mind, completely lost my focus on the task at hand you know,’

‘I’m sorry Jim,’ Pam reached out her hand and placed it in the middle of the table, ‘That was not my intention. It was the only way I could think of to say something personal,’

‘I know and I am glad that you did,’ he placed his hand on hers and stared at her hand while stroking her knuckles, ‘I utterly forgive you for ruining my career,’ he smiled, ‘and for almost having me killed by an angry warehouse guy,’ he guffawed.

‘O god,’ and she covered her face with her free hand.

‘No, no Pam please,’ he reached out and pulled her hand away from her face. He held her hands tightly, ‘don’t think about it. It’s okay. It’s really very very okay,’ he tried to meet her eyes. She looked at him with slightly wet eyes and a guilty look, ‘it’s okay Pam,’ he whispered, ‘we’re even. I messed you up while you were engaged, which like you said made you make some drastic changes, now it’s my turn to make some drastic changes. Okay?’

Pam sighed and smiled, ‘Okay if you wanna see it in that perspective….’

‘Okay. Now tell me what you have been up to outside of the office’

The rest of the dinner they spend talking about anything but work. Movies, art, music and life outside of Scranton, Pennsylvania.

Whenever possible they touched hands. Pam reached out for her wineglass and Jim stroked her fingers, Pam lingered to pick up the glass. She closed her eyes briefly, trying to indulge on the sensation. The conversations amiably continued, but they were becoming more and more aware of each others physical being. The slightest movements of legs gave slight aroused like electric shocks longing to be prolonged. She stretched her legs a bit and bumped into his long legs. He also stretched out his legs a bit. By now travel was the topic. She leaned her leg against his. Mexico. He made up and downward motions with his left leg, stroking her lower right leg. Australia. She tangled her left leg around his right leg. Amsterdam, London, Barcelona. He moved his legs and wrapped his feet around her ankles and pulled her legs toward him. All the while the conversation kept going both of them pretending to ignore the little secret gestures under the table. Egypt. The dinner was finished and the waitress cleared the table and brought them mint tea with fresh mint leaves, served in tall glasses. It tasted amazingly refreshing. She moved her left leg up and down, stroking his calf. Thailand. The tea was finished and Jim asked for the bill. Not exactly knowing what to do next, Pam excused herself and went to the ladies room.

Jim didn’t know what to do next either, it was kind of save to flirt with her here in public, but now that the moment had come that they would be alone again he got nervous again. He paid and sat there slightly paralyzed when Pam came back. He watched her move through the restaurant, passing the small tables, and watched her as she briefly stopped to talk to the waitress who gave her a purple orchid, unaware that she was being watched by a man in awe. He couldn’t get over the fact how good she looked tonight and that he was here with her.

As if she felt his eyes she suddenly looked into his direction and their eyes got locked. Neither of them smiled, they just stared at each other. Jim nodded almost unnoticeably, Pam nodded too. Jim got up and got their coats.

They stepped outside and only now noticed that it had started to drizzle. Jim grabbed her hand as they crossed the street to the park entrance. In complete silence they slowly wondered into the park, no hurry to go anywhere else.

‘I think the rain is getting worse,’ Jim said as he started to walk a bit faster.

The rain was quickly becoming more and more vast and in the far distance there was the sound of thunder.

‘Maybe we should wait somewhere for it to pass,’ and Pam looked up at the sky.

‘Yeah,’ Jim pulled her hand and started to walk even faster, franticly looking for some sort of shelter. Nothing, no tall trees in sight, no gazebo, nothing to shelter under, just a dark park.

‘Over there,’ and Pam pointed to the other side of the park, ‘there are taller trees on the other side of the lawn,’ she knew the park quite well; she had sat under those trees, sketching.

‘Wanna make a run for it?’ Jim had to raise his voice for the heavy rainfall was noisy.

‘Uhm,’ and Pam looked at her pretty strappy heels and her already soaked feet, ‘sure’ she smiled and took off her heels.

‘Are you sure?’ he smiled amused.

‘Come on wussy!’ and she started to run across the lawn on her bare feet, holding her shoes and purse in one hand and with the other hand she tried to close her coat.

‘You’re insane!’ he shouted, for a few seconds he watched her run on her bare feet and heard her giggle and shout a little as the raindrops were getting heavier and heavier. He leaned his head back and let the rain splash on his face for a seccond indulging and thanking for the moments to come, then he also started to make a run for it. He felt the raindrops on his face and felt them soak his coat and then his shirt, he didn’t care. He could see Pam disappear in the darkness under the trees. He felt that the grass ended and that he stepped on a paved path, but no sight of Pam.

