November 22, 2006, 10:47 pm

Pam had never really liked talking on the phone. Even when she was a teenager she had never been one of those girls to go scrambling for the phone whenever it rang. There was just something about holding a piece of wired plastic up to her ear that was annoying. And who really likes getting phone ear anyway?

So, of course, it made perfect sense when she chose to be a receptionist and answer phones for a living.

In a moment of pure boredom at work Pam had calculated how many times she had answered the phone for Dunder-Mifflin. She had worked there for four years, seven months and eight days. Which, give or take a few days off for sick days and vacation time, was about eleven hundred and twenty days of work. Multiply by eight hours a day, it came to eight thousand and sixty hours of sitting behind that desk. On average she estimated that the phone rang about ten times an hour. So, if the math was correct it meant that she had said the words, “Dunder- Mifflin, this is Pam”, about eighty-nine thousand, six hundred times.

89,600.

The number made her a little sick.

Needless to say, by the time she got home there was absolutely no desire left to answer the phone or talk on the phone or even look at a phone.

Of course, there were exceptions to be made.

Pam was perched on the bathroom counter plucking her eyebrows when her cell phone began vibrating, the lyrics to Keane’s “Somewhere Only We Know” echoing around the tiled bathroom.

She grinned and flipped it open, “Welcome to the Party Girls Hotline. This is Candy. How may I service you tonight?” Her words came out in a throaty purr and she bit her lip at the short silence on the other end of the line.

“Candy huh? You must be new. Usually when I call I talk to Whisper.”

Pam snorted, “What kind of name is Whisper?”

“I don’t know. It’s from this movie I saw.”

“Movie. Uh-huh. Sure.”

“Well, now my secret’s out. This is what I do on a Friday night. And Saturday nights and well, any night really.”

“Sick.”

Jim laughed, “And what would you have done if that was your mother on the phone?”

“Oh, I knew it wasn’t her. She doesn’t call me late on Friday nights. See, she has a life.”

“Wow. That hurts… But hey, what are you doing then?”

“Sitting around and anxiously waiting for your phone call.”

“Obviously.”

Pam smiled into the mirror, “So anything exciting happen this week in good ol’ Scranton?”

“I wouldn’t call it exciting. But Ryan quit.”

“Really? So Michael finally pushed him over the edge huh?”

“Actually, I think it was a combination of Michael and Kelly and a visit by Todd Packer last Friday. We got here on Monday and all his stuff was gone.”

“Just like that? How’s Kelly taking it?”

“Not well. Apparently he didn’t let her in on his decision to leave and now he’s not returning her calls. So, yeah, that’s all I’ve heard about all week.” He paused, “It’s been a long week.”

“Aww, poor baby.”

“Hey, don’t feel too sorry for me. You should see how Michael’s handling it.”

“He’s pretty devastated?”

“More than that. The guys been depressed all week. Holed up in his office crying and eating chocolate and listening to Alanis. It’s pretty sad.”

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Maybe. But seriously, it’s been a rough week on the guy. With Ryan quitting and the documentary crew gone, I don’t really think he knows what to do with himself.”

“Poor guy. At least he has a girlfriend to comfort him now.”

“I don’t know Pam. She may not be enough to make him forget about Ryan. This thing goes pretty deep. I don’t know if he’ll ever be able to hire another temp again.”

“Wow… So, is it all weird in the office now that the cameras are gone?”

“Yeah, I had almost forgotten what it was like before. Everyone’s toned back down. Dwight’s even more relaxed. It’s weird though, in some ways it’s completely the same. I didn’t realize how use to the cameras I was. At the end I hardly even noticed them anymore.”

“I know what you mean. Kind of scary though right? Sometimes I wonder exactly what they caught on tape.”

Jim was quiet for a moment, “Actually, Greg told me that he would send me a copy of the documentary once it was all finished. I guess everyone gets a copy or something.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I told him that it was okay. I didn’t really need to… um, you know. Relive it all.”

“Yeah.” Pam frowned into the mirror as the line went silent. In the back of her mind she had always known that the documentary would eventually be finished and shown to people but she still wasn’t thrilled about the idea. One of the roughest years of her life had been documented on camera and she wasn’t quite ready for that to go public.

Jim coughed, “So, has work gotten any better?”

“Well, if I ignore the condescending way Jan talks to me and constantly remind myself that it’s not going to last forever, then yeah, it’s not too bad.”

“You could always quit.”

“You’re one to talk.” Pam tucked the phone between her shoulder and ear and grabbed her toothbrush.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I mean, that you should take your own advice. Find something you actually want to do with your life.”

“I’m fine.”

She shook her head as she brushed her teeth, her words coming out slightly mumbled over the toothpaste, “Ha. You’re not fine. You hate selling paper, you hate Dunder -Mifflin and it’s about time that you left.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah. For your own sake. And mine. Because, frankly, I’m sick of hearing you complain.”