‘Pam?’

‘Here,’

He turned around and saw her standing under the trees, ‘How soaked are you?’

‘I think that even my underwear is soaked,’ she grinned, ‘you?’

‘Same here,’ he smiled, ‘so much for sheltering…’ and he walked towards her.

He was panting a bit, his new haircut had lost its trimmed look, Pam thought he looked more like Jim this way, and water was gushing from his face down to his neck. His long-sleeved shirt was sticking to his chest.

He ran his fingers through his hair. As he walked towards her he could see she was also panting and her hair lost the curls and she had pulled it to the back. Her coat was soaked. He could see her blouse was sticking to her body and the lace from the pink top underneath it was visible through the thin fabric of the white blouse. She was still holding her shoes.

‘You should put those back on,’ he pointed to her shoes.

‘Yeah,’ she leaned with one hand on his shoulder and balanced on one leg as she tried to put on her shoes. She left the straps open, her hands were too wet to close the tiny clasps.

‘Let me,’ and he kneeled down and patiently started to close the strap of her right shoe. His hands on her ankle gave her little chills of delight. She felt a little of his warm breath on her skin. He moved to her other leg and held her ankle. She couldn’t see what he was doing but she could feel the strap tightenen around her ankle. She felt it close. His hand gently went up her calf and then he let go. He got up and they stood face to face.

‘Thank you,’

‘You’re very welcome,’ and he stepped a little closer.

Rain was still dropping on them as they stood under the trees. She could feel his body heat coming through his wet clothes. Raindrops were running down his face. She felt her breathing getting heavier.

He noticed it too. Her make up had run a little bit and gave her slightly smokey eyes. The picture he was seeing was in black and white in the darkness of the trees, but could clearly see her eyes twinkle. One strand of hair was dangling down her cheek. He reached out and put it behind her ear; his hand lingered and touched her neck. His thumb caressed her cheek.

She closed her eyes and sighed a little sigh. Her mouth opened a bit. He moved his other hand to her neck too. She opened her eyes and saw Jim looking at her with such a steamy look on his face that made something in her lower belly flutter.

His breathing got heavier too. His eyes were half closed. He opened his mouth and his eyes moved to meet hers. He leaned in and kissed her cheek. He moved up and kissed her temple. Sweet, soft, slow kisses. She closed her eyes. He kissed them. She gave a little moan of pleasure.His cheek brushed hers; she felt the little stubbles gently scrape her cheek, his big hands holding her tenderly.

She kissed his jaw. Her lips moved to his ear down to the dip below. He felt her exhale gradually and heavily. He felt sparks rushing up and down his entire body. Her free hand moved to the back of his head, she slowly ran her fingers through his wet hair. Up and down to the back of his neck.

He ran his hands up and held her face. Their eyes met again. He leaned in. She dropped her hands. His lips found hers. Gently. Gentle slow kisses. He felt her starting to kiss him back. She dropped her purse; her hand moved up again and stopped at his chest. She felt his heart beat, she felt his collarbone, her hand moved down and felt the curves of his chest. Her other hand reached into his coat and moved to his warm back. Her fingers ran up and down the curves of his spine.

He opened his mouth further and his tongue ran along her lips. The warmth of her mouth and the sweet taste of her lips made him breathe heavier and heavier. He felt her hand and her nails on his back; it made him kiss her more passionately. Her mouth opened further. His hands moved to the back of her neck and down her back. He pulled her closer. She arched her back and pressed herself against him. A little grunt came from his throat. Her tongue met his.

Their kiss got deeper and deeper. Hands started to move faster, more longingly. His hands moved down to her waist. Her coat was open and his hands slipped in. He held her small waist in his big hands. He moved them up and down her sides and back. He felt the lace of the top through the wet blouse, the back of her bra and her shoulder blades.