Jim laughed, “I don’t complain.”

“Oh sure. You don’t complain. You just get that sarcastic tone whenever you mention work. That tone that says, sure I love my job about as much as I’d love having each of my toe tails ripped out one by one every single day.”

“Okay, Ms. Expert On Careers Goals. What would you have me do?”

Pam spit out the toothpaste and rinsed her mouth out, noting that the irritation in his voice wasn’t necessarily directed at her. “First, don’t get all snotty with me. I’m just trying to be a friend. And second, I don’t know. What did you want to be when you were younger?”

“I told you. Professional basketball player.”

“I’m serious.”

“Guitarist in a grunge band.”

“Jim.”

“What? I really don’t know. It’s was all a long time ago. I wasn’t like you. There was never any one thing I wanted to do. Well, you know except for just living life to the fullest and enjoying my time here on earth.”

“You’re full of it.”

“Okay, maybe I just don’t want to talk about this. It’s Friday night Pam. And I didn’t call so you could lecture me. That’s my mom’s job.”

“Fine. But I’m not done with this.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt it.”

Pam rolled her eyes, “So why did you call?”

“I’m bored.”

“Oh, I’m honored.”

“Yeah well, what can I say? It's Friday night and I’m home alone, in my pajamas, making a peanut butter sandwich. So I think, I’ll call my good friend Pam because I haven’t talked to her in at least a week. And she’s the one that always saves me from boredom.”

“And how did you know I wouldn’t be partying it up in the city?”

“Maybe because you say things like ‘partying it up.’”

“Shut up.”

Jim laughed, “Well, there was also that message you left me, ‘Jim, it’s Pam. Call me later. I’ll be around all night and I just need to hear the sound of your voice.”

She snorted, “Hmm, I don’t remember saying that last part.”

“You were thinking it though.”

“If I didn’t know you better I’d say you were a cocky bastard.”

“Woah. Pam. Watch the language.”

“I’ve said worse.”

“Yeah, I’ve had the privilege of hearing it. Who knew you had such a dirty mouth?”

A hundred different comebacks whirled around in her brain, each one more scandalous than the previous and she had to bite her tongue to keep from saying anything. The silence on the other line said that Jim’s thoughts mirrored her own.

Pam grinned and dropped her toothbrush into the holder, flicked the light off and started down the hall toward her bedroom. She was met halfway by Jenny throwing open the door of her room and running into the hall.

“You done in there?”

“Yeah. Are you going somewhere?”

“Over to John’s. Don’t wait up.”

“Don’t worry.”

Jenny smirked at the phone, “Who are you talking to?”

“Jim.”

“Figures. Let me talk to him.

“No. Jenny… hey!” She threw up her hands as Jenny ignored her protests and pulled away the phone.

“Halpert. You owe me fifty bucks.”

Jim snorted, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Crazy.”

“No. No. No. Don’t think you can get out of it like that. I won that poker game fair and square. Pay up.”

“I still think you cheated.”

“Why? Because I’m a girl? Sexist pig.”

“No. Because I lose to you every time.”

“And you never learn your lesson do you?”

Jim laughed, “Okay, fine. What do you say we go double or nothing?”

Jenny cocked her eyebrow, “Intriguing. You’re really are a slow learner aren’t you?... You’re on. Next Friday. Eight o’clock. But this time we play on my turf.”

“I’ll be there.”

With a flick of her wrist Jenny tossed the phone at Pam. She wiggled her eyebrows, “You like that? Got him to come over for ya.” She danced down the hallway and Pam rolled her eyes as she put the phone back up to her ear.

“You there?”

“Yeah. You know that roommate of yours is crazy.”

“She did beat you. Several times. You’re just a sore loser.”

“Who’s side are you on here Pam?”

“Hers. Obviously.

“That really hurts. I thought we were friends.”

“Hmmm, well, I’ve known her longer.”

“That’s great. I guess I’ll just have to come over next week and impress you with my skills.”

“Oh, so, you weren’t playing to best of your abilities before?”

“ Nah, I let her win.”

“Fine Mr. Hotshot. You come over on Friday night and show me what you’re made of.”

“Oh, I plan on it.”

Pam bit her lip and shut the door to her room. She nestled the phone between her ear and her shoulder and began picking up clothes and art supplies that were scattered around the room.

“How’d your latest project go?”

“Good actually. I think I’m starting to get a handle on this whole computer design thing. Although, I have to admit that there’s still nothing better than an old fashioned colored pencil and paper.”

“How archaic of you.”

“I know. Don’t tell anyone in my class.”

“So, you working on anything new?”

“Hmm, just random sketches of the city.” She didn’t mention the ever growing pile of sketches of him that she kept in a box in the closet. Or the stash in her desk at work. Or the crumpled napkins in her purse.

It wasn’t always voluntary. Sometimes she would just be doodling at her desk and then… there he was. His face, his hands…

“What are you going to do when the class is over?”

“I’m not really sure. Jan said there might be a position opening at Dunder- Mifflin. So, you know, I wouldn’t have to leave our illustrious company.”

“How great for you.”

“I know… But uhh, Jenny has this friend who’s working on a children’s book. She showed her one of my drawings and now I guess she wants to meet with me. See if I would be interested in doing some illustrations for her.”

“Seriously? Pam that would be great.”

“I know. I don’t want to get my hopes up but… I’m actually kinda excited about the idea. I’m already working on some ideas. I know it wouldn’t pay a lot but as something on the side…”

“You should definitely do it.”

“Yeah, so, cross your fingers for me.”

“Will do.”

Pam smiled and flopped onto her bed so that she was facing the ceiling. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to imagine for a moment that he was lying there next to her. Unbidden thoughts crossed her mind and for a moment she let them, marveling in the heat that spread quickly through her body. Her hand drifted up to her neck and she remembered with alarming clarity the heat of his lips on the soft skin there.

It had only been a moment but she could look back on it now without guilt, without pain… and she did so often. Not that they ever talked about what happened in that stairwell. Not that the moment had ever been repeated.

After all, they were just friends.

“I thought about being a teacher for awhile.”

“What?” Pam was startled out of her thoughts and tried to pull his words out of the fog in her brain.

“I don’t know. It was just this brief idea in college.”

“Jim Halpert. Did you just express interest in a certain career?”

“Hey, you were the one that was all concerned that I was throwing my life away.”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. You were saying?”

“It’s stupid. I just… in college I coached a middle school basketball team and I had a good time working with the kids so… it was just something I thought about. Briefly. Very briefly.

“You would be an awesome teacher.”

“Remember, I didn’t tell you this because it’s my life long dream. Just making sure that you knew I didn’t always want to work in paper.”

“I’m just saying. You should think about it again.”

“I’m going to regret telling you that, aren’t I?”

“Oh yeah.”

Pam flipped around so she could crawl under the covers. She snuggled into her pillow and yawned, “So, you got big plans for Thanksgiving?”

“Not really. I think it’s just going to be a quiet dinner with my mom and sister and brother in law. I’m saved from having to see the rest of the family until Christmas.”

“Does someone have unresolved family issues?”

Jim laughed, “Not exactly. The big problem is my cousin’s kids. Last year they were under the impression that I was some sort of human jungle gym. I think they have some sort of unspoken challenge between them to see who can send me over the edge of insanity.”

“Somehow I doubt that. I’ve seen you with kids. They love you.”

“Oh, normal kids maybe. These are not normal kids. These are the spawns of something evil.”

“I thought you said they were your cousin’s kids.”

“Yeah. I rest my case.”

Pam giggled, “Got it. Remind me to stay away from your extended family.”

“Not a problem. So, how about you? Is your whole family getting together?”

“Oh yeah. Another Beesly Family Thanksgiving. The whole clan gets together every year. My mom and my grandma and all my aunts cook all day while the men and kids play football in the backyard. Then we all get together around a table so long we have to stick it in the hallway and everyone has to say something they’re thankful for.”

“Sounds nice.”

“Yeah, usually it is. But this is the first time I’ve seen everyone since… And I’m not really looking forward to answering all the questions. Plus there’s that extra bonus that I will be the only single person there this year.”

“Trust me Pam, it happens to the best of us.”

“God. My little sister’s even bringing her boyfriend. Granted he’s got six piercings and three visible tattoos and makes the vein in my dad’s head bulge but at least she’s got someone. Then there’s my brother Sam who just proposed to his girlfriend so he’ll be sickeningly happy. And my brother David who’s barely spoken a word to me since the wedding was called off. So yeah, it should be fun.”

“Well, if you need backup, you can call me. Besides, my mom would probably love to say hi.”

“Hmm, that would be nice. I miss talking to your mom.” She yawned loudly again.

“Pam?”

“Yeah?”

“Are you falling asleep?

“No… Maybe a little.”

“Okay. Then why are you still talking to me? Go to sleep.”

“Fine.”

They both paused awkwardly, as they always seemed to do when it came to this point in the conversation.

“I guess I’ll talk to you later. Night Pam.”

“Night Jim.”

She flipped the phone closed and rubbed her ear.

It was getting increasingly difficult to hang up when she talked to him.

Try as she might, she could not erase that growing desire to see his face when he whispered goodnight. The desire to snuggle into his warmth and feel his arms around her.

Pam closed eyes and sighed into her pillow, finally drifting to sleep on the image of what might be. Someday.