Her mouth moved away from his lips and went down to his neck. She gently bit his jaw and neck. He leaned his head back, drowning in the sensation of her lips and tongue running up and down his neck. His hands moved to her front, her waist, her hips, her beautiful curves. Hers went down to his waist and found the hem of his shirt. One hand went underneath and felt his warm skin. Soft little hairs on his lower stomach running up to his navel. He felt his arousal grow stronger, moved his hands up and found her heaving breasts. Her hand moved up and ran her fingers to his chest. His nipples were hard; she let her nails run over it. He suddenly moved his head and placed his mouth on hers. A deep kiss, a demanding passionate kiss. His hand found the buttons of her blouse and he tried to open them. The wet fabric was not cooperating, suddenly he felt Pam’s hand and it opened the buttons. His hand went in and he suddenly stopped.

Pam, expecting to feel his hands on her breasts, looked up at him trying to find the reason why he would suddenly stop. She let her hand come out of his shirt.

He looked her deeply in the eyes and he firmly said, ‘Not here Pam, lets go,’ he wanted to pick up her purse, but felt that he should wait a moment; instead he took her by the hand.

A bit shocked by this sudden end to their embrace she stared at him.

He started to try to button her blouse again, which he couldn’t.

Pam playfully slapped his hands and started to button her blouse. As she did she looked at Jim taking a step backwards, he smiled an amused smile, but she could see his eyes told her something else, shock? It made her giggle a bit.

They both nervously started to laugh. Although all this seemed to be what they both desired more than anything else in the world, it was a very bizarre and an overwhelming sensation to actually be here. Pam had to agree with him; this was not the place to do this. ‘So this is what you do on first dates Jim?’ she asked in an attempt to lighten the tension.

‘Yeah, I only go on dates when the forecast says "rainy" and then I lure women into parks and feel them up. Works like a charm every time,’

‘pfff!’ She giggled, ‘so a cold shower won’t slow you down then?’ she giggled.

‘I think the heat coming from us made this the first naturally hot shower in Scranton. Ever,’ and he chuckled with a mix of embarrassment and nerves. A little voice in the back of his head couldn’t believe that that was him and Pam just now.He had imagined being with her numerous times, but never did it get this steamy. Well actually it did, but he never thought that a wild dream might actually become a reality some day, and honestly..it made him a bit nervous. But good lord did he want it. But realizing that this might completely get out of hand and that he would make love to her for the first time in a park just didn’t seem right to him. But look at her, he thought, he watched her rearranging her clothes. He realized that she caught him staring at her, and he felt himself blush. He now bended over and picked up her purse, took a step in her direction and kissed her softly, took her by the hand, ‘Shall we?’

Pam only nodded as a reply and took the completely soaked purse from his hand, thinking that her phone probably drowned and her orchid got squished.

They started to walk back to Pam’s place. His hand was firmly holding hers and after they had crossed the street he laid his arm around her shoulders. She fitted perfectly under his arm and it made him reassuringly smile. He felt that Pam was shaking and quivering. ‘Are you cold?’

‘I’m not sure really,’

‘Not sure if you’re cold?’

‘I think it’s either cold or I don’t know, nerves? Anticipation? I can’t seem to stop shaking,’ for the last minutes she had been trying not to tremble but she couldn’t make it go away. She was in fact nervous. It had been a while since she had been with a man and she had pretty much been with only one man all her life. Insecurity had taken over, in the park she was fine, completely sunk in the moment, but now she had time to think about it, and knowing where they were going, and what would probably happen once they got there made her anxious. But this is Jim. It’s Jim, the guy she had longed for for so long. Sweet, gentle Jim. Well sweet, gentle, hot Jim actually.

‘I would offer you my coat, but I don’t think it’ll keep you warm much,’

‘It’s okay really, never mind,’ she muttered with a strangled voice.

Jim stopped and turned to her, ‘Hey’ he whispered, ‘come here,’ and stepped towards her and put his arms around her, ‘let me warm you a bit,’

She looked up at him through her eyelashes and smiled a careful smile. He looked so handsome in the dimmed streetlights. His hair in disarray, slightly swollen lips and a twinkle in his eyes. She exhaled deeply, and felt herself calm down. He leaned in and kissed her. Gently. This man had a substantial kissing gift she thought, and she felt her body warm up, responding to his touch. She unconsciously replied his kiss. The kiss became more intense and she felt his lips parting. Warm and wet. His grip tightened. She pushed herself towards him. Here we go again, she said to herself, Pam, take control. She slowly pulled away from the kiss, she lingered her lips in front of his, ‘I’m warm now,’ she whispered. She felt his lips curl in a smile,

‘Good,’ he whispered back and he loosened his grip.

They started to walk again. In a slightly lighter more relaxed pace.